Thread replies: 8
Thread images: 1
Thread images: 1
Anomynous
How to break up but still remain friends 2017-04-01 11:21:10 Post No. 18178977
[Report] Image search: [Google]
How to break up but still remain friends 2017-04-01 11:21:10 Post No. 18178977
[Report] Image search: [Google]
File: no_way_fag.png (940KB, 1240x918px) Image search:
[Google]
940KB, 1240x918px
Hi people, I have a problem.
I've been with this girl for more than two years now, and I love her. Everything is great. We get along very well, understand each other and spend lots of time together. Communication is good and it's an uplifting relationship for us both all in all.
But there is one problem: Sex is not working. Due to psychological issues on her part, penetration doesn't work at all and any other sexual acts occur maybe once every two weeks. It's driving me nuts, I have told her repeatedly that it is very far from what I wish our love life would be like and it is frustrating as hell. At this point of time, I can safely say that I have tried absolutely everything within the realm of human imagination to get her to like it more and do it more often.
But all my attempts so far have failed. Every time I bring up the subject, she says we will work for it together and it will get better, but it isn't, and 9 out of 10 times I'm the one taking initiative.
I have thought about ending the relationship several times now and I'm certain that it will have to happen at some point. Except for the issue mentioned above, there is an age gap that might turn out to be a problem in the future (I'm 23, she's 28). She is sure she wants to return to her homeland and family in some time, whereas I want to return to mine pretty soon. That would turn our situation into an LDR which wouldn't help with any of the issues we're having right now.
The thing is, I really like her as a person and could very well imagine to live on friendly terms with her with no romantic feelings involved. Guess that's what years of sexual frustration can do to you. Do you guys have any advice on how to bring up the issue to her? Or how to manage reducing our relationship to friendship in the easiest way? Thanks in advance.
>>
>>18178977
You don't. Intimacy is a one way street - you go just in one direction. You can be friendly with them, but you can become acquaintances, not friends.
Just break up with her and move on with your life. You'll lose someone you cared about, it sucks, but it's for the best.
Anyway, no sensitive future partner would ever be fine with your friendship so it's due to end anyway.
>>
>>18178997
Thanks. Well I know she's still at least acquainted with an ex of hers, so I guess the possibility is still there. Still, do you have any idea how to bring the subject up to her face?
>>
Hey OP. I'm in the same boat. I've been with my GF for one year, and the only problem is sex. She has pain during intercourse and hasn't been able to fix this problem even with medical help.
She's my best friend and I care for her, but I can't live without satisfying sex and without the passion it brings into a relationship. I'm working up the nerve to break up on good terms, but the only way I see it is that it's like a band aid. Just gotta rip it off.
>>
Just say it. You have requirements that need fulfilling and need someone else to fill them.
>>
>>18179333
>>18179341
Hey man, mind telling me a little bit more about your situation? Maybe we can offer each other a bit of advice.
I have had trouble voicing my own needs towards other people for all my life, and even when I do, I feel I am often not taken seriously. Still, it is unfair not to voice one's needs and opinions and expect people to conform to them.
I have, however, told my gf that this whole thing is a problem and it is very much a possibility that I won't want to continue this way in the future. That was a couple weeks ago and nothing has changed in her behavior. It pains me that the good thing we have going needs to break apart on this, but apparently we just don't fit each other regarding this subject.
>>
>>18178977
Pro tip: You can't
>>
Good post
Thread posts: 8
Thread images: 1
Thread images: 1