Let's hear it y'all

Cancer :/

>>18167318
I dont love her, fuck you all manipulative faggots.

>>18167318
i found out today that i am so ugly i can't even buy a woman a meal

So you going to let me see a doctor yet?

I woke up twice last night from seizures.

I'm tired. I'm so fucking tired.

I changed so much of me for her that I dont even know who I am anymore. Fuck her but I love her.

I just realized March 8th passed by just like any other day. In fact, I just barely missed seeing you. You had left the courtroom right before I got there. I can't even remember what I did the rest of the day. But I guess I'm glad I was able to forget that it would have been another anniversary for us.

Today when I saw you, I realized you have become a stranger. I used to be able to feel your presence when you were anywhere near. But today you weren't any different from anyone else in the room. In fact, I didn't even realize that was you at first. She told me that she saw you looking at me. I'm not sure if I'm glad we didn't make eye contact.

Haven't taken my meds in about a week. Going to cancel my doctor's appointment and see what happens. Surely I won't regret this later on.

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I'm really, really afraid I'm a fucking furfag. Seriously. I don't want to parade around on those gay fucking fursuits, but furry porn gets me turned on.

>>18167455
Then just don't wear a fursuit and jack off in the privacy of your own home

Can you just stop texting me while youre out drinking trying to fuck dudes? what the fuck, you really dont take a hint do you?

i'm mad that i saw you at my neighborhood grocery store when you have a perfectly fine one not five minutes from where you live

i'm mad that i'm still not over this yet due to lack of closure
you never told me why.

I'm mad at myself for being the way I am. ugh.

I spent the day with a friend of mine and realized she's the coolest person I know. She looks like little birds help her get dressed every morning while she sings to small animals. It will never work, but I haven't cared about anyone this way for years. I know she has or had feelings back at one point, but maybe I fucked up or maybe she's afraid. She's been kicked around by men all her life, and she's terrified of getting close to people. She's the first and last thing I think about every day, and I'd be lucky if I enter her mind once a week. She deserves a friend who doesn't want to sleep with her, and I care about her enough to not pull anything, but fuck is it hard. Maybe I'm a beta. Maybe I'm a coward. Maybe I'll tell her. We'll see.

Another day where I didn't work on my thesis, I'm a fucking idiot. Someone slap some sense into me please

I'm so tired. I've been battling this for over a decade telling myself it'll get better. But it won't. I think it's time I quit pretending.

>>18167318
i really want to drop out of college and marry my 30 year old boyfriend, be his housewife,and get pregnant immediately. but my parents would disown me.

>>18167561
...That's hot.

>>18167564
im 19

I'm tired of all the heartbreaks and disappointments.This is life,I know.But it hurts even if you try to prepare yourself for every possible scenario.It hurts even if you lower your expectations.

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How do I drop out of college, marry my 29 year old boyfriend (im 19), move into his house and get pregnant/be his housewife without my parents wanting to disown me? I can provide more details/answer questions if needed.

>>18167566
Even hotter.
>>18167572
Literally make a thread about it. I don't think you'll get much help here.

>>18167573
i meant to make a thread but i accidentally out it on here and it said i had to wait some time before i could delete it

Hey.

Girl I loved broke up with me several months ago. We're not on speaking terms but I'm forced to see her because of class and certain social groups we're a part of. Just recently I've started seeing her with another guy (someone who was her friend when we were dating but I didn't particularly like). I'm pretty sure they're dating now. How do I be in the presence of my ex and him and not have it completely kill me inside? I just try to not look at them and be cheerful around my friends but I think they can sense that I'm just trying to repress my sadness.

for fucks saaakkkeeeeeeeee

tell me already. lets get going already. for fucks sake I'm dying of boredom in my fucking cage.

Transport, motorways and tramlines
Starting and then stopping
Taking off and landing
The emptiest of feelings
Disappointed people clinging on to bottles
And when it comes it's so so disappointing

Let down and hanging around
Crushed like a bug in the ground
Let down and hanging around

Shell smashed, juices flowing
Wings twitch, legs are going
Don't get sentimental
It always ends up drivel

One day I'm going to grow wings
A chemical reaction
Hysterical and useless
Hysterical and ...

Let down and hanging around
Crushed like a bug in the ground
Let down and hanging around

Let down again
Let down again
Let down again

You know, you know where you are with
You know where you are with
Floor collapsing
Floating, bouncing back
And one day....
I am going to grow wings
A chemical reaction
Hysterical and useless
Hysterical and...

Let down and hanging around
Crushed like a bug in the ground
Let down and hanging around

i think my snake is debressed =(
[not a winky reference]

I want Marine Le Pen to win.

We've been friends for the better part of 10 years. You've hurt me in ways you can't imagine, and I'm sure I've hurt you too. It killed me when you did exactly what she did to me before and your reason was pathetic. I take the verbal bullshit because you are my only "friend" and your boyfriend is my only plug. If I had other options, I don't think I would hang out with you.

I fucked the hottest woman I have ever seen on a regular basis for a while, I'm a 5 at best, she is beyond 10. I developed feelings for her because we started as friends, thought she was developing them too, I was wrong. She swore me to secrecy, so the only person I have spoken to about this without anonymity is my therapist. I recently told her I needed some space and we haven't seen each other in over two weeks now but I still think of her quite frequently.

I really want to die right now. What do.

>>18167711

Smoke weed and drink the feeling away.

It's what I'm doing and it seems to be working juuuusstt fiinneee.

>>18167671
So, you realized The Glamorous Life's lyrics were posted in the last thread, therefor you decide to put your own song here.

Interesting.

...That reminds me, I should upload the Prince version soon. I stole it before Web Sheriff took it down.

I used to think everyone was like me, but none of you really do understand me at all. So let me spell it out for you. I know what is going on. I just don't care. Whatever details you alter, whatever lies you invent. The song remains the same. I can read you all clear as day. I can see through all the bullshit you spew.

>>18167731
This song just speaks to me. Just when I thought things are getting brighter things get dark again and my mood ends up where it was before. I just want a perfect day. Just once.

She told me she's cheating on you with her ex because you didn't know how to use your dick lmao.
Remember, she did tell you to not trust her. Do yourself a favor and drop her, or just change to friends with benefits. That way you can still get some ass while she still has the freedom to hook up with randoms. Plus, if you ever need money again she's still got you. I would tell you all this in person, but it'd be weird if I just came up and told you all this, right?

p.s.: It's also kind of odd that you're so irresponsible with money that you let your mother handle all of your finances, considering you're nearing 30 or something.

>>18167725
no weed, no alcohol

I get to ride this one out sober.

>>18167763
You know what, I have the same mentality. Just when things ascend to decency just once for me, I just get shit on somehow. Be it mentally or actually.

For example, I got an apartment, a good job with lots of hours and friends, all the games I could ever need to play, all the shows I ever wanted...but something inside me feels sadness and doubt, knowing full well something will go bad.

I don't know why, but I just can't feel happiness or excitement anymore. I don't know how to put it without being edgy, but it feels like something within me died.

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I am so fucking lonely.

I feel like my body is screaming at me to be with someone. But I don't want to, I don't like people, but this damn tightening in my chest won't go away.

>>18167353
hmmmmn, fuck life

>>18167383
be the person she fell in love with dawg

>>18167783
I lost my job three months ago. Lost my friends due to my depressed ass, have all the games and show to entertain me but those things means nothing when there are no one to enjoy a day with. I wish I could make someone happy without feeling like I'm hauling through.

For the first time in forever i feel happy, even if you have proven again that you're a complete baboon. This trip I'm going on will take years, but I'll come back and probably find you in the same place, doing the same thing. You've shown all the classic signs of significant mental health issues, please get help, and figure out how to manage yourself.

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>>18167678

>>18167338
Might not be I dunno could be psoriasis

>>18167823
Know you don't. You try to be sincere but deep down you are resentful and unforgiving. Stop lying to yourself, you hate me and you want nothing more than to win against me.

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i'm 35 recently unemployed and 2 1/2 years clean from all drugs and alcohol. i've fallen back into old ways slowly. stopped going to meeting, started gambling again (i'm also a
compulsive gambler) i also have been having fantasies lately about using xanax and crystal meth. help me.

Haha. That's funny. I just looked on my twitter feed, and saw an FDNY pic from the Daily News, with only one Firefighters name visible. And that name happend to be the same last name as the girl I'm interested in.

Kinda funny in a way. Don't believe in signs much, but maybe....

I'm tired, but still angry.

I hate the fuck that I genuinely don't want to fuck up our relationship but yet somehow I find ways of sabotaging shit.
I love this girl but for some reason I keep fucking things up. Worst of all, on her birthday.

What the fuck is wrong with me...

>>18167857
But maybe you could save 15% or more on car insurance?

It's not outside the realm of possibility.

>>18167884
True. It's possible I guess. And it's not like she has a particularly common last name either.

I feel like I've seen what life has to offer
But beneath the seams remains life unseen
The people with the same age as me tasting victory
And older brothers turning 30 drinking bittersweet defeat
Ain't it creepy? My classmates already married, with kids
Yet i'm still living a lucid dream behind on my health and fitness
Gloves and mittens, pussy and kittens
Already had it all once and it leaves me so smitten
Hittin these self help books off this green bookshelf
Just to prevent "self off" and to preserve myself
Hell, been there and not yet back.
Vision deteriorating but not yet black.
Envision these demons and angels every place that i visit
Every corner a midget selling shit as a business
I ain't ready to exit, unconsciously need to exist
Patiently observing the apple while I resist and persist

>>18167848
Stfu or i'm going to little baby your ass so hard. I couldn't hate you if I tried and you've gone over and above trying to make that happen. You're presuming I resent your actions or I couldn't forgive them, I've been through a lot worse than your foibles.

Fucking let me take over the world already holy shit.

>>18167887
>>18167857
Also, FDNY is the same entity that she plans to get work with soon. So... Seems a tinybit too coincidental

made some qt cashier at a book store lose her shit. She was all red and blushy and flirty. Should've got her number fuck. Next time I will lmao

>>18168018
Story?

I'm starting to become more and more disgusted with how gays act i.e. not caring about/hiding their diseases, being effeminate. But when i think about having a relationship with a woman it's not for me and i would be lying to myself if i forced it. How do i stop this void like plataue of no sex on either side?

I hop out, I'm dabbing...

God I fucking wish I'd never gotten cancer.

I could have dealt with my gran dying.
I could have dealt with my job prospects getting fucked.
I could have dealt with the six-year relationship ending.
I could have dealt with all of my friends evaporating while I wasn't paying attention, and only being left with those that expect me to always be fine.

But Jesus fucking christ, come on.

>>18167853
Ring up your local crisis hotline and describe your situation to them. They'll do you more good than anybody on here will.

It's just a phonecall, and you can hang up whenever you want.

I hate everything about you and your being. Spending hours with her a day acting like a little beta shitstain with no chance with a girl but stole her out from under me a day after our breakup. Fuck you, dude

>asked long time crush out
>she says yes
>burst of excitement
>text her to confirm the date
>she says shes busy
What's the point of living

>>18168081
But what if she's legitimately busy though? Imagine if she asked you out but there was absolutely no chance you could be free that day.
Is she free any other days?

I keep getting used, it isn't funny anymore. Why can't I trust my own intuition?

>>18168081
Could try to reschedule. It is possibly something came up

>>18168084
>>18168087
I haven't asked her if she's free any other days, or "when is she free", I just assumed that it meant she doesn't want to, since she didn't ask me herself to reschedule. Though she's kind of weird like that sometimes. I guess I should ask her when she's free. Yah her excuse sounded sort of legit I guess and she is often busy with many activities.
Thanks!

>>18168085
Are you sure you are being used? Maybe you are part of a relationship that benefits both parts somehow? I guess it's all about knowing when to stop rather than when not to join/begin. Well, you already know that. Good luck in the future

>>18168092
Being even mildly useful to you has made today worthwhile.
No u.

>>18168092
Could also be the she is just nervous about starting something, so she's using it as a way out. But that doesn't mean that she doesn't want to try something

>>18167966
Bullshit!

I didn't realize that the love from family depended on what kind of job you have, how much you're making and what sort of education you have. Every few months they check up on me and I feel like I'm being interviewed for a job but it's my family judging how nice they should be to me at the next family function IF they decide to invite or include me at all. I didn't know family was supposed to treat you like this.

>>18168096
I'm getting used because I'm too shy/calm to get angry over things, I'm clearly a masochist and too stupid for my own good.

Got a job, on the paper it said I would be working maximum 25 hours/week. When it came down to it I was working at least 100 hours a week, no extra pay for the extra hours.

Went on a "job interview" today, was basically handled a remote of sorts and got working. Scanning every article of clothing the store had, the "interviewer" said great work and then showed me the door.

I been jobless for almost a year now and I'm pretty much desperate to earn some form of income. So even if I feel in my gut that this is just crazy, I'm just glad to be doing something else than applying for jobs. And afterwards I get miserable again because I'm back where I started, jobless, used and could've spent that time applying for more jobs that would hopefully pay.

>>18168046
You aren't the first to go through this. For a long time I refused to date guys because men are filthy animals, but over time I met some A1 guys who changed my perspective and broke my heart. Part of being gay is enjoying fucking, don't you enjoy getting your dick wet? Being with anyone, man or woman takes time, trust and committent to build something strong and beautiful.

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>>18167803
I know this feel too well.

I don't know what to do.

I tried.

I should have known better.

It's too late now.

It's over.

I think I'm strong enough to do this.

Pleasure is defeat

any lawyers in here I can can ask legal /adv/ for?????

>>18167318
can't believe she left me for my "best" friend because he is rich?!?
also i am probably autistic.
My fetish is watching the world burn

You affect me too much. It's not your fault but why did you put our friendship on hold so suddendly? It kills me a little that I don't understand. I love you like you are my sister, but right now I feel hurt by you and sometimes feel some need to hurt you too. Maybe i'm just a mess with BPS, maybe you are the one who's a mess, maybe you're just somewhat selfish. I just miss talking to you and hanging out with you so much. But you don't seem to miss that and I won't be the one to try to go back to those times if you don't show that you want it first. Also, why and how the fuck did you became so atacched to him so sudendly? Fuck that! That fucking kills me!

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You're still in love with the guy that you put in jail for spreading revenge porn to everyone including your family.
You left him for me because I wasn't as good during sex and he was able to get an apartment before I could. Turns out if you fuck the same person for four years almost every day you get the hang of things. It doesn't matter anymore.
Meanwhile I'm the sorry son of a bitch that's still working to get your nudes taken down from the sites they were posted. Only one left then I can forget about you forever. As much as I hate you I can't help but feel sorry for you. To be tricked into believing you're in love with someone because they have more experience fucking you and provide a roof over your head, but treats you like absolute dog shit the whole time. Demands you delete your facebook. Takes your phone from you and looks through it. Even has a hard drive of all of the pictures and videos you sent him while he was in basic training as black mail in case you leave him. You told me yourself that he does all these things yet you're still with him. I'm not even that bad of a guy, I just lost all hope for us when you admitted to still loving him. What did you expect me to do? Drop everything and still sign the lease?

I still remember the first time you told me you were in love with me. It was so soon but I felt it too. All those nights we spent in hotel rooms, making you scream your lungs out and hearing someone jerking off to us the next room over that one time.
It wasn't enough though, was it. I'm not the type to treat you like shit and I guess that's what you need in your life. A clone of your abusive father.

People can change.
Even I can and will continue to do so.

I pushed you away with my immaturity.
I know I have been this way for years. My depression didn't help either. I started going to therapy because you helped me to get it. I was so apathetic to your love and I hated that I had become that way.

I can change, because you communicated some of the things that were bothering you about us. When you actually talk and treat me like an adult, when you communicate, I am more than willing to listen.

I don't know what you were looking for in our relationship but it clearly wasn't me. You scolded me for missing you, for being needy when we would only see each other once or twice a month. I know you had a busy schedule but we only lived about minutes away from each other, I only wanted a few once in a way. A phone call, even a text. I don't know why you never just told me I wasn't important enough for your time. My fault was putting far too much effort into something you didn't care about as much as I did.

All I can really say now, you called me immature and left for a mature relationship. I hope you learn that real relationships require time, and effort. Like tending a garden, the most beautiful ones require a human touch.

You on the other hand left it neglected and got mad at the soil for growing nothing but weeds. Maybe someday you'll learn that you were as much part of our failure as I was. A proper healthy relationship doesn't just happen like a fairy tale, no it requires two people willing to change, comprise and communicate. You never did anything of them. I really hope you learn one day, because I honestly did my best. You? I don't know anymore.

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I miss her lads. It's been 2 years since I dumped her and I miss her ;_;

I wasn't a bad friend just because I didn't like you back. Like, seriously? Stop posting shit about me online.
You were my bestfriend and I told you that. I was really happy to have you in my life.
You knew I didn't want a relationship with anyone. You knew how hard it was for me to even find energy for friendships. You even told me how well you knew that when you first told me you had feelings for me.
I really trusted you to be my friend because I did really care about you. How do you even dare to say I never gave a shit?
You were the one who fucked the friendship up by being needy and all over me all the time. You got mad at me for things I did and didn't do because you wanted me to behave like we were in a relationship and give you all my time.
I tried to talk to you and you told me you understood. But then you just went back to feeling sorry for yourself and put all the blame on me, just like you are doing now. Then you started to drink and behave like an ass, you stopped being the one who I became friends with. I didn't recognize you, I couldn't talk to you.
You even wrote online that you wanted to break the friendship off because it was "to hard for you". I just gave you what you wanted. But you didn't expect me to read that, huh?
Now I see you fucking up your life even more and first I got sad, because I still really do care. I tried to help from a distance.
But then you wrote all that shit about me online so I'll guess I show you what I really am like when I don't care.

I don't have anything big to get off my chest, but I was just at my ex fiancee's house because she wanted me to drop off something of hers that was at my house and I saw a framed picture of her new boyfriend. She never had a framed picture of me and she was going to marry me.

So on the way home I had to really convince myself not to buy a pack of cigarettes and start smoking again, and now I'm back at my appartment and I kicked my printer across the room and kicked my refridgerator. Needless to say it upset me to see that.

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>hate myself because of the kind of girls I like
>every now and then get depressed at the thought of being alone forever
>mentally beat myself thinking no woman would actually ever want me and I'm a pervert
>try to remind myself it's for the better cuz muh future and shit
>think I may just be trying to trick myself and override my male biology
>on the roller coaster of early adulthood we go

I have no motivation anymore and the girl I'm with makes me feel like shit unintentionally. She's also jealous of my best friend because she's hot and unfortunately I have secret feels for my best friend due to the shit in my relationship. Fuck me tho right?

I'm so fucking sick of your voice and hearing you yell at me all day everyday and call me useless and a retard. Honestly please do kill yourself, I almost hope you do.But you won't because your a fucking coward as much as you are a bully. I'd finally be at peace and not live in a nightmare every day. Getting into a relationship is such a fucking meme and overrated and a miserable existence.

>>18168467
I need more from you. I also told you I can change to meet your requirements.
in what way am I fucking up my life even more?

What you said is all true, but what remains is a really strong bond between two people who love each other. I think that bond is worth working on, I know we could progress beyond this game of emotional tennis. I first saw your posts on here almost 2 years ago, you pleaded with me to stay with you, I've read every single post in these threads for that long. In that time I went from being full of energy and life, which was all for you, to completely depressed and insecure, that's when I learned that you prefer to be looked after and nurtured. I guess I said you didn't care because whenever I really needed help you made me feel like asking you to do anything was a major chore.

My drinking was a problem, I've worked that out already. Im much healthier and happier than when i was an alcoholic idiot.

The one thing that remains is for us both to open up and share our experiences from the past year, I have stories to tell. My instinct tells me that the limited version of events I'm aware of doesn't tell much of your story. If you recall, it was sharing our stories, hopes and dreams that brought us close in the first instance...

>>18168541
I think you got the wrong gal. I'm sorry.
But if you care that much about the person you thought it was, I think you should write to them. Sounds like you've done alot of work with yourself and grown. Show them that. Good luck.

>>18168468
well it's neither something small to get off your chest anon, how long since you two broke up?

i wish i could get over it but i can't. your lie infects every part of our relationship now- i keep thinking when you don't answer me that you're talking to them, i keep thinking you still have feelings for them even though you promised me you don't. the thing is when you lie continuously like that, a part of me can't trust what you say in the future. i try so hard to get over it but i have so much at stake and so much to lose. i wish i could see inside your brain, see everything for what it truly is and not just what you're telling me.

>>18167318
I want to text her so badly. Maybe she just forgot, airhead that she is. I don't want to assume the worst like this board is always trying to convince me I should.

All the miscommunication and bad things that happened in our relationship... I'm so sorry about everything, L. I know you don't browse this board and don't read it but how I wish you would. That night, what I did was so unacceptable. I was drunk and should have brought it up to you initially. Guess karma got me back later that night huh? I wish I could go back and do things right, treat you right, show you off to the world like the princess you are. But alas, you're with him now and have been for over 4 months. I hope things are working out and that you're happy - I really do. My heart still aches for you sometimes and I'm still having a hard time adjusting to being alone. I fucked up so many times, and even when I had my paranoid episode you stayed with me. I was so blind and selfish... I still am growing and have a lot to learn but I hope that you can forgive me for everything I did. I'm so sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry I wasn't the one. I wish you'd unblock me. I miss you. Perhaps this is for the best. I love you. Take care.

Ahh, I'm miserable.

i still love her...

>>18168117
They're not suppose to treat you like that. My parents are proud of of me as long as I'm not out on the streets stealing, killing, and drug dealing, and trying to do something with myself. And your parents should be similar.

What's wrong with the world, mama
People livin' like they ain't got no mamas
I think the whole world addicted to the drama
Only attracted to things that'll bring you trauma

Overseas, yeah, we try to stop terrorism
But we still got terrorists here livin'
In the USA, the big CIA
The Bloods and The Crips and the KKK

But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And when you hate then you're bound to get irate, yeah

Madness is what you demonstrate
And that's exactly how anger works and operates
Man, you gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love, y'all, y'all

The second she asked me if i told anyone about me having a crush on her i knew i failed, but the answer isnt out there yet! May happen soon. Probably not.

Arousal, Accept, calmness, to share with others.
Excitement, commitment, empathy.
Unity, fascination, understanding.
Peacefulness, generosity, happiness.
Harmony, humour, hope.

Inner strenght, inspiration, interest.
Power, relieve, loyalty.
Bliss, compassion, courage.
hilarity, care, exhilaration.

Optimism, surprise, positivity.
Respect, serenity, self-esteem.
confidence, beauty, sorrow.
stability, pride, strength.
Sympathy, gratitude, satisfaction
Satisfied silence, forgivness, trust.
faith, comfort, patience.

development.

Break up with him and let me fuck you like the little girl you are

I should have stayed a NEET.

I would have spent less money, made less substantial fuck ups, and so much more if I had just gone into a trade or become a fucking trash man or some shit. I hate what I've done to myself, I don't even know if I want to do this shit for the rest of my life.

I won't feel happy ever again until I know what it's like to get a paycheck again.

You sometimes become so deeply focused on whatever you're doing. It's like you cancel out everything else around you.

my phone finally stopped ringing. yay.

>>18169007
Grow up I.

Should I bother making this? No one will look at it anyway. No one will comfort me. No one will try and show me even an ounce of empathy. The most I'll likely get is "oh that uh kinda sucks I guess". I've suffered a lot. I want to hear a bit more than that but that isn't something you straight up ask for.

>>18168582
Idk. It's been on and off forever but I think its finally the end.

>>18169025
RUDOLPH the red nose reindeer....

>>18169049
Stop being a coward

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>>18169054

-E
Fuck you, you stupid fucking cunt. I put everything I had into that relationship, and in the end you couldn't even be fucked to talk to me. Instead of giving a damn, you just let it all fall to shit without so much as lifting a finger. Go fucking kill yourself, you selfish gook trash.

Sincerely,
B

Lame the fuck pig moderator is shit. Ching chong ugly chink go kill yourself harder you cuuuuuuuuunt!

>>18169037
at least we can try anon.

I wonder why I keep coming back to these threads, I say the same thing every day. I know it'll lead to nothing, but I still can't comprehend it. How could everything get so shitty, so effortlessly? It feels as if I've been emotionally castrated. I walk around stone-faced now, tired and with a dull pain in my head at all times throughout the day. I have no hobbies left, my passions have dried up, and I can't even bring myself comfort from typical "sad" activities like lying down in a hot shower or listening to sad music. If I try to improve, try to have conversations with people, it doesn't feel good either. Every bit of magic in life is gone. Sex drive's gone too. I mean, christ, I'm only 18. Why doesn't anyone tell you how godawful and empty life can become with no warning?

Maybe it's just hormones. I hope to god it is. There are people in forums that have had my problem for 10+ years. Maybe I'm one of them.

This is all too much. Fuck.

I feel bad about my ex girlfriend because I wasn't strong enough to leave her the first time.

>she cheats on me
>i catch her
>she lies her way out of it
>i don't believe her, but go along with it anyway
>eventually see her cheating again, and actually break up with her this time
>some time later, decide it wasn't that bad, we get back together
>she cheats on me again
>I break up with her
>some time later, decide it wasn't that bad, we get back together
>this time, we drag the relationship on for another year
>i break up with her again 'cause I never got over her cheating on me
>feel like I led her on the whole time, she really tried to turn herself around and make me happy
>i wasn't happy, and still hated her for what she did, and all the lying that happened.
>it's been 6 months since we broke up
>i'm starting to think it wasn't all that bad and we should get back together again.

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>friends keep trying to get me to hook up with coeds
>secretly attracted to little girls

What do

>>18169137
Anon, you need to break this mindset cycle. For both your sakes.

>>18169112

>>18169137
Get some fucking self respect. For shame.

>>18167803
22 Yr old KV here (not handholdless though), it hurts. Im not even ugly, its literally all my autistic fault.

I'm tired of these assholes shit talking and trying to "warn" me about someone who's been nice to me. This person has never tried to fuck me over or tell me what to do, and we have enjoyable conversations. Unlike these jerks who try to command me around, make me feel like shit all the time, and act like they're better than me.

>>18169137
>>i don't believe her, but go along with it anyway
Go fuck yourself.

>>18168467
You shouldnt have flirted. You were doing the type of stuff you see in the intro to a porno and then you told me you dont want a relationship?

I hope by 'from a distance' you mean you are getting out of my life because i never want to see you again. Dont worry about me. Ill be fine once you are gone.

>>18169329
Not your gal either.
I was straight up from day one how I feel about relationships.

But I have some advice for you.
1. Life isn't like a porno.
2. If a person tell you that they don't want a relationship, they don't want it. It does not matter if you think they are flirting, if you feel uncomfortable, tell them to stop with it. But if they told you they don't want a relationship just fucking get that in your head. It does not matter how you think they act, listen to what they told you.

>>18169387
Yeah its fine she doesnt want a relationship i just need her out of my life after she started bending over and arching her back in her underwear so i could see the outline of her vagina through her panties from behind and sticking her tits in my face in her underwear after making her nipples hard and stuff like that.

>>18169401
Yeah, definitely not me.
If she got undressed and stuck her stuff in your face but didn't want anything that is fucking weird. Hope she leaves you alone and you can get on with your life.

>>18169419
Yeah i dont know why she did that but it fucked me up

I want death I want death I want death I want death

I don't like giving blowjobs and enjoy sex the most in missionary position.

>>18169137
I'm in a cycle like this but I think I'm finally getting the self respect that I won't let her come back into my life if she comes crawling back again. I reccommend you do the same.

>>18169445
Make sure your partner knows this. Also, from time to time you have to take one for the team and give a bj. Compromise.

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Ive been thinking... Are memes bad for me? I've been laughing at smug frogs too long. Is it bad for my sense of humor? Hopefully not, I still to this day think baneposting is the funniest thing ever. Mercy on me...

>>18167318
I don't know what I'm feeling but I'm feeling it so badly. i probably let one of the best people I could ever have go, because I wasn't ready for a new relationship. And that sucks now, we don't talk anymore. At least I want him back as a friend, but I hurt him too much and I know that. But he was and is amazing, I just don't know why I don't want to be with him? But I do want to be with him. Is he too boring for me? Too fragile? It's like if we were rain, he'd be drizzle and I'd be a hurricane. But he's one of the most sincere people I've met and he has never done anything wrong. Why can't we choose who we fall for. I'd choose him in a heartbeat.

I say that I'm still interested in you, but I'm actually more interested in another girl. I'd like to stay friends and all maybe, but I like the other girl. She's less of a slag.

>>18169531
What's a slag? Not a native here

>>18169433
If you want it so bad, why haven't you gotten it?

>>18169535
A slag is a term used over here in Britain to define someone of the female gender that often "gets about" if you know what I mean. In this case, this girl has told me she got eaten out, and I'm sure there's stuff before but she reckons she wants me "both romantically and sexually". Don't know if she's just horny.

I'm disgusted by my girlfriend because she is a rape victim who let the faggot get away with it

I want her to kill herself for being so weak

But I love her in some weird way

>>18169545
You're a degenerate if you think because she can forgive she should cease to love. Quit trying to be edgy. Hope she dumps you, this is of course if 'she' exists.

>>18169551
*live

>>18168464
Has she moved on?

>>18169551
>>>18169545 (You)
>You're a degenerate if you think because she can forgive she should cease to love. Quit trying to be edgy. Hope she dumps you, this is of course if 'she' exists.


Go back to /b/, faggot.

She didn't forgive, she was weak and timid and let him go free.

I hate her for being so fucking weak that I want to bully her into killing herself.

I resent her.

>>18169551

She is also ungrateful, unappreciative, mentally fucked up, and argumentative.

>>18169551
I hope she does too.I can always complain but never can make myself leave her.

>>18169563
Yawn. Heard it all before faggot. Do you not understand that you aren't acting morally.
>>18169588
Why would she be at all grateful of a bigot like you? You even said you want to bully her into killing herself, are you that far on the spectrum

>>18169304
Like I said, my big regret was not ending it where it started, but God damnit she treated me so well outside of that.

>>18169603
I have helped her for years through her bullshit and she has never even tried to keep the relationship from falling apart.

I do everything myself and it is sickening emotionally vampiric. I will be glad when she is gone.

I do not care about morals after almost three years, I can't take anymore of this.

>>18169610
It's evident she's been through a lot. You should help her but at the same time voice your opinions and if it falls apart, so be it. But there's no need to be a vengeful edge-lord.

It's not even a fucking relationship anymore. I don't even see why we waste each other's time now.

We both know that I will try and she won't.

>>18169628
Just end it then. You're clinging on to something that doesn't exist. You're just hurting yourself.

>>18169624
Does she do it to the faggot who raped her?

No. She does it to me.

Does she do it to her mother who beat her, insulted her, and solicited her for sex at 11 to a grown man?

No. She does it to me.

I want to blow my brains out so I never see her again.

If there is a heaven and we were both going, I'd go to Hell to avoid her.

>>18169634
I love her too much to leave but I want to make her suffer or drive her away.

I made shitty work of something at work yesterday, and I think by tomorrow it is going to be fairly obvious. Feels bad. It's not so much that my boss will be upset which he probably will be. I just hate doing a bad job of anything and I end up doing it more often than I'd like.

What is really bothering me though is this sense of dread when facing up that my ideals are ultimately futile and have no real value to anyone. Reality hits hard, and no amount of delusion can deal with it. Idealism is a suffocating curse.

>>18169711
Why did you do a shitty job? Did your employer not give you enough time or was it something else?

>>18169728
Honestly it was straight neglect. I don't feel comfortable explaining what the task was, but I definitely straight did a shitty job because I was too busy trying to talk to coworkers because I'm deprived of social interaction and really needed the attention.

>>18169746
Have you been with your current employer for a while? Some business owners will overlook infrequent poor performance if the guy is usually pretty good and has been around for a while.

>>18169771
Yeah this is my 4th year, and I suppose it is fairly infrequent, but in this line of work it's easy to fuck things up and easy to feel like your labor is of little value.

There's nothing that can be done. I've fucked up things before. I'm just disappointed in myself, and it's hard not to spiral down.

>>18169792
If you are in a line of work thats easy to fuck up dont beat yourself up over it man. It happens. Hopefully nobody will make a big deal out of it or even notice at all.

>>18167318
I have lost all faith in my country and am seriously considering immigrating

>>18169799
Thanks for the kind words, anon. Here's to hoping that I'm just worrying too much.

>>18169803
Bye Felicia

Dont you just love when girls are confusing as fuck? Especially shy ones?

The funny thing is the girl I had in mind does one or two of the things that would seem like shes not interested. But also does stuff that heavily implies interest.

She'll never make time for me, but she's busy as fuck. (Known before i became friends)

But she'll talk for hours about random stuff, and will let me in on her personal life. And in groups she seems indifferent to me being near her. So.. I don't know


Also, she has randomly found and sat next to me, would lock eyes from a distance as sorta smile when I am passing. But she also would go and try to make it less awkward for me when were talking in person and move the conversation forward

>>18169839
Maybe she acts that way in group to see of you'd act any different to her arpund pther people. A test to see if you wpuldnt be embarrassed to be with her. Sounds like she's into you, and you have to meet her halfway. Take some initiative if you already haven't. This cpuld be good for you!

I've held back on posting about this anywhere because I was scared it might get back to the person I'm talking about, but since the chances are slim and anybody I know who reads this board will probably be sympathetic with me, fuck it. I'm tired of keeping it bottled up and I want outside opinions on it.

I was in a relationship with a woman who I feel was abusive to me, and now my self esteem is much lower. I'll try to provide only the relevant details and not say anything that would identify people involved.

When we first met she was nothing but sweet to me. I'd never been in a relationship, so it felt wonderful to finally get all this love and affection. But slowly she got more irritable towards me. At first it was pretty minor, but it got more intense, and then physical. She's punched me in the face, hit me in the face many times, thrown things at me, hit me with a shoe a few times. Often over really minor shit too, like that she doesn't like my driving, or I forgot to get something, or I got her food order wrong, or hid my cigarettes from her when I said I was going to quit smoking.

But what felt worse than that was some of the shit she's said to me. Telling me other guys were better in bed than me, telling me to get in a car accident, saying she hates me and is never coming back (and then coming back), telling me over and over that I'm stupid. She'd sometimes tell me that she hit me because it was the only way to get things through to me sometimes, and I guess I internalized that, and started thinking I was dumb. It got to the point where I'd start flinching when she'd just go to touch my hair or something. And I got in the attitude of if she's in one of these moods I better just shut up and put up with it, because whenever I tried to stick up for myself she'd just storm off and not talk to me.

She also broke up and got back together with me several times. I let her. And I feel pathetic and like it's my fault. I still don't know if it's the end.

>>18169637
Just break up and move on. Shit you are crying for attention and it triggers me. You got it off your chest, good job.

>>18169845
Were rarely in a group together. Last time was close to a year ago.

And she knows's I'm interested in her and she said "Well I really appreciate your honesty. I'm just so focused on myself and what I'm doing with my life, I don't have the time to pursue anything with anyone"

So who knows..

>>18169858
Ohhh nevermind. Sounds like you may be misreading tjongs or she just enjoys leading you on/being flirty here and there. Move on anon

>>18169848
Its the end man. Sounds emasculating and terrible for ypur self esteem and happiness. Get put. You CAN do better for ypurself and you will unless you're too big a puss to change things. I challenge you

>>18169863
Eh, She always had some little signs, mainly staring and randomly finding me since before we were friends. Also, I know she works 2 jobs, along with being a student and doing Volunteer work. So I can fully believe her excuse.

Friends seem to think she's interested but buying time. Also, she's very shy and hasn't had a relationship before. So

>>18167318
im trans, have to take antidepressants. supported by my family who never taught me anything self sufficiency which i now have to teach myself.

i have limited schooling, and parents no longer talk to me (and dont know im trans yet). I have no friends I havent alienated and just sit around sick spending my money on caffeine and light drugs.

I dont want to suicide because its terrifying and illogical but i am ready to move somewhere to start over but have no idea how to do that or fend for myself really. So im stuck.

Id rather be poor and away from it all than wealthy wellfed and around toxic people and doing nothing.

>>18169877
Am you don't sound wealthy at all. You need some more routine on your life to be honest. Maybe find a part time job, eventually move out and make new friends. Surround yourself with forward positive people. Spendibg too much time to yourself seems dangerous in your case. Fond what makes you happy. Not content, but truly joyful

If you just admit you developed feelings for him while we were together id actually have a small shred of fucking respect for you, but as it stands you're a spineless bitch who gives it up at the first sign of attention and Im glad this is over as i'd rather it happened now 8 months in then if when I went in the Navy. Fuck you FM

Dear S,

I know you like me, you know i like you. Youre so lovely to be with, but im nervous as fuck. I see a big future for us. I want to make sure you wont ever get sad. I want to teach and i want to love. I'm sure that no one on this earth can give you what i can give you. You might think im some player, but im exactly the opposite. I dont know what to do when i am texting, talking or thinking about you. I hope my shyness wont get in our way.

Much love C

My father drank himself to death last year and I blame my mother. I can't fucking stand the sight of her anymore.

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Took a nappy and I have to say I was worried I'd wake up to a thousand missed calls. I'm grateful I can have peace from empty threats and bullshit and if not, I have 2 years to makeup for being used and lied to. Idk why I'm being tested, I learned from a manipulator, I covered my tracks. Face facts you're a bad person who doesn't feel remorse for what you've done to me and you deserve worse. From one psychopath to another.

I want. to go. home. what the fuck even is this place? why are we still here?

>>18167514
no one's going to do it for you, slap yourself.

>>18167989
we're in a holding pattern. soon.

________________________

FFFFFUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK. it's all under ice. there's no home.

>>18170051

Honestly I'm not even feeling bad for what I did to you. You played your part in this too. So to think yourself so innocent is laughable. At least I never hid what I was. Unlike yourself. You were trash to me and got treated as such.

But It's okay now. Come back, we can be fucked up together.

>>18170069
Go back to your containment board

There's nothing on my mind. There's nothing I want to get off my chest. Nothing, nothing at all.

>>18167318
I want to die

>>18169641
If you want to make her suffer, you don't really love her.
>>18167572
Don't.
>>18169170
Therapy

She's the pickiest eater I've ever met
She's out of shape, not fat but incredibly lazy
Also filthy, her room and car are absolutely disgusting
She hates anime/manga, the Japanese videogames I play, she hates the WM/AF combo in general despite claiming to be progressive
She likes the most normiecore music
And she got shit grades in school/college
on top of not really staying informed news-wise

Tying everything together, she is a selfish person who has had shitty taste in men in the past (attracted to arrogant manipulators, I'm the first one not like this that she's gone out with, which is probably just luck at this point)

on paper she and I have nothing in common except for mutual physical attraction

I'm too weak to break it off, I don't want to hurt her
but goddam I'm not happy

>>18170121
I'm a placid person. I don't feel any strong emotions. I don't know what motivates me to write this post out. I'm a B student. I do just enough to get me by, without having no noticeable hallmarks myself.

I'm not who I'd like to be. I don't know if I ever will.

The older I get, the less ambition I have to do anything with my life, and I think I've reached a point where I'm content with working a shit tier retail job my whole life, living cheaply, and pursuing solitary hobbies for happiness and comfort

I've come to think that not everyone is meant to do impressive things and live large and hold a respectable title and there's nothing wrong with that and I should just seek content in my own lowly place in life

>>18167455
Sort yourself out anon

I noticed on my GF instagram she removed my name with a love heart from her tag line. She's seemed extra argumentative lately but other than that things are fine I think? Does her removal the love heart with my name on instagram mean anything?

How to geniuly learn from your own mistakes? And how to recognize your own faults and flaws if it wasn't for the already obivious ones? At this rate i dont want to improve at all because none of this will happen

>>18170348
Recognizing flaws and mistakes and learning from them is basically the midpoint between self-loathing and overconfidence, you can't do it if you're too far on either side of that spectrum

There's supposed to be a cheat code for happiness.

it's so unrealistic, i just want someone to treat me like i'm a 6 year old for the rest of my life because honestly emotionally i can't think past that level. my childhood consisted of me crying in a corner constantly with scars and bruises all over my body, being yelled at and called vulgar names. i just want someone to see that i've had a rough life, i want someone to hold me and tell me they will look after me now, and in return i can give you the most faithful, pure, undying love there is, i would dedicate my life to you.
i'm very sexually active with my partner and i work, so it feels like i'm not asking much in terms of the dynamics in a relationship but i don't know, i guess i am.

i'm just bitter, you told me you would be all this for me, you told me you would be my family, you told me you would understand that all my pieces aren't there, but you lied. i just want a family so badly.. me and my future partner, someone who treats me like a 6 year old 90% of the time. someone who understands i'm the most jealous person in the world but i'm also willing to cut myself into pieces for you.

i just wish i could be normal, but i never will be and maybe i'll just have to accept i'll always be alone. i didn't ask to be like this.

The only person I write with online doesn't want me to get real so I stopped talking to him but I can't help these outbursts when I suddenly just want to take out all of my thoughts only to hear "dude what the hell are you talking about" . Now it's just me and this thread and that's how it should be,looking at how terrible of a person I am. I shouldn't talk to anyone about my thoughts. They should stay where they are.

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does this mean i have my safe zone back?

Somewhere in Narnia I know Reepicheep is living forever and that keeps me going.

>>18170375
This is something I realized too

I have a handful of really close friends that I'm pretty open with, but when I need to vent for catharsis, I save my deepest, most neurotic thoughts for rambling anonymous posts on 4chan, usually dealing with issues of deep-seated insecurity and inferiority complex

Some things are best kept to yourself no matter how much you want to scream them

I need answers

>>18167318

I left my wife for you.

I told you I would give it all up and I did.

Now we barely talk - I drive all the conversations and it doesn't make that you still say you feel the same way when you're about as distant as someone could be.

If it was a game - you should have let me know before I fell for you and threw it all away.

I also don't regret anything...like you wrote in your poem "Worth the fall".

Fuck we're a wreck...we should be a wreck together.

just get rid of this old fuck already. how many years has it been and you're still afraid to have a real relationship on equal footing. i am too but i think im finally ready after being alone so long

i didn't know what i had back then, i feel like a jerk off, i want to show you that i want another chance, but i have too much pride. can we please just do this?

This one guy in my group of friends pisses me off. I don't know if I'm overreacting or if he's just a dick.
>Bf has been friends with him a long time ago
>He "rejoins" our group of friends
>Seems like a chill guy
>2 guys, 2 girls (him and bf the guys, me and another friend the girls)
>He is especially nice to other girl
>We get along
>Bf gets salty at games, the other guy mocks him for it
>"You don't have to get salty because you lost"
>"It's just a game"
>It does not sound like a joke
>Meanwhile, other girl gets quiet and seethes when she is mad at games
>I rage harder than bf
>Guy doesn't say anything to either of us
>Only picks on bf
>Will "jokingly" trash talk one game, then want to play a different game
>anytime my bf makes a joke towards other girl like calling her a jew or something, guy will say "don't be rude"
>it sounds like he is joking but he does it constantly
>It gets repetitive
>Either he is taking the joke too far or he's being serious
>I sense an extreme air of narcissism around him, despite his outward self-loathing

>>18167603
Sounds like something I went through a few months back. Maybe improve yourself by lifting or joining new social groups. It's likely not a rebound relationship, but try to become okay with just being yourself. Maybe someone else will come around and you'll start something.

>>18167318
Lived a few years all by my own without many emotional bumps (I was also quite happy), but in the past 2 days I suddenly felt fucking alone and it's downspiralling like crazy.

The last time I went low I almost attempted suicide. I'm scared.

So what, I take the car and start driving. Odds are I get pulled over on some bullshit trumped up "Your headlights were out" case then go to jail for not having a license. Then blah blah blah it returns t o normal but now worse.

I can't win. No matter how hard I look for the truth there is no way for me to get it. This isn't a movie, there aren't any weak points for me to attack. There are no over the top hints for me to notice and... again, there aren't any weakpoints.

You have complete and utter control and there is no way for me to get out unless you fucking let me out.

SO LET ME OUT. FOR FUCK'S SAKE.

Fuck your timeline. Just get it over with you pieces of shit.

>>18170424
>
He's being a dick. He's picking favorites. You're not overreacting.

M,

You're a good friend. I really like talking to you. I don't really have any feelings for you though, and I am pretty sure you don't have feelings for me too. But the fact you got jealous when your friend asked me for my kik does raise a question.

H,

I will write you a letter soon; just wait for a while. I have ADHD, and it is difficult for me jot down my thoughts in a sequence. Please bare with me; you'll get your letter soon. Honestly, I wish you were here with me. And one day I hope we both work for Kashmir. Stay strong.

- S

This fucking stand-up comedy show man. This person's funny but god, don't expose me like this.

>>18168331
initials?

>>18170500
I thought I was overreacting because I'm super protective of my boyfriend and I practically wish death upon those who mess with him. That's a little exaggerated, but you know.
He keeps praising this friend of his as well, he is bothered by his dick moments but still keeps saying he's a nice guy. He's too nice and forgiving towards him.
The guy even sounds like a douche.

Still not over this.

Friend of mine turned out to be a fucking sociopath who used my words and understanding of relationships/romance to emotionally and psychologically manipulate a female friend of his.

As it turns out she and I have an insane amount in common but the emotional manipulation meant we didn't develop strong feelings for or trust one another.

Found out what was going on, confronted the sociopath and his friend, got her away from both of them.

The damage is done, though. It's been months and I'm still not fully able to trust people, and I think about her often, don't feel much for other girls I've been with, don't care too much about socializing.

I know from her perspective, she probably feels used, objectified, victimized.

she doesn't know how much I cared for her.
How much effort and how many sacrifices I made so she'd find her way to a loving relationship like she wanted.

I hope she's healed.
I'm not okay if she's not okay.
But I guess I'll never know.

I'm seeing my doctor tomorrow to find out if my ultrasound showed testicular cancer. I don't have insurance and cancer will get me dropped from the military a month before I'm supposed to ship out (I'm in the delayed entry program). What am I supposed to do?

I'm a 20 year old virgin. I'm usually rated at either 6/10 or 7/10 in terms of attractiveness. In my first year of uni rn. Can't seem to pull a good looking bird. Do I keep on trying or do I settle for one of the horde of hamplanets that want my dick? (I get hit on by like 5 fat birds every night)

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>>18170551
If I wasn't familiar with UK language, my thoughts would immediately go toward pic related.

Don't fuck the hamplanets. Are you a beta? If you are, then work on your confidence. You can probably land a decent looking girl if you try.

you know how when somebody complains about their job and the usual response is that "you're not your job?"

what if my job is all i have?

I like her a lot, it's so lame, I'm so lame, I feel like a kid

>>18170554
I woke up drunk after a failure of a night and I'm feeling pretty shit. I'm fairly low confidence but it's slowly building since I have some pretty good mates now to back me up. Thanks for the support. I'll be sure to avoid hamplanets like the plague.

I wish I were enough. I think I might break up with my bf, and honestly the thought of that hurts me.

I know that he cares about me. But I dont think I'm the one for him. It hurts but there is nothing I can do. I can change into the person he wants, and I can't force him to settle for someone who doesn't deserve him.

I just wish I was stronger. At least then maybe my heart wouldn't hurt enough. As much as I try, Im not enough. It breaks my heart having to accept the truth.

I'M HITLER

waiting and wiating and waitnainginaginging

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>that feel when you suddenly crave sweets and he eats all the chocolate chunk paleo cookies

>>18170696
>https://youtu.be/szup-a9SUrw [me]

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>>18170680
mein führer

>>18170704
I don't have a micropenis though. I might be hitler and the one but I have a perfectly average 6 in dick.

the entire world has seen it... which is a bit weird but whatever.

I'm really tired of the game and want this to be over. I have wanted it to be over for months now and here we are... still pointlessly posting on a fake chinese image board that exists only for me to rant and ramble to kill time.

Suck my dick I'm autistic hermaphrodite fat hitler

>>18170714
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9dZnLwVu5w

>>18170724
kinda like that yeah.

Fuck you Marge and your divisive bullshit and helping shitty people hurt me. Idk what your fucking problem is but you're one of the few women I've ever loved and it seems like you can't stop helping shitheads who want to hurt me. Fuck your heightist, elitist, black dick sucking, ageist, foreskin wanting privileged shit. You know I'm not smart as you because of all the shit people put me through. It's difficult to get a education while running for my life. Idk why this year had to happen again only to remind me I'm nothing you could ever possibly want. I don't want to be friends either. You're so beyond lucky to have never been forced to be near half the people I have. Goddamn fuck you

Fuck you,
O

>>18170750
Oh and fuck your fat shaming childish bullshit. Your 30 something. Act like it.

It would have helped if you fucking wrote me but nooo spoiled princess just fucks whatever shit that sends her crap in the mail. You spent more time talking to people who send you more then me. Fuck you freak

>>18170759
*Gore not more

>>18170704
The hand looks like it's been photoshopped into the pic.

>>18167603
meds... or leave that place.

or you can get mad and say I HAVE FORGOTTEN YOOOU! FOREVER!

I know you're thinking about killing yourself. And there must be something extremely wrong with me because I almost hope you do it. You disgust me. It would be lovely to know that you could never hurt anyone the way you hurt me. I've lost all hope of you becoming a better person. How can you when you don't see anything wrong with yourself?

I was swapping nudes with some 6/10 chick that wanted to bang nearby. Problem was that I was drinking and it stemmed from a depressive episode and me just wanting to get laid for the first time because I'm an insecure piece of shit.
My question to you /adv/ is how do I let them down after sending nudes and telling them I wanted to bang, without sounding like a douche.

I wish you and I weren't so different. I wish i could have lived with you happily without wishing for something you couldn't give me. You have the most beautiful soul of anyone I have ever met, and knowing that you're now moving on is devastating to me. I really loved you EL, i thought you were the love of my life. I wish you all the happiness that i could ever wish you. I'm praying for you. I will always carry a piece of you with me. I hope you don't settle for anything less than what we had. I love you. I love you so much. Goodbye then, sleep well pretty girl.

>>18170808
this reminds me of my depressed ex too..
I thought id never say something like that, but now im starting to think it. She only hurts everyone in her life, maybe shes right she should kill herself

Fuck I want to be a sexy lady already. Just fucking lets get going, come on. We got work to fucking to assholes why are you pissing around? I need surgery, facial reconstruction, nose, jaw, eyes, voice. can do the titties or whatever the fuck else when hormone shit is done and I lose weight. Or get me starteded with weight loss through surgery, too... god knows sstressing me the FUCK OUT ISN'T HELPING ME.

I gotta get hair removal. I want some smooth ass fucking legs and I hate shaving my face. I fucking HATE IT. I want no hair fucking anywhere but my face.

Do that shit and tell me about the hitler bullshit and the rest later. I just want to get fucking started. I WANT TO GET STARTED. FUCK.

Teased me with pictures and paintings and then just... did nothing. That's just fucking cruel to play with someone like that.

>>18168467
Aw, man. This makes me sad. I kind of feel like I've done this to somebody. I couldn't help it, I tried my best. I tried to convince myself that I could do it, and that if I couldn't do it, it was because I was too weak, and that I could grow stronger. Maybe I wasn't wrong, but I don't think I grew in time, and I really messed things up as a result. It's difficult when all it takes is a single lapse in judgement to mess everything up. Teenage hormones, and a runner's high after some intense exercise.

If you're out there, I'm sorry man. As I say, differences in experience. We might've been the same age, but by the time I'd met you, your mind had already looped around the second time. I was an idiot.

If there's one thing I learned in life, is that if you don't talk at all, no one will hate you.
Yohohohoho.

>>18167561
you already made a thread about it

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Fuck it, I have a weird vent for you /adv/.
>be me
>have bf
>extremely jealous and possessive over bf
>he knows this and it's never a big deal for him
>one morning when we wake up together he tells me he had a really nice dream
>refuses to tell me what it was about though because it'd "make me jealous"
>ask him why he even mentioned it then
"Fine, get your own burger house then."
>super confused, no idea what that means
>spend all day being kinda pissy at him for even mentioning it then if he knew how it would make me feel
>finally bring it up to him later on
>he reveals at this point that the dream was about him owning his own burger house
For some fucking reason he thought I'd be jealous about him owning a burger house IN A DREAM
I'VE NEVER EVER TALKED ABOUT COOKING BEFORE OTHER THAN TO TELL HIM I HATE IT
Now he thinks I'm acting crazy because I got mad. Am I crazy?

>>18171068
I should also mention that he made a big show about whatever it was making me jealous, which is really weird.

>>18170808
Sounds like u just need a heart to heart w/that person

>>18171070

He knew how you'd react and wound you up. You got trolled.

If he's OK with your jealousy, he's going to have fun with it from time to time. You a literally a lolcow, who can be reliably milked for lols.

>>18171082
That's what I thought too, but he isn't acting like it. Usually when people troll someone you laugh or do something to indicate it was a joke when they get mad. Them getting mad is the desired reaction, but he just acted really weirded out when I got mad, like I shouldn't have gotten mad at all and I'm crazy. I honestly would've been totally fine if he said "Oh haha bro it was just a prank" But instead he acted like I was completely insane

>>18171035
Very true, it also means that no one will trust you if your the weirdo in the corner of the room with a demented smile on your face and nothing to say.

Just started talking to a girl a month or so back, we really hit it off everything is going great and then out of nowhere she gets really standoffish and tells me she just got out of a bad relationship and just wanted to be friends. I thought that would be alright so I went along with it. Fast forward two weeks a group of our friends go dancing and we go as a couple "as friends". I had the best night of my life she was so incredible to be around I was on cloud 9 until the next day, I find out she started dating someone I know is a complete piece of shit to women not too long after she rejected me. I was and still am heartbroken. I can barely get out of bed in the morning now. I love her so much I don't know how I can go on.

>>18171126
By not hanging out with her. She basically lied about not being ready to date. Or worse, maybe she just didn't wanna date YOU.. which sucks. I guess I'd say forget her and stop being her friend. Or it'll hurt needlessly.

>>18170384
Yaassss

Why the fuck do they intentionally make school uniforms for girls so sexy? And they force you to say they aren't or to pretend you are oblivious to it or call you a creep/pervert/degenerate otherwise. I'm tired of this political correctness shit and of schools over sexualizing girls through school uniforms.

The only thing keeping me going is that I just need to know what the fuck is going on in my fucked up life.

People don't just turn 30 and learn they are the son of hitler. And then learn they are a hermaphrodite. and then learn they are the star of some fucked up truman show type bullshit. and then find out all of the world revolves around them.

jesus.

What the fuck.

Life got fucking weird.

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https://letmereach.com/2014/03/31/why-wont-the-narcissist-psychopath-leave-me-alone/

ok nice read

apparently i have to change my number for some fuckface to leave me alone. cool. i'm going back to bed. snugglin > stressin

well fuck how do we keep things casual and fun when youre making me pasteries after an awful day cuz you felt bad

Ive never had anyone do that for me, not even my own parents.

>>18171169
What does it mean that there can be only one? Is that referring to me being immortal? Referring to some kind of competition? As in, this "game" isn't going to end until all of us, the stars, are all but one dead? Have you been trying to kill me through suicide? Making my life a living hell so I would off myself? Are the others in the same boat?

How many are left? Are they all dead? Is that why you are showing yourselves to me now, because I was the one that endured?

Is this some kind of fucked up hunger game?

Or does it refer to a girl you're trying to set me up with? Like, it's down to B and M and...?

My ex wanted to stay friends (fair enough) but she practically nuked our relationship due to her own problems whilst blaming me for everything. A bit like the ending to A New Hope except our relationship was that entire planet.

Tried being a friend on-and-off for months only to be snubbed with short replies and attitude. Got the idea, got on with my life, started engaging with social media and re-hauled everything to reflect my life because that shit's important these days.

Lol now she's sucking up to me and putting effort into it after I've made it obvious that I've stopped giving a shit.

lol sorry babe

>>18169527
if only my ex girlfriend thought this.. i would be the happiest person on earth, message him anon.. what do you have to lose if you don't have contact with him anymore at the moment??

I'll graduate, it's just gonna take a bit since I'm not full time. I'm not a failure, I'm not wierd, I'm not stupid.

>>18171151
It's not really like that, she's the nicest sweetest girl you could ever know

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>>18167318
My life is the pile of shit I've earned.

>>18167379
Just go

I lost my Jury Duty summons and am freaking the fuck out.

Taco Bell was a bad idea for breakfast.

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>be me 2 months ago
>dating dude with what I surmise is actual NPD
>literally chad but with autism, not even kidding
>bc of chad status is popular and shit
>musician as well so lots of female attention
>he drops me after a month of dating, ghosts me for weeks and then asks for a break bc muh mental health :^(
>probably because i didn’t let him fug me
>WhatdidIexpect.jpg
>Let him know full and well that the conditions of the break are that for me to agree to it we are not to sleep with other people
>He dances around acknowledging what i’m saying and the conversations ends
>He is now openly flirting with some other chick on social media
>I have confronted him about it, he tells me nothing is going on
>Don’t know what to think, but still extremely wary that the possibility is high as they live in the same town and go to the same clubs
>Also have information from someone else that said girl is loose
>Angry.jpg
>Come to the realisation that in our time together he told me explicit information that could legitimately get him arrested and ruin his life if it got out
>He tells me I and one other person are the only people that know this information about him
>screenshot evidence exists of him telling me about this shit
>feels good, man

The best part is that if I do find out he’s been feeding me a load of shit regarding this other person, is that if I did decide to out this info, he doesn’t even have anything to use against me in retaliation. I was practically a doormat for him when we were together, nothing but kind and borderline mothering if i’m honest. I never sent any nudes or anything along those lines. Just a couple of foot pics because he’s a footfag. This is honestly so out of character for me to have this as a revenge backup plan but this dude is such a fucking asshole, man. Feels so fuckin good.

>>18171184
My narcissist faggot-ass bitch of an ex-husband is still fucking with my shit. He was tracking my phone so I got a new phone new phone number and he's tracking that! Found out he has my IP address but even if I changed that he installed a tracker on my mac. Narcissists are fucking evil.

Self-loathing won't get her back. Just get back to work and try to focus this time round.

>>18171888
I'd ask what his name started with but it doesn't matter, narcissist autistic fuckboys are all the same and they're a dime a dozen.

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>>18171906
Yet you all bitches still can't stop loving them, don't you?
They are narcissists for a reason.

Speaking of which, where you at? I like to know what you're up to every now and then. Don't worry I'll never try to initiate a conversation, although I'm sure that would be entertaining. No, you'll just turn to whatever fat bitch is standing next to you and ask her do do drugs in the bathroom. You're so predictable. It's getting boring.

>>18171920
I stopped loving my narcissist five years ago. My autistic fuckboy may not be a narcissist but I'll concede to your point, I still love him although I'll never talk to him again.

Finally worked up the courage to do my driver's test today so I can finally be an adult.

I failed within 20ft of starting the car.
Feelsbadman.jpg

>Captcha is picking cars

>>18171071
Believe me, I've tried. But it only got worse and worse the more I tried to work things out.

>>18171933
>contradicting herself in two sentences

Yep, woman

Need some advice, tips, or just a short talk. Made a thread about this but only got one response. I have two close online friends, and today one of them out of the blue blocked me on everything, but both our mutual friend. I've been very anxious all day. How can I calm my anxiety down from this?

>>18172041
Yep. That's my magic and mystery.

I want to learn how to be manipulative so I can smooth talk my way into getting my disability check increased.

I've just found out that I have a high chance of failing college (UK - not university) and if I do I will kill myself. There are no other decent options, as I would hate to do 2 more years of college which I would have to pay for, and the kinds of jobs you can get with only GCSEs are horrible and soul draining. I don't enjoy anything anymore so everything hinges on passing my course, if I do I will go to uni and probably end up in the same situation again anyway. I don't understand why I even bother with anything anymore.

Idk what ur playing at by messaging every few weeks saying u miss me when u have a bf, but I don't care for you anymore and you are a slut despite your petty sob stories

Why do guys always pick other girls over me? What is it that I'm doing wrong?

I'll probably make a move the next time I see her. Fuck knows what I'm actually going to do though.

I jerked off to the thought of sucking off a trap, kill me

you speak like someone who has never been smacked in the fuckin mouth.

Sometimes I hate you for your depression and the way that you make me feel about myself.

Sometimes I still think about her.

I hate my boyfriend because he has a porn habit he can't break. He's so disgusting and weak. I stay out of pity but all I can think of is how weak and retarded he is for crumbling to porn then crying about it. I even want to cheat on him to show him what a disgusting pathetic shit he is for letting porn get the better of what we can have. His dick is limp and he has no drive. I want to vomit just thinking about it.

I hope you come back. You're the only person I care about.

I want to get a septum although I look like a 17 years old (I have 19 years). I'm afraid that I would look bad or to "not be like a badass to have one".

Also, I've been hanging around a lot with a friend and his GF, they have one and they encourage me to get it, I've been thinking if my others friend would think that I want to copy them or some bullshit like that.

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Just make up your mind already. That 'friend' treats you like shit, lives on the other side of the continent, and doesn't even have any romantic intent; that's literally what you keep telling me.

Your family tells you to drop him. I tell you to drop him. Hell, you told me several times yourself that you've dropped him. A few days later you're back to texting him, calling him, visiting him even though you've promised us all that you're definitely not going back there?

I love you, I still do. But I can't trust you like this. Your boyfriend is a sucker who'd do anything to make you happy, but playing second fiddle for a 'friend' like this just draws the line.

>>18172722
never. you made sure to blow that.

Why must you always behave like such an Ignorant bitch all the time? All I want to do is love you and help you and grow along side you but it's like you absolutely must find something stupid to argue and bitch about. I hate that you never change. I hate that you never learn anything. I hate that you are such a huge fizzle and i hate that you lie so much. WHY ARE YOU SO HARD TO LOVE.

Left my GF for her friend, left her to come back to GF, GF dumps me and starts fucking a guy I see everyday. Wants to keep me as a friend...

>>18169137
Don't you fucking do it anon

>>18172744
Now that's some karma right there

>>18172752
Dude tell me about it. She just found out about her friend and I about a week ago. The friend and I only dated about a month, but no forgiveness from GF for dating a best friend. Feel empty inside and joined Tinder where I'm even more disliked.

I don't think I want to be alive anymore.

I currently am and always was the bad guy, I've only recently let myself believe it after years of lies and personal deception.

I only like to role play the good guy but always avoid the serious things that only someone who is naturally good could do.

It makes sense why i've been so depressed all my life because i've been living this eternal lie.

But i can't change and i don't think i could even if i wanted to.

And then it hits me that we're all bad guys and it makes me sick to my core.

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I've listened to "Flex Like David Icke" so much that I start chuckling when I hear someone say "6 million Jews" and it's wholly inappropriate. Not even a /pol/lack either.

>>18172874
How often do you hear someone say 6 million Jews that this will really be a problem?

>>18172880
In my WWII History class.

I tried going to psychologist / eap at work

the guy just wanted me to fucking focus on the most tragic shit in my life and i just cant think about that shit

i hate ignoring all my tradgedies but fuck just artificially forcing myself to talk about them with some asshole i dont know

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You're responsible for these antidepressants. And my alcohol consumption. It's okay. Everyone knows you're a piece of shit. Your happiness is an illusion. Your confidence is an illusion. And they'll soon realize it. If the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, then I can predict that your life is worthless. You will fail at all you try to accomplish. You're already failing. You try so hard to be someone perfect, when you're riddled with flaws. I always saw them. You were never perfect. You were always in progress. But It's okay. You're so far from reality that you'll never taste it. It's such a shame that someone with such a pretty face can have such an ugly heart. Make all the excuses you want. Life will make you her bitch. I wish I could stay and watch, but I have things to do.

I have $1300 saved up to move, but just realized $120 of it will be needed for a car payment, so now I'm down to $1180. There's no way I'll be able to afford first month's rent, a security deposit, an application fee, and an admin fee. What the fuck even is an admin fee? I really don't want to have to get some temp food service job, I've worked enough of those. Just hire me and let me work on computers dammit.

R

so I changed my ISP yet again and here we fucking are why can't you just take the hint?

why should I give up something I have enjoyed for years because of you?

stop being selfish and get on with your life.

S

>>18172742
You sound like such a lovable person, she will be much better with somebody else, you asshole

>>18167835
what?
i'm guess you think a skin patch is cancer?
don't assume anything without a diagnosis lol

>>18172902
the fact that you "can't think about that shit" is very likely the problem
it's only "artificially forcing yourself to talk about it" if you make it that way

>download game/album
>play it for five minutes
>turn it off
Why do I keep doing this? I always expect to enjoy it, and I'm always let down.

You're such a fucking hypocrite and liar. I don't need your love and validation, or anybody elses. Fuck you

>>18173048

Same problem mate.

It's just not enjoyable anymore.
It's either a grindfest, a repeat of a repeat of the same re-hashed ideas or some SJW bollocks.

I fear I've outgrown the one thing that actually made me happy, escapism via vidya. I can barely play anymore, even games I used to enjoy.

I've been running and working out, going to bed on time and getting my full eight hours, as well as making breakfast every morning and eating plenty of vegetables. I feel like garbage anyways. Fuck life, I wish my parents had aborted me.

I'm in love with a girl but our conversations don't ever last long enough to get anything meaningful started so I've only been able to use surface level conversation. I can tell she's getting bored of me but I don't really know how to step it up when she gives me less and less of her time each time I try to get a conversation rolling

I just tried to kill myself 25 minutes ago but couldn't do it.

I have friends, a girlfriend, a wonderful family, money, and opportunities but i still feel empty. I could make a thread about it but I dont want to delve into it for my own sake.

>>18173139
>>18172768
>>18170125
Don't do it

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i wanna fuck ******** so badly i wanna fuck her throat sore and have her look up at me with those big, glossy, teary-eyed eyes and caress her face and comfort her in my arms and kiss her often

I'm getting closer to fucking an escort. I have the money for a decent looking one but I admit it would hurt my ego even though I haven't picked up a girl on my own in years.

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>>18173179
yay escorts!

There's nothing in this world to live for. I want to die(I wish I could kill myself)

had a long conversation with bf about suicidal thoughts.
I'm obsessed with the idea of ending my life and at this point there isn't much hope left for me. he gave me lots of great advice for dealing with depression but I'm too far gone. he was going to stay the night but I guess I bummed him out too much because he left and went home. it is probably best he doesn't have this sort of stress in his life.
I've been doing a lot of research on nitrogen gas and it seems like the way to go.. I just don't know whether I should give my cat to someone else before I decide to follow through with it. she is very anxious and probably won't do well seeing her human die and all, plus I wouldn't want her to somehow be affected by the gas or be left alone for too long without proper care. if i randomly decided to drop her off with bf he would know something is up and he's the only person I trust to take care of her.
not sure how to go about this but I suppose I still have time to decide. any day is a good day to die lmao. I am in no real rush.

>>18171427
The point is that if I DO go they are just going to lie to me. You faggots know this.

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Thank god your old number is out of function.
I tried to call you today after two fucking years, after dreaming 3 nights about you.

I have to fucking hold myself away.

I really only want: a white girl; not obese; preferably buxom, with potential for a nice butt and waist; intelligent (self-aware, etc.); and holds similar views and interests.

I may as well as for a fucking unicorn. With two horns (a bicorn? Duocorn?)

Worse, I HAD a girlfriend like that who broke up with me since I wasn't novel anymore. Plus, she was blonde (which is a preference). Fucking kill me now, I'm afraid no other girls like this will be interested in me, let alone date me. All I seem to find are Asians and Mexicans, all obese or bordering on it. Maybe I'll just fucking date a few of them, and then just, stay a bachelor (but not in the same vein as that MGTOW garbage). I know what I want, and, apparently, want the diamond in the rough a second time.

I really need to get back to the gym. I think I'll go tomorrow and perhaps Friday, then back to M/W/F again like it was.

I'm 24 and a physics major, a year left on my B. Sci, hopefully right into a Master's program focusing on computational modeling (being the one to simulate black holes, fluid flows, anything). This means I'll be ~27 when I'm finally "ready" for the job market. Most women, I'm afraid, will already be married and/or have kids if I haven't found someone by then.

Fuck, I know it's a case of "the grass is always greener", but seriously, it at least seems easier for women, at this age.

>>18169537
Not that anon. But need to say this. I want to die but I can't kill myself, cause I'm last living child of my parents (my little brother died about 7 years ago, he was only 10yo) if I kill myself It'll be extremely painful for them(my mother would most certainly commit suicide and father will be left alone) I don't want that

I think of you every single year on the 12th of April.

I live a life where I am not allowed to live independently but I'm able to depend on anyone else. I have people's needs constantly pushed in my face as soon as I start to take care of my needs. Taking care of myself without anyone's assistance is hard enough but to have other people's wants and needs piled on top of that. Then told that I should just be able to handle it all without an ounce of advice to go with it.