Can Exes Be Friends?

>>18309124
No.
Don't listen to people saying so.

I am

>>18309124
No. They'll stalk you on 4chan and threaten you on /adv/. Get revenge and move on.

>>18309124
everytime i've tried this, it just ends up in us falling for each other again than proceeding to have another falling out; this time, however, you'll hate each other.

>>18309124
Yeah but not really
I kinda depends. If you both dated for not too long and neither of you were emotionally invested, then yeah. If you were good friends who started dating but had a mutual understanding that it probably wasn't the best idea, also yeah. Will you be as close as you once were? Prob not, but still good friends nonetheless.
Anything other than those situations is a no. But then again it still depends on the people involved.

>>18309131
Do you mind sharing your experience? Did you have a rather long and serious relationship before?

Of course.

The longer and more intimate the romantic relationship, the harder it is to be friends afterwards, but whoever says it's not possible probably has never actually *been* in a relationship.

No, definitely not.
People telling you otherwise are bullshitting you and bullshitting themselves as well.

ppl who were togather because they didnt want to be alone and the breakup was mutual (almost never)

>>18309124
Yes. We were married for over a decade, went through some rough time and the breakup was mutual. No lawyers involved in the divorce.
We still talk and it's kind of like therapy for us.

>>18309141
During highschool I got a message from a girl through facebook
>hey cutie ect ect
We get together but I didn't feel much attraction except big diddies
>we go to homecoming dance
>her friend is 6x hotter
Dump this girl with hard hitting words like I just wanted to entertain you
>next year we have a class together and I just make jokes until she's comfortable being around me again

So yeah just try and diffuse the situation with a good time

>>18309124
Unless it was a slow, natural fizzling out equal on both sides nope.
No way in hell

>>18309124

Probably not close friends, but it's not difficult to be on good terms. I have plenty of mutual friends with my ex, so we meet regularly and being friendly has never been an issue.

>>18309148
>ppl who were togather because they didnt want to be alone and the breakup was mutual
This, Im still friends with 2 exs, one of which was a 4 year ex-fiance.

>>18309148
Pretty much this.

Met a girl when we were 20. Lasted five years, living together, moving abroad together, broke up for a year but ended up living together in a collective with my best friend. Basically little to no sex the last four years though. We broke up at 25, and it was mutual, although I still longed for her for about a year before I got over her (met someone else.) About 9 months after the breakup she reached out because she didn't have that many close friends left and I knew her like no other. I caved and started supporting her emotionally. This was seven years ago. We are still friends, sometimes hanging out often, other times only a few times a year. I don't have romantic feelings for her anymore, but it was hard in the beginning. She feels more like my sister now than anything. She's been married to a lesbian lady for about two years. I was there the night they met, (we went together, platonically,) at a Halloween party in 2010. Three days ago she asked if I wanted to have coffee during the weekend.

But I guess few can relate.

>>18309124

No. Wanting to be friends with your own used trash is an attempt at self sabotage for future relationships.

>>18309124
I'm friends with an ex but we were friends for a long time before dating and it took a while to be good friends again afterwards.

>>18309495
Same. Anyone who says it's impossible is just one of those "well it didn't work for me therefore it can't work for anyone" idiots. Is it likely to work? In most cases no, but it works just fine for me. Childhood friends, dated for a while, she was my first love and the break up was actually anything but nice and smooth, but eventually we talked it out and agreed that we don't want to lose the friendship. We're not as close as before, of course, but it's been several years since then and there are no hard feelings. We're good buddies, no problems.

>>18309124
Yes but it depends on the person.

I am friends with all of my exes. I didn't have messy breakups with any of them, and I was the one who ended the relationship in all cases.

You cannot be friends while they still like you, even if you are emotionally over them. It's good to be clear and say "I'd really like to stay friends, but we both need some time to be separate before we pursue a friendship. Once we've both completely moved on we'lol see how things are."

Many of my exs have not completely gotten over me and I'm not sure if they ever will. I keep those people somewhat distant for their own good.

>>18309124
I want to find out what happened to my ex

Fuck no. I got better people to spend my time on now.

>>18309124
Other people's exes can be your friends

>>18309124
Depends on how well, or mutual the agreement was to begin with. If by friends you mean "back to the way it was", it will always be awkward initially, but definitely possible. The key is no lingering underlying feelings, that's when it goes south.

>>18309124
How weird it sounds my ex is one of my closest friends.
First love and long term relationship, we grew up together, and before the actual break up we got through a very depressing period of time. The break up felt like we finally put an end to all that shit. We both felt much better. We spent some time apart ofc, but after that we felt totally comfortable in being friends.
One year since then and we're friends still, we talk about each other's crushes even and what we have now is 100x better of what our relationship was by the end of it. We both know that, so we are grateful to each other to have let it go.
We spent the adolescence together and I guess this is the reason, since I wouldn't even want to try to be friends with my other ex bf.

I was never physically attracted to my ex but I convinced myself that I could learn to, because everything about her personality was just awesome. In the early days I was barely physical and after the third date she had to ask me if we were friends or anything more, so of course I told her I liked her and then we were together for 8 months in which we never had sex and kissing felt awkward and souless every time. But we'd chat and laugh for hours at a time.

Looking back, it really does make me think that we were just supposed to be good friends. I hope maybe we can be, but it's probably too late.

>>18309132
You're a retarded twat.

I've been separated from my ex for 2 years now. We talked last night for the first time in like 4 or 5 months. Felt very natural. Had fun talking. Felt attraction. However it did not feel like a friend, and unresolved feelings were still there, and maybe always will be. I don't think we could be just friends after 6 years together. Maybe it's also cause I'm single and maybe enough time hasn't passed yet.

In some cases yes. Most of the time it's better not to try it though.

I'd say it's rare, but can happen.

For example, I'm friends with my first girlfriend from high school... But I'm 30 now. It was like a lifetime ago. We're not the same people we were and have gone our separate ways, but still chat from time to time.

Another ex I'm friends with because our breakup was mutual. Both of us weren't feeling it, and both of us had met someone else (even if we weren't ready to admit we had "met" our new people, we both started dating that awesome new person in our lives we were telling each other about after the relationship ended). Because she was religious, and I wasn't, things were doomed from the start and we were better off as friends.

But I'd rather never see any of my exes again outside of those two.

Yes.

If you don't see each other that often.

The kind of friends that meet once every couple of weeks. More than once every 2 weeks is too much, sometimes you won't meet for 8-10 weeks or more cause you're busy.

So yes, if you keep your distance. You can't be close friends that meet often.

>>18309148
this

i broke up with my ex gf of 1.5 years and she was devastated
unfortunately we're part of the same friend group and i cant avoid hanging out with her when im back from uni
i have found it completely fine because i dont have any feelings for her
she however has approached me to say shes finding it really hard

its basically its simply a question of whether or not you still have feelings
also it can be ok for one person and not the other

>>18309124
If the executioner is legal run by the country's prison system, why not. He won't just randomly nab and kill you.

Lol this thread

Yes, because
>expnanations
>firsthand experience
>plausible reasoning
>>>Literal proof

No, because
>People are horrible
>All above are liars
>because