How do I drop out of college, marry my 29 year old boyfriend

>>18167584
>I can provide more details/answer questions if needed.

You dont need to.


You sound clearly out of your depth.

You're 19, you're not even an adult. You genuinely do not know what you want.

And it is gross you're dating a 29 year old, unless he is mentally handicapped in terms of maturity or isnt seriously considering a long term relationship with you.


The obvious answer is to have a serious discussion with your boyfriend about wanting to move in and potentially have his child. Any other route like trying to sneakily and intentionally get pregnant without his knowledge or discussing it with him would make you an outright shitty person in any scenario.

>>18167589
hes the one that wants me to get pregnant right now, i told him my parents would disown me and that he would need to marry me first. he is very finacially stable, college degree, salary+commission job. same values, religion, and ive never loved someone as much as this. hes ready to get married as soon as i want.

>>18167589
Get fucked, son.

I'm 29, and when I was 18, my gf and I moved in yogether and took care of ourselves. Parents hated us but it's what we wanted - independence and to live our own lives.

You're gonna make mistakes no matter where the fuck you are, or how old the fuck you are. Might as well live by your own standards. We got married for a few years and decided we weren't destined to be, so got divorced and are still friends. I'm her childs godfather now. I have literally zero regrets.

Knowing how I was at 18, if I met an attractive enough (personality, body, etc) 29 year old female, I definitely would have been willing and capable of making it work, assuming we were both patient. Believe it or not, some humans still acknowledge their instinct to flee the nest and start their own lives instead of being crippled by overconvenience from parents.

Op, you can take college classes whenever you want. You just won't get the "dorm life, banged out slut who lies about how many guys she slept with" experience. Employers do not give a shit as long as you have the degree - if you even decide you want to work at a later date. You are only trying to live an existance that comes natural to human females, and I applaud you for having the bravery to do what feels natural nowadays, instead of just what society is yelling at you to do.

>>18167597
>ive never loved someone as much as this
Empty words coming from a 19 year old, but whatever.

How long have you been together? Did you want to be a housewife before you met him? I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with your dream but is it what you really want or are you dumb because of love chemicals?

I'd let my parents disown me if I were in your position. But then again I barely have any contact with mine and I live in a culture where family isn't important.

>>18167597

Well shit, i still think it is odd that a 29 year old is immature enough to get along with a 19 year old.


But beyond that YOU DO YOU. If you have both talked about it, you both want it, and your parents are the only thing stopping you then its up to you. I tend to agree with them, more than 50% of marriages end in divorce in relationships of couples under 30, so it will likely end poorly. And the maturity gap between a 19 year old and a 29 year old is BIGGER than a 60 year old dating a 30 year old, so keep that in mind. But you have the legal right to do whatever the fuck you want. So, make mistakes, learn from them and hopefully it ends up being the dream you imagined it to always be.

>>18167606
Except for the "get fucked" and encouragement to enter into a definitely sketchy relationship in terms of relative maturity i totally agree.

At the end of the day it is your life and your choice.

>>18167611
>60 year old dating a 30 year old
Shit, that's gross, regardless of gender.

>>18167610
we havent been together that long, but hes been waiting for me to become available for him, and ive known him for over a year. it has always been my dream to be a housewife since i was little, all ive ever wanted to be was a mom that didnt work and cooked and cleaned all day (feminists have actually sent me death threats bc of this)

i guess this is the first time a partner has ever been able to support me in the way we both wants. he doesnt want me to work, he wants a a strong woman wife home training skills and good house work ethic, and the ability to rasie children.

>>18167614
But less gross than a 29 year old dating a 19 year old. At least both 30 and 60 year olds are established adults, past the party phase and know exactly what they want.

A 19 year old living at home doesnt even know how to shop for groceries properly let alone pay bills, be an adult and know what they want.

>>18167616
my mom died of cancer when i was 15. i was raised in an italian house hold (that means i have been trained very well) and ive been a nanny for several years to normal and special needs children of diverse ages. besides actually carrying/raising my own child, ive basically had every major and defining experience a female centered in the home should have to be established.

>>18167620
>nanny (read babysitter)

Oh sweetheart, you have no idea. I thought 2 years babysitting these two kids (one 2 months one 3 years), plus being an employee of the church nursery was enough to prepare me somewhat for motherhood. It is not.

And I'm so happy my husband and I had literally a decade together (dated when I was a teen, then we married and were married 7 years before a child) to learn how to adult before I tried to raise another human to adulthood.

This is from someone who was raised in the Deep South, and a majority of my friends have kids with a good decade on my own, considering I have a baby at 28.

I feel like a lot of my friends missed out who became mothers at 18. A good 1/3 are no longer with the father of their children.

>>18167632

thread..

Do you know why you start producing eggs/semen at around 13 years old, and why you want to fuck everything, and why the jews consider you an adult at that age?

Because that's the age humans naturally reproduce. This whole waiting til late 20's and into 30's shit is why there is so much autism. Our bodies haven't evolved to catch up with societal norms. He human body produces the healthiest offspring before 27/28. After that, the statistics for autism skyrocket. It isn't convenient but our bodies are naturally supposed to have kids in our teens or early 20's. Again, not convenient, but that is the healthiest safest route.

Listen OP, it doesn't matter what you've always wanted and stuff, because the fact is, you're 19. Your boyfriend is ten years older than you, and when the age gap is that big when you're that young, there's something odd going on. People are simply at different maturity levels.

Don't cut off all your options at 19 to someone who may or may not have the most honourable intentions. At least wait a little while and keep dating.

How long have you been dating anyway?

>>18167776
But being a teenager may mean you produce healthy offspring (not at 13, the risk of injury from childbirth is very high) but that doesn't mean you're mature enough to look after them at that age. Nor are you capable of getting and keeping a good job.

Most teen mothers don't finish school or university, and a large percentage of teen fathers leave, and children raised without a father are more damaged than those who have slightly older parents.

he is going to leave you when your face isnt so pretty anymore, your body a bit used up by babies

and youll be there with kid(s), no income, no skills or a family

this is too much of a risk to take to satisfy the ego of a rich manchild

>>18167584
Honestly, the dynamics of your relationship don't seem healthy. There are so many things wrong about your relationship.

1. The age gap is really big considering you're just 19.
2. If he cared about you, he'd push you to become a proper adult before you make any life-changing choice. You're giving up on life before having ever experienced anything. I get that you want to be a housewife and you want to have his kids, but you're basically still a kid yourself.
3. It is very risky to let yourself depend financially on a man at your age, especially a man you have just met. I know you are super in love, but probably it's just the honeymoon phase and in 2 years you will regret everything and end up with a failed marriage, a child to support and no degree/no career.
4. You have literally every single circumstance that makes divorce rate skyrocket - your young age, the age gap, different education level, different salary, you have dated for very little. I honestly would be extremely surprised to see you together in 10 years.

Wait before you fuck over your life, his life and the life of a baby.

>>18167776
>One California study concluded that the “best age” for first birth, in terms of lowest rates of birth defects, is 26. Nice to know, I guess; that’s how old I was when my older daughter was born—and she was pretty perfect. A different study, based on national data, looked at a different measure of a baby’s health—rates of overall infant mortality rather than birth defects—and pinned the “best age” even older, at 32.

Depending on someone else to maintain you is always a bad idea. You never get to feel like you can spend money however you want and be whoever you want because there's always the feeling that you 'owe' the other person. And that's even without considering that you may divorce in ten years or he may die or whatever and you'll be alone without parents, with a child and getting into the job market for the first time at 30s and without a degree.

Be intelligent. If your parents are paying for your education, you're lucky as hell. Use that to invest in yourself. You can be a stay at home mom later if you still want to.

Go for it OP? Am I the only one who thinks a 19 year old getting married is a beautiful thing? This used to be the norm. Modern society has prolonged adolescence. People are less mature than they were before. I'll take high school sweethearts tying the knot over used goods 30 somethings living together with no future.

you know society is going down the shitter when 30 somethings is whats acceptable for marriage. early 20s is always the best. Sexual revolution really fucked us up

>>18167870
Well, hopefully you are the only one, yes.
At 18 you don't have the maturity to make it work. The vast majority of people who get married in their late teens/early 20s divorce - like, over 70%
Also, you most likely don't have the financial stability to run a household.

My grandparents got married when my grandma was 17 and my grandpa was 18. My grandma didn't finish elementary school, my grandpa stopped going to school when he was 10. They both had been working since. They built (literally) their house and moved in the next year. My grandma had 4 kids before turning 23, her last pregnancy nearly killed her and she had to get an hysterectomy.
Something like this isn't the norm right now. At 18 you're fresh out of high school, it's kind of necessary to go to college because otherwise you will never find a decent job, it's rare that just one person can work and give your kids everything they want/need.

>>18167870
Fuck off grandpa. Nobody is telling her not to get married or have kids. We're advicing her just to secure herself a future before. Picking up the quickest easy way without projecting to the future is awful advice.

>>18167870
Also, just to be truthful - people never routinely married at 18.

http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0005061.html
Look at 1890 median age statistics.

>>18167890
your grandparents probably are more mature than people of the same age. Today's youths are laughable

>>18167909
Well, sure. But it's great that they're immature.
My grandparents were mature because they had to drop out of school before puberty, work in the fields/their parents activities for most of their childhood. A 18 year old right now is halfway through his education and doesn't have anything to worry about.

>>18167925
Regardless they would have been more mature regardless because values of responsibility and self reliance arent taught today as they wete back then.

>>18167932
Do you think they took responsibility classes in the 40s? They were more responsible because they had more responsibilities, they had to work and look after themselves since they were children. That's it.

Maturity comes after you're given responsibilities.

>>18167793
thats why females are turned on by more experienced daddy figures. so he can provide stability while shes raisin the kid. also monogamy is not a must, otherwise men wouldnt produce this much sperm. but now these things are eww gross, right?

well, if you fuck with nature, nature fucks with you

enter unhappy modern age 101

>>18167947
We've been monogamous for at least 20-30 000 years. It's not "modern age".

>>18167965
With how much this debate pops up on here, I am seriously starting to think it would merit a sticky. IS MONOGAMY NATURAL? THE GREAT DEBATE.

I'm not saying it would convince anybody who's made up their mind, but then at least people could point to the sticky instead of rehashing the exact same argument every couple weeks.

>>18167982
Its not natural but it is the best for a healthy society.

You and your ancient boyfriend fill me with envy and rage. I crave and fetishize having a young housewife willing to bear my children, but instead I have a chubby math major gf who is terrified of pregnancy. I don't think women have it on "easy mode" in general, but fuck me if you don't. Bah.

As for your actual question, given that you've already discussed this life plan with them and they still disagree, it's impossible: you can't hide this lifestyle forever, and your parents will at least initially think you're this guy's live-in cumdump when they find out. Your only hope is to give it time and hope that your parents come around when you two have a stable marriage. And I'm sure they will eventually come around if that happens. But right now I think they're just worried that you're too young/getting suckered by this guy and that you'll fuck up your prospects if this all falls through.

Best of luck.

>>18167985
>t. healthy society

14 poster fell for this meh quality bait

>>18167584
>marry my 29 year old boyfriend (im 19), move into his house and get pregnant/be his housewife without my parents wanting to disown me?
>marry my 29 year old boyfriend (im 19), move into his house
>marry my 29 year old boyfriend (im 19),THEN move into his house
yeah you're supposed to live with someone for a while to see what theyre really like THEN move in not the other way around. this nigga is asking you guys how to gold dig and all fell for it

>>18168213
Living a woman to know if they are marraigable is a bad idea. The only time you should be living with a woman is if shell be bearing your children. You shouldnt be banging a woman who wont be your wife. If you break uo shell be used goods for the next guy who will date her. Serial monogamy and cohabitation are social ills.

>>18168227
You seem to have issues with having sex, not with living together.

Geez, you ever wondered why a 29 year old guy doesn't get girls of his age?
OP, you seem really naive. I know you need to make experiences in order to learn, but please don't endanger your own future.
You really want to clean up after a guy that is probably not able to do it by himself? For the rest of your life?

Please realize that you're not grown-up yet. Your papers might say adult, but you will change so drastically much in the next few years, you're not even remotely close to being grown up. And maneuvering yourself into a position where you end up without a job, without education and without money if you realize his behaviour is utterly retarded and outright dangerous, then it will just end up bad for you.

>>18168235
>you ever wondered why a 29 year old guy doesn't get girls of his age?
Because they're used up roastie whores who are well past their prime and are desperate for beta bucks? OP and especially her boyfriend are redpilled, and many cultures that actually value the role of men in relationships mock women who don't marry by 25

>>18168263
Dude, honestly, all the guys worth marrying are married already at 29.
He's probably mediocre as fuck.

>>18168280
Absolutely not true, look up marriage rates among men with higher education and salaries. They have higher standards, lower expected payoff, and often lower social opportunities for meeting marriage-oriented women. Both women and men of lower status tend to marry earlier, but men always tend to marry younger women with age differences increasing with status

>>18168233
Sex is reserved for your spouse.

>>18167584
do it anyway, you are not too bright for college. it's your best option

>>18168289
People who marry late (into their 30s) are much more likely to divorce.

Plus, marriages where one partner is significantly older and wealthier than the other are extremely more likely to fail.

To have a long lasting marriage, statistically speaking, you have to marry in your mid-late 20s, with a woman around your age who earns around the same as you do.

>>18168301
Then you have trouble with reading comprehension as well.

You can cohabit without having sex or being married. What is your issue with this?

>>18167870
It was the norm because everyone knew everyone before. You cant trust anyone now. The circumstances, life lenght was all different in the past. She should at least get a degree before getting married and if he likes her /at all/ he will be ok with not pumping her full of babies for a few years

Also, at those perfect times, many many woman died of childbirth and there was no vaccines

>>18167632
this

If you ignore everything else, atleast consider this. If this relationship were to fail, will you have a way out of it? Or will you be trapped in a potentially miserable life with no way of suporting yourself or your future children away from him. It's a real possibility to consider, even if your relationship is great now, a lot can change in a decade much less a lifetime. 1 year+ of knowing this guy is nothing.

That's the only real danger here. Living your life and making your own mistakes is one thing, but if you're going to totally surrender your financial independence to someone else and have the added burden/commitment of children you're not leaving yourself a lot of room for mistakes and setting yourself up for some very permanent consiquences for this decision.

I say if you want to live your dream of a domestic woman of the house that in itself is fine, but at the very least be able to take care of yourself.

It's always problematic when one person holds all the power in a relationship, that's how you get abusive relationships. Go and read up on the stories of victims. I don't know your bf or if he is someone who would do that but it's just unhealthy to be so totally reliant on someone. That's really what should be the point of feminism, not so much the choice of home vs career.

>>18167584
Your parents are liberals; they don't want you to procreate or have a functional family.

Did they give you any advice on majors? Probably gender studies so you could work at Shariabucks the rest of your life.

>>18168227
This is like, so much terrible advice rolled into one short post.

>>18167870
>adolescence is prolonged
>people are less mature than they were before
I think you meant
>back in the 40's any dipshit alcoholic could support his family of 5 with a factory job

>>18167606
>I'm her childs godfather
Cuck

>>18168325
The READING COMPREHENSION BLAAAAAGAGGAGGAGAAA
>>18168227
Haha fuck all that find a vagina and get the fuck IN THERE unless you're a faggot!!!
>>18167947
Yeah fuck me nature UNF!!! OH DADDY
>>18167776
Is that why you're such a fuckup? Ahahhahababhabaa

Wow there is so much terrible advice in this thread.

Do it OP, having a kid is the most happiest and fulfilling thing you can do. I have many friends who married young. And even my parents were close to you (mother was 20 father was 30). It happens all the time, and yeah you are young but since you love each other you will pull through whatever struggles lie ahead. You will be advantaged because you started your relationship earlier than most people, which means you will have more experience and understanding as an adult. I'm a guy and I really want kids too. I'm both jealous and happy for you. I wish you both the best.

If you want to be a housewife or a homemaker there's nothing wrong with that, but you need to slow down and really evaluate shit.

I'm 19 too and I'm a guy, but I had a failed engagement and it has really fucked me up emotionally, because I rushed into shit kind of like you want to and then it didn't work out. And of course, I didn't listen to anybody's advice because I was too caught up in my feelings. But seriously, don't make the same mistake as me. Just wait and if it's supposed to happen with this guy, it will happen eventually, but you don't need to drop your life plans for someone else when you're our age.

Don't get caught in something you can't get yourself out of later if it doesnt work out.

>>18167584
My father was 42 when he got married to my mom with 18. They were happy and married for 10 years.

After the divorce, they still remained good friends and he kept providing for the family. So I would say that ten years gap isn't much at all and don't see anything wrong if you want to build a family.

To avoid disowning, marriage is a must in terms of stability. But more important, try to live with him for an year before marrying. This will already answer if you two are compatible or not. Best luck.

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>>18167597
>my parents would disown me
No they wouldn't, and if they did you don't want them in your life anyway.

>ive never loved someone as much as this
I'm going to tell you something you probably don't know. Hell, the idea probably never even occurred to you. Ready? Here it comes.

Your feelings aren't the most important thing in the world. Marriage, a successful marriage, has little to nothing to do with "love" or "happiness." Marriage is about trust, purpose, and perspective. You're still in your relationship's honeymoon period. Five years from now things will be very different. A marriage is about building a life, continuing the family, and preserving wealth and assets.

In plain English, you will not "love" him like this in five years. I guarantee you that.

Also, ffs you're 19, you don't know shit. The law doesn't stop you from making these decisions, but you're honestly not qualified to make them. The reason your parents have threatened you with disenfranchisement is because you're about to make a big mistake, and they're *really* not looking forward to cleaning up your mess.

Also, speaking as a 29 y/o male myself, the fact that your bf is dating someone your age is extremely concerning. He's either extremely immature, manipulative, or both. I don't even do casual shit with girls who aren't old enough to drink. How is it even possible that you have anything in common? No offense, but how can he even listen to you talk for longer than thirty seconds?

Anyway... to answer your original question, I find it unlikely that they'll disown you. I say that as a parent. However you will *never* get their approval, because the situation is fucked, and you lack the perspective to see it because you're greener than turtle shit at this whole "life decisions" thing.

They love you. Try listening to them. Also there's nothing wrong with wanting to be a traditional female, but maybe travel a bit, see the world, enjoy yourself a bit before committing to motherhood.

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>>18170700
>Marriage ends in divorce
>This is considered successful
>Mfw

>>18170733

You guys really confuse me with this red-pill divorce nonsense. Why is it that marriage and relationships are the only thing that it isn't acceptable to fail at? As a human being from childhood to adulthood you will fail at a THOUSAND things, relationships included.

The poster never claimed the marriage was successful, you did, he just tried to communicate that a 10 year marriage that ends in divorce doesn't have to be a badge of shame. Why can't being on good terms with an ex be a positive learning experience, you know, like all the other dozen things you fail at in life before you succeed?

I dunno, man. Everything you do in life worth doing has the potential for failure. Everything. I don't understand how you guys are sometimes so capable of acknowledging that failure is an important part of life but as soon as the topic of marriage and divorce comes up you seem genuinely shocked and appalled by the concept that its okay to fail.

>>18170746
Exactly this. My parents had two kids (myself included) and ended up divorcing because they had both changed.

My mother fell in love with another man, didn't marry again but they were together for 20 years or so. My father went on to marry again with another person and had two other kids from that relationship.

Fortunately we all lived on the same city and got along OK. Would certainly prefer that no divorce occurred but would certainly be worse to force a couple to the point of hate and passive aggressive violence in the household. They were honest and kind to each other, simply broke up and moved along.

For me it was profit. Both my dad and step-dad were really positive influences in different manners. I've learned so much from them.

>>18170746
The difference between a marriage and an LTR is that a marriage is supposed to be a covenant. You don't just quit because "you're not happy."

Not that it matters; marriage these days is a meme, no-fault divorce is a thing, so it's basically what women do when they're like "hey I'm pushing 30, anyone want to sign a lease on my blown out puss until I get bored and leave in a few years, taking no less than half your net worth with me?"

And for whatever reason, betas still trip over themselves for that kind of deal.

Less and less as years go by, thankfully.

>>18167584
>#1 ensure that your boyfriend wants this
Consider speaking openly to him about your plans, will be easier if he agrees and proposes.

>#2 Now that you're betrothed you can drop out and get married.
Set a date, have a wedding, invite your family, don't make it too expensive.

>#3 you are now married to your boyfriend
have babies

>>18167589
>age difference hating
h8r