I need some advice.
I'm going to be going on a vacation overseas in a few weeks by myself, but I met a girl online and we've become good friends. We will definitely be meeting up for a few days too. Well, this girl is really caring for me and even is flirty with me sometimes. However she is aware of my situation. I'm 28, never had a girlfriend before, and I've only had bad experiences with sex in the past. We've had personal talks so she knows about this. She told me she felt sad because I've never had a "real" first kiss. Anyways, I'll be staying in hostels during most of this trip, but on the last day I'll be visiting her town. And she has told me several times I should just stay at her place that night to save money. The thing is, I've seen pictures of her apartment... it's small and there is only 1 bed. I have a feeling that she's going to try to make a move on me when we hang out. Just the way she talks to me about things, and especially that thing about her apartment.
I'm not sure what to do. I just don't think I'm comfortable with the idea of having sex again. Sometimes I wonder what a "good" experience is like. But, something about it just doesn't seem right to me. Like I shouldn't do it. If I stay with her, what do I say if she tries something? I think she's a good friend..
>>18348057
If you don't want to, don't.
If you want to stay there, but don't want to fuck her, don't fuck her.
If you secretly want to fuck her, stay there and try to work things toward fucking her.
Such simple.
>>18348057
It could be your first good experience.
>>18348068
Yeah I hear you. I just feel pressured I guess by people telling me this>>18348071
Seems like you're better off trying it with someone you know likes you and cares for you, rather than some random you meet later.
>>18348094
I would like for you to give me all of your money.
Feeling pressured?
Fucking stop caring what other people want from you. Jesus shit.
>>18348246
sex is intimidating to me. I regret my past experience, I'm worried about adding another to that list
>>18348250
I don't know, it's just different. I'm not suppose to give you my money. But according to biology and society, I'm "suppose" to be having sex
>>18348268
Well, you're not going to change that until you have the one time where it's great
>>18348272
But what if it is just another bad memory?
>>18348274
Then you're not really worse off than before, and now you know what it looks like so you can bail early if it's not going well
>>18348280
well, if it is another bad experience I'll just feel worse about myself. I still feel regret from my past experiences and those were years ago. It's hard to not think about them when people talk about sex, music or even sex scenes in movies. Everyone talks about how amazing it is, So then it makes me think back to my past experiences and it makes me feel down
>>18348293
And if it's a good time it will replace those other times
>>18348297
I just don't think it will be positive
>>18348301
Then shut up and don't fucking go.
>>18348306
yeah, I think I'll just tell her I'm going to book a hostel in her town
You're never going to have positive experiences if you let these whatifs stop you.
>what if X is actually a bad experience in hindsight?
always knowing what to expect of life is a boring way to live
you don't have to have sex, but don't avoid situations just because they involve an unknown--learning to respond is how you grow as a person
>>18348348
But why would you continue to do something if all it does it become bad memories?