What now?

>>18347350


>What happens now?

That's like asking what happens after you bury your dead dog. Nothing. Its dead. It's buried. Time to move on.

>What can I do?

Talk to other girls. Go kayaking. Buy a book. Pay hookers to lick mustard off of your balls. Literally anything other than pointlessly rehash the last 5 years over and over again in your head and on the internet.

>>18347350
FIVE YEARS ??????
Holy fuck OP, she strung you along for five years ?
She's a monster and you're clearly mentally ill
>What can I do ?
Go to therapy to fix yourself

Take some alone time...

PUA is a scam and you might feel empty for a while, but there are literally thousands of things you could be doing for enjoyment, so even the fraction you might be able to afford atm is still pretty big.

You might experience some depression, but it's important to not give in to it. Force yourself to do things, because you want to be well and happy.

>>18347363

I know something is wrong with me. I have a really hard time letting things go. She was the first girl I had ever asked out. She was perfect for me.

I don't know what happened. Probably won't ever meet another girl like her. I have been on okcupid for 3 years now and still no date. I am too old just spontaeneously meet women now.

What the fuck do I even do? I feel lost and I am suddenly regretting deleting her number?

Hang in there OP, you're not the only one. I deleted mine after about six years, though that included a two-year silent period. I was 27 as well. Also couldn't flirt and am not into PUA shit. A bunch of shit that was going on in my life simultaneously helped me immensely, and in fact probably pushed me to cut her off.

1. I spent the summer in San Francisco. I literally just rented an apartment for June and July and spent the summer meeting people and exploring. I got on Meetup and tried a few groups until I found one with people I clicked with (unsurprisingly they were all about 20 years older than me). The group leader kind of took me under her wing (mostly because I had a DSLR and posted my pics on the group page). We all drove up to Napa Valley one day. It was so much fun.
2. I started law school. My experiences in San Francisco had taught me to talk more, go to more new places, and in general just to have more fun. I went out to the bars with my new classmates and developed a reputation as "the guy with the camera." Everyone paid attention to me, and it got to be fun.
3. I occupied myself with other things. Law school was a ton of work, but I kept up with other creative shit. In my second year, I shot a fake "30-for-30" documentary with my classmates, cut it together and edited it, and threw it on YouTube. We had a blast and even got mentioned on a couple of the most prominent law school blogs.

In general, social success is what best heals social failure. And this includes romantic failure. You don't strictly need romantic success to counter romantic failure, however. Just go out there and have fun. I know it's hard, but it's worth it. It's like working out. It's hard as hell at first but once you find something that works and get in your zone, you just keep it up.

>>18347399
(continued)
Also, for flirting, it just fucking clicked one day. I met a girl that essentially begged to be flirted to and who I didn't give a fuck about embarrassing myself with.

After fooling around with her and dumping her, I actually went and plied my newfound skills on Tinder. I had little success at first, but then I started improving. It's all about experience. You have to keep moving.

That's all it is, OP. Movement. You can move forward or you can sit still.

>>18347410

I understand what you are saying but I Feel like different factors are at work here.

My issue is that I don't even get a chance. I can't just up and take a vacation some place. I basically just need a chance from a woman. I feel as if I am always at the mercy of others. I can't do anything without them basically "allowing" me if that makes any sense.

For example, online dating. You can't do jack shit unless the girl likes you back in the first place. I have found that it really doesn't matter what you say in your first message.

I don't know anymore. I feel really confused now.

>>18347399
(continued again; something I forgot)

Also, in the lead-up to law school, virtually everyone already fucking knew me. Why? Because I got into the entering class's Facebook group early and added every single person in the group as a friend. Systematically. Surprise: The vast majority accepted without questioning it. A few were like "Uh who are you?", to whom I responded "Hi I'm just part of the entering class! Wanted to add my classmates! Sorry if that bothered you!" Most were like "Oh okay! Just checking!" and then accepted me.

It was the most fucked up thing having people know me and like me. I had been so quiet, such a loner in undergrad and before. But before I knew it, I was actually excited for the weekend. I went out every Thursday with my classmates to the bars, which I did by just randomly texting some classmates (usually girls) and being like "Hey, where's everyone going to the bars tonight?!" And it works.

Oh, and here's the kicker, while applying to law school had been a goal for a good year by then, the whole decision to go to San Francisco came immediately after a huge fight with the girl I was chasing, after SHE blocked ME. I did it on a whim and haven't looked back once.

It's literally just moving forward and trying new things.

You're too old at 27 ??
My uncle is almost 50 and has a different gf every 2 months, some of them are barely 30 years old lol.

I'm 26, used to think like you, that I missed my shot, but now fuck it feels good to be able to enjoy the things I like to do as a single.

I met a 24 yo girl at a bar not long ago, bf, live together, work, never had her own place or been alone. Dude she had no self confidence, she was sad as fuck.

Be happy you're single and can spend time improving yourself, cause some just get into relationship to fill a void they will realise is still there after 20 years denying it. Realise they had one life and did crap with it cause they spent their time being afraid.

Don't be afraid, follow my advice : FORGET WOMEN. Focus on yourself, on improving yourself and you will be totally fine. That girl filled a void in you, the need to have someone in your life to think about and shit... think about YOU now.

In 2 years you might even look behind telling yourself how of a beta you used to be while you're fingering that pretty Brazilian tourist.

You're lucky, trust me. You have no idea. Congratulations on deleting her, what you did was brave as fuck, good changes are coming, keep going.

>>18347418
>I Feel like different factors are at work here.

Anon, prior to this change in me, I'd never been on a date in my life, never gone out to the bars with friends, never held hands with a girl, and certainly never gotten a "chance" with a girl. I was a loner and stuck to the same girls I'd fallen for over a long, long period of time. I repeated the same mistake you made at least four times in my 20s.

Then I grew out of it.

>I can't just up and take a vacation some place.
I'm not saying you need to do that. I'm saying you need to find a way to meet new people. You could go to meetups in your city. You could do any fucking thing, but you have to fucking do it.

>I basically just need a chance from a woman.
The more you say shit like that the more you'll draw inwards. You need to take responsibility for yourself and your mood.

>>18347436
>Congratulations on deleting her, what you did was brave as fuck, good changes are coming, keep going.

This this this this this! I can't tell you how many times I vacillated and moaned about deleting some girl. The few times I have pulled the trigger, I regretted it initially, but now that I've had this awakening in me, I look back on those past years and just shake my head.

OP, deleting her was you taking action. It's you rejecting and refusing the mindset you describe here:
>>18347418
>I feel as if I am always at the mercy of others. I can't do anything without them basically "allowing" me if that makes any sense.

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So you chased her for 5 years, did you try anything with her? because thats a lot of years of just "chasing her" fuck man...

Im 21, and I did the same as you in February, long story short, met a girl 2 years ago, we started playing around, there was interest in both parties, but my problems and theirs got weird and the thing got unstable, in February she told me something that made my problems even worse, so I basically stopped talking to her, she took it very bad and friends are telling to to just ignore her because she is mad as fuck now.

Yes, its true, Im not gonna lie, it was nice while it lasted, it helped me a lot, but also burned me a lot, it didn't help that she was the only girl to ever love me back so I also had oneitis.

But... a lot of things have changed, listen to:
>>18347436
and do it, just forget about women, its now time to think about you, yourself, to improve and shit, another girl will come, but now is YOUR time to improve as a person

that void only exists if you look at it, dude, that is what I learned of it.

>>18347454
>that void exist only if you look at it

Such a level of wisdom.
I agree even though I'd say it's good to look at it to be aware of it cause it is often related to some inner insecurity but being conscious of it makes it easier to deal with it.

>>18347473
but by being actively conscious of it you are in risk of entering in a loop of self-pity

Yeah, you need to acknowledge, you just can't ignore it, but you can't also focus your entire life on it, because like I said, loop of self-pity and bad feels in general

One day you will be happy because yourself, because your OWN actions, having a person that loves you in your life is amazing yeah, but that is something that you don't actually control by yourself, its a 50% thing, you can be handsome, you can have pure love for her, be rich as hell, but if she doesn't love you...you can't make her love you back.

However, you are in total control of your decisions, your life, so OP, like I and the rest of the people here said, focus on you, you are still young, focus on the things that you love, and some day, outta nowhere, you will find someone.

>>18347499
I agree with you.
OP got some pretty good advices here, hope he will find his way.

>>18347350
>Breaks up by cutting contact

Fuck you.
Its too late and I'm being 100% serious when I say you should feel bad.
Don't ever do this bullshit again.

>>18347513
Why

>>18347350
>I'm 27
I'm a 29 year old VIRGIN. And I'm not even unattractive or completely incapable of communication, which means there's something horribly wrong with me.
So you can just fuck right off.

>>18347515
He means if you had broken up with a gf by cutting contact, not dropping a fucking girl that friendzoned you.

>>18347521
I honestly just want to die now (not really).
I have fulfilled the archetypical stereotype of my demographic and hate myself every day.
There is no difference if I have sex now or later; I am "like 30" and if I'm ever honest with a girl about that, she'll be completely repulsed.

Why do people come to /adv/ for this shit? Go see a therapist. Jesus christ.

>>18347515
>>18347527
Yeah I guess I misread.

>>18347531

It's a big pissing contest for most of them.

>>18347513
would you rather have the guy just slowly get destroyed on the inside, year after year?

Yeah, it sucks for both parties, but there are some things that can't just be fixed by talking

I do agree that its better to break up in a friendly manner, but sometimes..-there is just too much shit to fix.

If we are talking about what >>18347527 said, if its just some friendzone bullshit just forget about it