My birthday was a couple days ago and my husband did nothing

>>18134322

lol.

>>18134322

give him anal

>>18134327
To be honest I do not want to have sex with someone who has stopped caring about me. Sex to me is something special towards two people who love each other. It feels like he is just keeping me around and I am trying everything to make him happy but no matter what I do it is not good enough for him and he ends up not even saying thank you or being kind to me. He is always taking his anger out on me and belittling me infront of his family. Last week I ended up crying at his parents house because of it. To be honest I am a bit obscure in my personality but I am attractive my husband is more normal and I think what he use to find qurky and cute about me are now annoying compared to normal people.

Don't post on 4chan about it, you need to talk to him and say how you are feeling

inb4 I have

No you haven't, try again.

>>18134342
I thought I come here to help come up with ideas how to properly address how I feel without pushing him further away from me. I am not very good at talking to people. I have tried and even asked him if he was depressed but I do not think I worded it properly or he was just ignoring as I spoke.

>>18134322
*hug* go shopping by yourself? thrift stores are nice.

>>18134341

>I do not want to have sex

there's your fucking problem. you arent taking care of your mans REAL needs. zeldas and pokemons arent a substitute for a devoted wife who gives her man what he wants. grow the fuck up.

>>18134322
He sees you as his mommy who takes care of him and gets him nice things, not as a woman he loves. Be more distant and stop doing nice shit for him to make him come crawling back.

Did he used to do shit like you were expecting before you were married? Or are you expecting him to be someone he never was because you're now married?

>>18134349
Thank you Anon I do not care for shopping but I thought of buying myself a gift for my birthday. I am just really embarassed because his sister even asked what we did for my birthday and it was very hard to answer.

>>18134341
Divorce him. He obviously does not care about your feelings and this is not a healthy relationship.

>>18134363
It's a good thing you did, if you told the truth. She might put a few words in his head, about behaving like a crappy husband and how to change it.

>>18134356
I have tried Anon he stopped wanting to when his work became more stressful so up until my birthday I was giving him blow jobs but now I just feel gross with myself.

>>18134357
I am worried this may make him more distant though.

>>18134359
He use to take me out for my birthday every year to my favourite place we have been together for five years this is my first birthday since we have been married and the first time he did something like this. Since we have been married he been very distant.

>>18134371
I was upfront and she did tell him he should do something for me. I think it only felt like she was nagging him though.

Its very hard for me to do anything with him now the things we use to like to do together he no longer wants to do with me. So I do the things he likes to do but that only makes him angry with me.

>>18134373
In that case he needs some real talk. Confront him about his distant attitude and tell him that a marriage can't survive by coasting through it. He needs to put some effort in again or he'll lose you. Then tell him you'd like marriage counseling because you want to make it work and you hope he still does too.

>>18134373

buy some lingerie, put on some make-up, have a meal cooked for him when he gets home with a beer at the ready and wait for him to tell you when he needs something from you.

his job is stressful and he doesn't need your mopey bullshit. be a silent supporter.

>>18134384
Anon I have spent over $500 dollars on lingerie the past year I try to create weekly fun things for him and I already make him all his meals. I own my own bussiness that does well my job is very stressful as well but I do not take it out on him. I am always bending over backwards for him its become more stressful than work because he will just give a negative reponse or get annoyed with me. Even cleaning the house makes him angry with me he gets mad at me for everything I do it is tiring. I am just very frustrated and are always putting his needs before my own in hopes he will act like he did before we got married. I have no clue why the sudden change happened maybe because he knows its harder for me to leave? I do not know it is just very annoying.

>>18134380
I am not sure if this would work and I am afraid to know if he does not care that if I stay.

>>18134393

$500 is what, 1.5 pieces of actual decent lingerie? if you really do own a successful business, $500 is a fucking pittance. no wonder your man doesnt love you.

stop projecting your own insecurities on him. if youre making him angry then youre sure as shit not making him happy. tell him you exist to serve him and that youll do anything he asks. anything less is simply unacceptable. you do want this to work, right?

>>18134399
There's no magical solution that will fix everything without confrontation. If he doesn't want the marriage to work, you need to get a divorce. Divorces are not sad. Bad marriages that continue too long are sad.

>>18134405
If I wanted that I would of signed up for BDSM relationship. I have no desire for a relationship where I am just a sex toy.

>>18134384
Ew

>>18134413
Just stop responding to him, he's an obvious troll.

>>18134413

then go ahead and get the divorce, failure

Please ignore the /pol/ cunt telling you you're his property.

>>18134405
I am not really sure how to properly confront him Ive bern trying all week but he just responds saying "is what I do not goid enough for you?" which makes me seem like I am the bad guy and I have no clue to reapond to because it makes it seem like no matter what I say that I am trying to personally attack him rather than try to polietly tell him how I feel.

>>18134424
been*

>>18134424
Sounds like you're a doormat and he knows it, and he's using that fact to avoid talking. Be firm, and tell him that no, it's not good enough.

>>18134420

fuck off, legbeard

>>18134424

he asked you a question. if you cant answer it honestly, why do you expect the relationship to work? if you feel like what he does isnt good enough, why dont you tell him? why are you lying to your husband? does he really deserve that from you?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rhn0pgbfzf4

>>18134327
Yea but if you do then with a strap on.

Seriously though, if you want him to change i'd advise you to take control, show him you wear the pants in your relationship now.
Not sure if you have realized but usually in a marriage over time the woman will increasingly have more say than the man while it was different in the beginning.
If you can't make him love you by romantic means you can still bring in this dynamic and chances are he will show more interest, could be that he is a complete numb nut and is not even phazed by such a change.

I'd advise you to search for a new candle if the old one has burned out.

>>18134424
stop,he's just a troll >>18134405

you've become a doormat. by only trying to please him all the time, you just made it his new normal. distance yourself, not by being cold to him or hostile, but just by taking care of yourself and having other interest than him. he may change his way.
if not, talk to him about his behaviour, confront him if he's not listening, ask to seek couple counseling.put your pants on god dammit! and if after all that he doesnt want to change... you gotta leave him and move on. i know it sucks to say but as of right now youre obviously unhappy. is this how you want to live the rest of YOUR life?

Okay, first off - he does not sound mature enough to be married. Unless this was like an ironic gift that you got him because "haha I liked this as a kid now it's sentimental as an adult" then he really should be mature enoigh to have other interests. I would feel like a fucking child if my wife ever bought me pokemon cards.

Secondly, you don't aound mature enough just yet to be in a married relationship. If you actually tolerate an adult who wants shit like this, then clearly that's what you think you deserve: a selfish man child. If you were mature enough, you would have walked away when he showed signs of being this selfish and childish. This wasn't overnight.

Thirdly, how much do you weigh? How much does he weigh? Having these interests, being this socially unaware, I'm willing to bet both of you are sloppy and overweight. Fat people jjst have no fucking clue about themselves personally, so of course they don't know what they are outwardly doing to others, or why what's certain things within their control are happening to them. That oblivious attitude is why they got fat.

Have more awarness OP.

>>18134378
Hmm.. try doing the things you like to do then? Like, I dunno, shopping, walking through the mall or whatever it is calms you down.

I always read about how women like a man who is a "challenge". No surprise women end up in abusive relationships because of this very thinking. But a part of me feels it works both ways, and men start questioning themselves and how badly they're doing when a woman distances herself to cool off, shop, do girly things, nails, hair, etc. Shopping is relaxing for women I hear.

Women like it when men make themselves rare. Well, try making YOURSELF rare, and do stuff you like. Make him wonder. If he starts behaving like you'll always be around, be you. Make yourself attractive to yourself, it'll lift your spirit a bit.

Nothing harmful, just a little you time. Your life seems very stressful. Just try to disconnect now and then.

Thrift stores. I see girls going crazy shopping there all the time.

Don't want you to end up singing "Little big town - better man" down the road. I would hate myself becoming that kind of man, and even fear it.. I'd probahly start taking antidepressants so as not to hurt my wife in any way, don't wanna grow bitter, God forbid.