Boyfriend no longer enthusiastic during sex

>>18175916
I guess he is loosing interest, i was like that too, and my and my gf broke up cuz there were no new things in our relationshit just boring routines, even sex felt like a routine, i wish she came up with something new not just in bed but in our relationship in general coz i lost interest first and it was pretty hard for me to come up with something so i think you get what my advice is you guys go do something you never did before !!

>>18175916
You might try regaining his interest somehow. Have you let him do anal, or tie you up, etc..? Are you and he pretty vanilla, or already kinky?

>>18176031
>>18176046

The sex is pretty varied. We did try anal, bits of bondage, but honestly, what got us going the most was missionary. I know it sounds weird, but we tried pretty much everything within reason and we always came back to that. Anal is just... I don't understand the appeal and neither does he. We tried it, didn't care much for it and moved on. The one thing that gets us off more than missionary is public sex or sex with the risk of getting caught by someone.

>>18175916

Perhaps he is getting comfortable in the relationship - how long have you guys been together?

My boyfriend lost interest in sex for a while so I can really relate to your post. For him, the reason was pretty straight forward though, so at least we could work through it. Even though I knew the reasons, it didn't stop me feeling like it had something to do with me and worrying about this.

Have you spoken to your boyfriend about how you feel? I mean really sat down and tried to speak openly about it? There's obviously a problem because of the change in his attitude, so perhaps you could tell him just how much you've noticed.

How long have you been together? Cuz sometime sex doesn't matter as much as it did before. The whole weneedtotryallthethings-mode vanish and the everyday mode drops in. Do you have sex every day? Is he stressed and have tons to do?

>>18176053

This is our third year together, anniversary in October.

What was your boyfriend's reason for losing interest in sex?

And yeah, I talked to him, or at least tried to, but he just keeps saying he's fine. Really, outside of the bedroom, you can't really tell anything changed.

>>18176059

When we got together, we pretty much had sex every time we saw each other, and that'd be at least 5 times a week. Once we moved in together, 7-8 months ago, sex was an everyday thing. But it wasn't a chore or a routine. We genuinely wanted it. We'd do it everywhere around our place, just close the drapes and do it right on the kitchen table or in the living room.

He's still attracted to me, I can tell as much. We still have our own little signs of physical affection.

And no, not stressed at all and they're not working him to the bone at work either.

>>18176068

Kinda normal that sex drains out and become less important after a year or two. He can also be in a mode were he feels that sex is not needed for him and he focus more on himself instead via training. Also have alot of stuff in his head because he try to change and make a better living perhaps. That takes some energy.

Try too hold off and tease each-other for a few days. Like you can't have sex and cum for 4 days. But you can tease the shit out of each-other until then. Sex is important but doesn't need to practice in a daily level.

>>18176068
>I talked to him, or at least tried to, but he just keeps saying he's fine.
You might need to be more assertive, e.g. "I know you say it's fine, but it's not..." and then go into the detail of what is different from your perspective. He may not even realise there's been a shift. He migth just be tired from the gym etc and not know it's affecting the bedroom situation.

>>18175916
It may be just because he is getting used to it. It happens to everyone, really. Some sooner than others.

There might me some external factors that put stress on him, or cause him to worry, thus making him more tired and/or lowering his sex drive.

OP, the issue isn't with your boyfriend. It's simply the way this relationship is going. I'm sure you will still have amazing sex from time to time, just not always.
It happens. As long as he loves you and he shows that affection, as long as he cares about you getting off, then it should be fine. Don't put too much pressure on him or you'll hurt or scare him.

>>18175916
Maybe he's sore or tired from training? After a workout I can't be bothered fuck and when I'm sore it isn't that much fun anymore

>>18176180

>Do you trust your boyfriend when he says there is nothing wrong, or do you feel there's something else going on?

I do trust him. That's why I can't find it in me to pressure him about it all the time. When he says, he really means it. I mean, I know his tells when he's genuine.

>Has he changed anything else? His internet habits, phone use?

Nope. Still the same. He rarely even uses his phone, save for phone calls and messages or listening to music. I don't really understand what his internet habits might have to do with anything, but none of that's changed either. At most, he spends 2 hours a day on the computer.

>>18175916
So you are three years together, you trust him and you fall into routine.

Have you tried to put ring on him, have some babies and start family? Cause it is sort of point doing all these things with him. Otherwise you can just break now. It wont get much better anyway, you will just get more old, more boring and probably more not happy.

>>18175916
Be honest with me right now. Are you still as a attractive as in the beginning of the relationship? When a guy goes to the gym and starts to take care of himself its to become a better version of himself. Now I'm not saying it's the case but maybe he lost physical attraction to you and is trying to get a better looking girl.

Could be sore/over training.

If it's DOMS and he isn't rolling that shit, that'd totally stop me from being able to get in the mood. If he's over-training, it could be affecting his libido quite a bit. It's not uncommon for men to develop erectile dysfunctions due to being overworked.

It could be bro-science, and his mate telling him that ejaculating reduces your testosterone, or some no-fap nonsense.

Who knows, man.

Wrap your legs around that motherfucker and don't give him a choice then. Nobody said you had to be a dead fish.

He invests a lot of day energy on the gym. It's a bit natural.

I'm not saying he's too tired to do it anymore. but the body just asks for it less, after all, you already released your stress and need of excersise after the work out.

I think its a little bit normal for him to not be as interested as before, even if it's subconsiously.

Try to be more extreme or flirty from time to time, but don't expect him to be the exact same as before.

>>18175916
Sounds like a low tide in the normal ebb and flow of life.