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Im pretty sure my coworker is super into me, and shes pretty much the most perfect for me person Ive ever met... But I just cant get over the fact that I 100 percent dont find her attractive, and I feel terrible about that. She hasnt outright said anything, but we started hanging out regularly a couple months ago, and all the signs are there, the flirting, the touching my arm, laughing at what might be the worst jokes ever uttered, etc. We both have mostly the same interests, were both cool with each others little weird things, were at the same point in our lives, everything is great, I just... Cant picture being with her physically. Just straight up never occurs to me. Within moments of meeting anyone, thats pretty much where my mind goes, but when I think about it with her, it just doesnt excite me at all, and I feel bad about that. She is an absolutely adorable person, not hard on the eyes at all, shes just not my type physically. Part of its the weight, I've got 6-8 inches on her and she out weighs me, and Im a bit overweight myself, but even then, I dont know if Id be interested. I feel like shes going to make a move, and Im either going to settle or make her feel bad, and Im going to feel bad about that either way. I dont want to ruin our friendship or our working relationship.
Whats your /adv/ice anons?
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>>18188137
You don't like her. Don't date her. It's not that hard.
Sadly for most people physical attraction is a necessary part of a romantic relationship. It doesn't work for you. It happens.
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so, why exactly did you start to hang out with her? that's pretty much leading her on, iow, you already fucked up.
there's no easy way to let someone down since it's basically saying "i can do better than you". rip it off like a bandaid and let her deal with it.
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>>18188148
I cant hang out with a girl without it going somewhere? Shes an awesome person who I enjoy being friends with, Im just not down to fuck, which is pretty important for a relationship.
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>>18188137
For now, cross your fingers that she doesn't make a move. If she's that great of a friend, it'd be good to keep it that way. If she does, though, you'll have to let her down easily. Don't straight up tell her that you find her unattractive, that'll hurt her too much. Just give her lines like "I'm not looking to date right now." If she's as great as you say, she'll understand. She'll be hurt regardless, but if you let her down easy, with a little time, you could still remain friends.
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>>18188190
pls don't tell me you actually fell for the "female/male friendship" meme.
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>>18188137
You're leading her on for the ego boost, stop doing it and be normal person friendly with her from now on.
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>>18188137
its a proven fact, that if you put a girl in the friendzone, it will make her want you even more.
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>>18188190
You are giving her false hope. The more you give her the harder it will crush her when you reject her eventual sexual advances.
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>>18188200
And dont listen to this guy. Dont give her vague bullshit like "im not looking to date right now." That will still allow her to have false hope for a relationship in the future. Its the worst thing you can do. You have to be honest.
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Just live your life day by day. If she makes a move on you be an adult and tell her that you don't feel that way about her and leave her alone for a while. I believe it's unfair to try to carry on a relationship with her knowing she has feelings but right now you're just suspicious, she hasn't actually revealed her hand yet so don't worry about it.
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