Girl wants nothing to do with me, try harder?

fuck off, ya blew it

>>18251481
Write a long sappy text about how much she actually means to you and that you fucked up and that you understand if she doesn't want to yadda yadda yadda

If she was that hurt by you fucking an ex when you aren't dating then just play to her highly emotional level. Put the hook back into her

>>18251481
>but I wasn't with her, nor was I looking for anything but friendship
Then why the fuck did you have to tell her about it? It doesn't matter if you were in a relationship or not. If you know someone has feelings for you, and you don't want to escalate, then you don't string them along and give them those personal details. You distance yourself a bit and keep that information to yourself until you start dating. What you did may technically not be wrong, but that doesn't mean she's not going to feel like shit.

>Should I show up to her house and apologize in person, maybe send some flowers to her job, or just fuck off?
Just fuck off. She doesn't care anymore and that would be creepy.

>>18251487
You gotta understand all relationships aren't perfect ppl do fuck up, but I'm willing to make up for it.


>>18251498
Nah a text is just a text, showing up and actually doing something about it and showing up, you know show some effort that I do care.

>just play to her highly emotional level.

Can you explain?

>>18251481

I've been in that situation before. You want two completely different things, and that you're still attached to your ex (even in a sexual way) is off putting. You have no emotional attachment to sex. That would show me that there is no future between me and you. Even if you were never interested in me, I would have no interest in carrying on as friends.

>>18251512
You can't make up for it.

>>18251481
Stop fucking exes

>>18251506
I was trying to be honest, I know how it feels to be lead on, it's happened to me many times, so that's why I told her. I realize I been doing the same, thats been done to me in my past and that's why I feel shitty.

>creepy
Depends how you see it, either she considers it creepy or she might actually see I care to atleast apologize in person and notice that I am trying, maybe?

>>18251534
>and notice that I am trying
You aren't trying. Apologizing, either in text or in person, takes no effort. You're just selfishly trying to make yourself feel better with no regard for her feelings.

>>18251526
Yeah, I guess I just wanted to fuck me and my ex ain't attached it's just bs sex. I'm done with it.... Yeah I guess I fucked up, tho some females do play mind games. That's where I'm at right now, should I fuck off or put some effort and see her in person. I mean come on we all been there where were hurt but deep down we just wish they'd apologize and put up with our anger for a bit and not let us go? Or am I retarded ?

>>18251481
your nothing but a dick with no brain. a dick doesnt have a brain

>>18251531
I am.
>>18251546
she's an hour n half drive.... I was thinking some flowers maybe take her and her kid out... I just feel I fucked up on a good one.

>>18251554
Like I've said women have done the same and I slowly became numb and selfish, don't be a man hater, women are just as bad.

>>18251549

You don't understand. Your apology, which you've already given, means nothing. You fucked up twice and you aren't even in a relationship with her. Why would she even waste the effort on you when you've shown complete disregard for her feelings?

>me and my ex ain't attached it's just bs sex. I'm done with it....
You're still in contact with the ex and you're still having sex with her. You can tell this girl that you're sorry and that it won't happen again, but what reason does she have to trust you? Why jump into a relationship when trust issues are already present?

>>18251557
Oh no, an hour and a half of driving and some food! So hard! So much effort!

>I just feel I fucked up on a good one.
And if she's smart, she'll know to stay the fuck away. And if she has a kid? She wants someone with stability. That's not you.

>>18251559
youre the male equivalent of damaged goods

>>18251565
I was honest from the get go, I told her I wasn't looking for anything, she was talking to other guys as well, while we were on a date she told me to pull up on a guy cuz she liked his beard. We were just friends.

I showed I was honest, most ppl fuck around and don't even tell you. You think you got a good relationship but little do you know. The fact is I wasn't with her, but I'm willing to show I can try.

>>18251571
Lol I get it, not much effort, so what would you recommend doing?

And douche I'm not a father I understand I fucked up, I shouldn't even be feeling like this. I just realized I do care about her. I was a single guy and I didn't know what I wanted. I do now.

>>18251580
Lol yes I am, I been hurt a lot and I'm trying to fix it, we're all damaged goods in one way or another, the only difference is I'm honest about when I fuck up. I'm not acting all high n mighty as I'm some perfect gem, I fucked up and there's no excuse.

I think you guys got me fucked up, I know I fucked up and I don't think that with a simple me showing up or driving there is going to fix it, I'm taking baby steps to get there, but I am willing to put in the time and effort to fix it, whether it be days, months or even years.

>>18251607
If you are sincere, then don't send her flowers/contact her at work. That's weird if she's just your friend. And stop apologizing ffs. She doesn't want to hear it from the sound of it.

>>18251617
A lot of people on /adv/ are just angry because of their own hurt. I can see you're being an honest dude. But you do have to put in real effort if you want your apology to be taken seriously. If she doesn't accept then you learned a valuable lesson and can learn from it for next time. Like others said, you don't exactly come across as stable. But at least your hearts in the right place. I think you're not ready for a relationship yet, but that you're on the right track at the very least because you can see your mistakes and are learning better values.

>>18251598
Talking to other guys =/= fucking exboyfriends. Not everyone sleeps with people they're talking to, and even if she did, keeping an ex in the picture takes it to a whole different level. She's a single mother and needs to be careful about who she lets into her life.

>I showed I was honest, most ppl fuck around and don't even tell you.
>we're all damaged goods in one way or another, the only difference is I'm honest about when I fuck up.
It's cute how you're trying to rationalize shitty behavior.

>I was a single guy and I didn't know what I wanted. I do now.
And she clearly knows what she doesn't want.

>Lol I get it, not much effort, so what would you recommend doing?
Find someone else to hurt until you get your shit straightened out. In all seriousness, you need therapy.

>>18251641
this

>>18251617
>I am willing to put in the time and effort to fix it, whether it be days, months or even years.
That's good and all, but you can't do that if she's already changed her mind about you. You can't make her want to be with you just because you're now willing to work things out on your terms.

>>18251624
Well I've only apologized once, and the flowers thing was something she had mentioned when we were good, that if I can just give her some flowers. It's not me just being weird, and to send it her job was to put it on blast for her friends co workers, kinda how females post everything on Facebook for attention.

>>18251629
I totally get they have there own anger and they're directing it at the ppl who ask for advice on here as if it was us who hurt them, I totally get that. I've done it before. We tend to go thru one problem and assume the next situation is going to be the same with a guy or a girl, "well your acting like my ex who cheated or did this, so you must be the same"

That's honestly hard to get over lol.

I'm not looking to stalk her or anything just try once more if she doesn't want shit to do with me after that I'll fuck off, I can be a man about it. I'd rather have actually tried than not at all and wonder what if.

>>18251661
>It's not me just being weird, and to send it her job was to put it on blast for her friends co workers, kinda how females post everything on Facebook for attention.
Is she that type of person or are you just lumping her in with all the trash you've been with previously? Do you think she really wants a physical reminder of heartache, in addition to the uncomfortable attention from the office? Women gossip, and if you're already hurt, it could cause further problems. Did she mention she liked flowers in general or was she asking for them to help her somehow get over the first time you hurt her?

>>18251641
I totally understand that, but I'm not a bad guy, I been thru shit as well, you know what I've done, I just noticed I made a mistake and I wanna try to fix it.

>shitty behavior
Don't you see I'm trying to make up for it, im willing to go the mile. You can read from my first post I didn't try to come of as a good guy, I clearly said I fucked up and I still say it.

Therapy eh, ill check it out lol.

>>18251673
She liked flowers in general, but going by the over all tone of these posts, I guess I'll just fuck off and leave her alone.

>>18251674
No, you didn't try to come off as a good guy, but you did try to rationalize the behavior by essentially saying all people do these horrible things. So what you did should magically be less bad.

>Therapy eh, ill check it out lol.
Please. It may feel weird in the beginning, and you may think it's stupid, but it will definitely change how you treat people for the better.

>>18251680
I'm not saying you shouldn't, but if you do, make sure they go to her house instead of a public place. Leave her a well thought out letter. And to make it less weird, leave it on the doorstep so that you're not forcing physical interaction on her--some people don't like it when they're in an emotionally vulnerable state.

>>18251661
>I'd rather have actually tried than not at all and wonder what if.
Yea I'd honestly chalk it up to a loss and a fuck up on your part, then learn from the experience and do better next time. I can see why she'd avoid you honestly. But you can use this time to grow into a smarter man.

>>18251689
Nah, when I meant were all damaged goods I meant personality wise, rudeness, selfishness, mental problems, paranoia, and we all do fuck up one way or another. Everyone has there own agenda, whether using someone for there looks, money, sex or whatever it might be. I realized what I did and was hoping to fix it.

>how you treat people
That's the thing tho I use to treAt women like princesses even when they weren't, I've done a lot heart warming things, to show them I did care. I just chose the wrong ones and after awhile it makes you into a numb person and you slowly forget who you once were. This is my first time it's happened and I'm hoping to fix it.

>>18251701
Yeah makes sense but you guys did a good job of discouraging a person, i guess I did fuck and should fuck off, work on myself and be a better person.

>>18251728
Now that you realize what the situation has become, let that be your last ditch effort. The ball will be in her court while you work on yourself. It'll be alright, man.

>>18251737
Yeah fuck it, I ain't even ready for a relationship, she just seemed like a good one and didn't wanna let it go but fuck it, like that one saying if it's meant to be it's meant to be if not oh well.