What are males supposed to do?

I was a fucking nerd during my late teens, by the time I got to be 25 I learned that women are pretty good at noticing desperation.

The best way to start dating is to speak to as many women as it's possible without any sort of romantic meaning. Eventually you start hanging out with people in your close circle and that some times leads to attraction if you can carry yourself in social situations.

>>18138080

This. Contrary to how it seems, not all girls are literally drowning in attraction from the opposite sex. If you're not going for a bitch, just talking to her regularly will probably stir up some interest.

>>18138069

It's really not about things. Most of the guys i dated were upper middle class and because of that they acted like spoiled man-children.
In the end i chose a poorfag 22 yr old virgin neet why? because he put me first. He knew how to take care of his own basic needs. He can cook and clean, so we share that responsibility instead of him expecting me to be like his mommy.
He has really good hygiene and a sense of responsibility.
He was only neet because he had put off his own life to stay home and take care of a special needs family member.
This is the only man I've ever wanted to marry. Idk if that helps but i hope it does.

>>18138117
You are an exception desu.

>>18138069
Im almost 28 and I still haven't figured it out. I've never been with a woman I found actually attractive. They've always been low hanging fruit. Sort of like me I guess.

Conventional courtship and dating makes no fucking sense to me, my man. You should probably try going to edating route. Don't be like me though and just sit around waiting for it to happen. It won't.

>>18138120

I'm really not, there's alot of women like me.
If you go to the big cities where women are swimming in offers alot of them are extremely material and superficial but there are plenty of women in quiet corners and rural places with simple desires for a loving and loyal husband that will treat her with respect.

There's plenty of both types, you just don't find them in the same places.
Obviously everyone wants to succeed in life but it takes time to get there. If you can fulfill a womans emotional needs first, the rest will follow because a satisfied woman will lift your spirits and make you strive to achieve your goals too.

Most women just really want to be taken care of. The whole concept of the working woman ruined the natural dynamic. The next best thing is a balanced household so shes not overwhelmed trying to work and still care for the home/potential future children.

>>18138069
Look at men you find attractive and ask yourself what it is about them that makes you think that. Maybe it's that they look well groomed, maybe they have an athletic body, smell nice. Aspire to what you find attractive in a male. Then you have the appearance part down. There's a lot of other stuff that makes a man attractive in womens eyes, but you're probably not here to hear about that.

Then talk to women. I practice that stuff with female friends, or collesgues because there's no pressure. You don't have to come up with pickup lines or other stuff to impress them. Just talk to them like normal people and show interest. Some women will like you, some won't it's easy to notice

>>18138157
I think there's always a fear that with the years she might change her goals and becomes more superficial as she sees herself getting older and "running out of time" to enjoy things. Women in my family have this pattern.

>>18138201

Fair enough but men do this too. i think everyone is a little afraid of decreasing potentials as we age

>>18138265
That's a cop out.

>>18138069
I'm not doing anything. Ive been around the block a few times and women really are good for nothing but children. Do what your ancestors did- be awesome, then buy someone to bear your kids

>>18138265
>i think everyone is a little afraid of decreasing potentials as we age
lmao men only start to decrease late 60's

>>18138069

trick the woman into seeking your validation.

impressing women is a mistake. withhold your approval and praise and make them work for it.

they want to work hard for a man who is hard to please. 70%+ anyway

>>18138069
>what the heck do women want from men?
mainly money, attention, and emotional support

Don't act desperate
Don't jump straight to "lets date/ you're beautiful/ whatever"
Don't just just throw a million lines into the creek and hope you hook any old fish.

Femanon here;
Yeah, I get a decent amount of attention from the opposite sex but I literally couldn't care less about the people that just throw "hey sexy wanna fuck" or "we should go on a date" out there as the first thing they say to me.

My boyfriend is shy, nerdy and and a heavy set guy but I love him and think he's the most beautiful guy I've ever seen. Why? Because he treats me like a person, talks to me, jokes with me and treats me really nice. We built an amazing relationship from a friendship and he's my pride and joy now.
Even when we first met, we would just text back and forth and talk about our interests and stuff, hell when we first met he thought I was gay and didn't have a chance anyways but still wanted to build a friendship with me.

Basically what I'm saying; build a connection with a girl without making it look like you're just trying to get a girlfriend.
Find someone you find interesting; share your interests and build chemistry.
Eventually it will blossom into a relationship and you'll have a mutual appreciation for each other; not just a "well she said yes to a date so I went for it" type relationship, there's no substance there.

>>18138069

Get a life. Get a job, study something, get some hobbies.

You will

A) Meet people and

B) Have things going on in your life, so you won't be so desperate for attention.


Only then you will have a real shot at this.

>>18138120
That's the point tho - serious relationships are all about looking for the exception. The vast majority of people in the world (either male or female, don't matter) are utterly incompatible with you, whoever you are. At most you can hold a superficial conversation with them or fuck them if there is physical attraction, but nothing more. The few who are left have more in common with you, they could be your buddies or even friends. And among those there will be the exceptions, whose personalities align with yours enough for a long-term relationship.

OP: if you just want to get laid, use Tinder, go to bars or pay a professional. Otherwise, make it clear to yourself who you are and what kind of a woman you want. It's stupid and pointless to think in terms of "women are/do/want X" - you're not looking for a generic woman. Think about what your ideal would expect from you, what she would do, which places would she frequent. Then act accordingly.

OP here, my other issue is the extreme lack of options for meeting women. I will admit, I am super fucking desperate. But how can I not be?

>>18138393
>But how can I not be?

By having other shit in your life? You don't NEED to date, dude.

>>18138298
This right here, never ever chase women, that's teenage shit.

What most boys get taught is that women want to be courted like in the romantic movies, have acts of devotion before even getting together, endless "respect" that amounts to putting them on a pedestal and acting like timid pushovers. This doesn't work.

What they then sometimes turn to is the opposite: trying to be a manipulative asshole who puts women down so hopefully they cling to him because of an unhealthy psychological dynamic.

What women really want is someone who has both healthy self esteem and respect for her, who doesn't correlate building her up or calling her out on something to his own confidence. Someone who sees her for the person she is, who can push her to better herself and love her for her personal little quirks/flaws at the same time.
Someone she can have good conversations with, is on the same wavelength with when it comes to the future, a partner interested in a love relationship where you both look after and support each other.
Someone who sincerely admires her for who she is and lets her feel she is loved, but doesn't "respect" her too much to give her honest feedback or tough love when necessary. A man who pays attention to his own boundaries and desires and isn't afraid to communicate what he will and won't accept and expect of her. Who will want to please her but from a place of self respect, not being a doormat who forgets about himself in order to be her servant.

You attract women by enjoying your own life and being someone who easily connect with people (which you learn best through lots of practice). Obviously you might need to put in extra effort to meet women if you naturally don't run into them. But apart from that, it's not different than what gets you a job or makes people want to befriend you. Be confident and friendly, be well-groomed, be a positive presence to be around (overall), show off your humor or little insights.

>>18138298
How is this even possible? A woman would just turn to another man. Why would she put effort into you when some other dude would willingly throw himself to her?

>>18138409
The dude who would throw himself at her is considered boring and I doubt he could get her off.

>>18138403
This.

If you forget about finding love and focus on improving your life and your self, then love will happen on its own. People who are desperate for a partner will take anyone, regardless of compatibility. And as nice as being in a relationship is, it will not magically fix any personal or life problems that you have. Something that holds you back now will still hold you back in a relationship.

Make your own happiness. When you're happy with yourself and your life, not only will you be a more attractive partner, you will be able to find someone who actually matches you, instead of clinging to the first person who smiles at you.

>>18138420
I understand what you say but I just have no idea how to reach that point. Anytime someone says "get some hobbies" I just draw blanks. My current hobbies are male dominated or infested with semi weirdos(dungeons and dragons).

I want to get new ones and that's something I can work on. I am sort of happy with my life. The major part i am unhappy with is my personal life.

Not having had a relationship at all really eats at me and makes me feel fundamentally not human.

I imagine people take me less serious when they find out I have never had a woman or anything.

They may not say it or show it but I can see their disdain.

>>18138284
That's why men have mid life crisis at 40-50, and dump wife/kids to fuck a 20 year old whore with daddy issues.

>>18138284
Keep telling yourself this. You are deluded if you think that cute young women are lining up to date a man in his sixties.

>>18138469
Women are the ones with mid life crises now.

>>18138476
Everyone has mid life crisis, it's normal. It is not a gendered thing.

My mom is aging beautifully and enjoying herself, and my dad keeps buying motorcycles and spends 8 hours a day in Facebook. I'm sure someone else witnessed the contrary.

>>18138435
So what is it you want? Stop being a virgin? Tick off the "had at least one gf" box? A decoration to show off at parties? A future wife? Proper advice depends on your answer to this. Stop caring too much about what other people think. 23 is nothing, when you turn 35 you can start worrying.

Did you try online dating? Also, my last dnd group had plenty of women. They weren't normies, sure, but that's a good thing.

>>18138284
What is this dumb bullshit about men gaining value in their 30s and 40s?

If you are a fat piece of shit autist in your 20s, you're not magically gonna turn into Sean Connery in your 40s.

>>18138494
>23 is nothing, when you turn 35 you can start worrying

25 not 35 is when you should start worrying. 35 years without feminine attention and/or sex is a lotta years.

>>18138500
It has a core of truth in that men are allowed to look much older before not being seen as traditionally hot/handsome anymore. And that for men their financial/professional position is more directly tied in with raw sex appeal, and a man is more likely to be on top of that at an older age.

But this site just really clings to the idea that when they turn thirty or thirty five suddenly they will become irresistible to younger girls because they hope to be compensated for being awkward in youth. Sure there's girls who think an older guy is interesting by itself but most who "looove" older men are picturing indeed Sean Connery/George Clooney, and not your average middle aged men with a pouch and balding head. Youth and tight, elastic skin are hot by themselves.

>>18138435

Last week I had a poker night with people from my roleplaying group. Half the people there were girls.

Last month it was a boardgame night, and there were girls. I admit my roleplaying groups themselves don't have many girls,but come on, that's not an excuse.

>>18138338
That sounds wonderful, but the stories about friendzone don't come from a vacuum.
> we should just stay friends anon
> you're so cute, I hope you find someone one day

>>18138553
Friends become lovers all the time. The strongest relationships I know started as friendships, and they thrive because of the foundation the friendship laid.

But good friends does not automatically equal good lovers. If this happens, it's not because you were friends, it's because you were romantically incompatible. It sucks, and it hurts. But having a friendship is not some bullet that kills any romantic chance you had with each other.

>>18138420
>focus on improving your life and your self, then love will happen on its own
I've been doing that for the last 12 years. When does the love happen?

>>18138585
You also have to make yourself available (socially) in order to allow opportunities to arise. Have you done this?

>>18138338
damn you're really using this beta cuck pretty hard
nice job anonette, you hooked him pretty well

>>18138608
I do have friends, but they're all guys. None of us like bars, so we don't do things like that.

>>18138608
Then that means that love doesn't happen on its own.

>>18138617
She probably has a Chad on the side. The gfs of betas always do

>>18138657
Are you replying to yourself?

>>18138652
I did miss that point, and fair enough. You do have to meet women. However, that doesn't disprove the idea that not pursing any relationship whatsoever allows love to form naturally with someone you are actually compatible with.

>>18138662
No I'm another guy

>>18138500
It's a meme

It mostly comes from your beta ability and faimily supporting value growing as you tend to get established with money and career by that time.

It's basically western version of the 72 virgins to fool chumps.

>just keep working goy your value will increase

>I have no idea what I am supposed to do to attract women.
Look strong, act calm, have status. Height works to your advantage but you can't change it.

>No one fucking tells you anything or how to date properly.
Life is a competitive game, a game with no real alliances.

>How can I compete with dudes who have all this dating capital?
Amass your own, then hit the road. Don't bother looking for true love in a university or big city.

I wonder what I can do with my favorite hobby.

nobody ever told me anything about how to date and I've done just fine. if you're 23 and this clueless it's probably because you're a piece of shit nobody likes.

Hit the gym

>>18138069
Just lie to girls.
I hate these bitches enough to do it with confidence and they believe me.