GIOYC

I know shit is rough for you right now. I'm sorry that I have been like this through the process of it. I know I wasn't too supportive in the past, but all I can do my is try my best now.

Hang in there and fight. Don't let it get to you, you're a strong woman. Always been, so it's good hear that you are working for your future. I was way too self-centered, kinda wish I could have seen it before. Sadly, we sometimes become blind to our own faults and let them get out hand.

Thank you for helping me see all this. Regardless of what is happening now, I truly appreciate you and the time you gave me. Take care. I wish you the best.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77R1Wp6Y_5Y

Your voice felt so right. I'd do anything to hear you laugh again. I wish I knew where you were.

How the fuck do you figure out what to do in life? I'm 18. I have had a job before working part-time at the supermarket. I have a gf and I'm happy but I just don't know what career to chose or how? I'm thinking about joining the military or going or doing a degree but I don't know how to decide. Anyone going through something similar?

I hate myself so goddamn much but I will learn to love myself. I will destroy myself to save whatever is left.

What a fucking idiot, no fucking conception of the give and take of soft power. Yes, you lost a bit, but for fucks sake you had to lose something in exchange for breaching contract. Are you dtill a fucking child, signing things without having the wits to actually read them? Completely your responsibility.

Trying to play hard power over losing that little something after, shit, I'm done wiping your ass for you.

And to not even apologise once you realised you'd crossed *me*, not some rando fuck at head office or whatever..? No, I'm not going to take the adult role yet again in our next meeting, and broach the topic. You fucking man up for a goddamn change.

I'm not sure where I want to go in life. I thought Computer Science was for me but once I started college I realized that I only liked it because my family praised me for being able to open IE or Chrome, something they're too fucking retarded to figure out themselves. I want to change to Journalism but I don't know if the pay would be enough to sustain me or a family if I get married, and I'm just really lost.

In the end your actions justified my choice to leave. You didnt care about me in the slightest. I don't understand why you couldn't have just told me the truth. I would have left you alone and just fucked off on my own.

Instead you try to pin things on me and you vilify me and my actions as if you did nothing wrong. No, you were just as much a part of mess as I was. I played my role as did you. Maybe some day you'll finally come to see this. Maybe you'll grow up as well. I wasn't the only immature one in our relationship. I was just the more vocal of the two.
I saw the ship sink and tried my best to save it, as the water came rushing in I was ready with bucket in hand and you? You already had a life jacket and running for the boats.

>>18209999
Nice quads but seriously Journalism is a very very difficult career, I advise against that.
Source: My father was a journalist and he hated that job and the pay is not worth it.

>>18210022
Fuck. Well, at least I have the summer to look at other options. Thanks for your input, you don't know how much I've been beating myself up on whether or not it would be the right choice.

>>18209951
I don't know what to do. I really don't. Is this temporary?

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>take major field test as a finishing requirement for my degree
>expect to do middle of the pack since I didn't really care because the score doesn't matter for earning my degree
>get 98th percentile
Fuck my life what is wrong with people in this country? I'm not even anything special and I never put in extra effort but I'm consistently on top of any kind of testing.

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>>18209951
I have a folder filled with nothing but Patrick Bateman reaction pictures
I often forget to call my girlfriend because I'm looking for rare Bateman pictures

Been using fallout 4 and Overwatch to keep myself occupied. I wanna do things with my friends but they're all currently sick. It just adds to how alone I've already been since last Saturday. I'm doing better though, don't always have the thought of what happened last Wednesday and Saturday in my head, but when I'm alone it does. "There's no distraction to mask what is real." I also think I figured out what was wrong, think I wanted to talk to them more than they did to me. Too bad they didn't just confront me about it.

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I've been working hard on myself over the years (went from beta-shut in to normal and fit person), but still had no success with relationships.
It's hard to have optimism when there's noone telling you something as simple as "I like you" or even showing any signs.

It's even harder when there are people around me who have it way easier (girls basically throw themselves on a friend of mine, although he has a gf. Another one got a cute gf and all he did for it was sit at home playing vidya all day long)

It's not like there was never anyone interested in me, it's just that there has never been anything mutual.
:(

>>18210066
Your faggoty? Definitely not.

>>18210148
Just be patient, man. You'll meet someone eventually, just as long you keep getting yourself noticed.

>got a verbal warning at work because some lady followed me outside after my shift was done and noted that I didn't immediately leave within the first 10 seconds of entering my car so she assumed that I was hiding out in the parking lot while at work.

Why do women in particular go out of their way to make life a living hell for me? I've done nothing wrong and never interacted with this lady before, yet she goes out of her way to write an angry email to my supervisor about me, assuming the absolute worst, while I'm turning on my cell phone to check missed calls/messages before I start my car and drive away.

Should I just fuck the fat girl?

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>>18209963
>tfw your phone vibrates and for that slight period of time in between the notification your heart flutters and you think its her and all your problems dissipitate and you find true genuine happiness for that 1 second before realizing it's not actually her

>>18210213
Thats just the way women are. They are the cause of almost all workplace drama.

I'm thinking about fucking over my criminal parents.

I realized something important today: It's basically useless for me to complain about my problems. Over the past few years, I've lost most of the enjoyment I used to find in life, and I've vented about it a lot all over the internet. Typically no one responds, but sometimes I get really insightful responses from people with a similar problem. Nearly every time, they've suggested that a good diet, exercise, meditation, and recreational drugs have a good chance of fixing my problem. And what do I do? Nothing. I ride off the wave of pleasure I get from "figuring something out" and imagining myself healthier, yet I never fully commit to the solutions. When meditation wasn't working after a few weeks, I called it quits instead of adjusting my technique. I still eat a shitload of chocolate even though I shouldn't. Perhaps most importantly, I let myself linger in negative thought patterns and mope about how I can't feel any pleasure even though that's not totally true.

Thinking negatively hasn't benefited me even once. The best advice I've gotten is from threads that go "Here's my problem, how do I fix it?". Since I started my new job, I've taken meditation back up, and it really is effective at showing the pointlessness of this circulatory, depressed thinking. Perhaps you'll say it's bullshit, but I really think I'm ready to change now. I feel more focused, more motivated, and it's not as big of a deal.

I can't get my dick up on this medication, and I'm afraid to meet women because if things get intimate then I'm fucked (or not, as the case may be).

My snake is dying of blood cancer and all anyone can bitch about is not getting their fucking cock up, weather or not to bang a land whale, and their shit career path. Fuck you all. I can never get a fucking break. Jesus Christ.

>>18210279
Fuck your snake i hope it gets cancer

Thank god I only have 2 more months of this shitty life. I finally got the chance to go back to Alaska and work as a processor, I've done it once before and loved it. Nothing but work and making money. Away from my shitty life here in a fucked up city I hate. Cept this time I think I'll stay in Alaska with the money I'll make. Last time I went I didn't stay cause I had friends and a girl I was interested in. Now I'm friendless and the cunt I was getting close to fucked me over, so I've got nothing to stay here for anymore. Good riddance to this fucked up city. 2 more months and I'm starting my life over.

>>18210279
Fuck your snake.

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>>18209951
I've posted this in another board, but I don't care. I'm 23 years old and I feel like shit. I'm probably going to get kicked out this year. I'm not doing well in any of my classes and I just don't like my major. I've been in school for 5 years and I'm still a fucking junior. I hate my life so much. I have never had sex or had a gf. I'm bad at meeting new people and just connecting with them, especially if they're women. I hate my retail job so fucking much. I fucking hate working with high school kids.

I've been applying for a lot of desk positions and office jobs. Idk maybe I can work my way up or something. I really hope I can get a good job. I'm terrible at interviews, so trying to get a real job scares me. I've been reading blog and watching videos on how to do well in interviews, but fuck man I'm still pretty nervous.

I've also been studying for IT certs. It will make me look a lot more well rounded......I hope.

I just feel like a fucking loser. A lot of my friends I went to high school with are done with their degrees, getting married, having kids, going on vacation and buying houses. And all I'm doing is failing at life.

fucking hope things get better.

>>18210279
>worm gets aids
>cries about how his problems are worse than everyone else's

>>18210332
>I've been applying for a lot of desk positions and office jobs.
Why? Work a job that doesn't crush your soul. You already sound miserable, and you want to add a desk job on top of that? How long till you an hero under those conditions?

I'm leaving in 10 weeks. I will never see you again. I will not call you. I will not text you. I will not be your Facebook friend. I don't care for you any longer. If I'm too full of hate for you then don't worry, it's not your problem any more. Just pretend I died. Pretend my body was eaten by vultures.

I promise you you will never cross my mind again.

Why did this have so much meaning to me?

When my crush was the only non-family member to wish me a happy birthday? This includes my best friends, and others...

>>18210332
Similar position to you except I'm 27 and out of uni and in a dead end retail job filled with dickhead managers.

I've taken a break to look for other things, but Christ, I haven't left the house in over week and haven't talked to anyone either since my work is what little bit of socialization I have. I barely have any motivation to get out of bed, let alone search for shit.

I can't get a girl off my mind. She's about 7 leagues above me, the most beautiful person I've seen. How do I either shake this or talk to her. I find talking to women is so pressured and I get really nervous and can't figure out to say. I feel like Shit because I can't control how I feel and I don't even know if what I'm feeling is even real. I feel like shit because I'm no one to her but she's everything to me, or so it seems. Please help.

>>18210406
Because I feel like it will be a lot better than working in retail. Having a office job sounds more respectable than working with hs kids.

>>18210423
Fuck man. what was your major?

Should I shit on the sitter; or sit on the shitter?

>>18209951
I feel like /lgbt/ should be /lgbtib/ for lesbian, gay, trans, and everything in between. I'm genderfluid, and feel under-represented on 4chan sometimes.

>>18210461
girl liking girls: lesbian
guy liking guys: gay
guy liking girls: in between
pick a better label

I feel like life isn't for me. Studying and getting a degree sounds like something I will never manage to do. Getting a job that pays just enough to move out seems impossible right now. I just feel so useless. All my interests will never be a job, but I am not willing to give them up, but I think once I start studying or working I won't have time for them at all. I will get stuck in a life that's not for me.

>>18210502
And that my friends, is why I'm a dishwasher.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5A-4VGfx5lU

It sucks ass, my soul and body are always drained every day I even come, and I hate almost everyone here. On top of this, I dropped out of fucking community college.
However, I got benefits, free food, and a full-time schedule to pay for my bills and shit. In a matter of months, I might even be promoted.

Deep down, I feel there's enough justification to end my own life, but I have not the courage to do so.

I straight don't give a fuck about your politics.

Be me, bitter salty single bitch.
Be my roommate, getting a new bf and in that fucking gross ass honeymoon phase.

Be me again, stuck fucking listening to this cunt humble brag about how in love she is, how great her boyfriend is, all the wonderful dates they've been on, etc etc.

I'm gonna fucking murder her I swear, I told her a billion times I do not wanna hear about her fucking boyfriend. And I certainly don't wanna hear about her fucking her boyfriend. Or hear her fucking her boyfriend in general. All of which I've had to put up with and goddamn I'm sick of it.

>>18210465
Don't feed the troll.

My friends suck

Everytime I wanna get sum fuk it's always either cheating wives/girlfriends, swingers, girl who just got out of a relationship. the former 2 more than the latter.

I. I'm. I'm just sick of it, it's not that I don't want to feel guilt over getting someone's SO in bed with me. It's that I DON'T WANT TO FUCK WOMEN WHO ARE CHEATING ON THEIR GUY. (I don't find this out till later btw.) No matter if they're my type physically, personality etc. My guts just turn inside out and I can't fucking understand why women cheat. If I say something to the guy I know I'll get Castrated socially and I hold no doubts physically since women are bat-shit crazy.

Maybe it comes from having been cheated on in my past relationships, but no guy who is providing so much to his girl should ever get cheated on. The least she can do is say hey I no longer want to be in a relationship and would rather be on my own or some shit like that.

>>18210461
Because genderfluidity is dumb. When I wear male clothes and do masculine stuff I don't become male. Genderfluid seems like the identity that strives to be the most special of all with the lowest effort.

>>18210582
Same here, except i'm a bitter, single khv boy, my coworker's bragging about smashing some small waitress, even though all he did was get her number.

I GET IT, UR HAPPY, DON'T RUB IT IN.

I've been sexting with a girl I don't know in real life and she wants to have a threesome with either a guy or girl, the thing is I developed feeling for her (call me cap autismo) and I even asked to be my girlfriend she said that she bodies up twice and that she's only into mural things now, basicly basicly a "maybe later" and she makes me ask other people of thy want to join us but I don't want because I fear I will be overshadowed by other guy and finding girl's it's almost impossible

>>18210610
Broked*

>>18210582
There's a way to communicate this in a mature way. "Hey, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but you talking about your boyfriend all the time is hurting me. It's been a while since I've had a boyfriend, and I am jealous. Could you please talk about him less?"

It's not bad to have these sorts of negative feelings. Everyone does. You just need to learn to communicate them and not bottle them up until you feel that you are going to "murder her" which I realize is probably an exaggeration, but the point still stands.

Or keep on being a passive aggressive cunt. Whatever you want.

>>18210609
Hey at least you don't gotta live with them. And basically watch them fuck on your couch while you go get some dinner.
>>18210618
I did. Multiple times. Like my phrasing was basically
"Hey, cool I'm glad you've found someone, I really am. I don't really wanna hear about it though, you know how long its been for me and I'm super bitter about it. I hate talking about romance and couples in general, I always have, so I don't really wanna hear about yours either. Again, super happy for you, but can you have those conversations with another friend? I'll be here when you wanna talk about shitty anime and how much our degree program sucks though."

She still does it. She like slips it in so fucking casually.
"Oh me and ANON went to the beach the other day. It was so fun spending the whoooollee day with ANON. ANON did the cutest thing there tee hee"
The way she just fucking name drops him all the goddamn time I'm like I GET IT YOURE FUCKING.

>>18209951
Im in love with a great and old friend of mine (12 years)and im like 95% sure she loves me too. We havent talked about it directly or done anything. We just talk the same old shit and lol.

I also have a gf. She is my best friend. I love her very much, no problems.

I dont plan on cheating or leaving her for the other girl, or engaging in any kind of romantic dialogue.

Not asking for advice just putting it out there. This shit is frustrating as fuck sometimes. Ive been away from home for 4 months for work (returning every other weekend) so the lack of sex and mutual bonding with my gf kind of makes it worse.

Probably gonna cut off the old friend for awhile soon.

I don't understand why I did that. My mind was trying to rationalize the situation of me physically dialing the numbers on my phone pad from memory down to what happened today at the veterinary clinic. I'm changing my number this month. I need to stop. You were never my safe space. You never made me feel insecure. I felt lonely and broken and slipped up. I will never let you have that again.

>>18210638
Secure** not "insecure" although I wish that

>>18209971
30 fag here.
Basically all 18 year olds go through this and the ones who have it all figured out are fucking liars or wrong.

Youre 18. Youre inexperienced and brand new to "the real world". Youre inherently stupid (sarry man. Dont mean it offensively its just true. Your brain still developing for another 7 years.)

Let me give you some advice it took me until 2 years ago to start doing, and youll thank me for it later.

Pick a trade skill. Any trade skill. Become a journeyman (4 year apprenticeship). Its like going to school except youll be paid the whole time. Union pays better.

Then when you are a journeyman, you will be guaranteed high paying work any time you want basically for the rest of your life.

THEN figure out what you want to do. Youll be more mature, You can go forward, try whatever, and if you fuck up youll always have your trade skill to fall back on.

You literally cant lose.

>>18210635
>fuck on your couch
Awkward, yet kinky!
I kid, holy shit, you have to tell your roommate to limit this.

Honestly, if I came home to find my couch covered in spunk, I would kill a bitch.

>>18210635
Well, in that case your roommate sounds like a cunt. I've had a fair share of bad roommates myself. I hope you get through it, anon.

Gonna hookup tonight. Fuck this. I deserve a break from all the shit I'm handed

I have a crush on someone i met online. With him I finally get what it means to love someone. It hurts so much that we can never be together because, even if we live in the same area, he'll probably find me as despicable a person irl that I am.

Our interaction just feels so genuine and sweet I find myself going back to the conversations and giggling.

But I can never have this irl. I've fucked up too much with so many burned bridges. It hurts that only now I'm just realizing how much I am / will be missing out. All because of him.

He probably already finds me annoying because I have been acting quite needy. I can never message him again.

>>18210745
She's just really talkative and loves to share every aspect of her life with her friends. It's just her whole life is now revolving around this dude because shes still in that sickening honeymoon phase.
She's just driving me insane with it. She's not a terrible person really, just I have no interest in this part of her life that she won't shut the fuck up about. He'll dump her eventually once he's gotten his jollies out of her, like all college relationships end, and then she'll go back to normal but fuck. Idk if I can wait that long.

.....I still fucking love you.
You heartbreaking bitch.

I wanna eat your pussy until you squirt everywhere

>>18209958
Took the words right out of my mouth, anon

Way to take extra effort to insure I feel more alone than ever.

But I still have Luna, so that's ok.

If you take Luna from me I will fucking murder all of you. I will fucking kill every single fucking mother fucker alive.

>haven't talked to this girl I was really Infatuated with in months
>things fell apart in December
>told her to fuck off in February
>hook up a few times but never fucked her
>led me on and eventually got together with a friend
>seen her a few times because we share the same friend group
>saw her the other night and smoked with her and our friend
>she sent me two texts like an hour ago
>don't think I should answer but curious at the same time

Probably won't text her back but just wanted to tell someone and hear what they have to say.

>>18210446
Major?

I did a maths degree. In 2011. I haven't been to bed before 3-4am for 3 years.

Eloped last year and now feeling like I've made a huge mistake. We've been fighting like crazy lately and everything is pretty much going to shit in both of our lives. I keep wondering if I would have left already if I had somewhere to go. I don't have any friends that can take me in and living with family would be more stressful than staying and trying to work it out. Anyone have suggestions on strengthening a relationship? Or figuring out if I should even put in the effort or just call it quits before it gets worse?

>>18211023
Both of you, sit down together and grab a notepad and a writing utensil. On one side, write "problem" with and underline it, and on the opposite side, write "solution/compromise" and underline as well. Write down your honest opinions on what's tearing you guys apart, and once you two are finished with the "problem" section, try to come up with the "solutions". Who knows, maybe it'll work out in the end, or maybe not.

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>meet girl
>gives me her number
>we talk on the phone until 2 am
>laughed, conversation was really easy
>woke up early looking forward to talk to her
>she cut off contact with me
>went outside to walk and clear my head
>it started raining

ok

My ex treated me bad but I love him and I keep having sexual fantasies about him. I want him back but I don't think that he wants anything to do with me. Anyone know how to get people back? Advice would be greatly appreciated.

>>18210502
What kind of hobbies do you have?

>>18210016
How can you tell that she didn't care?

>>18211125
Conversation? Communication? Just show up at his place and talk to him? See if he wants to talk. At least get some closure so you try to move on if that's what he wants.

>>18211149
I read that you should always wait a month before contacting them. Is that smart?

>>18211169
Who stopped contacting who?

>>18211173
We broke up. I guess he stopped contacting me since he broke up with me. He said that it was a long time coming and that he needed to repair himself and that he was a liar and that I deserved better. He was sad. He hasn't texted me in a little over a week. Every day leading up to the breakup day he told me that he loved me. We even had sex.

Gah I love my girlfriend but she drives me nuts sometimes. She's a very cheerful, sunny person, but whenever we disagree or things aren't perfect and sunny and yippee, she kind of shuts down and it's hard to get us back to a functional norm. I dunno, maybe I'm just exaggerating.

I love her to pieces, and she helps me be cheerful and upbeat instead of just being jaded, but I guess it's a double-edged sword. I just hope that we can work through things. It's hard, emotionally, digging her out with me. I want us to last, but sometimes the world isn't cotton candy and rainbows. We need to be able to get through that together.

>>18211219
>she kind of shuts down
Does she turn cold when you guys get into an argument?

You've been my friend for half my life. It didn't seem like there was any attraction until now. When you finally told me I couldn't have felt more loved.

I know everything is fucked because we had drunk sex, but your words still meant something to me. I meant it when I said I love you. But I'll understand if it's one sided.

At least I know how you really feel and don't have to keep guessing. Small positives.

>>18211225
Yeah, just cools way down and kind of just makes me the only one emoting. I'm not like, blowing up at her or anything, but it's like any time I try to express a negative emotion, she'll express NO emotion until I feel like it's a moot point.

>>18211229
My gf (or ex-gf, I really don't know which one at this point) is like that, and basically, you just need to be patient with her and give her some time to think it through and be sure you tell her that you're giving her the time, or she might misinterpret it as you being cold to her.

>>18211251
Not a bad idea. I think we just process things differently. I don't necessarily want a big, yelly fight, but my family grew up scuffling things out like that and that's the language I know. She's much quieter. I don't want to yell at my girlfriend, but it's like "Gaaah, if you're mad, just fucking say something!"

>>18211187
You could always tell him that you understand that he wants to fix himself, but that you also love him and accepted him as he was/is. That you offer any help that you can give and if he wants space, that sometimes that's okay too.

>school is stressful
>work is extra stressful because it's getting busier (line cook)
>tired 24/7
>too tired to go to the gym
>too tired to play vidya
>too tired to practice piano for more
than 30minutes
>can't stay asleep for more than 2 hours

i feel too tired to enjoy my life. i feel like a zombie

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I still wonder why you decided to help me that day.
Or why you had a change of heart, why we even hung out.
Why we ended up fucking.
I wonder why I got dressed so fast and made a reason to leave.
I wonder why you even kissed me after and why I clammed up.
I guess you're a lot different than I expected, but on the other hand, I have convinced myself I'll never like you like that.
Simply because I know you never wanted that from me.
So maybe that answers a few of my questions.
But it still doesn't help me understand why I'm even still thinking about you.

>>18211237
The number one rule to being friends with a celebrity is you never talk about it, ever

>>18211077
Has pepe really become a symbol for the alt-right and/or nazi's?

We need to take him back.

>>18211269
Im a female line cook in the same situation. I work around 45 hours a week, I go to school for 18 hours and I as well try to go to the gym. It's not easy. I find it helpful after a long shift to take a hot bath while listening to metal. You have to find outlets. Take a benadryl when you can't sleep, drink energy drinks to stay okay during shifts. It'll be okay. You got this. Conquer this issue and make it your bitch. :)

Biz Markie was fucking right. God damn, I didn't think it was going to end like that.

>>18211257
>I don't want to yell at my girlfriend, but it's like "Gaaah, if you're mad, just fucking say something!"

Exactly how I feel, anon. I learned the hard way of why I shouldn't have done that.

>be me, hotheaded as shit
>gf and I argue over something really small and stupid
>yelled at her because I finally snapped after holding my anger in
>gf goes into panic attack mode
>tfw you hurt the one person that loves you the most
>calm her down eventually

>>18211268
I really wish that it was that simple. I have too much pride to talk to him yet. I hope he is okay. I don't want to seem clingy. I want him to have space. I also want him back. It's tough.

>>18211299
Glad you patched up the situation anon. You're right though, I'm scared of blowing up at her. Lately a bunch of little things have been annoying me. I want to express my concerns but keep things proportional. Just gotta stay cool

>>18210430
Talk to her...

I'm sorry for acting like I don't care about you guys and play it as a joke. I know that it lost its wittiness a while ago. I know you begin to wonder why I even hang out with you. Or why you should bother being around me. The truth is I really don't give a fuck about you. The other truth is I wish I would. I really like you guys and want to care more about you.

>>18211288
Remember in 2011-2013 when he was just a green, funny looking frog cartoon?

Things were simpler back then.

>>18211322
My advice for you, anon, is to ask yourself "is this really worth getting upset about?" whenever you get annoyed, but it's bad to bottle it up as well. Just be honest with her, and have her help you out with whatever you're dealing with.

>>18211257
She probably knows that if she does speak up it won't calm the situation down

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>>18209951

>>18211344
That's definitely a thought I've been having, but it's more the combination of a few things that makes one issue (Namely "Sometimes it feels like you don't listen to me or consider things I've said I don't like multiple times.") and that's grating on me.

>>18211362
You might be right. I guess it's just my fault for being accustomed to more...lively negotiations of problems...

>>18210958
Who the fuck are you. You don't know Luna. You can't take her away from me.

>>18211307
>pride
This is why you fail.
Sometimes you have to separate yourself from it.

A good relationship requires that both parties know when to compromise when to hold back their pride. Around your partner you shouldn't need pride. Not too much of it. A bit is fine, but it gets in the way of you communicating, it's a detriment.

But if he needs time, if you honestly feel that will help. Take this time away from him to search inside yourself. Find your flaws and work on them. Better yourself as a person. Separate yourself from your ego and try to see your actions as a third person would.

Try to grow from this then, don't simply wait, make yourself a person he would happy return to.

Do watch your pride, trust me, it can cost you what you treasured most. It's not fun. At all.

>>18211378
I will never stop trying to better myself. I just don't understand why he wouldn't have texted me yet... Does he not care? That's where I get scared.

>>18211219
You sound like me and my bf. If shes like me she stops talking so you'll shut the fuck up. For a sunny cheery person to be around a negative yelling one, its seriously exhausting. And eventually all the complaining just ruins your mood and day. If you talk back, the fighting gets worse, if you yell back, the fighting gets worse. So she goes into quiet mode in hopes that you'll just stop. Appreciate it while it lasts, she'll eventually snap like I did and you wont see it coming, nor will you see her planning her escape to find someone sunny like her who can see the silver lining.

Not sure if this is true for her but she sounds just like me and thats why I go in shut down mode. Mental and emotional self preservation

>Random 8/10 chick started talking to me in class.
>I'm just a skinny average looking dude
>she's hot, a lot of slutty pics on herself on her fb
>she Intitates conversation twice with me

Is she interested? Is this enough of a green light to ask her for her number?

Hey /adv/ i need your help.

there is this person who i was really close to but due to fights and unfair treatment i stopped talking to the person. Also because the person moved to another country,


I had a very deep emotional connection with that person and felt as if that person was somewhat my other half although we're from the same sex.

I miss that person so much, though i try to forget that person since it's been somewhat 3+ years since that person left.
How do i completely shut this feeling of missing out? We have a very clear reason why we don't talk anymore but i can't bare the feel of missing the person....


ANY TIPS on how to get rid of the feels or letting the person go are welcome!!!!
Thanks

>>18211450
doesn't sound like you should

>>18211413
Yes ask for her number.

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I danced to music today.

I think I'm coming out of my depression.

If you're up there, God, thank you.

>>18211456

how come? i had my fair share of dreams and feeling sad and i do want to get over it for god's sake

*no hard feels*

I think my times up really. I'm 26, been stuffering from severe depression from 13 and aside from extreme treatments I've done it all. Not just pills but the work outs, diets, getting out.

Even if I get cured or even the symptoms of this, my multiple anxieties and other issues treated...I have no skills. I don't even know how to drive. I have no clue either. I don't own much, so getting started on anything going to be hard.

Socially I'm drained, I've got friends but feel lonely yet I can't tell anyone about this. And then of course through all this my body and mind decide to fall for a girl. I tried to woo her since I known her for a while, eventually got rejected.

Though I may not have to end it myself. This Friday I have a neck and then brain MRI. They are looking for MS and a few other fatal/near fatal conditions because recently started showing some bad signs.

Of course no one been told this.

>>18211464
We didn't really speak long at all and I didn't think much of it at first. But I see her tomorrow morning so I'll say some shit to her and take it from there.

>>18211385
>Does he not care? That's where I get scared.
It is terrifying. Just try to hold your yourself back for a bit. Just relax. Paranoia is something that will eat you up inside. It's not easy, but don't fuck up by saying something you can't take back.

You have to separate yourself from your over powering emotions and fear. Look at them as another would. When you feel like shit, when you miss him, go out for a walk. Read a book, play some music. I know it doesn't fully stay the feelings, but you have to so you don't push him away.

If it was a neutral break-up. Make sure you make your feelings known to him. Make your stand and wait.
You have to wait. If he comes back, try again. If not. Steel your heart, as the road ahead is long, dark, lonely and painful. Very much so.

I fucking hate my first cat 90% of the time. He tears at my carpet, furniture, pisses on things, and fights with the nice cat so much he draws blood. I want to take him to a no kill shelter because he's so happy when he's outside(something I can't give him) and seems to need a single pet home.
We've had him for a year and a half and hes my husband's and I first pet together. My husband does NOT want to even talk about getting rid of him, but has not once did the litter box or cared for him in anyway. I'm fucking tired.

>>18209999
If you have a background in cs you'll be valuable as a journalist in an entirely different way. There are always low level cs jobs you can do to pay the bills, even without a degree. Do what you love

>>18211479
I just wish I understood how he felt right now. That uncertainty is holding me back. So should I wait a month before I contact him? I think I'd feel more secure that way

I get the feeling I've been chasing after someone my whole life and they're *this close*

You are a whore. You will always be a whore and nothing you do will ever not make you a whore. No matter what you buy, where you go, what you wear, what you say, how you live your life, you are nothing but a whore. I hate you. I hate that he chose to be with you of all people. An honest to God whore. In the shower. On the bed. Recording everything. Taking pictures. I will make him repent for it the rest of his life if need be.
But there is no saving you. You have sex with men for money and to be on camera. You're trash. Why? Because at the end of the day you will grow old and shriveled and get no one exited. What will you have to show for your time except a hallway for a vagina and skepticism amongst partners that you are clear of STDs? Sooner or later we get older and seek companionship. True relationships that can last. What you offer, is meaningless. It's commercialized sex. You are not a person but a humanized masturbation tool. The world is better off rid of you.

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Story time.

Meet hot guy off tinder
After confessing about how shit my day has been losing something, how I've recently gotten out of something awful months ago, we finally met up after I put it off for so long.
We went to the river, it was kind of cold. He enjoyed my high socks, my mannerisms, me. I liked his bare skin, his muscles, his smile. After talking I randomly grabbed his throat as my intention was to choke him. We kissed, I grabbed his cock through his jeans. "This is so embarrassing!" My noises slip out. Feels cash. Next thing I know my hands are in his pants, next thing I'm ripping his jeans off. Hands explore underneath his shirt on accident trying to fish for his cock, feel his abs. Feels nice. He takes my top off and I try to cover myself with my arms. "Please don't tease me" he attempts to dominate me, twists my nipple rings. Decide it's time for me to dominate for once. Now I'm on top. Been months since I've been fucked. Couldn't really fit it, had to suck him off a bit before I could slide down on it. I almost screamed but bit my lip instead because fucking in public is so embarrassing, why would I want to draw attention to myself? Yeah, no thanks. My nipple rings on display, I'm riding his cock, thick thighs grasping his hips. He pulled my face down to kiss me. So flattered. We wound up cumming at the same time, him inside of me.
I'm not on birth control. He's my third body.
All my mind fades to is someone making me cum after 2 years. His fingers brushing my scars. His hands playing with my hair. His fingers in my mouth playing with my drooling tongue. I hope he let's me peg him soon. He'd be a great new FWB.

>>18211501
If it's what you feel. Go with it.
Take the time to relax and grow yourself.

>I just wish I understood how he felt right now
I know that feel. In a strange way being away from the one I lost made me understand them, but it cost so much to gain this knowledge.

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>>18211515

>>18211526
Thank you for the advice. I appreciate it. I'm going to wait it out. After a month I'm going to invite him to lunch.

>>18211541
Good luck anon.
It hurts, but if it works out, hope you can learn from it all and make things better.

You are one of the most passive aggressive people I know and you think everything I do is to try to piss you off. Maybe shit is fucked up and saying anything about what is fucked up will make it worse like it always does. Maybe that's what you want so you can help the great just cause of speculation and sensationalism. I'm glad you feel good about pretending to be a good person by shedding all your actions in the most positive way when you have negative intentions hidden behind them at every turn. You're a combination of fakeness to avoid negative consequences combined with the realness to shed your negativity on everything around you.

Might be a little long so apologies. I have a close friend and we would hangout all the time. We have a big friend group that splits into smaller groups so there can be a lot of people involved. One night me and her got to talking and we starting sleeping with each other labeling it as friends with benefits.

Anyways, I catch feelings for her and I get jealous when we are out and she's flirting it up in front of me with other guys which is her natural personality (not saying its good) but she flirts with everyone. We even flirt to this day but not as much as we use to. She gets pissed that I'm getting jealous yet when I would hangout with the girls in our group she would get jealous and give me attitude but fails to recognize it. We resolve things and continue sleeping with each other (bad mistake?) and eventually we talk it out about our feelings.

Here is where I don't understand. She tells me I am a grey area and doesn't know what to think if we could have a relationship yet we still fuck. But there is this other guy in a group that clicks really well with her and always has. They have a lot of sexual chemistry but they both don't see it. She tells me that he is 'end game' so she doesn't want to date him because she doesn't want a relationship. They text all the time as 'friends' but I know moments when he 'jokingly' gets mad at me for spending a lot of time with her because the joke in our group is that they are already a couple. Yet I can see he is actually a little pissed.

Our relationship went kind of rocky when I told her I had feelings for her and she said she didn't for me but its getting better now. We both agreed we should stop sleeping with each other but oh god do I still want to. When we hangout there is still some sexual chemistry but I notice her pull back all the time.

Don't really know what I'm asking, maybe I just wanted to get this off my chest. Comment too long so I will continue a little

>>18211565
Don't Bother. You're both ratchet and we dc

>>18211475
About my usual amount of replies.

I took the cover off of my rice after only 10 minutes; I'm so pissed

>>18210016
That's all fine and dandy, just don't tell me I'm the one who left when in the end it was your choice.

>>18211515
Bitch you nasty.
Where do you live?

>>18211715
anon i love you

>>18211187
Sounds like he cheated on you. Is probably already dating another girl.

>>18211465
This makes me unbelievably happy to read. Keep your head up anon!

>>18211718
Save it for later.
Where do you live?

>>18211731
Newport News, VA

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>>18211515
Jesus fuck.

>>18211733
Pff ain't worth it.

>>18209951
I don't know why but I just can't cum while having sex. Fapping goes just fine but when I'm actually fucking a girl it takes forever and I run out of energy.

I want a job in retail. The only job I ever had is property management which I've done since 2010 to 2015. The rest of the year I went to community college full time to complete it which I did, but still need to apply for my associate degree grad. I need a job in retail because I need the experience. I'm terrible at writing a resume. I need help, but never ask because I hate to ask for help. I've been turned down 5 times. I've applied to a pet store job (which probably turned me down because of my terrible looking resume, a regular store that sells food (walmart, food4less, etc), and electronic stores (bestbuy and gamestop). Looking for an anon to help me look at my resume and critique it.

I have no idea where else to post this...so I guess i'll post it here.

This has been plaguing me: Where do fake facebook accounts get pictures of all those cute girls? Do they just steal them from people off their actual facebooks? Or are they like stock photo models or something

I wish she treated me the way girls I don't want to date treat me

I have such low confidence in what my plans are after graduation and whether I'll even go anywhere in life.
Here's to me finding some kind of clear focus in all this shit.

I love you. How can I make you love me back?

I want to be with you and be loved by you so badly ;_;

>>18211813
>that feel

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The happiest I have ever been in my 23 years of existence, was when I was living at my aunt's place, about 3 years ago, and got to spend a lot of time with my back then, 8 and 10 year old cousins. They became like little sisters to me, and I for the first time in my life, got to feel what genuine affection felt and how it was like to have somebody who truly desired to be in my company.
I loved those two girls, and still do. There was nothing better in the world for me, than just spending time with them, and enjoying their company and affection. They made me feel wanted, and worthwhile as a person, and made me want to be a good role model for them.
That was the best time of my life.

Even after the time I spent at my aunt's place, me and my cousins still kept in touch. We called each other, and they sent pictures and whenever there was a family gathering, or a visit, we spent time together.
Unfortunately, it all came to an end last year, when my aunt basically called me a pedophile, and claimed that I had molested the girls, and that I was making them anxious and uncomfortable.
I cut contact with her, because of how offended and hurt I was by those accusations, and after that, I didn't see my cousins for over a year, until this weekend.

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>>18211819
Few days ago, there was a family gathering, where my aunt and my cousins as well came. While I did avoid my aunt due to how uncomfortable and angry being around her made me feel, I could not avoid my cousins.
The younger girl, now 12 still sought my company, like she had done before but because of the whole pedophilia accusation in the air, I could not be as close to her as I had been.
When she at one point, barged into my room, I had to shoo her off, because the last thing I wanted was to be seen alone with her in my room. It visibly upset her, and later she asked why I was angry at her. I of course told her that I wasn't angry, but I couldn't really tell her the real reason why I didn't want her in my room.
She also tried to sit on my lap at one point, but I didn't let her. I did end up spending time with her though, and sitting next to her on a sofa, drawing together. She rested her head against me for a moment, and when they were about to leave, we hugged and I told her that I had missed her.
A moment later, downstairs, she hugged others, but not me, possibly because her mother was there.

All in all, the wounds that had already somewhat closed, were re-opened this weekend. I had almost forgotten how much I missed my cousins, and how much I wanted them back to my life. Now I again, remember, and I feel like utter shit.

I want to spend time with my cousins. I want to once again, be able to hug them, lift them up and spin them around, and cuddle with them. I love those girls. They were the light of my life. I wish things could go back to how they once were, but I know that is impossible.

>>18211813
Get over it desu. What does she have that one billion other girls dont have?

Seriously, name ONE thing that is 100% unique to her, one trait anything. The fact that she gave you attention at one point? (that's usually what it is)

>>18211727

Thank you, really. I got sober a few weeks ago and am getting my shit straight. Feels weird, but in a good way.

I am sooo horny. It's not fair that I have a bf and he's not having sex with me. Especially when I could so easily find it somewhere else. I even ended things with my fuck buddy so I could date this guy. I know sex isn't that important, but I really want it from him.

You crazy cunt I want to use you! Come to my house and get dirty, I know you need it.

>>18211824
It's not a girl. It's a trap.

Even worse because I don't know how to make her attracted to me, she's not the same as a normal girl.

You're a bitch but I miss you.

Why our friendship had to end just because you threw a fit over my lack of care about the way chicken nuggets are prepared by companies is beyond me, but I guess not having to deal with a shallow vegan idiot will be better in the long run for me. I just wish I didn't miss you like I do.

>>18211844
plenty of other traps bro, hit up POF. That being said tho, if you can't even make it with a trap (some of the most desperate attention starved people on planet earth) then you need some work, and you should then be focusing on yourself instead of a mate

>>18211845
so poetic, so stoic, much wow

I'm sorry I didn't really respond when you said you loved me. It's way too early for that. I'm definitely not ready to say it back. Just know that I really do care about you, and I like you a lot. But it'll be some time before we can take it to that level.

Sometimes I like to come to this one website, and this one board and I click on this one thread. And I ask myself, can fully functioning adults really be this melodramatic? I feel like it's a highschool simulator when I visit this certain thread.

>>18211919
That's adulthood for ya'. We never truly grow up.

>>18211844
>trap
You lost me, I do not know that particular feek

>her
>she's
Don't feed its delusions.

>not the same as a normal girl
That's because it's not a girl at all.

>>18210636
I've been in that kind of situation, I can give you an insight on how the other girl feels if she is a decent person. It was terrible. I felt like I was a monster for making two nice people break things off. But, don't cut off the other friend, if you can. If she's a good friend shes going to suffer if you just stop talking to her or stuff without an explanation, if you feel like you can't go on, tell her how you feel and then tell her you are going to be more distant.
Relationships are hard

Sabrina

Fuck you whore. You lied to me you told me you weren't like other people. But then you fucked me over. Fuck you cunt. I'm glad I made you get a new number, fb and everything. You deserved it whore

D,

You fucked up like the last whore. I'm giving you one more chance this weekend. Don't be a cunt, but desu I think you're an attention whore who is over selling yourself. You're on the downhill side of 20, your past guys aren't all that great. You have one more chance with me otherwise I'm gone.

Me

Fucking idiot. Give up on people already.

how to get over your dad?


Im a 20 year young lady. My dad is a horrible person and didn't spend any free time with me, left me with my brother, without a rolemodel as a dad.

A couple of weeks ago i decided that he had fucked me over 1 time to many so i blocked him and decided not to tak to him anymore...


Anyone experienced something similar and if so --->

tips on how to survive life without dad?

>>18211488
>he's so happy when he's outside
yeah, you'd go fucking nuts if you were allowed a taste of freedom outside of prison and then locked up again

>>18212017

lol roastie problems. Try growing up without one. As in I haven't herd from him in 20 years. Stop being a petty cunt and just ignore him. I'm sure you have "daddy issues" already so go fuck jemal.

>>18212039
thanks anon, this is the pep talk i needed
but, don't you feel fucked up sometimes?


like,how do you ignore that feel ?
Where can i buy that icy heart?

My life is just pure shit now

Everything was fine in the past. But now, I almost want to end myself. What the fuck is going on...

>>18212043

Oh I feel fucked up all the time. And I ignore the feel with self loathing, masochism and substance abuse.

What I would have given to have a normal family growing up. Or maybe I'd still be this fucked up if he hung around. Idk. Do whatever you want. Block him and just do it. Wishy washyness is a terrible thing.

>>18212055
thank you anon <3 this helps

>>18212058

Np. Gl in your problems. Hope they work out better than mine did.

>>18211130
Hema, painting, recently bone carving

>>18211819
>>18211820
Someone pls respond

>>18211715
You, too.

>>18211733
Wew, lad. Not even close. What software are you using?

>>18212075
But we did ;_;

>>18211820
bruh,i feel bad for you. nieces and nephews are the best because they're still nice persons full of innocence.


I really hope your aunt is going to act normal again if you're right. I really hope the vibe can be restored as it once was.


It's horrible that you have to go through this.


HOLD ON, THERE WILL BE BETTER TIMES

>>18212095
I hope so too, but I doubt things will ever go back to how they once were. My aunt is stubborn and will probably never admit to being wrong.

>>18212095


No, no, no, no! Search the archives for cousin lover and your opinion will change. This person is not innocent and the Aunt's accusations are not unfounded. IMO, he needs to be locked up and the key thrown away. This person is sick- mentally ill- and should never be allowed to be alone with those children.

WHY AM I SO FUCKING IMPULSIVE AND STUPID I AM GOING TO RUIN THIS FUCK WHY THE FUCK AM I LIKE THIS FUCK FUCK FUCK

I miss you. I wake up every day feeling the emptiness in my chest where the connection with you was. A long time has passed. Will I ever see you again? Will this feeling that has held on for so long ever dissipate? Was I really so wrong about you? Did you really never care about me at all?

I'm terrified to tell people that I might be depressed. I can't base this off any professional diagnosing, but all the stuff I've read online leads to this conclusion. I find it absolutely pathetic that I'm using the internet to self diagnose myself like some kind of hypochondriac, but ever since last spring, I've lost complete interest in everything. School, hobbies, work, friends. I still act like my old self to hide this fact, but recently it's gotten really fucking hard to tolerate the same things I use to enjoy the hell out of. I can't even count the amount of times I wasted just laying in bed vainly thinking "would anyone even miss me" and I fucking hate myself for it. Suicidal thoughts run aplenty, though I'd never try anything because 1) I'm weak and 2) dying is expensive and I'd rather not make my family suffer financially if I can help it.

Every time I think about confiding in one of my friends (family is totally out of the question) my chest physically hurts. It's disgusting that I'm coming to such a bullshit conclusion due to some stupid information I found online to excuse my own laziness. I also feel like a piece of shit for not admitting these stupid fucking thoughts to anyone; I've known most of my friends for almost 10 years and still even hang out weekly. I chide them for keeping secrets and not telling the truth about how they really feel all the damn time but here I am, a huge fucking hypocrite.

I'm such a fucking idiot. I'll probably just look back on this in a few years and realize what a selfish cunt I was being and be glad I never told anyone.

>>18211819
>>18211820
If you really are what this guy said
>>18212151
Go get help. I think I said it even in another thread, get fuckin help, as in go to a psych and tell them that you have an abnormal attraction for your much younger cousins. Your reputation is already ruined, get help before the frustration makes you do something shitty. Just the way you talk about them makes it clear its not just some normal affection for your younger cousins, please get help instead of doing something stupid or be remembered as the kinda creepy pedo uncle
>>18212207
Get help, its the only way out. You don't need to talk about it with your friends but you sure as fuck need to talk about it with a doctor. Dont fall into the antidepressants hole unless its the only option, but do what you must to get better, I'm sure you can do it.

>>18212207
There is nothing wrong with being sad
There is nothing wrong with taking care of yourself
There is nothing wrong with asking for help

Even a month ago, I was like you. Lost. No taste in everything, but pretending that everything was fine. I managed to get out of this by speaking with a friend (I know you will not read this E, but you probably saved my life). Even if, sometimes, I feel lost, sad or anything, I still pretend that everything is fine, but I know that I can send a message to E, and she will be there, listening, helping me to not fall in the abyss. She is in the same situation, but she know that she can just ask for help, and I'll be there too.

Come one, find a good friend, one that will never let you down. That will never judge you for anything. And tell him.

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>>18212219
>>18212229

Thank you, anons.
You're both very kind.

THIS SHITTY FUCKING BIRD KEEPS WAKING ME UP. I LITERALLY GOT TWO HOURS OF SLEEP BEFORE THE CUNT FUCK WOKE ME UP A FUCKING GAIN. BITCH. NOW I CANT GO BACK TO SLEEP. I SWEAR ON MY CUNT MOTHERS WHORE LIFE I WILL KILL THAT FUCKING BIRD. I WILL KILL THAT FUCKING BIRD AND TORTURE THE FUCK OUT OF IT. I'VE ALREADY THOUGHT ABOUT THE MILLIONS OF WAYS I WOULD KILL THAT FUCKING CUNT. YOU KNOW HOW THERES COUNTING SHEEP TO SLEEP? IVE BEEN COUNTING DEAD FAGGOT BIRDS. ALL THE WAYS I WOULD FUCKING SHOOT THE FAGGOT IN THE FUCKING BRAIN OR ITS STUPID LITTLE FUCKING BODY THEN TORTURE THE FUCK OUT OF IT. 157 TIMES. THERE ARE 157 WAYS I WOULD KILL THAT BITCH. I SWEAR TO GOD. DO NOT PISS ME OFF TODAY. I WILL BEAT YOUR FUCKING ASS. IN FACT DONT PISS ME OFF EVER. I WILL IMAGINE YOU AS THIS FUCKING BITCH CREATURE AND I WILL FUCKING LITERALLY MURDER YOU. OR I WILL JUST BEAT THE FUCKING SHIT OUT OF YOU. I DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT JAIL. I WILL LITERALLY GO TO JAIL TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF SOMEONE WHO FUCKING PISSES ME OFF LIKE THAT IDIOT FUCKING BIRD. FUCK YOU. FUCK EVERYONE. FUCK BIRDS. I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL KILL THAT FUCKING BITCH I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL KILL IT

I fuck him now because your dick be broken, pal.

Also, I want to break up for good but I am a cowardly whore. Oh well I'll continue to date other people for now.

>>18212151
> This person is not innocent and the Aunt's accusations are not unfounded
The fuck?
I never did anything bad to my cousins. Not a fucking thing, unless you count hugs and cuddling as something irredeemably bad.

And my aunt's accusations are entirely unfounded, especially now, that my younger cousin made it evidently clear that my aunt was full of shit when she claimed that I was making my cousins uncomfortable and anxious.
Last weekend, I tried to avoid my cousins because of my aunt's accusations, but the younger girl still sought to be in my company.
It is blatantly obvious that she was in no way, anxious and uncomfortable in my company, which lifted a tremendous burden from my heart, as for the past year, I had been afraid that maybe my aunt was right and that I had just missed the signs.

> This person is sick- mentally ill- and should never be allowed to be alone with those children.
I am sick, but not in the way you think.
I have been suffering from depression for almost 5 years now, 2 of those I didn't even know I had it. During that time, the girls were the only source of happiness I had in my life, so it is not a big fucking surprise I got attached to them.
And I was alone with my cousins many dozens of times during the span of the last 3 years, and I never did anything to them. If I was some sort of pedophile monster like you and my aunt accuse me of being, I would have had ample opportunities to hurt those girls, but I never did, because I am not a fucking pedophile, and I'd never hurt my cousins.

>>18212219
That guy is full of shit.
And get help for what? My depression? Because I am already seeing a therapist, and he knows of this issue as well. And I have no attraction towards my cousins. I may have an "abnormal" attachment to them, but that doesn't mean I'd do "something shitty".
I respected my aunt's desire to cut contact with the girls for over a year, and it was not my choice to see them again.

Don't hold onto things that hurt you. Unless you're at the gym, then just focus on proper form.

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>>18209951
My cat hates me. I bought her as a rescue a year ago right after my girlfriend left to try and help the loneliness. I got fired over bullshit and had to do graveyard shift, and tried to get her to trust me. She fucking hates me. She's terrified of me. I try to pick her up and she panics, her heart rate shoots way up, she cries and claws me trying to escape.
She loves my sister and mom, she snuggles with them all the time and is so playful. And she runs from me. She hides.
I don't know what I did to make her fear me. I don't want her to be scared of me, I want her to love me like I do her.

Why haven't I killed myself yet? I can't even get a fucking kitten to like me, much less a woman to stay with me.

Caught me brother peeping on my mom while she was in the bathroom and found a video on our tablet he recorded of her getting ready for a shower.....He's 24 I'm 22 so it's not young and curious. It makes me wanna vomit and beat the living shit out of him every time I think about it and I don't know what the fuck to do. I've been struggling with depression for 5-6 years and this really fucked me up I wanna see a therapist but idk if they could even help so yeah fuck me

>>18212292
Keep socializing with her. Sometimes it takes a bit of time, that's all. If anything, rehome her and find a friendlier kitten or opt for a reptile. Bearded dragons make good pets. I'm unsure if you have the time for one considering they need to be misted to keep a certain humidity but pet stores sell automated foggers and misters for that sort of situation.

>>18212299
She comes up to me and I put out my hand to smell it, and she does, then retreats away and gets scared. Because she smells I'm a man. She runs from all men.

I can't rehome her because 1: goes against the terms and conditions of the adoption and 2: my mom and sister love her. I can't get another because my sister has 2 already. After all the gf and friends betrayals I've had this one hurts the worst.

>>18212274
Go away, I also remember you, that thread went downhill fast for you.

>>18212344
Why should I go anywhere?

>>18212263
Do you take his dick in your ass?

The longer she makes me wait the more i notice her flaws. She has pretty eyes and a pretty smile but other than that shes not that hot. Shes getting old and saggy. She has a drug addiction. She's too old to give me a baby. She is not as into me as i need her to be. She cheated on me before and will 100% do it again. When the time comes she knows what she needs to do. She needs to leave. I wont make her but i will be very disappointed in her if she doesnt.

Meanwhile im getting pretty /fit/ and regaining my confidence. Im going to keep looking for someone younger who is absoluetly crazy about me to settle down with.

>>18211719
How could you assume that

>>18211919
I feel like I know what thread you're talking about.

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>>18212274
Doncha know anon, if a man as much as looks at a little girl, he's automatically a pedophile!

i just feel so... defeated. for lack of a better term.

i recently "got fired" after being treated like shit for 4 years, never being paid, and expected to preform like a robot for 8-15 hours a day.

i had plans of joining the military, but recently found out i have a few medical conditions that DQ me, so now i cant even do that.

i feel like im running on the hamster wheel. im turning 24 next month, and legit, i have nothing to show for anything. im just so lost and overloaded i don't know what to do, i don't know who i am anymore. the drive to keep trying is gone.

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I frequent here trying to assist others with their issues in order to cope with my own lack of purpose, but it's slowly catching up with me.
I can no longer ignore these bloodlust tenancies whenever I see gore, an urge to lash out that tingles at my fingertips, these impulses of sadness, jealousy, an absolute emptiness that overtakes all emotions at will, my instability is beginning to take its toll.
I can no longer feel satisfaction with any hobbies, attempting to integrate into society and associate with my peers is making me sick. The fact that I have to don a mask in order to be understood and accepted due to my real personality and desires being too alienating to be understood by others is making me feel crippling anxiety, isolation and pain.
I hate self diagnosing, but I feel like I'm suffering from Schizotypal Personality Disorder. It's been creeping up on me for the past 4 years and only gets worse by the day.
Even romance, the one thing that I hold dear to myself, that I cherish and appreciate above all else, is starting to look perverse. The potential lies and deceit from someone who you could care for above all else, that kind of betrayal would be enough to push me over the edge of no return.
I have no idea what I'm doing typing all of this, I feel like I just need to talk to someone about my problem instead of assisting others with theirs, I've been losing myself and never came to terms with it until I finished writing this post. I hope someone understands this.

>>18212274
Stop playing stupid and innocent. I remember you admitting to popping a woody with your cousin wiggling on your lap! I also remember your refusal to discussing the issue with your therapist. Prison would be too nice for you....

>>18212670
You have to be open to letting people help you. Whether it's a therapist, a good friend or whoever. Bottling things up and letting things fester is the one of the worst things you can do. Getting a diagnosis doesn't make you weak. You have to be aware of a problem before you can begin to fix it. Not trying to tell you what to do, it's just that I've been more or less in the same boat and understand where you're coming from. Best of luck

>>18212434
Because he called himself a liar. He sounds more upset than he would over just realizing they're not compatible. He probably cheated and feels guilty about it, so he ended it with her. Especially with how sudden it was.

I'm sorry for what I've done to you. I hate that I brought up an argument with you, and that this argument bred more and more mistakes from me. The shit I put you through these past few days were not worth it. I wanted to fight for us, but not like this. You played me like a fiddle and chose to fuck with my emotions like a lab rat. You distanced yourself away from me to see if I'd come running back, and I did every time. I don't know if you were smart in doing that to reduce the blow on you, or if you're a complete idiot for thinking it won't hurt me more. I'm sorry I forced you to call it off with me earlier than expected. You decided to break up with me for valid reasons, and I respect that. Just don't pull some shit on me saying you couldn't wait any longer for that day so you do it now. I'm a mess because of you.
But I still love you all the same. Hope we can still be friends.

>>18212838
He's not the type of person that would ever cheat. He's not social either. He lives with his mom so cheating wouldn't be practical.

E,

I do not know why I am still so conflicted when it comes to you, as you ended it years ago.

It took me time, but I am finally moving on, and not forcing myself to. There were a couple girls, but I was just going through the motions. That said, I met someone a couple months ago, and the connection between us is, at least, as strong as ours was; I was absolutely shocked.

We are getting a place together next month, and these past months have been a whirlwind. They have also caused me to reflect on all of the mistakes I made when we were together, and how I hurt you.

You were the best, and worst thing, that ever happened to me. You will always have a piece of my heart.

I am sorry for not being the man I am now when I was with you, and I hope you find happiness.

Self-masturbatory nerd internet culture is creating monsters made of cringe and second-hand embarrassment. And people outside the internet is having to deal with their bollocks.

Do you know how annoying it is to hear those guys trying to look cool but actually being lame and causing everyone else more second-hand embarrassment than Donald Trump pretending to be pro-feminism?

Internet nerd culture has to end. For the nerds' own good. You guys are sabotaging yourselves by being cringey.

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>>18212509
Some of the people here are indeed starting to sound like that character.

>>18212813
Yeah, getting a semi due to physical contact is completely indicative of pedophilia, and not just a result of body reacting to something it has never quite experienced before.
And I have talked about this with my therapist, you dumb cunt.

Why should I be sent to prison? I have done absolutely nothing wrong here. I am not a pedophile, as I am not sexually attracted to children. For fuck's sake, I had a crush on a girl my age last year, that unfortunately never went anywhere because I was too shy to really pursue her. I haven't touched my cousins inappropriately or any shit like that, so what exactly, is the crime I have committed?
You think that me getting a stiffy due to my cousin wriggling around on my lap once, is an offence so gruesome that "prison would be too nice" for me?

Also, besides, if I had actually hurt my cousins somehow, and made them uncomfortable and anxious, then WHY IN THE HELL, would they still seek my company, like they, especially the younger one, did during the family gathering last weekend?
The younger girl fucking barged into my room when I went there to get some of my stuff, almost the moment I closed the door behind me. I had to shoo her out, which visibly upset her.
She WANTED to be in my company, despite my aunt claiming that the girls were uncomfortable around me.
Would a child that was uncomfortable, or anxious around someone seek his/her company?

>>18212999 (checked)
The IRL memespewers are hipster faggots doing it to be le post-ironic and meta. The actual "nerds" sit in their holes and code all day.

I feel like I'm starting to lose my grip on reality

I usually try very hard to be above this, but I just told an anon I was arguing with to kill himself and then said the same thing to two more in as many minutes, man it feels good, kill yourselves.

>>18213012
Okay, less like "nerds" and more like "dweebs". Because if we're going to be technical here, those people aren't exactly smart, but think they're smart just because they liked to read Plato for a Philosophy essay or something like that.

>>18212923
You know better than that. It happened before and we spoke, we both saw that we couldn't be just friends. It has always been together, or not. I played with your emotions, I see that I did and I destroyed the beautiful person I fell for so many years ago. I warped you, and in the process myself. It took such a big shock to finally see the fuck up I created.

Part of me wanted you to fight back, to stand up and just say no. To show me resistance. I guess I broke you down so much that you could no longer stand. In my demented ways, I have always loved you. I still do, I just had trouble getting out correctly.

I hope things are going good for you. Maybe after some time we can talk and listen to each other. Learn and grow into stronger people and try a new. Maybe.

My heart hurts, but I caused all this. I need to see that. I hurt you, that much I know. I will be here for you. All you simply need to do is talk. I made this mess, I want to be there and fight to fix it.

i fucking hate how fucked up i get when we don't speak
i thought i'd moved on from you ages ago but when i think you're ignoring me i let it get to my head so hard
do you know that you do this to me? did you mean to fucking ruin my life?
i'm so tired of feeling so unlovable

>>18212999
it's created an entire generation of nerds who only know how to relate through materalism and don't understand how to develop real connections beyond "we both think dank memes are funny and both are wearing a star wars tshirt we're besties now!"

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>>18213081
Dank meems are the best though famalam.

it just really fucking hurts right now. I didn't want to go this way. i told myself i'd stop drinking but now i'm going to die because of it. i have nobody else with me right now. i'm going to die all alone. im not gonna make it to the hospital. i dont wanna die yet

Somebody became legitimately afraid of me once I told them I had schizotypal personality disorder. They said they were freaking out IRL and I had to try to manage the situation and assure them everything was ok and that I would leave them alone.

I did not realize it was possible to be half as insulted as I am over the fact that this happened. I am furious. I was actually treated like I was this crazy dangerous person. And yes I do try to dress well and take care of my appearance so that wasn't playing a role in throwing them off. Despite all evidence to the contrary that I was completely fine I was treated this way. I take medication for this so all of that is under control.

They have actually blocked me on facebook and I wish there was something I could do to reach them about this. I want to give them a piece of my mind about this because this was horribly degrading. I want justice over this.

I wonder what will happen if they ever try to hit me up again. I don't know if I would be welcoming or cold and distant. It's funny how this is the second time and you guys said you regretted the first time and that you felt guilty. Why the fuck did you shut me out? We were all happen then just poof. I knew he would most likely leave too, it was mainly a matter of when. It's funny how I thought him and I were actually going to be alright since I was watching his stream then you joined, he went quiet, and fucking blocks me. You know what, maybe I tried to talk to you too much, I don't know. But you didn't have the balls to talk to me and have a civil discussion. I'm upset still, but I hope you guys have bright futures.

>>18213076
no
could ask you the same in all honesty

>>18212433
Are you with her or is this just someone you hooked up with once!

>>18213076
You told me you needed to be left alone. I could spend every waking moment with you and never get bored, it's a shame really, you don't want me to have those feelings or look at you that way. You have no idea how lonely and bored I am.

>>18212670
Don't self diagnose just do what you enjoy and do what is necessary. Everyone has a mask that they use, but we're all still people. You can express yourself and you just have to practice. Your personality and interests probably aren't so alienating. When you see gore why don't you try empathizing with how the victim must have felt and put yourself in his shoes?

My ex called me a couple weeks ago contemplating suicide. She said she wanted to say goodbye to me one last time before she cut her wrists with a knife I had gotten her for personal protection. It's her birthday this upcoming week. Should I text her and wish her a happy birthday and say I hope she's doing okay?

>>18213343
Text her happy birthday and that you hope she is doing well then go no contact again.

>>18213343
to iterate I talked her down but the next day I asked how she was doing and she asked me to leave her alone.

>>18213347
Okay.

>>18211077
>all those moments will be lost in time.. Like feels, in rain..

>>18212923
>>18213045
Something else. My mind has been slightly off, I forgot something so simple.

I'm sorry. I fucked up. I want to make it up to you.

I'm sorry.

>>18213229
What do you mean hooked up with once? Like a one night stand? No.

my bf acts like I'm mean to his dog. I'd never hurt an animal but he babies it like crazy which is fine but I can't even fucking pet him without my bf getting all defensive. I know what it's like to baby a pet I do it with my own dog he's like my baby he's family it's just the way my bf looks at me and the tone of his voice. I feel like crying when it happens even now my eyes are watering...

>>18213853
Like I honestly think this might cause us to break up. I like his dog a lot I care for it. But I can't stand this treatment and we've talked about it and he just laughs it off but it hurts and he knows that. What is he's doing this to cause a breakup? We've been together a year and a few months and I'm moving a couple hours away to go to school and he isn't taking it well... what if he's being petty with this shit to force me to end it?

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All women should be locked up in chains and turned into slaves. They are not people, they should not have human rights, they should be treated like the commodity that they are.

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Me to roommate: "Hey can you like not rub your boyfriend in my face, it makes me feel like shit and kind of like life isn't worth living"
Roommate: *Sends a billion snaps of them cuddling and kissing*

Today I found out that my ex-husband actually called my therapist on the phone and asked her to give her information. I'd signed a very specific HIPPA release that indicated that he could NOT get any information from her. She, of course refused him. Then he sent her some total bullshit release he probably just made up or got off the internet... I mean, REALLY? Who's not over this? It's been almost a year since we agreed to divorce. My therapist was absolutely tripping, since I've told him he was a narcissist. She said she felt frankly "disgusted" by his call. Now I have to spend more money on lawyers to deal with this, which is of course his plan. He supposedly has some new bitch and I could care less. But he's still trying to interfere with my life. Fuck.

I think I'm gonna study medicine. Cardiovascular medicine, to be precise. Might even be a surgeon. Who knows.

I'm upset you don't talk to me, but I won't resent you for it. I'd gladly hear your voice one more time. Bye.

>>18213857
Break up.

>>18212261
just kill it already anon, jesus.

how the fuck do you ask someone out? i did directly ask the generic "do you want to go out" but got an indirect answer based on the fact that she was going to school somewhere. i couldnt care less abiut that but i just want a yes or no. i know theres something there because we flirted prior to asking her now we interract a lot and she has a nick name for me. and i could sware there was just some sparkle in her eyes as she said she couldn't. problem now is shes never dated and its hard to understand her, from my perspective. im infatuated with her but she doesnt know how i actually feel about her. but im not landing any moves that have worked with other girls and i cant tell her how i feel becase i dont know how to go about it. this lack of closure is fucking pissing me off.

I guess it's shitty that I left without a word but I wish that this dude would stop trying to contact me. It's been months and I have not communicated in any form with him. It's just getting creepy at this point. There is a reason why I'm not the only to have stopped talking to him and I wish he could realize this. The only reason why I haven't told him to knock it off is because he is actually mentally unstable and with anger issues and I'm afraid that any form of communication would actually make things worse.

>>18211765
You need be a man to get her

>>18210221
No don't be an asshole, you're going use her.
You only want Betty, Stacy or Whatever attractive woman you want.
Or unless she's OK with it.

>>18212670
the bloodlust never goes away. sorry anon, i know that one too well.

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I'd like to tell a story. It may take a while but I don't care. Just let me tell my tale, and maybe it'll help you out.

>be me
>be summer of 8th grade, about to go into HS
>be depressed
>living with verbal and mentally abusive stepfather
>called my mother a whore, blamed her for her health problems, treated me like an idiot
>living with this day to day just tore at me
>wouldn't do anything at school, when I'd get home I'd just sit on the computer
>during the summer I just wouldn't do anything other than go for bike rides and play video games
>download Warframe
>play for a while with my uncle and cousin
>but usually I'd play by myself
>go into the recruitment chat, looking for a clan to join
>get accepted into one, introduce myself, the usual
>after a few days of talking to them, I start to run missions with them
>play until sunrise daily with them
>meet one guy named Kevin
>he and I didn't even have to run missions to have fun
>we could just message eachother for hours
>talk about all kinds of stuff. Music, women, philosophy, religion, etc.
>helps me get over my sadness
>stopped me from killing myself
>this went on for a few months
>eventually we added eachother on social media and would talk on there
>now we could talk wherever and whenever
>he becomes a mentor to me
>teaches me stuff and gives me advice
>while talking to him, I reconnect with an old friend, Alex, from elementary school
>we talk about vidya and shit all the time
>summer comes along and alex doesn't say a word to me
>Kevin and my cousin are the only people I talk to
>see cousin every time I go to my grandpas house
>cousin and I would bullshit while working on whatever project my grandpa had for us
>grandpa was very mechanical, loved to build machines and stuff
>we would build model rockets and shoot them off at the local park
>shit like that
>Summer ends, confront Alex for not talking to me
>he apologizes and we become friends again
>but there's a problem, Kevin has stopped messaging.

>>18214285
Cont. part 1
>week goes by, don't think about it too much
>then a month
>then two
>begin to count the days
>day 100, nothing
>day 200, still nothing
>be night of day 300
>decide to reach out
>he apologizes to me
>lost his job, computer, and wifi
>I feel bad for being pissed at him
>tells me "it may be a while before we party again bro"
>feelsbadman
>be summer of 11th grade, going into 12th
>start to hang out with Alex more
>spend nearly every weekend at his house
>Order pizza, watch movies, play vidya
>always walk the traintracks any time we needed to travel somewhere
>we'd go on walks late at night, just to talk about whatever bullshit
>happiest days of my life
>yet I still felt a bit sad about Kevin
>fast forward to September
>start of senior year
>introduce Alex to a group of friends I had met during the summer and my cousin from before (James)
>talk for hours on end with all of them
>4th week of school
>decide to keep to myself for a few days, dealing with stress
>Alex gets pissed because of this
>group of friends take Alex's side and kick me out of the group
>James sticks by me, my only IRL friend
>try to make more friends
>reunite with an old group I had met a while back
>introduce James to them
>all is well for a month or two
>find out that James had been talking bad about me with Alex, and the two groups
>feelshellabadman
>feelsbetrayedman
>my two best friends from all my life were gone
>try again to make new friends, meet a cute girl named Abbie
>Abbie and I would talk all night, she had been dealing with the same stuff I was
>was there for her through think and thin
>would check on her every morning and every night
>fall in love with her
>care for her more than I care for myself
>I do what Kevin taught me, I be there for her as much as possible.
>one night, she's extra sad
>try to help her, doesn't go so well
>ends with her calling me an asshole and saying I'm a horrible friend
>after all I had done, that's what she does to me

Saying you want to break up with me because you're dealing with other shit in your life is bullshit. There is some other reason that you're not telling me, supposedly to not make me feel bad. It doesn't matter at this point, though. I fucking gave my heart to you, if you being stressed out over stuff is the sole reason, you shouldn't have whined about it and let me help you - I promised to you since the day we went serious that I'd be there for you no matter what. Instead you just throw me aside while I'm worried trying to figure out what is bothering you and why you weren't talking to me anymore. And it doesn't end there. Even after you broke up with me, you still went back and forth on whether you loved me or not for almost a month, and honestly was I glad when you finally made up your mind because whether you meant to or not, you played with me. I want to move on but I can't because you set the standard for me, and if you're going to do this to me then why should I let anyone else? Regardless I'm sure I'm going to find another person who may or may not have a handle of their life, and then chances are this shitfest will happen all over again. I don't know, I want someone in my life who will love me unconditionally, I'm a mess right now thanks to you so that's probably not happening for a while until I get my shit straightened out.

>>18214327
OMG I'm going through the same situation word for word.

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>>18214311
Cont. 2
>lost around 10 of my closest friends in the span of a couple months
>don't feel anything after this
>nothing but emptiness after losing all of them
>then, my grandfather disowns me
>completely ignores me at family events
>the man that taught me math and how to ride a bike won't even look at me
>I tried my best to be there for all of them, and I failed
>at a complete loss
>am by myself for a while
>decide to talk to one of the guys from that second group, Nasser
>Nasser always was a nice guy to me
>calls me brother and friend constantly (he's from the Middle East)
>just talk to him for a while, we both share our hardships
>also start talking to this cute Eastern European girl from my English 12 class
>European girl, Iana, becomes my only IRL friend
>fall for her almost instantly
>joke around with eachother and bust eachothers balls
>find out she's leaving in May
>feelsbadman
>feel shitty that day, decide to hop onto my PS4
>see a buddy online, Callum
>I had met him when Alex and I were playing vidya after school
>Callum and I talk daily now
>we're both a lot alike it's crazy
>Help eachother out while giving eachother shit, stuff like that
>now Nasser, Callum, and Iana are the only friends I have
>Nasser shoots me a message late at night
>Pic related
>this shit makes me cry for the first time in months
>it is now April and Iana with leave in a month
>then it will be just Nasser and Callum
>and I pray to god they don't go
>it has been months since i felt anything
>and these three make me feel good again
>Iana will go, but I will have to learn to accept that

>I learned from all these experiences
>people won't stay guys, but you have to just keep moving on
>everything connects in the end
>don't ever think of suicide, it will all turn out eventually
>I love you all and hope you have a wonderful rest of your lives
>thank you all for what you've taught me

Goodnight /adv/

Thanks for listening

>>18214179
YOU GUESS? DO YOU NOT REALIZE HALF THE FUCKING SHIT YOU DID? ARE YOU THAT STUPID? FUCKING HYPOCRITE AND LIAR FUCK YOU

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Beastie isn't eating. It's almost become a routine that I'm making posts on /an/ when I'm not staying up for 2-3 days at a time trying to come to terms with her illness. I have so much love to give, so much generosity to share with my animals that people in my past have taken advantage of. This isn't fair. I keep trying to find ways to blame myself. I did not give her cancer, she had to of been exposed to it from Petco. God damn it. If Heather cleared a necropsy, we would have known that the other RTB that was her tank mate was spirited away from the same illness much sooner and hers laid dormant for many years.

Please don't take Mister Mew and Mister Peebles away from me now. Please don't take Luna away. Please let me love the only things I have left.

/vent

>>18214390
Facts, my nigga. Doing that is a shit thing to do, wish you told him to stop contacting you. And if he persists, block him

>>18214378
I know how it feels to be shut out by best friends. I'm learning how to let go, and your story makes me sad but I hope everything goes alright and that those guys stay by your side til the end. Have a good night, anon

>>18214390
>>18214419
It wasn't a romantic relationship and I was just tired of being used as a therapist for someone with possible undiagnosed schizophrenia who refuses to see a doctor. I blocked him everywhere but he still tries to bother me.

>>18214378
Mate, the only think I don't like about your story is your co-dependance. But FUCK ME you took it like a champ. Always going forward, never getting worse. That Callum is right and you're a bro, and stronger than you think. You maybe just find the ones that will stick, since people which care, is hard to leave you, even if the move to other contintent. The thing is that you stepped from asshole into asshole.

Also
>then, my grandfather disowns me
Elaborate?

>>18214436
Oh and to add onto that, he's made threats toward people before.

>>18214436
Ok now I kinda understand why. Next time at least state the problem and see if you can talk it out, but it sounds like that guy needs mental help. Just keep ignoring his replies.

>>18214448
Scratch out my part about talking to him about it, just "I can't do this anymore, you need real medical help, goodbye". And if he threatens you, contact the police

i feel so alone

i dont know how to feel about you

>>18214446
My grandfather feels strongly about one side of the political spectrum and I feel the opposite. He has always been more liberal while I was more conservative. This led to arguments between him and I and all sorts of other nonsense.

I left a bunch of other stuff that happened out because that would've taken much longer to type, and I didn't quite feel like writing a novel just yet.

>>18214470
Sounds fair. But it should be a lot of shit if your granddad just disowns you. Once again, you will go though it, you went about being lonely again and again, which for me sounds worse than being lonely all the time without being with closest ones once.

>>18214458
Why?

>>18209951
Everyone goes away in the end, but I still love you Lianda. Every day for nearly 3 years. Even if once every 6 months I come here to say it, I still love you. Miss you I hope you are doing well.

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I don't even care about masturbating on the bus, or who knows about it, anymore. I just wanna become a runner and grow broccoli. This seems like the wrong emotional response to what I've done, but it's getting harder to justify feeling bad when my negative thoughts keep melting away each month. I wonder if I'm becoming too cheery for my situation, and I can't quite articulate the cause. I'm getting a little weirded out by my own positivity

>>18213477
then prove it

ive posted in this thread 4 times already. i keep getting things off my chest thinking it's gonna help, but it's not. i dont know what to do.

>>18214538
ive been isolated for the past 2-3 years and i met someone i really enjoyed talking to who cut contact with me. being alone was much easier when you didnt have anyone to miss, Anon.

>>18214458
What is going on?

>>18214625
>>18214613

>>18209951
You've dramatically injured my pride and that lingering lack of confidence affects everything I do. People keep telling me that I have to move on and just stop thinking about it, but they don't understand what you did. In a post-Niche world without god, justice will never be served unless I make it so. You must die so that the world can be set straight.

>>18214639
Loneliness is a blessing and a curse. You may meet people that you think will solve all of your loneliness issues but once lonely, always lonely. Find a person to be lonely with. There are a lot of lonely people out there

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>>18214678
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZxJepkZa_Ag

I was going through alcohol withdrawls (still kind of bad, mainly terrible dreams and random points of heart issues)
Im day 52 now. I have no intentions of drinking, i achieved it through a year of binge drinking when i rarely drank previously. And I've had depression to the point I'm having mental breakdowns for no fucking reason!
Was perfectly fine somewhat before i quit, now i can't even smoke cannabis without heart issues, dryed lips/skin/dehydration, and uncomfortable body tremors that are all slowly getting better. I used cannabis for insomnia and I've barely been able to break 6 hours a night at best since childhood.
I cleaned up on my own 2 feet, went cold turky, then had withdrawls i didn't think i was going to have. Parents don't drink as my dad (use too) had liver failure and my mom just didn't like it as my grandpa was a terrible alcohol addict. Both smoke cannabis and are hard working indeviduals.
Would have gone to a doctor but i don't own a car, i live miles away from the closest bus stop, And since i turned 18, my parents and siblings are completely unsupportive with shit like this.
Im 21 years old, still a virgin as i am 5in hard. From being born 2 months early. I don't look terrible, always getting looked at by average 7/10's. Fells like im dehydrated in a ocean.
All my friends are starting to question my sexuality for this reason, i don't want to lose my virginity to a prostitute out of pride but that same pride keeps me from the possible pain of bullshit I'd hear if people knew. Im at the point where people can call me a faggot and i really wouldn't care though (i would be gay if i was) My life fucking sucks. I can't even get past sobriety as my problem with getting relationships is fucking terrible to have. Not a cuck and i sure as fuck am not a beta. Not a badass by anymeans but im in decent shape, can fight and play contact sports pretty damn well, and im 5'11. Should i see someone over this shit?

>>18211187

This is what happened to that.

>>18214639
I was lonely then I found a boyfriend just as lonely. We were together for 3 years until he broke up with me. I'm lonely yet again.

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>>18214697
im sorry to hear that anon

hang in there ok?

>>18214686
LOL I am 19. No drinking for mee

>>18214612
You have to reach out as well.
When we don't communicate. It's kinda hard to prove it when we can't talk or see each other.

You have to risk a little as well to give me the chance for me to prove it. For now I can only give you space. Maybe someday we can actually talk. If we aren't too distant at heart by then.

Handle your shit.

Fuck, I'm not your secretary. I'm not your nanny. If your friends are trying to reach you and you're taking a nap, they need to call the fuck ahead.

Kathryn, I'm probably never going to stop thinking about you, I love everything about you even if you'll never feel the same way for me

the only person i felt like i could talk to in my life developed serious schizophrenia this year. we dated for two years and now it's like someone i've never met before. hell, he thought i was in the FBI trying
to attack him. i miss when he was 16 and i was 15. i feel so bad for
him but at the same time it hurts me because he hardly remembers who i am. jack, i wish we could go back in time. i miss you so fucking much and now i'm an alcoholic to compensate for feelings. i miss you.

I hate when people who are complete dicks try to say they're not really dicks because deep down inside they're really nice.

There is no deep down, motherfucker. If you're being a dick more times than trying to show a nice and cheerful attitude, that "deep down" is nothing more than situational behavior.

M

You're a spineless twat.

>>18209951
I'm getting better at accepting this whole "I will be alone forever" thing. I've even decided to postpone my suicide plans and stop making choices as if I'm going to die.

But it makes me feel worse and worse at the same time. If I decide not to kill myself, what am I going to do?

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>>18209951
>freshly cut nails
>get spicy sauce all over my hands
>run out of tendies
>walk into convenience store
>buy tendies, ritos and nut water
>korean dude drops my change on the counter and expects me to pick it up
>try to slide it off the counter but it ain't workin
>korean dude just looks at me struggling to pick up my change for the next 2 minutes
>beg for help
>he starts laughing at me
>guy waiting behind me is getting tired of my shit
>panic and pick up the dime but it tears under my nail
>get blood all over the counter
>scream in pain
>drop my tendies
>korean has smug look on his face every time i walk into his store now

>>18214932
Trim your nails, don't cut the whole thing.

>>18214672
Move the fuck on, it's that kind of mindset that made the world as it is. You are part of the problem.

The more I treated you like shit the closer you were. The more you willing to be around. The thing is that wasn't me. I was broken and couldn't properly translate my love for you into loving actions. Like bumbling idiot, I only harmed, I was rash, rude and sometimes abusive. I knew this wasn't right, so I went to get help. I went because I truly loved you. I truly wanted you to be happy. When I finally stop acting, treating you way and tried to work with you to make things better for the both of us. You walked away.

I guess I was better off breaking you down than being supportive. Who would have known.

I looked and tried to find things, but there was nothing. Thank you. I believe I can move on now.

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Trying to un-NEET myself has been so taxing.

I already did step one by having a job, but nothing else has changed. I'm still a little fucked in the head and still physically sick. It's almost been half a year and I feel like shit for wanting to leave so soon. Sure, there are some days I do feel proud of myself for making the first step, and then not much sooner after that, I get so pissed off at myself because people can clearly see that I'm someone who's much better off leeching off NEETbux than working a service sector job. And I have to hear their comments every day, pretending I don't hear anything.

Iv got work tomorrow. I don't think I'm going. Or the next day either. I feel sick from this. I don't think I can do anything but lay in bed until we talk or you come back. I would never ever do that to you please believe me.

>>18209951
I'm either a woman or an absolute faggot and I post in this thread because I'm either too poor for therapy or too weak to actually confront my life problems.

>>18213229
Im not currently with her. She needs time, isnt ready yet, needs me to be patient, etc... I told her how I feel about her but she wont tell me how she feels about me. Making me wait like this makes me feel like she is just not that into me. If thats the case she should tell me. Im getting old too and i shouldnt be wasting time on her if she doesnt want the same thing as I do. Despite all those flaws im crazy about her. The only flaw i cant overlook is if she isnt as attracted to me as i am to her.

>>18209951

I thought Bitcoin was too expensive at $300 and I lived with my parents while working. I moved out a while ago and I just checked its current value out of curiosity ($1200).

Fuck me.

>>18210279

If you want your thread to get attention, make the ask more generic and inviting for people to tell their own stories (ie: "how do you deal with a pet dying?" rather than "my snek has cancer and you faggots need to suffer for it")

>>18215129
>>>18210279
shut up that's a sick snake you are talking about show some respect

Let me represent myself!

It's Creeper from the g'd up trece gang homie! Sun Valley gang homie. Westside Armenian Power

>>18215133

Your snake doesn't love you.

>>18215143
doesn't change the fact that he's a hero. he doesn't have to love anyone you gotta earn that love

I think I'm going to be a sk, it's not my intention but it gets harder to resist.

>>18215140
stay killing those enimigos vato

I broke up with my ex a couple months back. We were together for 2 1/2 years. Not so long in the long run, but still a portion of my life. I thought what we had was something. I thought I could make love to her and it be special. I thought she made love OUT OF love. Sure, that's kinda dumb, but that's some people.
I was her first. The first to please her and to fuck her. So I thought it meant something to her as well. I did get a new girlfriend like two weeks after me and my last girl broke off because of her immaturity, so I can see her reason for being hurt as much as she was. That's a dick move on my part, but it just happened. My ex, she couldn't even argue right. But I loved her. I love my new girl too. A solid 10/10 in my eyes. Rare.
But I find out today that my ex, the one I held so dearly, is already fucking with another guy. That killed me. I was trying to keep the emotion in all damn day. I did. I exploded a couple hours ago. Now I feel like nothing we did is special. Like she's a slut. My image of her is crushed. I am crushed by the betrayal of my memories. I thought she was sweet and innocent, but she's a little whore in the making. She said she'd never touch or be touched by a guy she didn't love. Well, she's already fucking with a guy she barely knows. And I'm getting over it though it's killing me. Anyone else? My new gf knows too.

I'm here bitching because I want to but I really don't have a reason to. I hate my fucking school because its hard for me and not easy for me to be "successful" in it. I don't know how to study, I don't know how to plan properly, and I'm almost done with school and still don't know the single most important software for my field.

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>>18211819
>>18211820
Spoke with my therapist over skype about this just now.
Made me feel a bit better. He agreed with me that my aunt was full of shit with her accusations about me making my cousins anxious and uncomfortable, given the way they acted on Saturday. The younger one of the girls especially sought my company and was visibly upset when I brushed her off and didn't act as affectionately towards her as I did before.

Discussing this with him helped, though I am still kinda down. I wish that I could see my cousins again sometime, but I doubt that I can, outside of the context of big family gatherings. I do not feel comfortable visiting my aunt until she apologizes and admits to being wrong, and even then, I dunno if I could visit. Things cannot exactly go back to normal once the pedophile accusation has been thrown into the air.

Maybe someday, when my cousins are old enough to understand this schism, I can explain to them why I disappeared from their life. My ties with my aunt might be severed for the rest of our lives, but at least I might be able to give some closure on this mess to my cousins in time.

>>18215152
It's cool you want to be the sky, but no shit really happens up there. Sure, you might find some nifty aircrafts and birds up there, but that's all you'll ever encounter.

I always dreamed of being the ground itself (Or, more specifically, Earth on its surface). People will find gold from my shit, they always manage to manscape my body for me, as I'm just a bunch of dirt with lots of foliage.

I also want to be the sea, but I feel that would be too ambitious. Conquering and ruling over the ground is good enough...for a while, at least.

I take shitty jobs to get by and spend too much time on 4chan and gaming.

I feel like making friends would make me a better person, but I'm not worthy of friendship without improving myself first.

How do you escape this trap?

>>18215187
Fuck societal standards. Just get out there and make friends. You'll realize nobody is "normal." Look at us all here on a thread early as fuck in the morning. more people than you see in a day. If you wannabe better, go out there and do. Friends will follow, if you don't make them first.

>>18215198
This. Everyone's a bit crazy on the inside. No one is perfect.

>>18215198
>early as fuck in the morning
In my world, it's literally midnight.
The only reason I'm even up at all right now is because my schedule is so fucked up, my sleeping chemistry just killed itself.

I have to go to work very early morning, THEN I have to deal with my late shifts again.

>>18213888
No one wants to touch a frog poster.

>>18213477
A? Please be you. Don't let this be a lie. Don't be another random anon who relates

Oh nobly born, let not thy mind be distracted.

>>18215157
You're coming off a hypocritical dick. You don't own her what she does with her body and who she sleeps with is her choice. You act like you wouldn't do that and you just admitted to moving on so quickly. So what, is she not allowed to be happy and move on like you did. You're not at fault for moving on so quickly but don't get all high and mighty like you're any better than her. You sound like an ass women are human not some idol to look up to and hold to a higher degree. She's not a slut for moving on with someone you don't even know the whole situation they could be dating casually. She gave you her virginity but you're not special because of that. Jfc

I have a small peepee that just barely pokes out of a toilet paper roll.
What do?
Hard mode:
no killing self.

>>18215157
You, sir, are a douchebag. You say you're angry at her for sleeping with someone else when you did the exact same thing. It's not the fact she's moved on that you are upset, it's because your ego is wounded by the realization you are not/no longer "special" to her. Do you expect her to become a nun because the shining light in her life, i.e. you, has left and no one else could ever compare, so she'll be miserable and lonely, resigned to give up on love? Get over yourself and realize you are not a special little snowflake. Her life will continue without you.

Furthermore, stop taking your issues out on the new gf. I'd dump you over this because it shows a huge lack of maturity and screams you could have major control issues. What's done is done, the past is the past, you can't control others' actions, so just focus on yourself, how you react, and how you treat others moving forward. Your anger is misplaced and should be focused on yourself because you did the exact same thing only two weeks after you broke up. How do you think she felt?

P.S. She's not a whore, you are.

I'm sick I can't sleep. She's not here and I don't know what to do. I want to throw up I want to run I want to smoke. I'm full or nervous anxious energy a headache and my stomach is doing flips.

>>18212813
lmfao

dude, you are so full of shit and you've posted here enough times over your obsession so stop trying to backpedal.

newsflash- kids also want ice cream for breakfast every morning! that's like saying a rape victim was asking for it.

*baka* f'ing idiot- just please go back to whatever rock were living under

>>18215447
The fuck are you talking about?

I made friends with a severely depressed man. He's almost 10 years older than me, I like talking to him but sometimes his depression is a burden. We met just when bad things started happening to him, and I don't know how to be supportive. I am scared he's going to end his life, and even if we only met earlier this year it would be so sad. He has potential but he doesn't see it. Every compliment to his work sounds like a lie to him, or something I say just because I am inexperienced. I'm tearing up just writing this. He's so tired of living, I can feel it when we talk.

Seems like everyone's afraid of me lately. Feelsbadman.

you need to directly reach out me. I have a lot of shit that I'm busy with. I'd love to make this work __ . I'll give you every opportunity to prove it but YOU arr the one who needs to make it uo to me. Or at least a huge fucking effort. I know it wasn't perfect, I know I played my role and the things I did were wrong. But what you did was too. Don't be a coward. You reaching out would be a great start.

>>18215244
Fuck. I'm sorry. I'm not A.
Sometimes this give people hope, and it's nice at times to get it out, but damn.

Who ever A is, I hope he reaches out to you anon. Good luck.

>>18215982
I wish she would fucking tell me this.
Fuck.

I miss you, I P.

>>18215982
Me too, but I'm busy with my own shit like you. The whole thing between us is too distracting, I need full focus to get things in place first.

https://youtu.be/7h9M61iW-zU

You're the movements in my sleep
You are the words I couldn't keep
Oo, I saw the fumes and watched them seep
Into the wounds you bear to bleed
I could lose everything

(1/3)
>be me
>10
>school holidays
>have to go to this thing called "holiday program" ran by the school because mum is too busy with work
>place is a shithole
>food sucks
>have vidya but only game is sing star
>majority of toys have been broken by some shithead kid
>head care taker is an absolute cunt
>lets call her jean
>Arrive at holidaycare
>little to no friends
>hang around awkwardly with these kids who I kinda know
>we just mainly play with the broken toys and just wait for our parents to come and pick us up
>never enjoyed a single day of it
>notice this girl around 13 whos singing and dancing with her friends
>lets call her tahlia
>"Hey anon, come hang with us. we're making a dance show"
>think why the hell not so I join them for a while.
>end up having a great time
>I don't spill my spaghetti
>feel comfortable with my new friends
>we talk about what type of music we like
>joke around and laugh till we're in stitches
>its time for lunch so we all go out into the playground
>hang with new friends
>we talk for a while and rehearse this dance/singing performance we were doing
>"hey anon can I talk to you in private" says tahlia
>"uh yeah sure

>>18216175
(2/3)
>we go behind one of the buildings at school
>she looks at me and doesn't say anything
>she flashes her tits at me and grabs my ten year old dick for a while
>stand there in shock
>feeling uncomfortable af
>not sure if I like this or not
>confused as fuck
>she runs away back to her friends
>I go back to standing around awkwardly with my "friends" till my mum picks me up
>think about wtf happened
>mum walks in
>thankfuck.jpeg
>"how was school care anon?"
>"uh.. yeah good"
>remain quiet for rest of the car trip
>stay up the majority of the night thinking about the events over and over again
>next day
>decide fuck it, it was probably a one off. shes a nice grill, right?
>wrong
>same shit happens
>tell her "stop it. I dont like it" because thats what school tells us to do
>doesn't phase her one bit
>run away
>hang by myself the entire day until mum picks me up
>mum notices something is wrong with me on the car ride home
>she keeps asking "anon, are you okay? anon, whats wrong?"
>"nothing"
>get no sleep

>>18216180
(3/3)
>next day
>try to avoid all eye contact with tahlia
>come lunch time
>I decide to be by myself that day
>I chill at the back of these water tanks
>guess who shows up
>I shit you not, this bitch starts fucking dry humping me
>starts grinding
>push that bitch on the ground
>run away like a pussy
>get interrogated by mum again in the car
>I cant hold it any longer
>I tell her everything shamefully
>I hold it together relatively well
>I'm very brief with my words as I'm embarrassed as fuck
>"well anon if your that disturbed, we can get legal help if you like?"
>Im that embaressed I turn down her offer
>instant regret
(still regret it)
>"anon, you should talk to your dad about this. Im sure he can help you as well"
>"no mum, im seriously fine"
>but I wasn't. I was that ashamed that even to this day, my dad still doesn't know shit
>next day we go talk to the head care taker, Jean, to see what can be done
>"oh you'll be fine anon, she's only going to be her for 3 more days"
>she clearly didn't give a fuck
>nothing was ever done
>be me
>present day
>skitish as fuck around grills
>keep my distance
>scarred to walk by them as I'm scared they'll touch my penor or some shit (even though I'm a beta fag)
>blame my self for putting myself in that situation
>blame myself for being quiet
>blame myself for fucking my self up for life

I get it. You're making this harder on me on purpose. You're purposefully trying to make me feel more isolated than ever. You're turning my own family against me. You've made it so that no matter how much proof I have or how much sense I make, people will always disagree with me. You've made is that every little oddity in my life is now normal. Like the intersex scars on my bits, and my kaleidoscope eyes. Apparently now these things are totally just normal.

I see the swallows, but I'm not a sailor.

The storms are getting worse.

>>18216093
Glad you understand, assuming you are who I think you are. Best of luck with whatever you're busy with atm. In a bit.

I've been trying to get back with my ex. She means a lot to me but she's been really depressed lately and no matter what I do she just kinda pushes me away. I asked her out a while back but she told me she was feeling like she'd be better off single. So I didnt pry.

A few weeks later she's with some guy who she barely knows and barely gets to talk to.

I just don't understand what I'm supposed to be doing.

>>18216318
She didn't believe it would work. Sorry.

>>18216250
I hope you can be patient. I am too crazy for you.

Who is the girl that whored herself out for $400? and then again for half the price?

Who is the person she did it for?

It could be fucking anyone I know. Why the fuck won't you people tell me these things? Do you think I'm just going to forget? Or stop caring? Congrats, you made me feel more alone than I have ever felt in my life so why continue this?

Why do you continue to deny I was born intersex? The scarring is super fucking obvious. I've looked at... hundreds of fucking dicks and none of them have the discolorations and marks that I have. The only dicks THAT DO are from transgendered women... other people also born intersex.

I can't go to a doctor because you've told them all to lie to me or deny me service. I've asked 3 doctors to fucking give me STD tests and they all said there was no need to. What the fuck is that kind of bullshit?

The STD you hinted at me having is a female only parasite. It's treatable so why the fuck won't you let me treat it?

Why won't you let me get my hormone levels checked? Why won't you let me get an ultrasound so I can see my fucked up ovaries and uterus.

Why is it so important to keep me in the dark about all of this? Why won't you let me confirm these things? Intersex, STD, parkinsons.

When the fuck is this stupid game going to be over?

What's the fucking point? Why are you doing this to me? Why the fuck can't you just let me live my life and be happy? I have never hurt anyone, I never want to hurt anyone, and I want to live a peaceful as I can life.

You are all fucking evil. There is no good reason for any of this shit. It's malice and greed.

>>18216468
Have all the time in the world for you. And no you aren't, though you are crazy (in a good way). Take care.

please, send me a message, tell me where you are, how you are doing, i miss you, i love you. please contact me, because you know i can't contact you

dark souls combat is soooooo fucking shit. I'ts unresponsive as fuck and if you dodge at all you have no stamina to fucking swing a sword.

You basically get lucky that the AI glitches out and instead of attacking they walk back and forth too much,

>>18216644
christ and the leveling system IS FUCKING RETARDED AS FUCK.

WOO 20,000 SOULDS AND I BOOST MY ENDURANCE BY 1 FUCKING POINT.

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>>18209951
This is going to be a bit more of a vent.

So, without trying to sound self pitiful or anything, I see myself as nothing but a burden, just how I was raised, it's what I know.
That along with depression, severe anxiety, health problems, but being charismatic, caring, and humorous means that people who know about the former 3 things have related me to Robin Williams, and also see me ending up like him.

I've avoided relationships in general because of just how I see myself.
I've had one relationship, and that was really nice, but whenever I was around her, I'd feel physically sick just from the amount of guilt. It's not like I came to someone out of my league and just went for it and regretted it, she came to me and poured herself out to me. But I couldn't help but feel that they were just confused and were setting herself too low and underselling themselves. They could've done so much better than me.
Anyways, we had to end it since she and her family had to move across the states and there was literally no way of us being around each other for a while, we both came to the conclusion that instead of just being moping over not being able to come back to each other, we decided to just move on.
I stopped feeling the guilt since they were now free to get someone better, but an empty feeling in my chest came back as well as the feeling of being alone, though having a sizable friend circle.

At least not showing any interest in anyone makes people really trust me to talk to as well as never having any of those "i have a boyfriend" moments since girls trust that I won't hit on them or anything, so there's no problems there.

I like that people come to me to just talk to, just sitting, listening, and discussing with people who need it. It makes me feel useful.
I just wish I could handle a relationship so I could have someone to do the same.
I don't feel right talking about this stuff to friends.

>>18209951
In my opinion, arabophobia and anti-semitism are one and the same prejudice. That is the reason why I am not making new medicines in the lab, but instead practicing naturopathy in the kitchen.

Jesus, every woman I love or have fallen in love in me ends up getting mental disorders. Either because I am a bigger piece of shit than I thought I am or I am just straight up been cursed.
When will this suffering end?

>>18216644
Git gud