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Anonymous
Staying single after breakup 2017-04-25 12:33:05 Post No. 18257257
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Staying single after breakup 2017-04-25 12:33:05 Post No. 18257257
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Hi /adv I recently ended a pretty toxic relationship with my ex because it was slowly destroying me. I love her to this day, but she was massively codependent, after the breakup she admitted to using drugs while we were together (and most likely cheating because she bought from male dealers she used to sleep with for drugs) I'm a recovering addict myself but I'm 4 years completely clean and I really it really fucking seriously. I almost killed myself on drugs.
Anyways, I'm trying hard to get away from her, and I'm thinking I should not even attempt another relationship for a long time, maybe till after I start a career and finish school. Does that make sense? I feel like until then I won't find anyone who will be able to accept that I don't want to get high. So many people these days do, and I'm ok with people drinking around me, I just can't do it myself (making it hard to go on"dates" )
Any advice?
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Really really take it**
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>>18257257
Would that girl let me hug her?
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>>18257257
kind of in the same situation. no where near as severe as you; 9 years, toxic but both non alcoholics or drugs, still techincally together but in the dying breaths of the relationship waiting for her to move out.
Either way, I would say it would be best to just give yourself a year or two to just work on yourself until you are proud/ok with who you are before diving back in. That's at least what i'm planning to do once she's gone.
and yeah I also feel like dating is gonna be hard because i really hate alcohol. Also i'm vegan so that's a hurdle i don't even know how to get around. I think once you do start dating try to deal with the slim pickings. If it doesn't work at least you have more data/experience.
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>>18257905
Hey thank you
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Why rush to get back into a relationship? Just take some time off. Enjoy a little freedom.
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>>18258646
I guess I need to examine why I feel so lonely then. I don't have friends because she would get mad if I didn't spend time with her for any reason other than work.. and hated it if I talked to anyone else. I've got my mom and sibling but that's it.
However I think you're right, I need to not *want/need* a relationship, only when I get to that point I think I'll have happiness to offer someone
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