How can you be a man today, in a non-/pol/ way?

>>18169278

So, you alienated yourself on an internet borad, and now you are trying to fint into the real world by using ANOTHER internet board?

Can you see the flaw in the logic here?

>>18169278
Theartofmanliness does a lot of articles like this. How manhood is under attack by society and what to do to be a man in the modern world.


Some of it is cheesy and some of it is literally fedora-tier (as in, article about fedoras), but there are also a lot of good articles, too

>>18169313
You're on the same internet board so I don't know why you're acting like you're superior.

>>18169278

You do this by not giving a shit. This really is not particularly hard.

You go out each day, you treat your fellow man like you would like to be treated. Do your job, don't whine and complain, be a pleasant person. When it comes to women, just don't be a doormat. Stand up for yourself when needed, be assertive but not an asshole, act in your self-interest as long as you're not heavily infringing against someone else's.

Stop turning to the internet for your ideologies.

>>18169278
Jesus christ dude...

Your political alignment has literally nothing to do with your life or your achievements.

It has a lot more to do with your friend circles and communities. Thats it. And even then strip political allignment away and people are just people with slightly varying world views.

Thats why they used to say "never talk about politics money or religion". Because once you do you become an expert of shit you know nothing aboutl and start spewing horseshit, and people who think differently can easily see that horseshit.

Drop your political box personalities crap. It doesnt actually correlate to anything in your immediate real world.

Go to places or events that appeal to people who think like you, meet people, and build a social life around your passions. Women will be there regardless.


Goddamn all of you guys, your facebook feeds are flooded with the worst examples of human beings who happen to identify as [opposite of your political spectrum]. Its called advertisement and click bait.

We get it. Half the country wanted to vote for a lying narcissist with no critical thinking skills, and the other half wanted a criminal corrupted cunty lawyer.

Other than that you all have everything else in common.

...got out of hand sorry.

Tl;dr

You dont have to become anything. You just need a social life with like minded people.

>>18169334
Interesting post. How are you doing in life if you don't mind me asking? Job, girlfriend?

Man I really am completely disconnected when I think about it. I *used* to have a pretty good salaried job, nearly 2 years ago now. I ragequit because... I guess I became very arrogant and thought that I could become a "real man" by doing some manlier job, something like that.

But I haven't done such a thing... even though I have some ideas, I haven't done it. Either because I'm a fucking pussy (which I probably am), or.... well I guess that's probably the main reason, because I'm too much of a fucking pussy.

>>18169339
Probably yeah, although my friend group (who I have increasingly withdrawn myself from, since I'm now a nearly-2-year NEET) is kinda different to me in many ways. So maybe I need to make new friends.

Not that I don't like them. I'm just a bit different to them (that is, I'm probably nerdier than them)

>>18169339
>>18169278


>real world experience

Sorry ill fill that request.

My gf and i hate sjws, we hate racists, we hate feminists, we hate misogynists...

Essentially we hate assholes and people who come up with baseless bullshit with no evidence, and people who believe things based on emotion alone.

We found each other.

I also fucked 15 other women before meeting her. Never once talked about politics or turned into a feminist or turned into a nazi nor did i turn into anything in between.

Just did the things i do and liked the things i liked. Sometimes mutual physical attraction got me laid, sometimes it was alcohol, once it was a shared love of guitar, once it was because we were neighbours so why the fuck not. One time it was friends for a year which ended up building a lot of sexual tension and it exploded like a crumbling dam one day.

I also got laid before i had any social skills at all. I was legendary jn highschool for being an awkward as fuck weird ass dude.

But i kept exposing myself to people.

Some like you anyway. Thats all there is to it. Meet people. End of strategy.

>>18169334
>You do this by not giving a shit. This really is not particularly hard.

/thread

>>18169325

I'm not asking them to make me likeable outside of the internet, mate.

You admit you let a board rewrite your personality so much you lost touch with your generation. Do you really think you should be here asking for another board to do the same?

manliness is about being self sufficient. you can express this many different ways but thats basically what youre going for. it has a lot of cross over with /pol/ because being self sufficient/independent/responsible for yourself/etc. are right wing abstractions

integrating into society (by how i think you mean it at least) is probably the worst thing you can do for, because youre then completely letting yourself diffuse into the whole. youre saying that you think to fit in you have to fall in with the prevailing winds and be like them, just for the sake of being like them. does that sound like a masculine thing to you?

>>18169354
Thanks man. I mean this post could be totally made up but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and say it isn't.

>But i kept exposing myself to people.
Oi oi.

>>18169368
>integrating into society (by how i think you mean it at least) is probably the worst thing you can do for, because youre then completely letting yourself diffuse into the whole. youre saying that you think to fit in you have to fall in with the prevailing winds and be like them, just for the sake of being like them. does that sound like a masculine thing to you?
I have thought along those same lines (like I said, I have been absorbed into the /pol/ mindset), but the ultimate conclusion of it is committing crime and going to prison. It's the only way you can truly say "fuck you" to all the rules that are expected of you.

Have you done that anon?

>>18169325
>points out the error in your thinking
>thinking they're patronizing you

wew lad

>>18169459
Nah he's trying to act like a smug cunt.

>>18169481

THat's why you ignored my second post?

Here, let me point it out: >>18169364

I'll make a shorter, easier to read version: Wanna know what people around you are like? Don't ask us, go ask them, dude.

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>>18169339
>Thats why they used to say "never talk about politics money or religion". Because once you do you become an expert of shit you know nothing about and start spewing horseshit, and people who think differently can easily see that horseshit.
>Half the country wanted to vote for a lying narcissist with no critical thinking skills, and the other half wanted a criminal corrupted cunty lawyer. Other than that you all have everything else in common.
>failing this hard at taking your own advice

>>18169418
youre dont have to spite society (unless you want to), youre just not supposed to do what everyone else does because thats what everyone else does

think about it like this, everyone drinks water because its a good thing to do. we dont drink water because rihanna drinks water

in a healthy society, everyone is doing good things because they are good

We live in a world in which many young people are anxious and have some level of awkwardness surrounding other people. Introverted, autistic and generally very shy people can now withdraw within their own internet world and face their issues as little as possible.

If you are a man who takes care of himself (be reasonably in shape, clean, dress okay), is reasonably emotionally stable, has healthy self esteem and knows who he is and what he wants out of life, you are already doing very well. Especially if you're in an urban area with more women than men. It matters little whether you preach feminism or not. Women are, just like men, looking for reliable people to love them and add to their life. Not for someone who neatly fits a certain mindset. Just a good package deal.

As for how to approach women. Social skills is more important than anything else. It's baffling to me how often people talk about "game" and getting women like it exists within a vacuum. "Making" a woman fall for you is much closer to making a friend than to acing a presentation, it's not a trick or gimmick. Perhaps to smoothly turn on someone to a ONS, but nothing sustainable. So learn how to make small talk, learn how to present yourself to an array of different people, learn how to be an attentive listener and how to allow people to get a positive and realistic impression of who you are and what you're looking for. People like people who show interest in them, who enjoy their own life, who can talk with enthusiasm about things.

As for women, they want to be treated like a loved person. Not so much "respect" that you put them on a pedestal and reenact some idealization of a romance relationship. But real respect, respecting that you are dealing with another flesh and blood person with needs and flaws and quirks. Make her feel you're attracted to her, let her feel it if you love her, but don't be afraid to call her out on something, don't do stuff at the expense of your self respect.

>>18169278

>Do I have to be a feminist?
>Do I have to into "social justice"?

You just have to not be a cunt. 4chan does not have any insight on how to achieve that. Please refer to real life people with actual functional social lives to answer these questions. This is literally the worst place you could of come to ask this.

Get the fuck off of 4chan and don't come back you stupid fucking /pol/ack. This place isn't real life and you know it.

Also, 3/10, because you made me respond.

>>18169505
>Wanna know what people around you are like? Don't ask us, go ask them, dude.
That wasn't my question though... my question is how does one operate in the modern world.

I know what my friends are like, for instance. But I guess /pol/ has convinced me that these guys are bluepilled (even though they're actually far more successful than I am in life)

They're pretty typical millennial guys I guess. And I've let myself sink into the /pol/ mindset, which is pretty stupid I guess...

>>18169539
>my question is how does one operate in the modern world.

So, your friends are successful, but you want us, complete strangers, to tell you what to do. After /pol/ already steered you wrong.

I think Anon here >>18169536 might be unto something. So much stupid has to be bait, and I'm too dumb to see it.

>>18169525
You are being influenced by people yourself. You don't live in a vacuum my friend. If you think that you aren't influenced by your peers, then you are clearly just too arrogant to admit it. Because we are ALL influenced by people.

>>18169530
This is a good post I guess - this is everything that I used to believe, and that I used to be quite good at, and that I used to be aiming towards. Until I let myself get pulled into the /pol/ mindset.

>>18169536
I spend literally every single day on here right now, and I have no social interaction whatsoever. Since I'm NEET. So yeah.

>>18169539
Stay the fuck away from those crowds. Anyone obnoxious enough to unironically have a metaphor for how right they are and what blind sheeple the rest of the world are does not deserve serious attention.

>>18169351

Sorry, I had to step away for a call.

I work in corporate marketing and make very solid money. I don't have a girlfriend because I don't want one. Dumped my last one.

Stop getting obsessed with "manliness" dude. No one is keeping fucking score. Just do you.

>>18169550
>So, your friends are successful, but you want us, complete strangers, to tell you what to do.
No I'm not asking for you to tell me what to do you dumb fuck.

I'm asking how you approach life. Do you have a good job? Do you have a partner? Do you have a social life? Are you content with these things?

I'm asking for general tips on how a person can be successful in modern society. Everyone does it a different way don't they? I guess if people say what they do, then that might give me ideas. Not the same as "telling me what to do" for fuck's sake.

I just want ideas.

>>18169574
>I guess if people say what they do, then that might give me ideas. Not the same as "telling me what to do" for fuck's sake.

Did that happen in /pol/, too? I mean, before you realized you alienated yourself.

>asking 4chan how to be normal

>>18169607
Many people here claim to be normal, this guy apparently is an example: >>18169585

>>18169618
They're trolls. You falling for the troll is more an example of your own ignorance and naivete.

Nobody on this website has anything close to your best intentions in mind. In fact, we would all rather see you stumble and fall because it's funnier for us when you come back butthurt.

>>18169627
Take your edgy ass to /b/. There are tons of people here and they're not all outliers and perverts living depraved lives.

>>18169618

Dude, can you read? Read for a second:

You are telling us a board on 4chan messed with your head. I'm telling you you clearly can't handle the internet as much as you want. So, spend less time on 4Chan, because you'll only alienate yourself more.

This isn ot about me, or whether or not I'm normal. This is about you and how gullible (or not) you really are. This boards are pretty toxic, so if you can't filter things out at least a bit, better to stay away, mate.

>>18169278

Simple, what I do;

>"None of my business."
When shit that could alienate me is bought up.

Be tight-lipped, mind your own business, keep your feels and opinions to yourself.
Don't get too personal and keep your distance, don't discus money, politics or sex (the exception being around, and only around, like-minded individuals).

You want to blow off steam and actually voice your opinion, use the internet while you still can because it won't be long till they try to thought-police this shit too.

That's for keeping a job anyway.
You know damn well as much as I do "freedom" isn't real anymore. "hateful" opinions are banned, and can cost you your job, wife, friends and family because "tolerance" only extends to your skin colour or genitals rather than the shit that actually makes you, you.

As for a wife or girlfriend, family, kids...
My best suggestion would be to explore other cultures for that shit, because if even if you actually get that kinda thing in the west, you know too much and no matter how loyal she is you'll always be wondering about the gun to your head that is the divorce courts. If she doesn't kill the family unit, then what you know and your arguably justifiable caution might.

>>18169627

Not everyone here are trolls trolling trolls.

I stick around /adv/ and give good advice because I started posting on 4chan in '05 and it's weird to not anymore. Kills time.

But I have a decent life built up around me.

>>18169278
Do you realize how fucked it is you are ignoring a way of thinking solely because others dont think that way?

Is that how a man acts?

>>18169635
>>18169631
Trolls. Remember not to fall for it. If you do, well. You'll learn eventually, for your sake I hope.

>>18169627
>Nobody on this website has anything close to your best intentions in mind. In fact, we would all rather see you stumble and fall because it's funnier for us when you come back butthurt.
I've been here 10 years, I get that

I'm just asking people to share their experiences mate, nothing more, nothing less.

I'll judge for myself whether I believe them.

>>18169632
>You are telling us a board on 4chan messed with your head.
No I'm saying that I let myself get sucked in. I'm not blaming the board.

>So, spend less time on 4Chan
Sure

>This isn ot about me, or whether or not I'm normal. This is about you and how gullible (or not) you really are.
It's not purely /pol/ that changed me - it's a number of things in my real life that drove me into this state to be honest. Comments from a family friend, and then stuff with some of my mates... and with some people I sort of knew. When I think about it objectively, there are a few things that made me start thinking in a /pol/-like mindset. But I'm now thinking that this mindset doesn't help me.

One of my friends used to say "stop comparing yourself to others", and I thought "lol what a pussy, you should always compare yourself to others that you want to be like, otherwise how do you know what to aim for?" - but I think he probably is right. Fixating too much on an external standard is probably a bit stupid. Focusing on oneself is probably a better strategy.

Be an individual. Being a man, if it means anything, ought to mean having your own purpose and going after it.

So no, you don't have to be a feminist or an SJW or a liberal to live the kind of life you want to live. But don't be a /pol/tard either. Escape the ideological trap. Form your own opinions about shit. Don't blindly follow ideologies to try to fit in with people. That's not what a man does.

What you do need to do is improve yourself, for yourself. If you do that, women will be more attracted to you. But don't fall into the whole redpill/manosphere/PUA/MGTOW garbage either. It's more of the same shit. Don't put up this fake "masculine" identity because you want to be accepted. Real masculinity isn't a set of steps or principles, it's just having a purpose and pursuing it, and not letting other people and their bullshit knock you off it. You sound like you have this idea of what you should be and you try to form your identity around it. But that's really just what the culture you're in has shoved on you. Be your own person. Hope that helps.

>>18169669
>Fixating too much on an external standard is probably a bit stupid. Focusing on oneself is probably a better strategy.

But then:

>Do I have to be a feminist?
>Do I have to into "social justice"?
>I'm now realising I have to integrate with society. But does this mean I have to become a liberal, for one thing?

That's still an external standard...

>>18169633
Good post except for:
>As for a wife or girlfriend, family, kids...
>My best suggestion would be to explore other cultures for that shit, because if even if you actually get that kinda thing in the west, you know too much and no matter how loyal she is you'll always be wondering about the gun to your head that is the divorce courts. If she doesn't kill the family unit, then what you know and your arguably justifiable caution might.
I mean true divorce courts can be a bitch but I think I wouldn't marry someone who I think is a cunt. Basically.

>>18169639
Which way of thinking is that?

>>18169670
I think your post is a healthy way of approaching life but let me comment on this:
>What you do need to do is improve yourself, for yourself. If you do that, women will be more attracted to you. But don't fall into the whole redpill/manosphere/PUA/MGTOW garbage either. It's more of the same shit. Don't put up this fake "masculine" identity because you want to be accepted. Real masculinity isn't a set of steps or principles, it's just having a purpose and pursuing it, and not letting other people and their bullshit knock you off it.
I mean, I would say that "real masculinity" is just succeeding. No matter how you do it.

If someone manages to succeed in life (and have kids) by being a PUA then great, good for them, but personally I don't think it will serve me very well. Because I know that most chicks hate PUA bullshit. PUA is just a front, a facade, a complete fucking effort that I can't be arsed to manufacture.

So yeah I would say "real masculinity" is just succeeding (reproductively, that is), no matter how one does it.

>>18169679
Well society is an external standard isn't it? I can't help that, that's how it is. We all have to live in a world in which mass consensus exist.

But I said that I shouldn't be "fixating too much" on external standards. I didn't say that I should disregard them completely.

>>18169698
>I think I wouldn't marry someone who I think is a cunt. Basically.

Every man ever, even the ones who got divorced thoguht that exact same thing mate, and as I said
>If she doesn't kill the family unit, then what you know and your arguably justifiable caution might.

You might not be way now, but maybe one day she introduces you to her best and most influential friend and it's some blue-haired man hater.

Again, even if she isn't like that, things can change and even if they don't caution can turn into suspicion and suspicion alone ruins plenty of otherwise good relationships.

The fact of the matter is that divorce is a $50billion industry, with plenty of people getting a cut, from the government taxing alimony and child support, to the people being paid it, to the lawyers. Then you have the media glamorising and normalising it, businesses now doing "divorce cakes" to celebrate it...

Regardless of the individuals, there are plenty of influential people and organisations who profit from breaking families up, and it's ingrained into our culture.

That said, you're entitled to your own opinion, and you're your own man. If it's a risk you're willing to take then fair enough.
I won't bother you further, I was simply recommending the option with less risk.

>>18169539
>millennials
if you're not over twenty there's a high chance that whatever "radicalization" you have is just a result of youth and will slowly fad away as you acquire your own values instead of borrowing those presented in the most charismatic way to young minds. That's something that you seem to be doing already.
If you're over twenty how did you even find a friend group that immature, the basic bitch personnality should be "90s kids" here

>>18169698
does reproducing really mean that much to you? or is it one of the things you just picked up and never questionned

>>18169714
Have you been divorced? If not then why are you so obsessed with the notion of divorce?

>>18169783
>If you're over twenty how did you even find a friend group that immature, the basic bitch personnality should be "90s kids" here
I'm 25. What do you mean immature? Literally the only thing I've said about them is that they're "pretty typical millennials", by which I guess I mean "socially functional people who are pretty normal for their/my age"

So how is that "immature"? I don't understand.

>>18169791
The ultimate life goal of every organism on the planet is to reproduce. Basic biology mate.

>>18169812
I guess we just don't have the same definition of millenials then, because the word means "people born in the new millenia" to me
so disregarding that youth thing, do you consider your former views flawed in any way or do you just want to fit in?

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>>18169947
>I guess we just don't have the same definition of millenials then, because the word means "people born in the new millenia" to me
It means "those people reaching young adulthood around the year 2000", picture related

>so disregarding that youth thing, do you consider your former views flawed in any way or do you just want to fit in?
They helped me live a normal life, whereas now I don't. So on that basis, those beliefs were probably better.

Who gives a fuck about fitting in or not fitting in; I care about success in my life. And like I've already said, EVERYBODY is fitting in. Even if you are the CEO of a company, or even the head of a prison gang (both alpha male positions, and 4chan has a fixation with being alpha - a fixation that I admit I have adopted myself, which is why I think my current beliefs don't serve me well), you still have to respond to the demands of the people that you lead. Otherwise they, or one person in particular, will overthrow you.

>>18169278

remember that all the ragers on /pol/ are sad permaKHV losers, dont take their advice on women. there are a few of them that learned PUA tricks and go on strings of unfulfilling sexual escapades.

the key to getting what you want out of life is first figuring what you want, what you REALLY want out of life. then being honest with the world about it and being disciplined in your approach to achieving your goals

>>18170018
>remember that all the ragers on /pol/ are sad permaKHV losers, dont take their advice on women. there are a few of them that learned PUA tricks and go on strings of unfulfilling sexual escapades.
True.

>the key to getting what you want out of life is first figuring what you want, what you REALLY want out of life. then being honest with the world about it and being disciplined in your approach to achieving your goals
Well I'd argue we all want the same thing - success. Being able to provide for yourself. Having authority and respect (which you get from being good at something, i.e. your job, and hobbies too I guess if you're into them). And a family.

Although I guess some people decide they want different things for whatever reasons.

Shameless bump

Here's a little bit on how to be a man:

You do you; care not for the small minded who judge and are judged. Learn to use your hands to craft, fix, entertain, so on and so forth.

Master your life and your hobbies.

Live for yourself.

>>18171034
There's no reason to bump this thread. This guy said everything that needed to be said.
>>18169334

And no, I'm not him. It's just that this is really not that difficult to figure out. You got all you needed in the first 5 answers. Writing or thinking further about it honestly serves no purpose beyond clouding the issue unnecessarily.

>>18170042
A lot of people don't give a shit about "success" and care more about leading a happy life really
If you want to view everything as a ruthless competition you can but it's not the way the majority views the world and conceptualizes their own goal, and it can be detrimental to you to be in a cocnstant Fight-and-no-flight stance when people around you are just relaxed really
Maybe you're fit for it anon but it's fucking exhausting and it seems kind of pointless
Listing family as the last thing and not even mentioning friendships seems kinda worrying, you look like you're going down the path of emotional distanciation, only existing through your work, which never works in the long run

>>18169278
>a real man
>liberal
>feminist
>/pol/ack

You're too obsessed with labels. Luckily, you're smart enough to know that /pol/ is retarded, but for the wrong reasons (you dont fit in anywhere else, instead of understanding that it's retarded on its own merits).

You need to sit down with yourself and really analyze what you truly believe, not what is popular or will let you fit in. Do your research and come to a logical conclusion.

That being said, shitting on Trump is a surprisingly good ice-breaker with women. If you want pussy, being alt-right/a Trump supporter definitely won't help.

>>18169278

yes. the only way to marry a woman is to be into social justice. because only social justice warriors get married. fact.

>>18169278
Just take up carpentry OP. It's pretty redpilled.

>>18169278
Once you get your life on track, you'll change your beliefs either way.

For a start, just learn basic social etiquette. There is almost no scenario in work life where your beliefs are asked, so unless you act like a sperg and start yelling about immigrants at a meeting about falling profits, the shit doesn't matter.

When it comes to dating, it's better to be relatively open from the start, otherwise both of you are wasting your time.

>>18171904
>If you want pussy, being alt-right/a Trump supporter definitely won't help.
Obviously not but if he's looking for a wife, it's pointless to pretend that he hates Trump while getting a boner every time the füherer says something anti PC.

>>18169278
> job, wife, children - checked

seems you're confused bro. here are my 2 Cents:

(i) keeping a healthy distance from mainstream society is nothing bad.
(ii) You don't need to change your political alignment or way of life to get a gf / wife. WTF?!

>please give some real world experience

Dude, on what? Meeting your future wife / gf? Approach people in a relaxed way. Like they're a good buddy in spe (!), you just haven't met yet. It's just that simple. I met my wife while asking the next best person around for pen, when I needed to write something down (No fake set up here, I really needed a pen. It just so happened the next person around was a beautiful smiling girl, I fell in love with afterwards...). And before that I met all my later gfs in totally random situations. Just start a friendly conversation. I guess most guys do mess up because they just want to hook up to badly. But this is a tricky mindset. If you approach someone, try to find out if she /he is a cool person first. Be relaxed, be real. if you're on the same wave, things will develop on their own.