I need advice on how to deal with someone who gives bullshit

My boyfriend is like this. I just don't ask him anything anymore and have emotionally distanced myself from him.

>>18308836
10/10 made laugh because of monogamy

>>18308836
Jesus dude that's not good. I don't want to end up in a situation like that. I might have to for my own sanity but then what's the point of being together at all?

Is he like that with you or everyone?

>>18308848
I don't get it

>>18308849
I don't know either but it's like, at a certain point you realize you are not going to change another person so the only thing you can do is worry about yourself. It was making me feel bad when he did this so I just stopped creating situations where I knew he would. The only thing you can do is point it out to him and try to have an honest talk about it. But I think you know how that will go. Prepare to struggle.

>>18308881
Thanks for your kind words. I'm in a super dark place right now.

Things are bad. I'm hitting a breaking point. I can't just detach and deal with it- it's not an ok thing for a person to do... to just bullshit constantly. It's as if they're unable to just STOP. I guess I was hoping for some magical phrase. But it doesn't exist...

>>18308891
You must talk to him, that's really the only thing you can do. It's a change that has to happen between the two of you. Tell him how important this is. It's damaging your relationship. He NEEDS to communicate with you about it. Just make your best effort, anon. You've got to.

>>18308896
I have man. That's the thing. I'm not the type to be upset by something and not lay it all out on the table.

I don't like threatening breaking up with someone, and this seems small, but it's not. It feels like a basic lack of respect and it breaks trust and that's a big deal.

But when confronted with the bullshitting, there's usually bullshitting/dodging/deflecting about that. It's like I can't get anywhere. Small issues turn into huge ones because of all the attempts to skirt around it.

>>18308826
>>18308836
Why the fuck would you date people like that?

>>18308906
>But when confronted with the bullshitting, there's usually bullshitting/dodging/deflecting about that.
Yeah this is why I said it's a struggle. You may have to get really nasty in order to get through to him. Do not let him off the hook so easily. Do not let him "skirt around," stay on topic and call him out EVERY time he makes an attempt to change the topic. You may have tried before but you need to change your technique because evidently it wasn't effective.

I'm talking from experience anon. I'm a really nice, sweet, empathetic person and that's the approach I take to dealing with problems, but it just doesn't work for some people. You have to be harsh and a hardass to make them see the light. Get in his face with irrefutable evidence, examples of him doing this, do anything you can to at least get him to ADMIT what he's doing. If he can at least acknowledge it's a problem then you can work together from there. That'll be the hardest part I think.

>>18308910
You don't find these kind of traits out until later anon. But everyone has their shitty traits it's worth trying to work it out before you just dump someone and move on to the next person who will be just as fucked up but in a different way.

>>18308911
This is how our fights escalate. Me pushing the issue. But in the end nothing feels accomplished. I'm really heartbroken dude I can express how much the fact I'm not alone means to me.
Suddenly the subject is attempted to be changed to that time I stormed out, or someone has a heacahe they can't talk or they're going to have a panic attack and they're too tired to talk. I can't take it.

>>18308913
I agree. It's not something that was super evident. It's a defense mechanism that I should be above having it used on me. It's been long enough I've proven myself a friend and not foe, and I deserve to be talked to straight.