cultural difference??

>>18198162
Get the fuck out.
Pushes turn into punches really quick.
Unless you were assaulting him too and he was defending himself, he really has no right to be shoving you.

>>18198162
You need to wait until things have calmed down, distance yourself and avoid any arguments- even if you live in the same house find a way to "busy yourself" or sleep until his mood has changed.
When he's calm, tell him that you're serious, you will not for being treated that way and absolutely will not be pushed around. If he gets aggressive, find somewhere to go or if it does escalate go outside and call the cops.
You have to stand up for yourself and draw a clear line in the sand, people will treat you however they please unless you make it clear you will not put up with it. If you keep crying wolf about the cops he won't take you seriously, but please use the police as a last ditch effort.

>>18198162
>Then, he is angry towards me again, and said I want to ruin his life and I don't love him.
He's trying to manipulate you. Of course he's in the wrong, so he's attempting to make you feel guilty over his bad behavior. The only time anyone should lay their hands on their partner is out of self-defense.

>Because the push is harmless
He's normalizing the abuse. Right now, the push is harmless, but this also isn't the first time he's done this. Next time, what if you happen to be at the top of some stairs? That could kill you. It's likely that he's going to get so angry that he'll actually hit you.

> I am very disappointed, confuse and angry now, is this really my fault ?
It's normal for those abused to feel this way. This is the type of behavior that keeps those abused tied to their abusers. How in the world could him physically harming you be your fault?

>Am I over reacting ? Do people really think this behaviour is accepted?
No and no. I don't care if the person being abused is male or female, this is deplorable behavior. This man does not love you.

>>18198166

This. Leave while you can. You dont want to be ten years in and try to leave.

>>18198162

His behaviour is unacceptable, yes, but calling the cops over a push is an overkill. Just tell him you'll dump him if he ever lays hands on you in anger and THEN DO IT if it happens. Laying down ultimatums is pointless if you're unwilling to carry them out.

>>18198170
I've personally raised my hand at one girl before because I was very hurt. I've never considered myself a violent person but the emotions made me think irrationally so I got close to inflicting physical pain because I didn't know how to communicate. I haven't been violent since.

I'm not saying that this guy isn't going to be an abuser in the future but I think it's worth trying to have an honest conversation with clear communications of emotions before ditiching.

>>18198162
What the fuck do you mean by "cultural difference"?
Let me guess he's a minority and you think they're all violent, and he "doesn't know any better". I hope he beats the retarded out of you, you racist cunt.

>>18198177

The difference between you and the OP's boyfriend is that you didn't actually lay your hands on this person. You got close, but you reeled it in. He has repeatedly done this to OP.

>>18198182
I reread and rethought the situation and you're probably right, I retract my statements.
In this case it's much safer to stay away from this guy.

Get out of this relationship and cut contact RIGHT NOW unless you want to end up on the evening news. I say that as a man with anger issues. I'll seeth, punch things and damage my own body but physical contact with a woman is a line that shouldn't be crossed.

>>18198180

>she dates a shitskin
>still gets called racist

You apes never cease to amuse me.

Everyone telling you to leave is in the right. And you know it's true.

I don't know about calling the cops now, but pushing does quickly escalate to hitting. At that point it's appropriate to call the police, but do you really want to get to that point?

I've been there, believe me. Dated a Vietnamese guy for three years and when things got bad they got REALLY bad. Any harm done to you by this man is going to emotionally affect you for years. It's important to realize when you're in or on the way to a truly damaging situation, and it sounds like you are. Please leave him.

>>18198162
He pushed you.
You told him not to dare doing it ever again.
He blamed you. He doesn't even see the problem, OP.
Get out of that. Stay safe.

>>18198162

>is this really my fault

no, but you are using female privilage as leverage.

what it just boiled down to was 'if you do any physical aggression towards me you're going to jail'.

men dont have this or really any trump card.

but imagine if they did. imagine if one time you slapped him, not even hard, just chastisingly on the shoulder and he said 'DO THAT AGAIN AND YOU'LL DO TEN YEARS IN PRISON'.


i should note that he shouldnt be pushing you at fucking all anyways, obviously thats a problem, but if neither of you are going to treat this like adults, then you shouldn't really be dating.

a supposedly healthy relationship would involve discussing your issues. but both of you are operating under threats to control one another.

him with the threat of violenece, and you with the threat of jail. think about this logically, would you actually stay in a relationship where if when things go bad one you threatened to hurt the other physically and the other one threatened to put oyu in prison?

imagine how that would work if you just stated exactly what the implications are. not okay.