Anyone have serious questions for someone in a wheelchair?

How difficult is it to hang out with friends? I live in suburban environment which contains maaany stairs and uneven concrete.

If you do hang out with friends, is it bothersome to catch a ride? I'm to understand you need someone willing to drive you to places in a vehicle with handicap accommodations?

>>18313893
It's a pain. I can't do a bunch of stairs but I can get up one or two on good days, unsafely and painfully. Some towns have standards for "visitability," which means houses need to be accessible just so anyone who can't do steps can get in to any given house (ie have friends and family) and use a bathroom there, but mine doesn't.

So some of my friends I have to park my chair outside, crawl or stagger in, and have limited movement inside the house. If I were 100% nonambulatory I'd be fucked.

Luckily my partner lives in a house that's mostly accessible.

As for vehicles, it's mostly bus, but I actually just "walk" across town if it's very late. Uber has services with lift/ramp-equipped vehicles, but not in my area, and there's no accessible taxis here either. I'm hopefully moving somewhere with better access next year. If not, I really need to look into a folding power chair, or a manual with power assist, so I can toss it in the back of a regular car.

Do you know many people who also need wheelchairs?

Why do you need one? If it was something that changed, how was dealing with it?

>>18313965
>Do you know many people who also need wheelchairs?
Actually, yeah, but it weirdly predates all this. One of my exes uses a wheelchair for muscular dystrophy and she worked in an organization that was disabled people providing support services for other disabled people. At the time my only known issue was depression/anxiety and I didn't really see myself as disabled, but she convinced me to hang out and volunteer at a few events at her center a few times and I made a bunch of physically disabled friends.

>Why do you need one? If it was something that changed, how was dealing with it?
I got diagnosed with a few shitty health problems that had been getting steadily worse for years. It had to get pretty bad before I (or anyone else) thought it was anything more than mental health probs and got tested.

The issues a wheelchair solves: rapid heart rate upon standing that can cause me to pass out at worst and feel panicky at best, pain in my leg and hip joints, easy for me to injure myself when walking, fatigue.

The actual health conditions: Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, lupus, and some subsidiary problems of those. EDS is hereditary and my mom also has chronic pain and fatigue and injures herself all the time, but I think it's the combo that's really fucking me up.

Being in a wheelchair is a double-edged sword, really. It made social stuff miserable because people are terrified of me or rude most of the time, but before then it had gotten to the point where I was so tired and hurty I had one good trip in me in a week and I was peeing in jars next to the bed because I couldn't get to the bathroom right away when I got up. I live like a normal person now and handle all my own stuff.

how do you go to the toilett? can you stand up or do you have to have someone help you?
same with having sex. can you get to the bed on your own or does your partner have to help you?

Do you have a lesser appetite than people who are not in a wheelchair?

>>18314012
This stuff is specific to me, but

>how do you go to the toilett? can you stand up or do you have to have someone help you?
I can stand but usually I transfer sitting (like a hop or a dive) because there's nothing grosser than passing out in a public bathroom

>same with having sex. can you get to the bed on your own or does your partner have to help you?
My partner sleeps on a floor futon so I guess I just "fall"/hop down into it? I don't need help though.

My legs and arms work--they just hurt to use and I have to be careful, plus standing isn't very safe.

>>18314015
I don't know? I don't think so, lol. I have GI issues from EDS and taking opioids gives me more, so I eat many small meals, I guess.

>>18313880
Male or female?

How difficult is dating? Sometimes I wonder how difficult it must be to date, especially since I assume that they'll assume they're being dated out of pity.

>>18314036
>Male or female?
Transsexual. Vagina and look like a guy. I had chest surgery and I'd been on testosterone for eight years, but I had to stop recently. I usually date guys but the ex with MD I mentioned and my current partner are exceptions.

>How difficult is dating? Sometimes I wonder how difficult it must be to date, especially since I assume that they'll assume they're being dated out of pity.
I started using a chair a few years ago, and I'd already been with my girlfriend a few years. I don't know if the dating scene is hard or not. I mean, I thought it would be hard as a trans guy when I was younger, but it actually wasn't so bad.