What about me makes me invisible to woman on online dating sites

Group shots are bad, and your face is kind of unattractive. But you shouldn't give up hope.

>>18292815
>Am I too ugly

You put this first, so you already know the answer in your heart. Online dating isn't available to guys like us, you need to focus on real life.

>>18292815
There's nothing wrong with you, but you used really bad pictures for a dating site.

>>18292815

Top right and bottom right are OK.

>>18292815

Also, smile with your eyes. That is the trick to faking a smile.

>>18293152
>Also, smile with your eyes. That is the trick to faking a smile.

How do you do that? I can't even smile with my mouth naturally

>>18293149

This, except I would say all three on the right side are OK. The shot in the upper right is the best one, because it feels natural and it genuinely looks like you're having fun and enjoying yourself.

>>18293183
You can, you just don't know how. Practice in a mirror. Squint your eyes a bit when you smile if it doesn't come naturally. People like teeth and seeing your eyes move when you smile, that's just undeniable.

yeah, you're pretty ugly. sorry to be so blunt.
focus on irl where you can soften the blow with personality.

>>18293241
>focus on irl where you can soften the blow with personality.

guess I am just straight fucked then since my personality is even worse then my looks

>>18292815
Your bio needs some work, its a little too long and goes into unnecessary detail like that eye thing.

>>18292815
You're 33, thats quite old for OKcupid in particular, it's mostly full of dysfunctional 20 somethings.

You aren't the most attractive guy out there, lets just say you have a distinct and unique face.

>>18294080
>My OKCupid personality trait says that I am “old fashioned”. I don't think I agree with that. To me that phrase has a lot of negative connotations that I don't want to be associated with.
Cut this bit out and just start with
>"It says im old fashioned but I would say I am private, reserved, and generally trying to be respectful of everybody.
>I don’t like loud, crazy parties and would rather just be hang out at a coffee shop, small bar or park with a tight group of friends.
Alter this to being more about how you're comfortable on your own and doing your own thing, not how you don't like traditionally fun things.

>I am currently working in IT but I was previously trying to get into publishing and journalism. Who’s to say if I’ll go through another career change later in life?
You just wrote about how you're a failure. Change it to something like "I'm currently working in IT but i love media and politics and i'm training to be a journalist". Women like men who have aspirations.

>Family is important.
Maybe a little offputting, you dont want a woman thinking you'll pounce on them with a giant family on the first date.

>So are nature, art, science and the free time needed to enjoy them.
Switch this to some bullshit about how you love science and nature and list some places you've been

>>18294093
>I've got a bit of a deformaty on my left eyelid that prevents me from completely closing that eye by itself so I end up squinting or closing my eyes a lot. Not sure why I felt the need to mention that
Cut this shit out entirely, why the fuck are you shouting outloud about being a deformed. This should only come up in conversation and as a self-dig like "haha yea my eyes are so fucking wonky i look like quasimodo!". Self insults when performed properly are attractive.

>Not entirely sure what I want out of a relationship. I know I want something with respect and friendship as much as I want romance. I don’t believe in putting anyone on a pedestal; respect is first and foremost.
Alright dad. You need to change this to saying what you want out of a relationship, not that you don't know, indecisive bullshit is ugly. You already listed you like respect so "I want a woman who can keep up with me and we can respect each other" something like that.

Your profile is an advert but all you're doing it discouraging people currently.

>>18292815
You look pretty average. If I saw you on the street I wouldn't think you are ugly. Personally I would say get rid of the beard. It makes you look way older and plus it looks like you have a decent jawline. Also take the advice others gave you about your bio and pics.
I think a reason that you don't get too many responses is that for some reason you give off a Mexican cartel vibe especially on your okc.

>>18294397
>Personally I would say get rid of the beard.

Already did. And whenever I show people pictures of myself without the beard on one of these kinds of threads I get responses to grow a beard. I mean which is it what the fuck

No offense but why do you have a photo with a girl on a dating site? I've never been to a dating site so I have no clue but wouldn't it be better to appear alone in all photos? I mean that's what I assume from my ignorance.

>>18294515
Because I am also with my other male cousin in said photo and because I want to give the illusion that I am not an anti-social fucktard that spends most of his time alone

>>18294093
>>18294100
Any input on what I have on the "message me" second? I know I am being passive aggressive but I figure it's not like I am getting any attention anyway so what fucking ever

>>18294584
If you're interested

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>>18294584
You can't simultaneously ask for help sprucing up your profile and then be all defeatist about it. The gender norms comment makes you seem like a fedora-wearing MRA and helps to destroy any credibility the rest of your profile built around you.

>>18294594
If you can't find up with anything clever that isn't smarmy and doesn't sound like it came from an article on Return of Kings, then keep it simple. This anon has it right.

>>18294626
>If you can't find up with anything clever that isn't smarmy and doesn't sound like it came from an article on Return of Kings

What does Lord of the Rings have to do with anything

>>18292815
Youre not ugly but some photos of you are bad. The one where you hang and smile is good because it emits "fun". Photos like your profile pic dont emit this vibe. Also the lighting in that photo is bad. I know why you have the group photo but its bad because it doesnt emit "fun" and youre not in the center. Dont get me wrong, an attractive guy could get away with all but average looking guys like us have to use all the bonus points we can get. Also have a photo with a dog.

>>18294725
>Also have a photo with a dog.

Are cats acceptable? Or will I look like a literal pussy

Sorry to be blunt OP but you are ugly. You sound like a cool guy to hangout with but as a girl I wouldn't date you.

>>18294755
How shallow...

>>18294756
Really sorry but that is the truth. I rather not lead anyone on either.

Why aren't you dating the girl from the first photo?

>>18294755
>>18294758
Im a guy and I agree, but the best way for OP to get a woman is to be charming irl. I did however read that he considers his personality worse than his looks, but that might be just because he lacks confidence.

>>18294781
It must be his cousin. Her and the other guy must be siblings

Unattractive. Try plastic surgery and losing weight.

>>18294758
This is not a reason not to date him. This is why I called you shallow, not for stating the truth.

>>18292815
No offence but in the first one you look like a legit orc from Lord of the Rings

>>18294802
Except being unattractive is a perfectly valid reason to NOT date someone. It's shallow, sure, but it's also truthful.
You really think this guy is getting any woman's panties wet right now? Like do you genuinely fucking believe that, based on his face and the lifeless descriptions of himself?

>>18294802
Looks are a dealbreaker for many women. Right now OP has done nothing to charm the femanon so of course she says that. And women dont like insecure guys like OP. I guarantee if OP gets confident the pussy will come...

>>18294812
Description is shit and is a legit reason, but to weed people out because of their looks is a a negative character trait indeed, no wise person ever does that, it is very childish and not attractive.

> 5'6"

Found your problem. Sorry man online dating just isn't going to work for you. Try meeting girls in real life where they might be able to overlook your defect.

>>18294817
>but to weed people out because of their looks is a a negative character trait indeed
Maybe to you, but relationships are built upon physical attraction. If I'm not attracted to you, it doesn't matter what your personality is like nor how rich you are. I think you're the childish one here, seeing how entitled you are.

>>18292815
>It says I'm old fashioned
Jeez, that's now how you sell yourself.

>I am currently working in IT but I have a passion for media and journalism
Here you could add more details.

>I don’t believe in putting anyone on a pedestal; respect is first and foremost.
Unnecessary filler.

>I’m really good at
More. Something related to dating and your attractive qualities.

>Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
If you HAVE to list this shit, try limiting it to 3 entries per category. Being more vague like you did with anime sounds better too.

>Is it really possible to have privacy in a world filled social media?
Dumb question since you don't have to sign up. Replace it with something related to your attractive qualities.

>How to take better care of myself.
Would make me think that you're not doing it already, which might be honest but not necessary a positive statement.

As for your looks, well you don't look like a guy chicks would masturbate about after meeting but not ugly enough to make it a huge con either.

>>18294812
He would if he were for example a badass guitar player or bass player, maybe wearing sunglasses. Also if he builds up a rep irl as being a badass cool guy that also is fun to hang around with and can provide good advice. Maybe I'm just letting my imagination go wild judging a few photos but OP looks like he would look hot if i he were a cool musician or artist of some kind.

>>18294817
I'm another anon and I think I disagree with you, what's the point of looking for a relationship with someone you don't find attractive?
Though I think attractiveness has more to do with style than with natural beauty, personally. There's a bunch of girls in my town with weird faces but excellent fashion styles. I think they look better than naturally pretty girls that have no good sense of style or no personality at first sight.

>>18294828
>He would if he were for example a badass guitar player or bass player, maybe wearing sunglasses
Well maybe, but obviously that's not the case right now. What OP could be doing right now, however, is learning how to dress well, lose weight, and invest in plastic surgery to maximize his dating potential.

>>18294841
I'd replace "invest in plastic surgery" with "learn how to play a musical instrument or some other artistic skill"

>>18292815
>ages 25‑33
>while being 33
Uhh oh.

>>18294846
What do you mean? I'm 25 but I imagine myself wanting to date anyone 20 and up when I'm 30. Don't people say that age differences are not important when you are like... over 20 and under 40?

>>18294846
Whats the problem?

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>5'6"

Found the problem.

>>18294848
What, didn't your profile say your 33?

>>18294852
You are retarded, sir.

>>18294852
I'm not OP, I'm just wondering about what you posted

>>18292815
Reasons that I haven't seen posted yet:

You're brown but not one of the sexy kinds of brown.
IT is not a "sexy" job (I work in IT too, so I know this well). Say that you're a network/systems engineer or something - unless you're a helpdesk cuck and then just say that you work in "tech".
You're in your 30s and publicly say that you still like anime and comics. It's fine to like them but don't put that shit on a dating profile.
You come off as a bitch and reek of low self esteem. Too much explaining yourself ('it says I'm this but I'm not really' or 'i don't really like X :(' ).

Does the other guy on the first photo have a girlfriend?

>>18294859
This.

>>18294849
Being willing to date with age down but not up from your own age is quite the redflag. Why is a 33 year old man okay with 25 girls but not okay with women who are 34-36?

>>18294827
>>It says I'm old fashioned
>Jeez, that's now how you sell yourself.

That's what the personality trait thing says is my top quality. I don't bevel that, which is why I wrote it

nigga stop making these threads

>>18294867
Ah got it. Yeah that makes sense.

>>18294872
I'm not on OKCupid so I don't know but does the site like... calculate traits about yourself and force you to post them or something?

>>18294867
The age range is probably the only confident thing that OP has done so far. Lets not take it away.

>>18294867
Not OP and I agree with your point, but come on. Who in their right mind wants some old and busted women in her mid-30s when you could have some primo mid-20s pussy instead?

you still haven't fixed the grammar problems i pointed out in the last fucking thread

>>18294877
Doubt it was a conscious choice, besides then he might as well go lower. Acting confident only works if you can back it up with something, otherwise it plays against you. Take the usual r9k virgin expecting a hot waifu, it comes of as deluded, not confident.

>>18294878
Beggars, choosers and all that. It's perfectly normal to want younger girls but by being so open about it, you send obvious signals and that can only work if the rest would make them overlook it. It's likely to be a turn off even for the girls in the age range.

>>18294884
Sorry, I just wanted to change the whole profile first with your feedback.

>>18294867
Its just that I always feel intimitated by older women. And I never had a below 20s girlfriend and just thought this is the last opportunity for me. I can change it to something else if its the problem.

You're not even that ugly you just give of a weird vibe to me

>>18294891
>Beggars, choosers and all that.

If my only choice is over-30, then back to anime land I go.

Good relationship > no relationship > bad relationship.

>>18294864
Im not sure I am much older than them.

>>18294859
Thank you for this feedback. I think I will rewrite the profile and put the age range to all ages. Can I take photos to look like a sexy brown?

I can see the depression in all your pics. Not a good signal to the whores on tinder

>>18294925
>Can I take photos to look like a sexy brown?
Not really. Hispanic is definitely in the bottom tier of "brown". If you're looking for a white girl you're going to have a tough time.

>>18294876
>I'm not on OKCupid so I don't know but does the site like... calculate traits about yourself and force you to post them or something?

You have a bunch of questions that you can answer. Based on how you respond you get personality traits and a percent match with other user.

I would just give up on OKcupid all together, it isn't going to work for a guy like you, its not even you being bad its just its online, there will always be someone better.

Join some classes that women go to or something.

>>18292815
You look like an ape, but I've seen a lot worse, so you really shouldn't have too much problems with that

>>18294940
>Hispanic
What kind?

If it's any place other than Venezuela or Mexico, OP could identify as his ancestry. If it's one of those two countries, just go to community colleges in SoCal and try your luck in person. If you got a job and a clean record then you'll be above-average where I'm at.

PS: don't use this place for bros, we got a lot of substance problems with the boys over here.

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>>18292815
You could always just buy some plastic surgery.
The surgeons will even tell you what makes you ugliest.

I doubt an ugly face is everything though.
You can easily make up for this with a good personality.

>>18294884
Which ones?

>>18295081
>you can easily make up for this with a good personality
This is not especially true online. I might be a bit biased, but my personal anecdotes have showed me that women fall in love with my face before anything else. I've been told I'm the cuter one among other similar looking guys, that I'm pretty good looking and am allowed to be picky, or that I shouldn't die alone because of how my face looks. I always feel kinda taken aback by these comments because they come from all sorts of people, of all ages and walks of life. You would think everyone is shallow if you heard this all the time, thankfully I only hear it some of the time however.

>>18295274
Women can fall in love with a baby face or a bulldog face or a gangster face or a Turk face. Different strokes for different folks.

The big invisible variable here is commonly known as 'game.' If you've got it then you've got a lot, if you don't have it then you don't have much. How does one discover the concept of game, let alone get good at it? GO OUTSIDE AND TALK TO PEOPLE! JUST BE GLAD YOU'RE NOT IN A CRUMBLING BANKRUPT TOWN IN THE MIDDLE OF A VAST DESERT WITH SIGNS SAYING "DO NOT PICK UP HITCHHIKERS" LIKE ME!" /whine

>>18294851
Guys can "pull" when short, but they really have to turn up the physical attractiveness and personality frame for it to work. And not every woman goes for short guys no matter what you do, but the same could be said for many other physical or personality traits in dating being dealbreakers to random people. It happens.

>>18295281
While I agree with this for in-person interactions, I really do think that OP should de-prioritize online dating at the least, because it is brutally biased towards the best looking people with the most status.

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>>18292815
>http://www.okcupid.com/profile/notasandvich
You are wasting your most valuable section - "Message me if"

The "message me if" section is an invite. Check out ongoings in your area. Meetups, movies, festivals, whatever. List where you are going - where a woman can meet you. Then go there.

When you are there, walk up to a single woman and ask her to take your picture for your dating profile. If you like her, thank her and offer her coffee in payment. It's a great ice breaker.

Guys do not do well on dating sites. Free dating sites are 85% guys, 15% women. You have to write something like 100 women to get 1 date.

> I am too beta for anything else at this moment
Fuck the alpha/beta shit. Just try. Every weekend talk to 5 new women. Go places where you can meet new women - the park, the bookstore, the bar, the gym, whatever.

Just talk. Don't try and hook up. Just learn to be friendly. At the end, ask for their number.

If you talk to 100 women, 5 a week, this way, I all but guarantee that you will find SOMEONE willing to date.

It's a lot of work, yes, but it's what you have to do to find a date. Are you willing to do it, or are you just going to waste our fucking time whining on /adv/?

>>18292815
Online dating is mainly about appearances, offline dating personalities.

If your ugly your do better offline.

>>18292815
I'm a very attractive guy and I still don't get talked to on those fucking sites either. I think because I'm only 5'10". I'm sure when women see that, they left swipe. Fucking pretentious bitches think they deserve the best. Until of course they are in their late 30's wondering why guys only want to bang, not settle with.

>>18295442
>I think it's because I'm 5' 10"
I wonder about this. I noticed a lot of taller girls used Tinder, I'm talking the 5' 8" and above types. I feel like it probably has to do with them not being willing to date a shorter guy, and thus they turn to online dating to filter out for the tallest men, even the like 10% of the world's population above 6' 0".

>>18295442
If it's tinder, go on the tinder reddit and get them to give you some suggestions on your dating profile. They are a helpful bunch. I did this, took their advice and is did get me more matches that I wanted.

>>18295442
Yeah, it's definitely your height. Got nothing to do with your bitterness at all.

>>18294846
But they don't have a "fetus" option so I have to settle for them 25 year olds

>>18295459
>If it's tinder, go on the tinder reddit and get them to give you some suggestions on your dating profile.

I tried this and all I got was one snide comment that may or may not have suggested I was too ugly.

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>>18294632
If you're serious, it's one of those smug redpill sites.

It's like an angry, vengeful /r9k/