How can I (male late 20s) best help my partner (female late 20s)

>>18222931
my girlfriend is the same for like a couple of mounth. Now whe have sex like once a week the most,and only doggy style. She doesn't suck my dick anymore,and dont let me spary the cum on her ass anymore. But on the bright side,i have sex with escorts and i consume my sexual need elsewhere.

>>18222931
Send her to therepy

I couldn't deal with that shit. You are a saint my dude. I need a hoe in bed

>>18222946
also i'm in my late 20s,and my advice to you is,look elsewhere for sex,and dont tell her anything. Women are very superficial,selfish bitches,and she would blame you for everything. Just keep your cool. Also my relationship is almost 8 years with her,in this time i had sex with more than 40 women,mostly escorts.

>>18222931
>hen I try to talk about this with her she tends to say things like "are relationships only about sex?" "do you only care about sex?" "I am not a prostitute" etc.

Tell her that maybe she needs to shut the fuck up and realize that sex is part of a healthy adult relationship.

Also let her know she is being a terrible wife for being so dismissive of your problems and needs.

>>18222931
>you only care about sex
>I am not a prostitute
Being sex shamed by your own partner...Holy shit. You're going to have to have a come to Jesus talk with her.

>>18222931
>i am not a prostitute
Sounds like you have damaged woman without libido. She used sex just to manipulate you to stay with her. Sex means nothing to her. Whatever is the reason. Sorry OP.

Look here
>>18219728

And break up, buy dragon sleeve or let her off from anti pregnancy pills.

If she cannot see the importance of sex in a relationship, there isn't really much you can do. If she is saying it really defensive and shrill like, it is because she doesn't believe what she is saying.
>I am not a prostitute
What a strange thing to say in defense of not having sex with your partner. Has she had trauma in the past? You said sometimes she just completely shuts down in the middle of sex, that sounds like it could be a PTSD symptom

Also, how long has it been since you made sex completely about her pleasure? As in communicating with her what feels good.

If you do all the above and she still aggressively denies you sex or is up for zero cooperation, don't seek sex elsewhere, just dump her. Because it is a sign further down the relationship that she will take and take without giving.
>I'm not some broodmare, don't make me have a kid
>Why don't YOU clean and cook
Etc.

She doesnt want to get her hopes up or look silly. What she needs is to feel secure to make mistakes and she needs victories.
So she needs to complete a project. She needs t f up and have you not tell ANYONE. Once she feels comfortable then she will want to try sex stuff. Thats how I was. Some people are scared of the future. If you leave then what. You have to show that you are trustworthy. That no matter what you are cool. She maybe scared you are going to leave if she does something wrong.
The denile of pleasure- why does she feel the need to do this. Ask her. You been together 6 yrs. Say, " why do you deny yourself pleasure". And when she turns it around on you say, " this isnt about me. Everytime you are enjoying an activity you stop. Its like you have a secret." that should get her talking. Or atleast get you more sex.

>>18222968
In the time we have been together she has used progesterone+estrogen BC, progesterone only BC and no BC. No real noticeable change between them.

>>18222971
>Also, how long has it been since you made sex completely about her pleasure? As in communicating with her what feels good.
The thing that makes me hardest is a girl with a wet pussy going crazy so that is the #1 thing I aim for everytime.
No trauma that I am aware of. Have not seen any hint of it either.
It is not a full shutdown because if I stop doing whatever it was and move on to something else she will get back into it (usually anyway, occasionally she ends up annoyed and just stops altogether).
She is not from the west and the attitudes towards sex in her home country are pretty messed up. Simultaneously super-prudish enough to make americans look wild, and porn is outright banned but then their music industry is hyper-sexualised (k-pop anyone).
She is not particularly shrill or defensive, she says it in a demure voice. Sounds more like she cannot understand why I would want sex more than once every couple weeks or why I might want to touch her breasts when cuddling and is offended by it.

>>18222992
But no two BCs are the same, and what worked for her 6 years ago might not now. Is she on something right now?

>>18223005
She is on a progesterone only one at the moment.

>>18223010
It could be that. Most BCs ended up affecting my libido to the point it really frustrated both of us. And due to my clinical time in the ER in nursing school, I swore off IUD of any sort. Fucking slicing this girl's spleen because it free floated into the abdomen. Had this happen to 3 different women who went to three different OBGYN in the 3 months I did my ER rotation. Terrifying and ruined their fertility.

Is her cycle regular? Then just use timing and condoms. I use an app to track my fertility so we know when to be more careful.

>>18223017
Like I said, she has not always been on BC and it was no different during the times without it.
She uses the BC for reducing the pain of her period (normally very painful) so it is not something that could be dropped comfortably.

This is the second progesterone only BC she has used as the first one gave her irregular periods (like 2 per month).

It seems like her responses are toward you asking her for sex and not just asking her why she doesn't.

Have you asked her why she doesn't like or want to have sex in general? Not just "y wont u haves sex w/ me!!!"

>>18223031
Nope, usually in response to something like touching her breasts while cuddling or asking her why she does not enjoy sex more.

>>18223031
>>18223035
"I am not a prostitute" is the reason she gives for not getting more into sex.

>>18223021
>painful periods
Does she know why? Polycystic ovary syndrome and endometriosis both have painful periods and low libido as symptoms.

If she has the former, Magnesium supplements work wonders. Takes about 4-6 weeks to kick in, but once it did I could stop taking hormones, and even had higher energy.

I don't know as much about endometriosis

>>18223035
>>18223038

Yeah it's a half assed excused that hinges on you feeling guilty. It seems like she is more than just apathetic about having sex.

Have you asked her why she doesn't enjoy sex in a non-sexual situation? Talking about it while being physically intimate or while you're horny isn't going to make any headway on the issue.

>>18223038
>>18223035
She is Korean, surely she understands the concept of work and pleasure. As in a prostitute enjoying sex is an act, in actuality she is trying to get money to eat and live. It is actually being more like a prostitute to treat sex as routine, or to imply to herself she shouldn't have pleasure. That is more like a prostitute I'd say.

Passionate relationships have passion and pleasure, prostitution doesn't.

>>18223043
I am not aware of anyone specifically saying what causes it but she has a retroverted uterus which is associated with period pain.
For what it's worth we both take magnesium each night and Vitamin D in the morning.

>>18223048
She does enjoy sex, she just has this thing where she does not want to do too much that is sexual. That is a bit of a shitty explanation but I don't really know how to explain it.
She will enjoy sex, and she will enjoy me going down on her, but she will ask me not to go down on her.

>>18222931
You seem to know what to do your just hesitate to act. Your happiness is paramount in the relationship. And your sexual needs have to be taken care of. Period.
Let her know you have a biological need to fuck. If she can't fulfill that need then you'll have to go else where. If she's not cool with that you'll need to break it off with her. Don't be mean about it. Just let her know how it is for men your age.
This is one of the power struggles that most relationships go through. If you don't be truthful with her you'll end up having a sexless marriage where your begging for sex and your both not happy.