Say it, get it off your chest.

The only thing that brings me comfort is formulating my suicide plan.

Gonna go buy the rope on Monday.

Been through several therapists and medications/lifestyle changes/moves around but it all leads back to me feeling like garbage.

My mental illness has only gotten worse.

Also realizing my family consists of delusional, terrible addicts has made me feel less guilt about my plans.

I only feel bad for leaving my little half brother behind but his aunt is raising him well and he seems happy. We barely speak anyway.

i want to die
i want to be a child again

my man's baby mama is a petty shitty human and if she didn't get knocked up and bear two beautiful little humans who would miss her, i'd really like to hit her with a car.

we were together for a year and starting to move in when she decided i'm not allowed near the kids (they love me, they share their snacks with me) and has been threatening to take them away from their dad because of it. he's loving and devoted and an excellent father. i'm not a person who would spend another minute with someone who showed himself to be a shitty parent.. i'm here to fold their little clothes and help with homework because dad isn't good at math. i don't understand why a person who's never spoken to me wants to fuck with my life but i'll probably just wait out the decade til the kids are 18, continue taking care of the kind and faithful man she left and knock her oversized teeth out of her god damned mouth.

i need a beer.

Why are men so insistent? You tell them no, and they argue, and argue, and argue. And they blame you for everything. I'm so tired of this

Yeah it's a little weird that you married my friend, when years ago I had the potential to be your wife. And I've come to terms with it I thought. But when I saw that cute little puppy of yours somehow it sent me spiraling into a rage. You should've bought that puppy for me. I know this is literally psychotic to think, so that's why I need to get it off my chest.

My life is a slog
I'm an adult but I hardly feel like a high school freshman
I have no social experience and very few real friends
I don't think anyone has ever loved me.

I'm really tall. Today I met a suuuper tall guy. For the first time I feel small. I had to stand on tiptoes to greet him. Felt nice. Hope he's single

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I want to scream irl but would most likely be sent to hospital. The pain is unbearable often and I've nobody to share it with who understands anymore.

Hey pick up your phone

>>18133959
no i blocked your number

Everyday I think about the thought of what would happen if I killed myself. Never really want to actually kill myself, but I think about what would happen in life if I stopped living. Like what would my mom do? She'd mourn but would she move on eventually, I would hope. I dunno, I just wanna see life just go on without me sometimes, shit's kinda interesting to see how insignificant you are in the grand scheme of things, but how you can matter so much to other people who are insignificant as well, kinda makes it significant in that regard.

I miss the 90's and my childhood. I long for the days when my biggest worry was missing Dexter's Laboratory on Wednesday nights.

I'd pay any amount of money to just live in 1998-99 again for the rest of my life.

>>18134132
I think about this a lot, too.

There's 2 certain people that I want to make sure are aware I'm dead, and make sure they know that they are in fact the reason I take depression medication.

I want them to feel FUCKING HORRIBLE about what they turned every fucking day of my life into.

FUCK YOU.

You had no problem inviting me to your apartment, sucking my goddamn cock on the bed you slept on with your "fiance," and now that you're married you literally tell people you don't know me and pretend we've never met? And block me from all forms of online communication without so much as a "fuck you"?

You told me one night that he hits you sometimes when you argue. I felt bad for you.

Well, you know what? I saw him last month. He got fucking fat. If you're this much of a bitch to him as you have been to me without even talking to me, he probably still fucking hits you.

Every time I go to sleep I imagine a million different ways to kill my self. all of them are ways for no one to ever find my body. My mind is always trying to find reasons that everyone hates me. I dont know why but I'm trying to get past this.

>>18134218

lol what? you think it would be smart for her to associate the person she is committing adultery with? just be glad you got your dick sucked, dude. stop fucking around with married women.

I hate how I have to feel so guilty after eating anything.
How I have panic attacks about 15 minutes after eating and I want to just go throw it all up, but I never can no matter what method I try.
I hate that every time I visit my parents I overeat, because if I don't they give me these strange looks.
I'm pretty sure they know, they just don't have the evidence. I'd rather be dead than fat though. Being fat is being dead to the world already anyway.

>>18134234
She wasn't married at the time.

>>18134239

she was engaged... jfc. homewreckers arent supposed to get so butthurt. you got your nut, what else do you want? a fucking 3-way?

you called last night but now i only see your calls if i go into call logs
why do you keep doing this? why do you keep calling? it's so fucking annoying yet i guess it's feeding that shitty ego of mine.

it's conflicting feelings. 99% of me is angry that you won't take the hint to leave me alone (but i'm clearly not alone in that considering the thousands of screenshots of similar sitas i've seen in the past months)

and the other 1% is like 'yeah keep trying i know my puss was that bomb totally' even if i don't really believe or understand
like i'm actually a wretched human being who's really bad at being alive. i should have been dead before my 21st birthday i'm sure but somehow i'm here, 6 years better, and i should sure as fuck know better than this but clearly i fucking don't and i'm so sick of my own shit, i just want everything to magically clean itself overnight fuck this shit

Tomorrow is my birthday. I wish I was spending it with my love instead of with them (even though they're lovely good people). I'll have to fake being happy.

i feel kinda horrible for it but i'm probably gonna buy a binder so guys will stop creeping on me in public places. i'm sick of the attention and have been since it started back with the guy who literally tried to fucking buy me

>>18134274
meanwhile I'd literally kill to have any dude so much as look at me twice.
I wish I were fucking hot.

I have a master's degree in sleeping

>>18134282

post a pic of your tits & ill jerk off to 'em

>>18134289
I'm fat. You'd scream godzilla and run away probably.

Besides, internet dudes don't count. On anon no dude is afraid of jerking off for the lulz to some uggo. Real world dudes wouldn't damage their rep on girls like me. If their buddies found out they checked out the ugly chick theyd never hear the end of it/

>>18134296

its not about your body tbqh. i get off on the idea of you sitting in front of your computer and shamefully taking a picture of yourself on the off-chance that you might get a small amount of validation from a stranger on the internet.

like, it would have to be a real struggle for you. i want you to feel, in the moment, that its a bad idea but to for some reason do it anyway. like you are legit that desperate for human attention. sexy af

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>>18134319
>The exact reason I camwhore on soc every now and then.

>>18133674
Dont do it anon. Life fucking sucks but you just gotta find your place and it gets a lot better. You can do it.

>>18134337

haha. its good to be a rich white man

>>18134361
Shit I do it for free. Literally because I am so desperate for any form of male affection or compliments that I'll take the fake ones I get from dudes jerking it on 4chins

>>18134369

>I am so desperate for any form of male affection

prove it

>>18134379
it's a blue board mate.

Besides, I get my fill of fake compliments every now and then.
Now I just want the real things. I want a real dude to actually want to jizz on my tits, in real life. Not just faceless anons on 4chins saying they want to.

>>18134392

>implying you cant post a SFW picture of yourself

did i fucking stutter?

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I'm covered in bed bug bites, I failed my physical fitness test cause I didn't have enough salt in my system, I haven't even attempted to send the email, I progressed absolutely nowhere on my senior project, too embarrassed by bed bug bites to swim/wear a tshirt, haven't hung with any friends. Famalam I hope this life thing is worth it cause it sucks this week

>>18134395
>Implying I have any sfw pics that don't have face or face that can easily be cropped out

>>18134402

>implying i give a shit about protecting your anonymity

give me a cleavage shot or gtfo

I fucking hate working with women, they are utter pieces of lying shit.

I've been working in an office 4 years and they don't do any work, all they do is strain to listen to everything you say to get some political dirt they can use against you. I've never worked with such lazy evil fuckers.

I just dealt with a full day of a supervisor and other female worker making up lying dishonest bullshit about me trying to make me look bad to everyone. I had an interview with another office, but I already know my manipulate fuck of a sup is going to lie about my work performance to keep me as a work slave doing her work for her while she's on perpetual vacation.

>>18134409
eh I could. But I want a dude in my bed with me, right now.
Posting tit pics on 4chan ain't gonna get me that. I've had my fill of the fake internet shit. Next time I get desperate enough though, find me in soc.

I would do anything to get you to admit that some part of you loves me. You wouldn't be wasting your time putting so much effort into me if you didn't, and you know it. I don't care if you say it and then immediately clam back up. I just need to know.

>>18134422

bitch

I want everything to work out for once. I keep taking a step forward and then get pushed back. It's exhausting.

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>>18134436

I feel like my mind is tryna lead me somewhere cause I keep getting the Chad experience in my dreams with like pool parties complete with DJs, going hot chick to hot chick dancing and getting it on with them.

>>18134440
different anon, how about letting a femanon validate you this time? I'll give you all the attention you want bb

I just started having a lot of soul crushing, meaning less NSA sex with randoms and friends because I know I'll never actually be loved by anyone.

I don't even like sex. I actually kind of hate it, it hurts and is anything but pleasurable. I just hate being alone more.

>>18134449

who the fuck cares about female validation

Lost so much in 3 months.
Still shook about being kicked out where I was staying.
I miss my old life. I'd take the emotional abuse back any day for my independence again. It goes without saying that being here has taught me so much. I'm probably going to kms soon considering I have nothing left to lose and I'm hours away from my close friends. Wishing I could disappear into the stars.

I feel like total shit. Every day I go home straight after work and every weekend I stay in alone and never do anything. As it's St Patrick's Day I thought I'd reach out to the handful of friends I have left after uni but got shot down by every single one. I had plans with one co-worker who quickly found a better offer and bailed.

So instead I'm currently walking to a bar where I will have a drink alone. I'll either find some new friends or very worst case scenario I'll have one drink alone and leave, and at least go home feeling a little better I tried to attempt to make new friends.

H,

I texted your cousin about your suicidal tendencies. I don't know what to say to you anymore. I just don't want you to hurt yourself - really, I am trying my best to help you, but I feel like it would all be in vain in the end. Please consult a psychiatrist. I feel so fucking guilty. I want to push you away!


Stay strong.

Z,

You are right - I am a scum. I won't ever be a good partner or a good friend, and for that reason, I am going to focus on myself only. No more wandering. It's not just only you whom I yelled at, the last time we spoke, but also at some of my high school friends. I push people away because I don't deserve anybody. Did I mean all of those things I said in those emails? Well, some things, not all. I just wanted to piss you off, that's all. Some things were genuine, like the fact that you are stupid, arrogant, and selfish. The fact that you hate me gives me a sort of bliss: I no longer have fretful dreams about you. Hate is such a powerful thing. You'll never understand me; I am a tortured soul.

Anyways, hope you are doing well and hope you don't get to read this. Good luck.

I'm desperate to get a girlfriend. People tell me this is unhealthy and that I should focus on myself, but I don't want to do this. I just want to get a girlfriend.

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I have some sort of ethnic confusion. My parents let the television raise me. Since Hollywood favors attractive white people, As a result, I tend to identify more with white people. But since I'm not white, they don't feel the same way. And people of my ethnicity don't like me because I'm whitewashed. Therefore I have no friends.

>>18134548
Arghh I've been wandering out the city too scared to go into places alone until I finally mustered the courage and went into one bar thats known for friendly people, waited to be served but then panicked and left as the place was small and I felt like people were judging.

I might just go home and be alone like I do every night :(

I'm not interested in living, but too cowardly to face death. I'm an actual waste of space pretty much.

>>18133641
I didn't read your entire post but what I did read made me think of a time I was with some friends I knew because my mom was friends with their mom. They left us at home for Christmas or new years so the 4 of us drank all the beer in the house and put the cans on the Christmas tree as decorations. My mom got a kick out of it when she got back to the house, but we were all passed out by then. I had to be on the beginning side of middle school.

Third birthday with no friends around. Well this time I don't care, at least it's Sct. Patty's day so I'm gonna go around and drink myself dumb. I deserve this since all the letdowns came crashing towards me while holding hands.

You assholes say time and time again that this big house we all share is practically a halfway house with people you don't know crashing on couches. You talk about how Christian you are and constantly ride around on your pseudo-righteous high horse. When I found this little old homeless lady who's sweet as pie, doesn't even smell, and has some serious, internal health issue as her feet, ankles, and hands are swollen as hell, you gave me all kinds of shit for ASKING if she could stay with us for only one night. The lady herself said that she would "sleep on the floor, leave at 7:30am, and never be seen again". She can barely even walk, and you think she's going to rob us? She's a 70-something year old borderline cripple, for goodness sake. "I don't like strangers in my house." You know, I don't care what religion you subscribe to, but you're irritating as fuck when you claim to be oh-so-holy and better than other people for it and then bitch about sheltering a sweet, elderly, homeless, near-cripple for one night. Maybe you should go find your Jesus, you fucking assholes.

ugh. I want to call you. I want to cry and confess everything that has been going on. I won't be selfish and I'll pull through instead. We weren't together after all and I will continue to feel hatred towards you because it's what you deserve. But just be made aware that I want all these things. If you didn't have sociopathic tendencies I feel it would be made easier for me to contact you, to call you like I did weeks ago at 3am. You were all I had, my only familiar face. Fuck you, seriously. And continue to stay the fuck off this board and in your containment board in your containment thread. I gave up politics to stay / get away from you.

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Life is SO fucking WEIRD and it's all my fault for being so fucking horny and refusing to fap. I fucked a fat girl multiple times without any condoms. I came in the mouth of one of my closest friends and the "token girl" of our group, who just happens to be my friend's ex who's TOTALLY still in love with him, but I'm like 90% sure she likes me, too, and doesn't want to make it weird, but we're also platonic friends, but she also kisses me. Our mutual friend, whose ex she fucked, just super-liked me on tinder, and even a literal autist like myself can tell that she's got butterflies for me because she played handsie with me when we were drunk, and now the same two girls are rapidly approaching the point where they'll have had the same dicks inside them. Meanwhile, I'm rapidly approaching having at least made out with every girl in my friend group, and I feel like a whore or something. I didn't think I was gonna have a high success rate so I just threw hints everywhere and it's worked almost universally and now I'm officially that guy. I swear to God they all know and I can feel it on the back of my neck when they look at me. I can't talk about this shit with any of my friends, either.

Jesus fucking Christ, my body is a conduit for so many overlapping incests. And none of this makes any fucking sense because I'm literally the size of a 12-year old girl and a 4 at best. I swear to God it's pheremones or something, because I turn into a fucking harem protag (DOUCHE) the moment I stop fapping, and I've woven the most awkward fucking web and it's only possible because I don't talk to anybody about my sex life or my feelings and now I feel like a fucking weasel.

FUCK ME

Everything will be okay.

>>18134725
how can you be so sure of yourself

>>18134728
Yourself is the only thing in this world you can ever be sure of.

>>18134265
my bd is tmrw too

>>18134710
Teenagers are wild...
Whatever happens anon, don't be a slutshaming asshole. I dated the manwhore of my social scene when I was in college and it was fine, nobody held it against him what he did, but also he didn't kiss-and-tell.
Keep everything cordial, be nice and don't be a douche to the girls you slept with or it will backfire on you

She moved away last year. She's a terribly vain person but she has a nice body and face, and I fell in love with an idealized version of her in my mind that wasn't a piece of shit.

The only real way I could get over her was by treating her like shit and making her cry before she left.

She was never my girlfriend, fuck, she never even liked me. That was the hard part to live with.

Thing is, I've become so ass-backwards and /b/tardified that I actually believe treating girls I cannot have like shit is normal.

I wish I could learn away to legitimately get over them without having to resort to beta Sour Grapes methods.

My ex keeps sending me memes that aren't funny but she's only putting more effort in because I'm opening her messages and not replying. It's not that I dislike her, I just don't feel anything when talking to her. I would normally be polite and reply anyway but when I'm talking to other girls that put more effort into our conversations than she ever put into our relationship, there's no real pressure to entertain her.

>>18134757
Dude i know that feel, I am that feel. I have gone over that with two different chicks. Its fucking stressful and brings out the worst in you.

All i can say is that bitterness is cancer in emotional form. Once i figured out that out it got a little easier. My best of luck on your emotional journey friend, hopefully it leads to a much better place then where you are now.

Tomorrow will be one year since you first told me you wanted to leave.

My sincere thanks.

I have to keep reminding myself that it's NOT ME and that he really NEEDS TO BE SINGLE for a while due to a recent divorce, and I'm perfectly fine with that. I mean, take as long as you need dude. I'll wait for you, it's not like there's a huge fucking line of men wanting to date - or fuck - me. It's not like I'd be hurting anyone if I waited for you.

>it's a "i got trust issues so i'm going to fabricate an unusual situation and judge you by your unusual reaction" episode

I thought I was the anti-social one but it turns out that it's a normal thing for "honest" people to be indirect and passive-aggressive when it comes to the most important part of relationships. I shouldn't have to hear from a stranger that my boyfriend is mad after asking him why he's mad. Or have him show the most disinterest when I try to initiate some way for us to emotionally bond and then get shit for not feeling physically attracted enough to have sex with the guy who shunned me for days. I shouldn't have to sit him down like a child and ask him to tell me his honest feelings about our relationship for him to show apathetic disinterest again to get tl;dr texts and facebook messages about how I didn't "give the relationship a chance" once I've made it known that I'm moving on.

What's worse are the people blaming me because I didn't meet his "needs" (apparently sex and showing off for his boys) but nobody asks about my needs as if having a manchild who doesn't want to talk to me because he's going to throw a silent tantrum for not being able to do what he wants with me without my consent to call for a boyfriend is enough.

>>18133941
share it here. I'll understand.

>>18134427
I love you more than you'll ever know, I can't express myself or verbalise what you mean to me. But that's ok, for i feel that spending time with you hints at what's hidden.

>>18134530
Stockholm Syndrome my friend

Start by creating something for you to value in life, pottery is a great start, you quite literally create life by tender care and can be a good zen when life gets hectic.
It will get better anon, you just have to try your hardest.

Isabella (She doesn't know what 4chan is, so it's ok)

It hurts that this relationship isn't the same as months ago, we don't say ''good morning'' to each other at 7 am like we used to, we dont talk about useless things like we used to, bit I'm not brave enough to end this relationship just because ''i don't wanna be alone''.

So, let's see what happens next week.

Just wanted to wish you a good day at work. Hope u are well. Wanted to say, I hope that you will please think about it? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, I may be already. I do want to deal with some of these issues so we can work well together if there is a chance. It not easy to just be silent about all this. But, I'm here for when you want to talk. Take care and I miss you.

Didn't match to any pharmacy residency program today. There's always phase ii applications, but I don't think i have the energy or money to apply again. Job hunting is draining.

I don't love you, hell i don't even like you that much, but the fact that you got back with your ex after telling me countless time you wouldn't makes me extremely angry. You keep saying he changed for the better but you know that's not true. You went back with him because you can't bear loneliness. I liked being your "lover" or "stress reliever" even if it lasted only a week and i hate that we can't have sex anymore because of your cuck bf.

Enjoy the sadness, I'll find something to ease my bitterness

So I had to drop last semester because I was depressed after a close family member died, then my dad got cancer and I had to drop this semester to help him out, and after all of that, my GF left me and I feel broken. I've always wanted to move to France (stayed in Paris with my GF last summer) and so now I feel like my life is on a tipping point. Do I

A) Enlist in the French Foreign Legion, hope I don't fucking die, and gain citizenship to live in France?

or

B) Not try to run away from my problems, deal with it, and finish college ?

>>18135373
the latter. You seem like a rational person. You would now betten than to run away instead of facing your problems

>>18134595
what do you do when you're alone home? Do you have any hobbies?

Why don't you want to be with me?

Dear G,

Man this thing we have is really falling apart wouldnt you agree? I really did want to like you, but we are so different that I started to find you unattractive based of your personality. Im sorry about the terrible sex, I just dont know if I can keep doing this friends with benefits thing. you just dont text me a lot, or youll just send one text and never reply. You always talk about the other guys you want to be with, and it just makes me feel in the way. Anyway, Im sorry for what Im about to do, I hope we can just be friends

>>18133641
I have very little libido, porn gets me hard but then as soon as I cum I'm done for a few days. I don't enjoy cumming to porn either but thinking I can't get hard to anything is stressful. I suppose it's a never ending cycle.

I would simply like to have the libido other guys seem to have.

I finally meet a decent guy and he's religious of course of course... Why is it so hard to find a boyfriend???

>>18134412
Lol, this is why I don't feel bad about lying to girls.

>>18134195
Saaaaaaame

Look, I know you think this isn't going to work, there are like dozens of reasons why we can't live together, why we shouldn't be together. We're really different but somehow I choose you. I choose you and I loved you, that's what I wanted. I could see that you wanted it too but you're so afraid of everything and have million doubts in your head. I'm scared too. It's the first time when I'm being able to give a fuck to another person. And yeah, I may be spoiled and want more from you but it's so warm and good with you, I want to be with you more often. And yeah, logically you don't want me to live with you and I don't want to live with you cause you're such a pain in the ass! Why would you get all irritated on something insignificant and then when I react or get offended you say: I don't like when we argue. Like WHAT THE FUCK. Don't you the most logical and smartest person? Why are you so unerasonable in such moments? Is it because all of that? You came back to me everytime and hug me that feels sooo lovely and sweet I want to hold you forever. But I'm afraid that you'll stop trying one day. That you'll say that it's not working and leave me. Cause, you know, I want to try and I want to grow and improve as a person through this. And I want you by my side.

Fucking Christ why won't anyone hire me? It just feels so damn pointless sending out application after application.

You destroy me. Kryptonite. Fuck.

I know you're going through a hard time, but you're being self-indulgent of hurting me! Don't you see that? try to imagine if we reversed roles - how would you feel if I acted like you right now? Learn a little empathy!

>>18135691
you make it difficult to be nice a lot of the time

>>18135691
Tell me these things directly. Not here, but to me directly. Speak to me with importance and I will do my best to understand.

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For the past 3 years, I've been curious on why my parents or sibling doesn't contact me. I live with my cousins and they don't even talk to me either in the same home. I honestly don't understand why it's so hard to interact with my close family. Maybe I've adopted or something who the fuck knows. But really I've been so down for years feeling like if I died no one would even care if I did, or just straight up and left everyone since my family all live in the same state.

>>18135613
Deannn lol

I missed out on teenage love and it's making me depressed. It's an important part of growing up and me being the awkward autist I am caused me to miss out on that. I hate it so much. I wish I could go back. I wish I'd got a gf in my high school years. It sucks knowing that people younger than me are experiencing love and sex while I'm all alone.

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The last five months or so, I've developed the biggest crush on the girl that has recently become my best friend. Long story short, we've made clear many times that it's not happening anything else other than being friends.

Of course that's not a bad thing, not at all. But everyone around us keeps asking over and over again if we're dating, or if we're flirting, or apparently expecting something to happen soon. People insisting that we SHOULD be more than friends, people actually treating us like a couple.

One teacher talked to her about us. And maybe I'm taking it out of context, but apparently he asked something along the lines of "He's not the right boyfriend, is he?", like implying if not for one or two factors, I would be.

And there's another friend that knows the whole situation and said to me, sincerely, heartfelt: "She'll realize one day that she should be with you. One day she'll realize that she shouldn't be going with bad guys and you'll be together".

Of course, most of this is bullshit from people that don't know the whole picture, or maybe comments from people that just wish the best for me. But it pains me that they give hope on a situation that doesn't seem to have any future.

>>18135657
Keep your hopes up! If you're not already, make sure to also give a resume with your application. I usually fill out the application online, and then take in resume in, in person the next day. I almost always get a call back. Good luck!

I know you are masturbating right now you dump fuck

>>18135898
Take a picture and post it.

I get a little sad sometimes

Yeah no

I wonder how much of the women I come across on a daily basis would let me drain my balls in them? Better start asking.

Z,

I had a dream about you a couple nights ago. You came all the way out here, and we got to meet irl. I was shy, but I still gave you a huge hug. Then our eyes locked and we leaned in closer, but at the last second I shied away and didn't let you kiss me. Seeing your smile in person, even if it was just a dream, made my heart melt. I hate that I will never actually meet you. I hate even more that I get jealous when you talk about that girl you're fucking around with. I'll do my best to stay your friend, and be there when you need someone to talk to. I just wish we lived closer. I think things would be very different if we did. I miss the way we would flirt. But I always knew it wouldn't ever be anything more than that.

>>18133641
OP, STOP IT RIGHT NOW.
I lost a friend like this.He died of cirrhosis at 29. It's an awful and painful death. Really. He was litteraly yellow when he died, we couldn't recognize the corpse.Fucking stop it, now! Go to a doctor, ask for help. Even smoke weed if you really need to "have fun". Save yourself, believe me my friend regreted it all when he died. His last words were "I played, I lost", and he was sad and scared. I hope you will be ok and take care of yourself.

>>18135714
Why don't you contact them?

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You fucking dependent whore. I know I broke up with you, but you rebounded so fast and fell in love with the actual embodiment of /b/. He's fat, has greasy long-hair, just favorites meme pages on facebook all day, but I guess he's a "sweetheart." You have such so many self-confidence issues, you'd hook up with anyone who tells you your nice.

You didn't want to have a threesome with me, but I have such a paralyzing phobia that you and your undeserving fatass boyfriend are going to do it because you know it will make me feel like absolute shit.

In fact, I feel like it's already happened. That's why I feel so numb and depressed all the time. I can't do anything about it, and it's fucking killing me on the inside. If I get confirmation, then I'm going to fucking snap.

My life is amazing, and I'm going on to great things, while you are your boyfriend are going to end up like your parents, unhappy and abusive alcoholics. It just hurts knowing your giving some other guy all the things you denied me.

You're a spiteful bitch, and I'm glad your gone. It just sucks knowing that you'd do something as amazing as a threesome with some rebound human reject.

You cut yourself, and blamed it on me, you always pull this victim shit. Then you threatened to sue me, and blackmailed me unless I gave you your jacket which I'm 100% I never had. I hope you finally get enough sense to kill yourself.

Why do I still think about you? Why do I still have feelings for you? The girl I fell in love with is dead, and she turned into a monster.

am i really that dumb to hope that after all that has happened there is still a chace that you will change your mind and want us to be together? Why am i so stupid..

I'm so lonelyyy! I'm wasting my best years being single.

>>18136268
Why are you single

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I've always thought that there was never EVER a good reason to cheat on somebody. All of my previous relationships ended on finding out that my SO has cheated on me.

And for once a relationship I have ends w/o cheating, or at least a very well hidden one. This bothers the shit out of me...

I've just been thinking to myself and crying at the possible realization that there could be something wrong with me. That I'm completely oblivious to my actions and words that always seem justified.

I want to identify it, I want to find a solution, and mostly if I can fix it - i will find a way to change.

And ofc the "SO" has completely ignored me so I can't even get an answer or even any recognition for that matter.

I'm so frustrated at this glaring hole that I don't know where to even begin.

Any help would be well. A step somewhere

>>18136277
I haven't met anyone I like. Where can I meet people? I only have a couple of friends

>>18136288
It's not you, it's not your fault you're being cheated on.
It's the fact that we live in a society that values instant gratification over hard work and perseverance.
The moral fabric of today's day and age is riddled with holes and weak spots, don't change who you are because of it.
Believe me, there's others out there that feel the same way and treat a relationship and their partners with respect. You'll find someone that shows you the same loyalty you show them; just give it time and don't waste time on people that don't treat you the way you should be treated.

I can't believe after the two years of emotional investment in each other you could just get with someone else two fucking weeks later. After literally everything we said and did, all of our plans, everything. It's all gone and you told me there was nobody else, but there was. You've broken my heart and you were the one i wanted to spend my life with. You were everything to me, you made me who i was and made me safe and secure, you made me feel wanted again. I miss those nights we'd look into each others eyes under the covers in bed and make love, we fought the world together and nothing else mattered. It was us against everything life threw at us and we were an item. I've never had such an experience before, and i still love you with all of my heart. And one day i hope you realise that what we had was true love, and will never die.

I fucking hate all of you who hurt me. I hate you mother. And father. And brother. And teachers and classmates. My pain is deep and you changed me. All I wanted was some affection as a child. And you all fucked me up. So thanks to all of you. I hope to forgive you. Thanks mom for every time you devalued me or hit me or my dad. Thank you, you crazy unstable sick bitch! You could have been my only light. But there is none.

>>18136307
I have no friends how should i know. They are never with me when i need them. I'm so terribly lonely too

>>18136340
I've been getting out more and trying to be more social and it's getting better (I had no friends either a couple of months ago, I feel you). Saying yes to everything.
Maybe give your friends a chance, I regret ditching all my old friends. You sure they're never there when you need them? Maybe you're forgetting good things they did to you. Maybe they didn't realize you needed them.

>>18136315
Thank you, i needed that so much - i just didn't know what it was in words.

That also confirms my accumulative disdain towards snapchat and social medias in general - in regards to instant gratification.

>>18136358
You're right maybe that is the case. I'm just having a really hard time right now and i'm trying so hard to pretend that i'm fine that it takes all my energy..yet i can't sleep, than i can't work and i'm constantly torturing myself and i don't know maybe i sould just buy some antidepressant though i dont actually thing i need one. I'm just really confused and alone and tired

I've started to wonder if love and companionship are even worth it, if most of the time I just feel lonelier than ever before. I handled it much better when being alone was just solitude, instead of loneliness. Knowing what the alternative can offer has transformed my precious alone time into something almost hateful, when I have too many days all for myself. Sometimes just giving up and going back to what was comfortable seems like an attractive idea. Silence used to be comforting, now it's just acute.

>>18134274
>it started back with the guy who literally tried to fucking buy me

Greentext please, that sounds hilarious.

Also, out of curiosity, how much would he have had to offer?

>>18135909
a picture of what you dumb shit?

I have had the most insane crush on you for years, and when you got married - I was both thrilled, and heartbroken.

I'm STILL crushing on you.
I'll ALWAYS crush on you until you are mine.

But no matter what happens, you'll always be my dear friend. Love.

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>>18133641
Fuck women, tried to break up with her 4 times because i knew she was going to cheat on me and she cried and got me to stay with her
Then she leaves me for some dude she met at a concert?
Fuck her, now i feel like i lost and after 4 months shit still fucking hurts.

I don't care enough about life to fix my problems. Feels strange knowing it's over this early.

My girlfriend of 2 years left me last week. She was my best and only friend.
For 2 years I spent all my evenings talking to her and spending time with her, now she's gone and I have no one to talk to.

I'm sitting alone in my apartment and I'm so lonely, I just want to die.

>>18136506
I know this feeling because I'm going through literally the same thing. 2 years and she was my best friend and we did everything together, and she left me for someone else after 2 weeks of breaking up. You're not alone in this world friend.

>>18136506
Fuck dude I empathize with you so hard (well not her being my only friend) but nonetheless her being my best friend, who I reached out to at times like job ventures, at times when I see things that reminded me of her, and remembered that if at least not for myself - than work for her.

When in retrospect. I should've forgotten about her entirely. (That amazing girl who gave me hope 4 years ago, is nothing but AWALT) All that shit, the emotional and physical support, the offers to help her with money, all. fucking. MEANINGLESS. to her.

You're not alone, they will never realize how good they had it. Work on yourself.

Burn, sell, trash ANYTHING that reminds you of her. Change your notification sounds, vibration pattern, change your phone's home menu layout, change your furniture layout. And BLOCK HER OUT OF EVERY FACET YOU CAN.

Gl on healing, and never call her message her etc.

I'm so fucking jealous!! damn it!! why the hell did you have to start talking to my friend? why him? could be any of my friends but him! and why did you stopped talking to me? i hate that i'm so fucking jealous. GOD FUCKING DAMN IT

I became hot as fuck after you left me and I found someone who actually cares. I didn't lose anything at all unlike I thought at first. You cross my mind sometimes like this, but only because now I finally realize how much you suck.

>>18136335
I'm so so sorry. I feel you right now. My family hurt me my whole life and abandoned me when I needed them the most. If you were here with me I'd hold you and we'd cry together. I miss my children so much right now... oh god. . What am I doing here reading this I'm out of my mind

you haven't been well lately so you stop talking to me. me alone. you can still talk to everyone else, including my friends. but not me. because what? why? it's been so long I don't even care anymore. fuck it, and fuck you too

>>18136364
No problem, it's true; I feel like we're a dying breed and especially in today's standard of "happiness"
I quit social media years ago and it's nice to not be clouded by materialism & diluted senses of ego.

>>18136539
Not the guy you responded to but I'm in the exact same situation. We broke up in January, haven't gotten over it. I've attempted suicide twice now in the past week, and i can't seem to let go. It was so real to me, it's like I'm living in my worst nightmare. She was my best friend and for two years we never argued seriously, there were no serious issues, but she left me for someone else she knew from years ago. We did everything together and we were made for each other. Now i have nothing and i feel cold and numb, on anti depressants and signed off work by a doctor. She was my world and now it's gone

I think I hate you. You've just become this angry slob. You bitch about everything and you're probably the laziest person I've ever met. Half the time I question when you last showered or washed your hands and sometime check your tooth brush to see if it's been used. It's all just really unnattractive and whenever I try to make things work and renew my love. You burp in my face with your gross breath and talk about shit that doesn't matter. Like I don't even want to have sex with you anymore. Not like you can stay hard even if I wanted to.

>>18136519
That sucks, but I'm glad someone else shares my pain.

How do you cope with the sudden loneliness?
I try watching movies, reading or playing video games like I usually do, but it all feels so empty.
I never used to look forward to going to bed or going to work, but now it's all I look forward to.

>>18136539
Right after she broke up with me, I blocked her out of everything and deleted everything that had anything to do with her.

>and never call her message her etc.
I already fucked that up, I messaged her the day after and we had a pretty serious chat.
It ended with her telling me she still loves me, but she needs time alone and we could talk about it again after her trip to Germany (in more than 2 months).

Fuck you, I won't wait 2 months so you can tell me you've moved on and found someone else.

This is the first time I have regretted getting an education. Everything is wrong, terribly wrong and it is my fault for being so stupid. I dont think I'll graduate and probably end up killing myself this year. I feel bad for my boyfriend and mom though. But it is for the better.

>>18136585
What happened?

>>18136579
I try the same methods, but i cant cope to be honest with you. Every video game we played together so i can't touch it. I can't listen to lots of songs because we listened to them on the radio in better times. I've temporarily moved back to my mothers because i feel like i can't be left alone, last Friday i was an emotional wreck and drunk called her. I went through episodes of total shock and loss, because i never saw it coming. I idiotically called her this evening, but the feeling wasn't there.

I still tell her i love her, I've lost all self respect and dignity i used to have. She was my one, and I'm at a loss with her no longer at my side

>>18133641
I'm so lonely right now, I have the looks to pull many girls for a hookup, but I just want one that will stay, I need love and support. The last girl who had a crush on me, did so when I wasn't emotionally available, and when I finally got through my issues and tried to pursue her, she was no longer interested, it feels like a cruel joke from God. I have potential but somehow can't do it.

Fml my disgusting taiwanese chink wife is going on and on about her delusional beliefs that she's beautiful. This is so embarrassing because she's physically repulsive and boring as shit everything about her is ugly. I wish she would just kill herself for being so hideous and jealous of people that aren't ugly. Fuck off of the internet Ami you chink pig.

>>18136594
>I've lost all self respect and dignity i used to have
I know what you mean, I can barely resist the temptation of telling her how I'm sorry for everything I've done wrong, how I love her and how I miss her.

>>18136592
Just doing awful at my courses, intership and I havent even started my thesis. But I cant do it, just cant get my shit together. I'm scared right now.

>>18136600
Lol why did you marry her?

I'm going to be moving this May. I cut ties to anyone in this town years ago because I thought I was moving away. These last few months especially have been terrible because I have NOTHING to do and know NOBODY in this tiny-ass town. All my real friends live hours away. I spent St. Patrick's day alone in my room.

I'm afraid of failing and having to move back. I'll have $5000 to my name by then and a car and that's about it.
My parents want me to finish my education and I do too but I can't fucking live here another fucking minute. I'll literally go insane and everyone who still likes me will have forgotten about me soon. I can't stand living without friends but that's how I've been living with myself for the last 3 months. If it weren't for online friends I'd have fucking killed myself by now.
I haven't found a place there yet. I have friends there but no one who I can live with. Don't have a job there either. I've been looking forward to living in the city for years now, i'm petrified that if I go broke, or if it doesn't work out, I'll have to move back in again and then there will be nothing about my life worth living.

It's only the thought of leaving and starting over in a new place that makes me get up every morning, and deep inside I guess I'm afraid that nothing will change, that I'll be alone forever

>>18136686
If something like this would happen to me, I might just scream and run away !

>>18136690
Why??

I'd become too excited.

I feel like we're not over, and I feel like you know that too. I saw you staring at me at that party, we made eye contact for a second. I saw something in your eyes and it gave me hope.

We spent four years together, we know each other more than anybody else knows us. I know it will be ten months since we've been apart tomorrow. But still....I feel like we never parted ways.

I would have loved to work things out. I know I made huge mistakes in the past, but we were at the stage in our lives where our brains were changing dramatically for the last time. Please don't blame me.

I've had three girlfriends since I last kissed you. I've fucked 12 girls and gone on so many dates I can't even remember all the faces and money I burnt through. I have no clue what you have been up to, and I think that's best. I hope you're doing well.

I reached out for the first time in a very long time last week. I was kind of surprised you didn't respond, kind of.

Reach out soon, it would be nice to see you. A lot has changed.

>>18133641
I fucking hate Canadians.

>>18136731
I hate you too

>>18133817

Because they think women are just sets of holes to stick their dicks in and that woman feels are invalid.

>>18134218

You're literally her used dildo. Stay in the trash where you belong you bitter cunt.

>>18136697
I mean, I'm actually a "man with a beard and tattoos", so waking up with another one "man with a beard and tattoos" in my bed would be quite weird.

>>18134412

I am a woman and have worked in a place full of women for 2 years now. On my 2 weeks' notice and I can't wait to leave. Even having one man in the workplace cuts the cattiness back so much regardless of what kind of man he is.

>>18134585

Are you American? It's not as bad up here in Canada.

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Idk anymore. I wanna know though. What do I want? Where am I going?....please infinite wisdom help me.

>>18136761
ha. wanna hit the gym?

>>18134710

>I came in her mouth
>She let me cum in her mouth
>Even though her ex is in the friend group
>I'm like 90% sure that she likes me

Men are so fucking clueless.

>>18136227

You sound like the spiteful psychopath in this situation tbqh senpai

I have no friends but I'm an adult moving to a new town soon. It's a tourist trap and the place provides college-dorm-style staff accomodations.

I'm terrified that it'll be like high school but having to live with my bully.

>>18136774
Here's the only thing I'm missing in the description ahah ! I don't have time to work out right now. I don't even have time to eat sometime, with the school ! Maybe next year.

>>18136625
I'm also struggling with my thesis, I barely started. I feel you. I think it's more fear than anything. You gotta push through, I'm sure it'll be alright in the end. Good luck

the only thing is i sincerely wish for is to be 12 years old again playing internet games and not feeling the weight of anything
i feel like i've reached a certain point in my life where nothing will ever satisfy me further and i'm never going to ever kill myself but i'm so scared that the rest of my life is going to be like this

>>18136839
This is what I've felt for years now.
Adulthood is a bitch.

please for the love of god don't ever say you want me to fuck you or even call me cute any of that shit if ur not serious about it
im trying my hardest to move on and learn the lessons i needed to
sometimes it's like you're trying to reinforce the feelings of worthlessness and failure that stopped me from being the person you wanted me in the first place

I need to stop drinking and go to bed but no one is here to stop me so that won't happen

>>18136888

I have 2 solutions for you bud: get a roommate (who is celibate in drinking) so you have that human presence at home; or stop relying on other people and really strengthen your resolve to quit drinking.

The world can't help you if you can't help yourself first. I say that as someone who always wanted to do things alone and have watched countless drug addict friends who we paid for their recovery in programs. All of which never successfully made it until they really made it for themselves.

>>18136985
the thing is I'll get up later than other people would, but no one is here to know. so there's no obvious effect.

i just enjoy it way too much. after a few i'm more relaxed, happy, amiable and laugh a lot more.

but there's always that niggling thought at the back of my head that this is fucking up tomorrows productivity (its 5.30 am here)

>>18136746
Fuck off

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>>18136775
I am clueless and don't understand subtlety. Please tell me what you mean.

Dear S,
I know you will never notice me but I'll still fall In love with you because I'm that much of a looser and I deserve to be alone

>>18136888
>>18136998

Same here and '8' is my lucky number strangely enough. I'm really feeling the effects of it though and getting to the age where my health will be a concern so I need to cut back. I really enjoy a good drink though so I hopefully will be able to moderate rather than abstain, but whatever is better. I've gone weeks to a month between sessions but I dig in deep when I do.

Cheers for now, I suppose. Take care, hydrate and such.

>>18135139
Why are you so sure you'll understand? Do you want to kill yourself too because of unbearable psychological pain that you hide daily from others and pretend to function normally so nobody will worry again? Do you love somebody who no longer wants to be with you? Do you constantly question why you're not dead yet? Do you also research effective ways to off yourself? I do. Almost every night I do.

I can't believe I've loved you for all of these years since our brief little thing... What would you do if you knew? Would it even matter?

My first love died. It was one sided, he didn't feel the same at all, but I was fine with being friends. He started dating someone and I moved away, but we kept in touch on facebook. I was happy for him albeit a little sad. I loved him, so his happiness outweighed my sadness. They merged their facebook pages and I didn't make the cut. We still had some mutual friends so I still got the occasional update about them. He seemed really happy, so I was happy for him. I moved back about a year ago, I heard through some friends they broke up and I thought about refriending him, but never did. Then they got back together and I thought it was better I didn't. I wish I would've fought more to stay friends with him because now he's gone. I loved him and I can't even remember the last time we spoke.

I really need help. I am so alone, and I really want to die every day. I have nothing but hopes. Someone please help.

>>18133641
so I had a date with this girl today that I had to cancel last minute. Me and her were both really looking forward to it cause of the snowstorm that happened the last 2 days kinda bummed us out. I asked her two times if she was upset with me because of this but she said no, but I can't keep shaking the feeling that she is. It's been bothering me all day and her texts seem to be less than what they were. How can I fix this, I mean we already rescheduled and all but is there anything else I can do?

>>18133817
Because you gals just don't know what you are missing on.

I honestly don't know if this is going to make sense. I feel like I'm falling apart. I tried to get her out of my head. I stopped talking to her, I started dating someone. And she doesn't talk to me too much, I feel like she's into me, but we both know it's going to end. We don't have too much in common and there's no connection. And I know she's not going to be the one, but I need her for the illusion that I'll not be alone anymore.

I don't get people, I don't get why they exclude me from events, I don't know why roommates hate me, I don't want to be here anymore. I want to go back and not remember that I met these people.

But I'm disappointed in you R, you knew I had feelings for you. And it hurts to see you everyday. It hurt to see you flirt with that guy. Right in front of me. You all ghosted me, and R knew I was alone! You weren't the person I thought you were. You broke me, I'm never going to be the same.

Why do we care about people who do this to us?

Im unemployed and if I can't find a job its become a hobo and fake my death or blowing my brains out. Why doesn't it feel urgent and why does a bullet in my brain seem like a vacation I really need.

>>18136847
I am serious. I'm so obsessed with you yet so afraid to tell you like I mean it.

Father died a little over a month. Feel empty. too young to be posting this shit on 4chan but whatever

I hope you all find solace.

>>18137198
Thanks anon.

>>18137068
Everything will be ok. It might be hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it's there. You'll reach it soon. Keep your head up. Try to love yourself as much as you deserve.

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>>18134765
So weird I am in a similar situation. I recently became friends with my ex on FB because he requested me to. Was on the fence about it. Boyfriend said that I should try to be friends with ex (Makes you the bigger person.) But boy do I fucking regret it doesn't know how to keep a convo going because of his ego. Spammed me with his shit unfunny memes most likely stolen ones. Leaves passive aggressive statuses after I specifically asked if he has no hard feelings.
I was expecting to be friends with him like we did in middle school but he is too goddamn full of himself to even see that. Also dude fucked his friend's EX GF of 4years. Really don't want to be the bigger person.>>18134768

If I had a contract written I would kill every single one of (You) people who crossed me.

>>18134265
Happy birthday

>>18134244
She left that part out when she sucked his dick. Girl wanted to have a "last wild thing" before she got married. Don't worry though she'll be back for the D and wreck her marriage.

I get crippling lonely at night and i want to have a partner to chat with or go on drives. I tried dating but i have not found a single person

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I've met the love of my life and I couldn't be happier about that. She's 28 years old and beautiful. We've been together for 5 years now and we want to grow old together.

Though to be honest, I really miss seducing older lonely women. I miss having flings with them. I miss falling in love with them and revel in the taboo-aspect of it.

I also really miss big fat tits.

It's all worth it, though. It's just that occasionally these memories awaken and hit me hard.

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I like you. Man, I do like you. I even ask you to become my girlfriend and you rejected me. And that's cool, because I just want to be with you. I don't really expect anything in the future, just a time together is already nice.

But, I know there's something wrong with you. I know you're not thoughtful. When turns out, you got a boyfriend, I'm not even mad or surprised. You even admits to me that he doesn't care about you and you just want to break up with him. But I know you're still deeply care for him. I can see through your bullshit, because why else you manage to went to his city for 6 hours, just for him to scold your bitch ass and left you crying alone in your room?

You purposely trying to avoid not just me, but everybody. You love him so much that you're okay getting hurt. We know we still having fun together but you wouldn't admit it. You purposely avoids me not because you don't want to interact with me, but because he doesn't want me to interact with you. Yes, he, that pussy ass faggot who instead acting like a man and confront me went we both watch movies together, he just said mean things to you and you didn't deserve that because you're a nice person. And now you didn't even reply my text.

I want you to break up with him. I don't even care if we can be together, I just want you to be with someone else better, someone else that can appreciate you better. Make up your mind dammit.

It's been over 2 years since I found out you were cheating. I knew inside anyway, just wouldn't admit it to myself. Your manic bi-polar behaviour, alcoholism and coke habit along with the cutting and self harm has left a massive dent in my psych. I've been with around a dozen or so women since then but I just don't think I'll ever be able to trust another girl again. You hurt me so much. I've been battening with thoughts of suicide everyday since. I'm pretty much an alcoholic now and live in a pattern of looking after myself, exercising, eating well and then something occours and my thoughts just spiral negatively till I mentally have to compose myself to counteract the suicidal thoughts.

I want to be with someone. I like in one of the greatest city's in the world. There is so much to do but I'm alone. I wish someone would show that I'm not a complete waste and I'm a good person.

I don't blame her for it. I don't think she was even aware of the damage she caused.

I just want to feel happy with my life and not that my existence is pointless and that I'm a failure of a human.

Fuck my boss and his hidden agenda to get rid of me. I hate working where I work, it took me a good amount of years to get used to this crap only to get a new manager who will go through every length to annoy the crap out of me for no reason other than to corner me in a situation where he can get me fired. I took the 'just smile and wave' approach to this situation so he doesn't have shit on me. Yes I am trying to get a new job, because fuck this one, but it's proving to be very difficult to get hired into a new position with all this competition. Can't afford to just quit with no backup. Problem is my approach to this is wearing thin and I am afraid I might actually one day just snap. I need a new approach desperately that doesn't stress me the fuck out, while I can still just do my job for this guy, and doesn't require me to quit with no backup. Gah!!!

When I was a teenager and smoked a lot of weed and did some drugs I was friends with some lesbo girl.
Usually we'd smoke hookah or weed and talk/game. and usually she'd want something (non sexual, material gain)
at the time I had few friends and accepted being used.
Im now older and recently she tried to contact me, and I told her I was busy, then promptly ignored her, and her sister.
Yet they remain persistent. While I do not care to hang out with them anymore.
To me it seems like a waste, I wouldnt really consider them a friend, I do not smoke weed at all anymore, they are not attracted to me either so there is no sex to gain, all in all, waste of my time.
How do I politely let them know that I do not want to hang out/give them my number

>>18137449
Just tell them how it is.

>>18137479
Make a move boyo

>>18137449
Be flat out, say you don't do alot of the things you did when you were younger so you don't have alot in common to begin with.

For the first time in a long while, I feel optimistic.

Since about 3-4 years ago, I've stopped enjoying almost every activity I once liked to do. My entire identity up to then was built upon me being a "literature type" of person, and once books stopped clicking for me, I panicked. I read a shit load of literature, both classic and modern, still nothing. It was only a few months ago that I realized my main interest switched from literature to music. I'm okay with that now.

But all the while, I stopped enjoying movies, TV, anime, manga, video games, and visual novels. I lost the amusement people get from conversation and the sensation of "comfiness" people get from falling rain. I didn't feel bad all of the time, I just felt nothing. Yet I still panicked a lot. I tried to frame it in some silly artistic perspective to make it seem important, and only became miserable in the long run. I thought it was my lot in life. Now I know it's a medical condition. There's no need to worry anymore, it's all temporary.

>>18137305
Thank you.

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>>18137040
Not him, but i have been having those exact feelings for 2 months now. I invested so much into her. I gave her everything i had to offer, my love, my affection, my sympathy, my financial and emotional support, and she made me happier than nobody else in my life. It was peak happiness, I miss her giving me a kiss in bed before she went to work, i miss her wanting so badly to hold my hand in public as we went everywhere together.

She left me out of the blue, after two years. And got with someone else two weeks later. I'm emotionally devastated by this, and my life has lost all light and colour, i feel numb and I'm constantly shivering, I've had breakdowns and panic attacks, and I'm on anti depressants. Not a day has gone by where i haven't thought about ending it, because I'll never be that happy again.

>>18133641
I am sorry dad for think that I want to kill you
I feel really bad for that even it's just thinking

>>18137260
>accepted friend request of ex
>surprised ex still has feels
I swear women are so fucking clueless..

>>18137672
Are you implying that you won't find anyone that you enjoy holding hands with in public?
Who will kiss you before you fall asleep?

>>18137687
Probably not, I'm ugly and she was a one in a million. I'm likely to not find that again

>>18133641
I don't understand you. you gone from wanting to get closer to distancing yourself. Not congratulating me on my birthday really killed my mood. So what the hell do you want from me?

The girl I've been hanging out with is out of my league and will probably be leaving the state after her residency.

It's pretty shitty but I guess the lesson is to live in the moment and be content.

>>18133641
I'm sorry bf, but I am seriously getting over you if you're not treating me like a gf. What's the difference between me and a single girl now? None. What's the difference between us and regular friends? None. Oh wait, my friends treat me better than you do.

I'm giving you two weeks. If our relationship isn't getting better by then I'm breaking up with you.

>>18137690
She was one in a million?
She took your emotional and financial benefit and walked out after two years. Dudes need to realize these aren't good people. These people aren't good for you. They will drift until they age and their looks wither and then they'll settle, reflecting on the many given up opportunities until they die.

>>18137723
But it was real to me, for two years it was authentic and genuine. We loved each other, and we both fell hard. I don't think it could happen to me again. Not something to that level

>>18137749
You fell hard, if she moved on so quickly it doesn't sound like she fell at all.

>>18137755
It was an LDR so it was complicated. But not that far away, we met every two months and i lived in her country for 4 months together. She did love me

>>18133674
Hey anon if you're still reading this could you please livestream it? Thx

>>18137749
How can you even say that?
That's like having something really good at a restaurant on a daily basis, then the restaurant discontinues the menu item and you don't know what to do with yourself but you're so convinced nothing else will measure up without even trying

>>18137761
Because nobody will love me again, nobody will see through me again like she did. I'll never have that same feeling again, not at 25.

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>>18137773
Nigger you're 25 not 45 if you don't jump back on that horse sooner than later it'll seem taller and taller as the years go on.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LstIgtkEe50

>>18137779
You're right. And maybe it's part of the healing process but she's getting nasty and criticising my performance in bed. I hope this gets better, i tried suicide twice last week

>>18137785
You're still talking to the woman you spent two years with and left and found someone else within two weeks?
>healing process
Kind of counter intuitive, isn't it?
She's saying shit to rattle you. It sounds like she wants you to die face down in the muck. Don't give her the satisfaction.
and don't you fucking dare go out and find a girl so you can show her how happy you can be without her. Show yourself how happy you can be without her and she'll magically fucking disappear.

>>18137797
Thank you anon, this is the best advice I've gotten on this. Thank you for your kindness

>>18137801
I'm going through the same exact thing and I contemplated suicide on a daily basis, just as you have. Trust me these chicks aren't shit. You'll find that you fall in love so quickly that it will scare you.

>>18133641
I liked her, I liked her so much. Never opened up to anyone in my life like I did to her. Thought she also did the same to me; maybe she did.

Then one day she just fucking throws me out. I get angry. I fucking hate her.
Then she comes, tries to talk. I tell her to fuck off.
Now she fucking hates me because she's an egoistical bitch. Now she acts like I don't exist.

I fucking miss her though.

>>18134460
>who the fuck cares about female validation
I do!

>>18137843
Then post your titties and we'll validate you

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I wake up, I pretend my pillow is her, I try to visualize her...

She lives 11-12 hours away.. we only spoke like 2 times.. but she has no idea she totally stole my heart..

I wont see her till next year.. I didn't even ask if she was single..

At my job, I even get depressed thinking about the possibility of how pitiful it is.. or that she wont reciprocate my attraction..

Lucy, I know we didn't talk much.. but I was smitten with you, totally swept away.. I wanna be your man, and I want you to be my woman.

I want us to live together..either here in Miami or up in NC, whatever, I don't care..

I started researching apartments in her area.. I thought, as crazy as it sounds, that if I was local, I'd have a better shot. But of course, I don't even know her availability..

I wanna ...well...not forget her.. but not hurt wondering what she's up to..

"Have you lost interest?"
"I dunno"

ok.

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What store carries this?

You're close to me only because you don't have anyone else. At the moment.
I know that. You won't need me forever.
You'll be gone. Maybe to return. In the future.
I'll make sure I won't resent you. Hopefully, I'll be gone too.

>>18138008
You know nothing, fool.

>>18134668

She's homeless for a reason. Your housemates are correct.

>>18138008
I told you repeatedly I want to be with you until one of us dies.

I love a girl at work but I don't know how to tell her

>>18137079

She may have had people cancel at the last minute on her a lot in the past. I was seeing a chick who did that constantly, with the shittiest excuses. It has made me very cautious about such things.

Or, she may just be moving on.

I dont really blame everybody for not really liking me. Im a needy depressed sack of shit. I know that as a family we dont ever talk about things that matter and i thought i was okay with that. But finding me in the fucking bathtub OD'ing on my meds needs to be talked about. The stutter Ive had since the od needs to be talked about. You bought me a gun. The only one of us that is even slightly normal is moving away soon and i dont know how im going to deal with the quiet. I honestly wish you would start beating me again. Being acknowledged felt nice at least. Please talk to me.

>>18136775
>>18137681
>men are clueless
>women are clueless

So you're either a cat or one of those people that believe there are 100 different genders btfo. Fight me.

I fucking hate myself for always postponing everything to the last possible moment.
The work itself is not even subpar, the biggest problem is that I can't get proper sleep which fucks everything up in general.
My procrastinative habits have led to fun stuff like not being able to do mathematics until after midnight (my brain freezes otherwise).
Outside of school work, there's a lot of stuff I'm interested in but can't fucking commit to doing at all, especially since there's no obligation or pressure.
I'm rotting here, wasting time, locked into doing things that superficially seem "fun" to me but they just mask the dread of lethargy.
I'm scared of lethargy, or at least I was. I've become numb to the horror, it can't scare me into line.

>>18138058
You're a coward and a cunt..

I will prove anyone who has ever doubted me wrong

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>>18133641
What's the point of even trying to get a gf when our society has crumbled to the point where most marriages end in divorce that cripple the man financially, and most likely ensure that he will get basically no contact with his children.

Why even bother trying to reproduce at this point?

>>18133641
I did ny first slutty thing last night.

My friends dragged me out. Wound up getting drunk and dancing with this random guy. He was cute and funny. We danced for hours and started making out and I was touching his dick througg his pants. He wanted me to go back to his place but I was scared. I was also horny. So we went to a bathroom in the bar, locked the door, and fucked. He came twice. We tried for number 3 but it wasnt working. It was getting hot in the bathroom and we had been fucking for a while. We didnt even learn each others names. After we cleaned up and left the bathroom he went back to the bar and I got an uber home.
I still am kinda in shock

>>18138423
The only people who lose custody of their kids are shitty people. No one is going to take your kid away, even if your wife leaves you, just because. At best you will be in court battle for years.

>>18138438
> No one is going to take your kid away, even if your wife leaves you, just because. At best you will be in court battle for years.

You say that like it is supposed to be a good thing.
Women are financially INCENTIVIZED to get a divorce, and in vast majority of cased they get the custody of the children.
Why would any sane man take the risk of being emotionally and financially crippled and lose their children simply on the whim of a woman who is encouraged by society to leave her husband on as little reason as becoming "bored" with the relationship.

It is a bad fucking deal for the man from any point of view.

>>18138447
You sound really young and dumb. When you get older you will gain more experience. Chill the fuck out for now. No one wants to marry you anyways. Cross that bridge if and when you get there.

I'm probably going to be up late, if you find you online I'll say hi.

>>18138432
nice job you're helping to erode societal morals, congratulations

>>18138432
>i was drunk therefore I am not responsible for my actions
KILL YOURSELF

>>18138457
You provided zero arguments and instantly attacked my character, of which you know absolutely nothing.
Are you a woman by chance?

>>18138142
wow kys

>>18138468
Who said I am not responsible? Kek. It was pretty fun and exciting. Maybe you should try it some time.

>>18138470
Are you, by chance, under the age of 20?

All I wanted was to have my friend back. I get that we cant be together. I still love you and I get it. I see what is happening. I just hope you don't try and remove me from your life forever.

>>18138447
Prenups my man.

>>18138493
No, I am not.
Can you answer the question I asked?

>>18138497
Those get thrown out in courts all the time.

>>18138483
i hope you catch STDs you dumb clubwhore

>>18138502
Not if you get a good lawyer.

>>18138527
Which are in themselves, potentially crippling financially.

>>18138507
I already have one. Wonder if we swapped. Have to say, thats the only downside: going to the doctor for a screening. But I havent had one done in years and it is a good idea to do them regularly.

>>18138531
Kek. Jesus go whine somewhere else

>>18138546
Again you come forth with no arguments.
Besides, this thread is for whining your dumb cunt.

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>>18138142
Hey man, why do they hate you?

>>18138495
All i wanted was to be with you. I can't wait forever for you to make the first move. Make it happen and I'll be at your side, your best friend and you're lover. I love you so much.

>>18136845

Same here, turned from a fun-loving, popular child into a suicidal misanthrope who just doesn't experience fun in anything I do.

I hate you but I love you. Please get ot of my life. But pake me some new friends before you do that.

I hete me too.

Sorry.

Is it really such a bad thing to spend your free time sleeping?

>>18138574
Fucked my parents marrige. Played them against each other because I was a sad angry asshole. Mom took the little piddly shit i was throwing and ran with it to the fucking extreme. Started cheating on my dad. They are seperated and it looks like my dad blames me. Which i dont really blame him for blaming me for a part of it. Obviously there was shit going on anyway. But at the moment i havent done shit. I work 6 days a week and help buy groceries and im starting school. I should move but i dont have the scratch, friends or balls to do so.

>>18138778
No, but it's a symptom of some mental illnesses.

>>18138785
I'm fairly certain I have one, and I plan on seeing a doctor come the first of April. Seems kind of pointless that I should force myself to stay awake when I'm just browsing 4chan anyways.

>>18138799
>>18138784

It's not your fault. They both took their decisions too. We all make awful mistakes in our life time. You gotta forgive yourself my man.

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No one gives a shiiiiit.

>>18138935
Why so bitter?

>>18134296
>I'm fat
Then lose weight ffs, I wish all problems were that simple
Fat people are at the same time gross and just a simple diet away from fixing their most glaring flaw. I don't get fatties who complain about it

I hate everything and I want to kms. Boo hoo. Woe as me.

>>18138996
That takes effort and good jeans

I'm tired of begging people on draw-threads for porn but I only do it because I'm too poor to commission anyone.

I feel drained and numb like a robot. I just want to sleep all day and erase this day. It's getting harder to fake being better and ok.

I don't know what I'm doing anymore. All of my friends dropped me like hot shit when I came out as gay, one of my family members led a hate campaign against me, and I've been sick for a long time. I'm just starting to get better, but I don't have any friends, I don't trust my family. I don't know how to do those things.

Will life just be an empty set of doing 'things' if I keep going down this path? How do I even begin to change this? Makes me think that after everything has come and passed, and it's gonna be hollow still.

>>18137331
I'm with you. I'm so lonely and I even get asked out but I am so needy I don't even want to give anyone a chance to hurt me. I've put myself on this island and it's so lonely but at least I'm not using people to satisfy my lonliness and lust. That is something.

ANY ONE ELSE NOTICE 90% OF THESE POSTS ARE DUE TO FEMALES ACTING LIKE CUNTS?

THE HUMAN RACE IS FUCKED ANYWAY. KILL ALL HUMANS.

I'm sorrry that I'm so distant mother, and I am sorry and heartbroken for happened to you, but it kills me everytime when I see you. I know you had made some really bad decisions in your life that caused you to develop your mental breakdown. You shouldn't have gone off the grid and disappear like that after the divorce. You should have kept contact with me, I would have helped you through your hardships. You were gone for so many years. It horrified me to find you as a drug addicted mental case seven years ago, and how you told me that you lived like a vagrant. I love you but you rather abuse drugs and drink than to spend time with me sober. I really want to restore you but everytime I look at you I just know that I am way too late and the damage is done. You and I both know this, so does the rest of your kids. I will find strenght to meet you again but I was crushed the last time I visited you.
I love you but you are not the same anymore, I'll give you a call tomorrow

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsGODTySH0E

I'm finding less to like here and also waste too much time just mindlessly browsing. I think I'm finally going to stop visiting this site.

>>18139308
See you tomorrow

I fucking hate the autism spectrum.

My ex is autistic, and according to him, no one else is allowed to share that condition... Plus he's a fucking moron and then uses his autism as a crutch.

My Nephew is autistic, and is completely inconsolable when he's pissed; it drives me up the fucking wall because he wants nothing to do with us, then when we try to leave him alone he gets even more pissed. WHAT THE HELL MAN?

>>18134199
Who are these 2 people ? Maybe I can make them miserable

I'm not very fond of this state of mind. I've been missing him for too long, I can't be happy alone or with anyone else no matter what I try. There's no way I can ever get him back, even though we both loved every moment we shared. Being lonely by itself is okay, but it becomes unbearable when it's paired with yearning. I don't understand why things have to work out this way.

I hate my fucking life ! I hate myself for thinking life would get better cause it never fucking does , I had so much potential but now all I want to do is sleep . I'm always tired I'm always being bullied I'm always hurting . This fucking sucks no one understands and no one fucking cares . I wrote out my suicide note but then ripped it up cause no one would give a shit anywhay .

I can't stop imagining the scenario of talking with my ex over coffee, but I also have a better job and I've dated other girls after her, and maybe we don't ever get back together but for like a second it feels like we could. In reality I'm falling at the first hurdle. I can't even fucking bring myself to make a new okc account after rage deleting my old one. I live in a fucking dive and my job simply compounds my depression.

I fucking hate you Jeanine You lead me to believe everything was great between us , I worked my ass off for you I gave you everything your Ex Husband didn't , then your son calls me tells me you are missing all day I keep calling your cell phone all day I leave work early thinking you could be dead some where only for you to tell me you were outside but your phone broke ! Bull shit I start looking at your phone and see all the messages and videos you sent several different guys . You fucking Whore you dirtbag I find out you do drugs and in front of your children that's why your husband left you and now has custody of the kids , you are a compulsive cheater , liar , drug addict and thief . Go fuck your self it was all a lie he never beat you he never neglected his children .

>>18139468
holy fuck

I'm kind of really worried about calling my bf my ex's name whether it be during sex or not. I'm not in love with my ex anymore, in fact I have a pretty big distaste of him now, but I was with my ex for almost a decade (it's been almost a year since we've broken up too) and it's just kind of a habit because of how long we've been together. I think my boyfriend would be really hurt even though it means nothing.

>>18138785
Or having nothing else to do

>>18138789
Are you actually sleeping or just not getting out of bed?

>>18138079
Use your words

I'm lusting hard after a coworker.. he is 6 hrs younger than me. Fml. Talk me out of it.

We have stopped dating in 2015. We broke up because of my job, but we decided to still be friends. She uses to say she still liked me, even with the fact she started to date another guy. She felt sorry for being weak and not to stand firm against our break up.

She is still dating the guy. She still sy sometimes that she miss me. This is fucking up my head. I dont want to go back with her, but I still have some kind of feelings. I fucking hate the fact that the girl I used to love is still fucking my head up.

fuck I still miss you so much sometimes. You're as good as it'll ever get

>>18139568
do it

I don't know why I wasted my hard earned money on a phone and service when my own friends don't make the effort to call or text me. Hell, they don't even make the effort to message me on Facebook or email me.

Why am I so unpopular with my own friends? I'd say unliked but... I might be and they're just tolerating me.

I need new friends. But who's to say that those new friends wouldn't ignore me, either. Ugh... I hate people.

All I want to do is sleep. I can barely control my mood swings anymore. Fugg

>>18139597
Are guys in their late 20's into older women?

>>18139568
I don't think 6 hours is that big of a deal personally

>>18139650
How old?

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>>18136686
I sure hope so

I am the most broken human being that I know, socially, emotionally, or mentally. I can barely string together more than a few days of working competently before I have a few days where I can't even get out of bed. I have just gotten so used to this rhythm that I've become productive enough during my on days to keep getting through being a somewhat successful individual, but that's only because my line of work doesn't require a 9-5 grind and I can choose my own hours. I'll work a few 8-10 hour days, think I'm becoming a healthy person, and it'll last a week at most before I spend a few days unable to get out of bed again.

By many metrics I'm a successful person. I have a net worth around $250k with no debt in my mid 20s. I have a graduate degree in STEM. I have a job and I earn 80k at a govt job that I basically can't be fired from. I barely graduated high school due to truancy. I got my other degrees in spite of my terrible attendance because of how i was able to get shit done on my "on" days.

But I'm dead inside and have never really even tried to have friends or any real human contact. I have callouses on my dick from masturbating that make me afraid to even talk to girls in case it might go anywhere and they might see them. I've had them for years and am not sure if they'll go away even if I stop. This is mostly because on my off days when I can't get out of bed I masturbate on average eight times a day. Even on my on days I masturbate 2-3 times. I start to get good at being social and then end up losing the friends that I made by being a flakey piece of shit. I'm a friendless virgin who can barely operate this shit stain of a body and I have no idea what I'm doing with my life. The only thing keeping me going is my job. I know that I'm making a positive difference in the world when I can actually show up and get shit done. I just need to get my life in order so that I can keep serving my community, country, and those more deserving of being part of humanity.

I HATE THIS FUCKING HOUSE AND THE WORST PART IS I'M STUCK HERE FOR THE REST OF MY GODDAMN LIFE.

>>18138432
>my first slutty thing
>first
>falling for the "all young women have to act like loose whores at least once in their lives" meme

Sounds like you didn't even cum. Wow. You need to stop. That's BS propaganda that gets shitty frat boys laid and your girl friends feeling less shitty about their own sluttiness because another one is doing it with them. Once it goes wrong, nobody's going to accept that it was the liquor or peer pressure that did it, it's going to be all on you.

>>18133641
I was over her. We hadn't talked to eachother in months. I was okay with that. And out of the blue she writes me. Idiot that I am, I think I should be courteous and at least reply briefly.

Now I've been stuck waiting for an answer of this accursed woman. I'm back to square one! Every quiet moment is occupied by her!

At this point, I'm actually starting to consider that she's playing a fame out of pure malice, but then I feel bad because I know she's an incredible airhead who actually forgets about texts.

>>18139669
Kek. Yes.

Tomcat,

It's been awhile since I've even been to this site. And after all this time, I can't stop thinking about you. I replay everything that was said and done. I Google any information I can remember to try and ferret out any links to you. But you were always so distant when it came to social media. I thought it was cool of you at the time. But now I'm finding myself blurry on the details. We've blocked each other well enough and deleted all traces of each other. I miss how it felt being close to you, syncing the day around you.

Do I feel this way because of how awful I was to you? I wonder. I wonder if you were even real.

C

This is going to be over someday, perhaps not soon, or perhaps it will. It's been such a short time, but I feel like I am the one doing EVERYTHING, putting everything I can, and you just stay there without doing anything, like I have to push you even to get to know what's going through your mind. Why do I have to do everything? It would be nice if you showed some kind of care, or that you worry, or that you are interested in talking, or that you just talked to me about stuff, just some fucking initiative from your part. It's exhausting to feel alone, but not being it at all. I feel like I don't really know you, and my intuition is telling me to go away, but I don't want to hear it, not just yet, I know it will be over sooner or later, but I want at least to understand more and do my best, so I won't have any regrets. God dammit I feel so angry at times, with so much wrath inside me, distracting me from my dreams and goals. Fuck this, I am not for this shit. I will do my best, be flexible, do what I can, but I will not become something I'm not for you, and even if everything pushes me to get out, I want to really try it.

It'd be just nice if you tried it more too. Perhaps I am in another frequency. Perhaps we are just not meant to each other. In fact we are not meant to be for much time. This is uncomfortable... it's like I feel bad 80% of the time, I can't be in peace. It's the first time I go through something like this, and there's so much people that got it worse, but still, it's my shit and I feel bad, and I gotta work on it.

How I wish you had a different attitude towards the world. How I wish you knew yourself better. How I wish you weren't so passive. How I wish you had that special fire inside of you, a light, a motivation, passion. I don't see it... and I grow number and colder everyday cause of you, it's something I can't deny. But people do not change, only I can change myself, how I think and react.

I wish I genuinely cared less, but I care.

I'm such a major fucking pussy. Granted, my IUD makes me a hormonal little shit anyway but damn son, I wish I could handle my emotions a lot better than to cry all the gotdamn time when I'm over-stressed.

Maybe it's a good thing I cry like a bitch when I'm over-stressed... I'd rather cry than bash someone over the head with a glass.

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1am here (unsure of relevance)
> be me desu
> shy, autismo, redpilled
> meet friend of someone I am seeing
> told she is also autismo/redpilled
> she's a beaut
> insecurities and (unnecessary) possessive-ness kick in
> she privately told dude I remind her of yan-chan
> never uttered yan-chan related anything
> me: *becomes increasingly uncomfy, twisting fingers, constant fidgeting, blushing*
> turns out it's because of my serious face/demeanor and certain permanent marking on arm doesn't help
> Friend is uncomfy with my scars as well

I just want to love and be loved. God damn.

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Woke up this morning in a total mist from St Paddy's day. Somehow I had a green arm sharpie tattoo sleeve on the other, a gold chain, 5 new people on my Snapchat, everyone repeating stuff I said and talking about the all the shenanigans I did. Super embarrassed from making a complete ass of myself and blacking out most of the night, but everyone enjoyed my wildness so it felt good to be all the highlights of the party.

>>18138531
>assuming all random people are women
>calling everyone cunt because they're one themselves and muh anonymity protects me.
Kek.
This is 4chan either learn to take constructive criticism or gtfo.
Also would you rather have some money or no money (plus no kids and possibly no future waifu?)

Guten nacht.

>>18139950
I didn't assume that that person was a woman, hence I asked.
Also, I only called a single person a cunt, for acting like a dumb cunt.

>Also would you rather have some money or no money (plus no kids and possibly no future waifu?)

I'd rather have a life long, happy relationship and multiple kids, but such fate is quite unlikely in this day and age due to the fact that our society does not value loyalty and life long relationships anymore.

Gahhhhh stupid annoying thoughts that don't leave my head

I keep wasting time, and I know I won't stop it. They say I have potential, but all I know is my potential to waste time. It's pathetic. I'm such an ungrateful, spoiled shit, but I can't stop it. I'm going to continue working on farms all my life and doing manual labor because I don't want to handle responsibility or handle being an actual person. I'm going to continue socially isolating myself because I'm afraid of showing weakness, and I've felt completely incapable of hiding it. I'm mentally, emotionally, and physically weak and it shows.

At least I don't ever regret things and have the release of death to look forward to. None of it matters anyway.

>>18140029
Don't be pessimistic about it. There's someone out there that probably is thinking the same way about you but in female form.
Stay away from party/clubbing girls like the ones earlier. Learn to tell the difference from a toxic person and a genuine good one and you'll be fine. Also focus on lighting the fuck up no one likes a downer.

>>18140128
How can one not be pessimistic when everything in our modern society glorifies utterly degenerate behavior.
The chances that I'd ever meet a girl who shares my "conservative" values are slim to none.

Besser allein als in schlechter Gesellschaft.

>>18140222
Trips of truth mein neger,.

Taiwanese bitches are ugly as fuck and should kill themselves. Fucking gross~

>>18140368
>implying they aren't qt's

>>18139532
I'm sleeping, for a few hours at a time. Though I also browse the internet laying down sometimes.

ever since i kissed u it's like i've been spending my entire life chasing that feeling and since nothing i do ever lives up to it i am constantly shaming and criticizing myself
i fucking hate being like this

>>18140749
Wow, are you me?