boyfriends clingy ex

Maybe you two should try to help her find a new boyfriend.

>>18230944
Does she not take a hint with him not responding? I was going to say maybe work out some sort of threesome thing to let her get over everything fully. But not if shes fucking crazy.

Fuck that bitch up!

>>18230958
>>18230960
>>18230969

No, she wants him only. He's her first everything and I'm sure she was convinced they would end up marrying.

She's not taking a hint, she thinks he's responding slowly because it hurts him to talk to her because he still loves her, but they can't be together right now because she's moved away for work and is currently not here.

>>18230983
His ex is not his responsibility anymore, he should cut contact

>>18232085
This.
He just really needs to tell her that they're over and never talk to her anymore.
He's leading her on.

>>18230944
I'm on the other end of the gender pond and I have been in the exact same circumstance as your boyfriend, the similarity is actually a little creepy if I'm being honest.
I opted for his route and we eventually fell out of contact, but what he needs to realise is that you can't go through life appeasing everybody, and occasionally it's not even in everybody's best interests to be appeased

If he knows about this comment thread I want you to show him this comment, I'm specifically requesting that you do so he can get the following message from somebody who's dealt with this and a few other equally awkward breakups:

This woman is going to hate your guts anyway when the contact fades to the point that she finally gets the hint, I get that you don't want to hurt her feelings but at this point it's almost selfish not to do so.
That's because this could end in a few different ways, but NONE of them involve her getting back with you, what she's got now is a false hope that won't ever be realised. In the worst case scenario the ongoing limbo might actually start to interfere with your new relationship, and you want to be spending this time getting to know your new girlfriend.

You can be perfectly polite about it, but you're simply going to have to tell her that even though the time you spent with her was special it's over now and it's not healthy for you or fair on your new girlfriend to keep this contact going.

She'll be mad, but your girlfriend has hit the nail on the head: she's high on the idea that you're still her prince charming and you'll come back to her in the end: the only cure for that is a nice cold splash of reality.

>>18230944
Also if she threatens you with her life, or has done so in the past (if the similarities hold, I'm willing to bet she has), you have an option available besides running to her rescue.

Call the police.

They deal with suicide attempts, they can check up on her to make sure she's okay and do a better job of it than you can if something actually has gone wrong.

>>18232103

This.

However he might just be leading you on too. If he still has feelings for her maybe he isn't right for you. I personally wouldn't want to date someone who's still having feelings for their ex.

Sounds like drama I wouldn't even want to deal with

>>18230944
Okay your bf needs to understand he's lucky to have you and he NEEDS to cut this girl off. I had a GF like that before and the only fucking way is to completely cut off. It hurt, and now I have no one, but it was a toxic as hell relationship

>>18232113

I don't know the extent of her craziness, I'm afraid of her hurting herself for attention and him feeling guilty for it to the point where he starts resenting me for it. At the same time I refuse to let this girl dictate ours, or my, life.

>>18232122

Trust me, I didn't sign up for this drama, and I thought this whole thing would be over and done with by now. I get my boyfriends logic in the fading-out scenario, but I don't think it applies here since she literally only has him.

>>18230944
You must destroy her in mortal combat. It is the only way.

My boyfriend's mental ex reared her ugly head some time last year. He asked me what I thought he should do and I said it was his choice, but by entertaining her he was essentially prolonging something that had no purpose.

They weren't friends when they broke up, it was a messy break up and she is an incredibly destructive person. He knew this too and made the decision (by himself) to politely explain that he didn't want to continue contact. Fortunately she got the hint, thanked him for his response, then disappeared into the ether to orbit someone else.

If your boyfriend is refusing to cut contact, especially when you've suggested you're not comfortable with it, then he probably has ulterior motives. There is no reason for him to continue talking to her other than having her as back up or an outlet to complain about you and receive gratification, while having the feeling of familiarity. Either that, or he doesn't feel your relationship is a long term thing and wants to keep her in the picture in the hopes it might happen again in future.

Even if he isn't still interested or hopeful it'll work out with her in future (and I don't think this is the case), he is putting her happiness and emotional wellbeing above yours, which says a lot.

>>18233251
I honestly don't know what to do here. I talked to him about it and he said he was going to take care of it, but didn't want to do it during our long weekend, which I guess I understand? And now it's monday but I've yet to hear anything about it, I'm certain she's sent him a couple texts this morning per usual.

I can't keep having this fight with him. he won't share what's going on or take my advice because he thinks I'm biased and i want to watch her burn. I honestly couldn't care less, I don't want her hurting herself but she has a detrimental effect on our relationship, and it's like my boyfriend refuses to acknowledge that.

How do I approach this now? I'm at a fucking loss.

>>18230944
She was a virgin when she met him, you were not. Objectively speaking, she has more right to be with him than you.

>>18233319

She wasn't a virgin, from what I heard she lost her virginity to a one night stand. I lost my virginity to a LTR before my boyfriend. does this make a difference to you? wanna assess who has more right to be with him? is there a chart, a point-system?

>>18233354
>I heard she lost her virginity to a one night stand. I lost my virginity to a LTR before my boyfriend.

Oh.
Then you win.