Tinder General

>>18247314
One question: What do I do after the initial things like

>hey
>how are you
>good you?

I always have no idea how to move onto a subject.

>>18247320

Don't start with those. It's boring.

>>18247321
Okay how else should I start?

>>18247320

Use any and all available context. Women love talking about themselves, so if their bio has an interest or hobby listed or a "fun" fact about themselves then use it to get them going. If they have no bio, then look at their pictures and try and make an observation or present a question to get them going.

If they truly do not have any context that you can use to start a conversation, and it will otherwise be stagnant if you don't take the reigns, just tell a joke or a pun or reveal some activity you did that day (make something up if you don't anything but shitpost on 4chan).

Do NOT volunteer too many details about yourself or your day up front, something as simple as "Just finishing some work" or "Went to the beach with some mates" is good enough. If you say this and they ask for more details, then you have them on the hook and can start branching the conversation wherever you want. You want them to be coming to you for information, don't make it too easy for them to unravel any mystery about you as a person because you will eliminate any intrigue.

If they don't respond or care, then move on because they are not attracted to you and the chances of convincing them over text to see you is are almost 0. The initial reaction they had is burned into their brain, and even if meeting them in person could undo that you won't get that chance. Move. On.

I would take >>18247321's advice with a grain of salt. You don't need an amazing opening to get the conversation going, and you don't need a Reddit-tier pickup line. Tinder is mainly about photos and getting to a meeting/getting a phone number/getting off Tinder as soon as possible.

90% of the matches that I have actually converted into meeting/sex have been based on 'Hello' as the initial interaction.

>>18247324
My go-to opener is "What are you passionate about?"

If they say something like "scientology" or "my 16 cats" I unmatch.

>>18247345
>very first message is "what are you passionate about"

that sounds too strong dude
do you at least say hi first?

>>18247344

Just one caveat about this advice as well: do not open with a context-dependent observation or question, ever. Women don't always check their phone, women also have way more matches than any guy and are often changing their profiles/photos. If they decide to give your message window a shot at a later time and see something vague that doesn't make any sense right away then they will be hesitant to respond and even a slight hesitation is enough for them to just move on to something easy.

>>18247345
>unmatching based on conversation

But why? The only time you should unmatch like this is if they respond along the lines of "Cutting myself" or something. And even then, they could just have a bad sense of humor and their joke misfired because girls can be sperglords on text too.

I only unmatch after a truly bad date. I try to meet anyone I can (if they fall into my range of acceptable attractiveness). It is good practice, and you improve every single interaction. I've been on so many shitty dates (shitty because of me and shitty because of them), and I learn something new about myself, women in general, people in general, and how to conduct myself in such a setting every time. You can only progress in this game, but you have to play the shitty levels too sometimes.

>>18247353
what the fuck is the point of saying "Hi" on tinder
matching does that for you
you need a strong opener if you want to get their attention, considering how big their stack likely is and how many fucking retards she has messaging her "Hello" daily

Can/should I use Tinder to find asexual people?

>>18247344
This is beta ideology.

I always talk about what she's doing on tinder or what she's looking for and then feed off that.

If she's looking for dates then talk about how much your job sucks, or how you wish you could be at home sleeping. Sounds weird and boring but it's exciting for a woman to hear you express yourself. Plus you can laugh about it together.

I always look for girls that are just going with the flow. They are one snapchat add away from being a total slut if you've got a good looking body

>>18247473

Clearly you don't actually use Tinder or at least don't many matches at all. I have so many queued up matches that I have to horizontally scroll through if I want to see all of them. A woman has probably 10x that amount at any given time. If you don't open a message, then it is so much easier to get lost in that. Retard.

>>18247484

This is an amazing troll post.

>>18247484
>Sounds weird and boring but it's exciting for a woman to hear you express yourself.
rofl
I wonder if anyone will actually take this as legit advice

>>18247489
that's my point? when a woman has as many matches as you say, how is opening with "Hello" the optimal strategy lmao

>>18247507
>being this naive

Clearly you are a really nice, sweet funny guy. Why can't I find a nice guy to date like you? rofl

>>18247507

The point is to just ping them and get your photo visible to them at the top of their match list for a moment. You are relying on your photo, not the actual content of your message. If "Hello" isn't enough to get their attention, then your faggy dad joke isn't going to do shit except suck you into a timewaster. Do you know what a timewaster is? It is like a troll, except it is a woman that never wants to meet you but still wants some attention.

>>18247515
>The point is to just ping them and get your photo visible to them at the top of their match list for a moment.
i didn't even consider that ok i'm legit a retard lmfao

>>18247344
Not OP, but generally I'm fine at getting into the conversation. Issue I have is actually getting a date. How should I be transitioning from small talk to getting a date? Or at least getting their number/snapchat?

>>18247402
>>18247484
>>18247489


Kek these faggots have got no tinder pussy. Anybody taking their advise for getting laid on tinder is a moron which most 4chan fags are so yea this a good thread kek

Don't listen to people who say it's about your bio or opening line. It's all about looks you gotta be good looking to get tinder pussy. Don't listen to people who ask you to lift, lifting doesn't make your face look better kek

>>18247540
think of something that 'could be' complex that you know a lot about, eg your job, a hobby, book etc. and then gently steer the conversation to any/all of these. when it does come up, say a little about it and then something like

'its easier to explain in real life tho, we should meet up and talk :)'

>>18247573
Yeah that's fair, that's generally what I do but I guess the "in real life" bit is where I'm fucking up. Generally steering the conversation to my job/hobbies is easy, so that should be easy enough though.

Assuming I have good, well paying job, is that normally a good topic to try to steer the conversation to? Or are things like hobbies, music etc usually better?

>>18247540

It really depends on the situation, just look for the obvious segues and openings. There is no catch-all for executing the actual number/date acquisition. Just try to steer the conversation towards something you think they would want to do while also collecting any information about their current whereabouts/emotional state/interests.

And when I say steer the conversation, I mean just steer. You aren't there for a chat buddy, you should not be having very long back and forth discussions. Don't steer it towards more talking, because they will feel no need to get up and go out to meet you--they are talking to you right now through text, what is the point of meeting you in person just to talk more?

When you get the conversation to an opening, then make a casual (but still specific) suggestion to meet.

Don't just say "We should meet" say "We should meet for coffee, I know a great place near X".

Don't just say "Let's go to the beach" say "Yeah, the weather's great. I was gonna hit the beach, you should come".

Don't just say "Would you wanna get a drink?" say "Let's grab a drink at X".

Obviously word these differently depending on the unique situation.

>>18247540
For me, usually moving fast works wonders. Talk for a few messages, then get her contact to talk to ger out of tinder. Most people in my experience don't keep an eye 24/7 on tinder messages like they do on other text apps.

After that, if you get the conversation flowing, ask them out within the first 48~72h at most. Tinder does a lot of work for you, since a match shows that she's already interested by default. If the conversation goes well, you don't have to keep guessing, she is interested and will go out on a date in the first available opportunity.

>>18247547
Looks do make up a good portion of your success on tinder, but definitly it isn't all. You're just trying to sound handsome and edgy.

>>18247579
depends on the girl. some want to latch onto a career minded person, some want to 'live life' with a starving artist who paints eggs, some want other shit. make a guess depending on the info you have on the girl and then steer towards that

but you should spend little time actually talking on tinder, try and get a real life meeting set up as soon as possible

>>18247594
>>18247596
>>18247601
All good advice, I guess the issue I'm having is just the fact I'm leaving it too long to move it off of tinder into real life. I don't find getting matches that hard on their own, but it sounds like my lack of success is due to how I've been approaching the chat itself. There's also the fact that sometimes I ruin a chat by saying something autistic, but that's definitely becoming a lot rarer kek.

Match --> start conversation in a vaguely mutual area that I have some sort of expertise or knowledge in --> get date in something related to that area, all within first day or two... should be easy enough. Thanks.

>>18247626
>Match --> start conversation in a vaguely mutual area that I have some sort of expertise or knowledge in --> get date in something related to that area, all within first day or two...

>>18247594 here. I disagree with that course of action. If you want a very simple overview, I would present something like this:

Match --> start conversation (doesn't matter about what, just get her talking) --> pounce on the first branch in the conversation that could potentially lead to action --> execute the call to meet --> gauge the reaction.

If you get a straight up rejection with no counter, move on immediately. If you get a counter, ball is in her court and you just wait. Either way, if they don't give you the number or agree to meet, you disengage.

>>18247653
Yeah, seems that's primarily about trying to start a conversation in an area that may or may not be mutual vs starting a conversation in any area, as long as it's something she seems like she will reply to. Point taken, by doing it the way you're saying you're probably increasing overall response rate, which is the goal.

Point is, I guess, optimise the initial message in order to get a response in the first place and optimise the conversation such that you get off of tinder and into the real world as quickly as possible.

I'd love to see your matches screenshot

I hardly get one match a week

Is tinder exclusively to meet and fuck? Why do people even bother about how to respond, what to say, etc.? Why don't people just go straight to "where and when do we meet to fuck"?
I never used Tinder, of course, but I just don't get it.

>>18247741

I have 69 currently. I've probably unmatched maybe 30 myself at this point, and been unmatched 10 or 15 times. I've been using it for about 3 weeks.

>>18247754

It is a dating app, it isn't just for hooks or one night stands. I'd say the majority of the people on it are interested in dates (probably for the purpose of hooking up at some point), but people can be more selective about who they meet.

>>18247741

Do you live in a big city?

>>18247741
I go on and off so I deleted it completly a few times now. But I use it to find girls for a specific fetish/purpose that are kinda hard to come by, and I have the same success rate as you.

>>18247754
Because if you don't play by the rules you don't win the prize. And people usually don't want to fuck if you're gorgeous but also a creepy rapist type

>>18247805
>>18247844
I'm Mexican brown and I think tinder works well for white guys.

I tried swiping in Toronto but had the same success rate of 1 in a week. I changed my preferences to men kek just to check if this thing is actually working and I got plenty of matches.

I guess I must be ugly and being non white doesn't help.

So how do I start a conversation with matches?

I got like 15 cute matches so far but I have no idea what to say

>>18247893
Or maybe you just look like a faggot if you had success with guys lol

>>18247895
Read the fucking thread

>>18247917
Naw I think gay tinder is pretty clear you're looking to bang so faggots on there don't care about looks

>>18247895
are you an archaeologist

>>18247921
This thread is about humans, not matches

I literally want to talk with a fire match but it won`t fucking respond

>1 success per week
What the fuck, is that real?

I can easily get 2 or 3 successes per day and I was thinking that was bad or below average, I guess it's fine for a guy after all

Damn here I'm getting no matches and Chads talking about how to open a convo and close the ticket in bed.


Fuck life's not fair

>>18247944
>This thread is about humans, not matches

Wtf nigger read the fucking thing, there's a ton of replies concerning what to talk to matches, if you can't even do that just delete tinder and kys

>>18247952
Yep it was me who posted that.

Kik is mocohocarolyn i can show you Chads my pix I'm so fucking ugly

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>>18247963
We're talking about different matches here dumbass, I'm referring to pic related literally

You people are such normies

I'm none of the above posters, and here's my two escudos

There's not going to a one single formula that works for all women. Obviously some of the talking points that anons itt will recommend as an opener, will work in many cases, otherwise we wouldn't see them pop up that often in threads like these.
They are usually either
>I am the man and here is you (hello Anonette)
or
>I'm an interesting guy, and I walk to stand out on the app, so here is my comment on you bio/pic, with addition question that will get your reply

Now, in my case I rarely use the same opener twice, but will either comment on what's in her profile, or simply say something about the fact that we just matched and the circumstances or what to expect.
Some examples:
Fucked a single mom for a couple of months two years ago - my opener was "Hello Maria with long, long hair" - She didn't respond for eight weeks (didn't really use the app,) but soon got talking about what we're looking for. I knew all her fetishes and she had been getting off to things I wrote her before we met. Fucked on the first date, in the afternoon, and felt that er already knew eachother.

My opener with the girl I've been dating/fucking for the last 5 months was "I'm already enjoying this conversation" - she responded with a gif of some Basketball American showing skepticism, and I replied with a gif of Carlton from Fresh Prince doing his dance, and then she said "okay, now I'm enjoying it as well" - I asked if we should just skip the initial stages, and just start to date in the regular. One week later I had the first date I've been on that didn't lead to fucking on the first date, (accept one time I went for drinks one hour after matching with a girl I wasn't really into, because if boredom.) Still dating her, woke up and made her blow me this morning.

The girl I'm going to meet up with for hooks in the coming week, my opener was "You seem kinda fresh, kinda care" - She said "pretty much"

Cont.

>>18247964
show it.

>>18247982
Posts like these just make me feel more worse about myself kek.

I'm the guy who doesn't get any matches. I'm telling y'all forget openers or bio it's all about looks. 95% looks

>>18248009
it is 95% looks

theres nothing you can do about that though so if youre falling down here asking for advice isnt going to help

>>18248009
If you don't have the looks, make pictures that complement what you have

You can look like an ugly mean bastard, just go with it and use pics playing rugby or doing martial arts, or if you're the hipster type, post pics fixing a clock or getting shells on the beach

Make yourself interesting

>>18248031
Exactly what I'm saying faggot.
This thread is dumb and unnecessary if you get matches then you're OK and most likely will get pussy on the regular

>>18248031
>>18248039
You don't get matches because you're both evidently autists

>>18247982
Cont'd.

I started asking her questions to figure how used she is to getting lewd messages and approaches, and went on telling her what I wanted to do to her body. Her initial response was "haha, eugh," but continued to show interest in hearing more. I went on telling her stuff like how creepy I am, but she shouldn't worry about the plastic sheets I got covering the floors - I'm an artist, and live in my studio. The past week she's been sending me explicit photos on Snapchat, but we've been too busy to meet yet.

My whole point is that although talking dirty works wonders, knowing when to begin is an art I'm still trying to master.

My match rate isn't great, I got 67 matches at the moment, and I got no idea how many times I've been unmatched. I've only met six or seven women, fucked four of them on the first date (two of witch I only had two dates/hooks with), and also met two others out in town (weren't really dates, but made out,) and I'm not really a ONS kind of guy. I'm 33 btw, and my 5 months long date is 24 (we talked about non-monogamy in our first date, usually I tell my dates I'm not looking for anything exclusive, but open for long term,) The young woman sending me nudes recently is 22.

Not sure if I got a philosophy, but not sticking to one method has worked for me

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>>18247497
>>18247547
>>18247489


Whatever. More pussy for me

>>18247489
Honestly mate, how fucking stupid are you?

>>18248077
hmm i read a thread you were in the other day (advising people to open with <girls_name>!, what do you want from tinder)

i got to say dude, ive been trying that and it doesnt work for me, 0/14 so far. desu i dont think the line is that good, probs just youre looks. though were you the guy who also had a fake profile?

>>18248136
It's too rough and straightforward to open with that. Do small talk for a while and try to figure it out by indirect means

>>18248162
if youre the guy i responded to originally, you literally told us to OPEN with that. and in the picture, youre doing that

>>18248181
I'm not. In fact, the times I tried it by a friend's recommendation it failed too.