My marriage has been strained for a long time. After years of

You're not obligated to drop what you're doing and fuck her, don't apologise.

Also if she initiated sex then she's not asexual, lol.

Talk to her about it and not us. Why aren't you discussing this with her? She needs to know how you feel about this shit.

>>18211207

She didn't do it because she wanted sex. She did it as an olive branch I think.

>>18211208

After six months of therapy I feel like I've said all I have to say to her about this. I'm not going to apologize because I don't think I did anything wrong. It shouldn't be my fault that if she wants to have an asexual relationship that my feelings towards her change.

>>18211201

well, you now realize that the real reason we do things isn't for love so much as for sex. we still love the person, but remove sex from the equation and suddenly you're actually just equals. and a lot of women don't like that.

I doubt your wife was ever actually asexual. Women tend to grow tired of sex with the same man because the man tends to stop trying to make it interesting once things settle down. as a result she just doesn't feel strong sexual urges and interprets that as asexuality.

if a new man chased her she'd probably feel the urges again, and even you could rekindle that spark with enough effort.

unfortunately you guys are in a fucked up situation. she thought she could have this lifestyle without giving sex. i feel really fucking misogynistic talking like this, but when you boil this situation down to its basic form, this is whats happening. She realized that not having sex means she doesn't get special treatment anymore and she wants it back (and frankly, who wouldn't).

i think the big thing you need to do here is decide what you want out of this. would ou have sex with her again if not for that you were busy? if so you should just respectfully decline and say ;this is an important test, but I am always willing afterward;. seeing as the moment has passed all you can do is apologize if you do want to have sex again.

but that kinda just proves me point, we give special attention to women for sex, not really for romance.

>>18211217
OK, then why are you asking us for advice if you've made up your mind about how to handle it?

It sounds like you should get divorced but you don't want to.

>>18211224

Oh I want a divorce. I asked for one at the end of six months of therapy but the therapist recommended we try to adjust for awhile and see if we could find something that works. So I'll probably bring it up again. I just hate it because we have kids, and honestly for most of our life things are fine. We care about each other and work well together as parents.

>>18211240
Yeah, but you can still care about her and be good parents as divorced people.

So do that, man. If you've come to terms with her, tell her you appreciate her offer and don't want to fuck her because you want a divorce to fuck someone else (I assume) because that's what you want. You don't have to feel guilty about that shit, that's reasonable. There's no virtue in staying together just to do it, or just for the kids.

She decided to come out as assexual to you and a therapist. Why the hell would you feel bad for not attending to a need she openly says she doesn't have??? She brought this uppon herself, there shouldn't be anything there to fix, and if there is, it is between her a multiple sessions with a shrink.

Also I honestly hope you're getting some on the side. If she can dissossiate sex from love as in you don't need the first to have the second, she should accept that the other way around is also true. She's assexual, you're not.

>>18211250
This. Divorce is probably the healthiest thing you can do since you'll probably stay on good terms and both still be in your kids lives.

>>18211201
ill fuck her for u faggot