Tiring event with the girlfriend

>>18288589
Maybe connection problems? Like maybe you answer to almost everything but she doesn't hear it and/or maybe it sounds like your answers take a little longer to get to her due lag and it feels to her like you interrupted her? Try some other call program

>>18288598
This. I often have to ask my GF to repeat herself and it annoys the shit out of her. With that said, yours definitely overreacted. Don't overreact back and see if she calms down.

>>18288598
Yeah, I really made this clear to her already. Also does not really explain the other BS to me.

>say to her
That's where you fucked up. Don't argue with women, they run on emotion. If they say shit you don't like, you dismiss it or ignore it.

She's upset about something and without even understanding why your reaction is
>you're upset for no reason
>you are just doing this for the sake of fighting

Basically tells me all I need to know that, yeah you probably do ignore her and interrupt her and are the typical inattentive boyfriend. The problem is never you, it's her, right?

>>18288609
well she did hang up on the guy ffs.
>feminine solidarity.

>>18288610
>well she did hang up on the guy ffs.
she evidently had to because her mom came home. she still followed up with a text so the fact that she hung up is kind of irrelevant.
>feminine solidarity.
hypocrisy

>>18288609
Oh fuck off you white knight. It's not rare for a girl to shit on her guy without telling him why.

>>18288609
I am open to learning what I did wrong and I also say in the greentext that I would like to know what I ignored and that I do not mean it when I interrupt her (mostly caused by skype).

I am not the kind of person to put the blame on my gf, the woman I love, that would be unfair. However, what I do not understand is the shitload of problems that she pours over me out of nowhere. In 1 minute the convo went from normal to avalance of all kinds of problems (most of which are half true). This confuses me even more, because every time I talk to her I try to carefully ask her if she is feeling good, something nasty happened or how she feels in the relationship.

>>18288615
>>18288609
Also, usually when her mother comes home it does not bother her. This because she then goes to her room to talk to me in private 9 out of 10 times.

So hanging up because of her mother is a BS reason.

>>18288623
i'm just saying, if you want this to go well for you, you need to drop this dismissive line of thinking or at least don't say shit like this to her because i guarantee it will make things worse.

it seems like you're not even receptive if you have the attitude that she's just doing it to fuck with you and is upset for literally "no reason."
i mean she just sent you a huge text explaining her problem so you need to take it to heart even if you feel defensive. consider the fact that maybe it's a bunch of little issues she has been putting up with and then this was a breaking point or something that made her "snap"

you even admit what she's saying has some truth in it so, let her air her grievances for now and be just, receptive rather than defensive until you fully understand where she's coming from

that's my advice

i deal with this in my relationship all the time. keeping a cool head and being understanding is the way to go.
>"what is the problem, how can we fix it?"
not
>"i didn't do anything wrong, you have no reason to be upset"

>>18288615
hang on a sec:
this Korean girl is going to live with the guy (perhaps a complete stranger in the flesh) for a year, and yet has to hide the screen from her mother when she gets back? this sounds quite fishy to me.

But your feminine intuition is perhaps beyond my limited male comprehension.

>>18288633
>i deal with this in my relationship all the time. keeping a cool head and being understanding is the way to go.

Man, I completely agree with this, but how do you deal with her thinking it is okay to take advantage and start drama for no reason?

>Inb4 if you think that you should not be in a relationship with her

Nah man, you know that is not reality when it comes to most women.

I also said to her she can share her small things with me so we dont have this large eruptions.

There is a level of self responsiblity that I have to make her aware off; she cannot just start arguments or drama whenever she likes.

>>18288639
No, to clarify she sleeps in the same room as her mother so it will bother her mother if we continue the convo, but see my other post >>18288632

Her mother knows me and met me

>>18288639
she was probably frustrated and used it as an excuse in this case

my point is she took the time to calm down and write a text so it's not like she completely shut down communication

>>18288642
>start drama for no reason?
like i said, you are starting off on the wrong foot by insisting it's "for no reason."
she HAS a reason and you need to try to get to the bottom of it, even if it seems like a silly reason to you, it's not to her. this is how feelings work, they're not objective and obvious you have to get the other person to explain.

and i'm not going to say you shouldn't be in a relationship with her, i'm coming from a place where i can very much relate to you. the thing you have to understand is, even if you agree on a plan of action
>just say something whenever you're bothered, okay?
that's not the way people act in an emotional moment, we naturally want to hide and suppress emotions like anger, or displeasure in order to keep up the appearance of being collected and keeping a pleasant situation. even with your boyfriend/girlfriend it's not easy or comfortable to confront them about stuff like this so if it seems like not a big issue you just kind of justify to yourself that you shouldn't bring it up but just get over it.

so just be understanding of this. i guarantee she didn't WANT to get upset and ruin a nice time, but you can't help it when you get angry about something. you need to give your partner the benefit of the doubt, you can't think of them as being your enemy out to "get you"

>>18288652
>we naturally want to hide and suppress emotions like anger, or displeasure in order to keep up the appearance of being collected and keeping a pleasant situation

This is not me at all. I am Dutch and I my country we mean what we say. No context required. When we are angry, we shout. When we are sad, we cry and when we are happy we laugh. We dont care so much about appreances.

I know where you are coming from. But if she really cares about solving the problem and the general vibe, she would not react so disproportionally and emotional. Also, she said I should just break up with her if I cannot learn to let her finish speaking. This is a over reactive reaction.

That is what I am confused about.

>>18288589
Your long distance girlfriend is a bipolar nutcase. Run anon, run for the hills. Seriously. Normal women don't pull shit like that. Never stick your dick in crazy.

>>18288668
>I am Dutch and I my country we mean what we say.
You *are* aware that this is 180' opposite to Asian culture, right? As well as female mentality (judging from the posts we read on adv etc etc).

I'm afraid for you, OP, you had better start opening better lines of communication or developing psychic powers if you want this to be successful.

>>18288668
she's frustrated because she feels like you don't listen to her and from the way you're talking right now you appear to be blaming her for getting emotional (something you can't control) and using this an excuse to accuse her of not caring so just from extrapolation i bet she has a valid point, because here you are justifying to total strangers why what she says and feels is invalid before you even took the time to really listen and understand her. yeah, that's going to infuriate anyone, especially when it's your boyfriend. it's not confusing at all.

>>18288675
no, just typical Asian female stuff.
though to be fair, it probably is a culture-induced psychosis on a continental scale...