Starting from square one

>>18132880
>how do i pick myself back up
Pick up your books and start reading them

>crippling depression
Pretty sure depression is a chronic disorder resulting in arbitrarily low mood regardless of circumstances, not feeling sorry for yourself because you failed and are now with people younger than you. Stop using that phrase or it's going to be your justification to stop trying.

>feels this
>feels that
Fuck your feels, faggot. Your parents, your father especially, raised you wrong and turned you into a weakling. You're not a child anymore, your feelings exist for you to identify and solve problems, not wallow in.

If you had a long history of depression, i might feel more lenient. You don't, so I am obliged to call you a useless whelp and condemn your upbringing.

>>18132927
Yea, I'm a piece of shit. I know. I just want to end with everything being alright. It's the least I could ask for.

>>18132974
Everything is alright, it just hasn't gone your way. Big difference

>>18132974
OP I'm in the same boat except my school didn't let me come back. I'm completely alone now and studying on my own with only my textbooks as companions until I sit my exams as a private candidate with the 20th college I called, all others said no.

Because if my fuck ups I will be going to uni at 20 earliest, more realistically at 24 if I decide to go to the military after all

You're dying of depression because you have to deal with people 1 year younger than you on your classes

Suck it up you pussy. I'd trade places with you in a heartbeat.

>>18134037
Really feel sorry for you, I do. Really makes me feel like a piece of shit for being such a bitch about this. I hope you do well in future and get into a uni as fast as possible. God speed anon

>>18134466
Sorry for being harsh on my original comment calling you a pussy, but you'll get used to your classmates and you'll also realise that some of your old friends may not stay good friends after they move on from school. It's not that big a deal to retake a couple years, loads of people do it (except me cause my school hated me lol)

This is your chance to expand your social circles and experience new people and new shit. Grasp it with both hands firmly like a phat azz

And to get started with your studies again, whip out your textbooks. They make them for a reason. Everything you need is in them. I basically taught myself half of the subjects I studied because I missed so much school, simply by using the textbook and YouTube for stuff I didn't understand easily.

Just sit down in your free time and read through it. Familiarise yourself with the textbook and it'll make revision easier too when you come to it.

>>18134502
Alright, thanks man. No hard feelings. I just hope everything will be alright by the end of it.

>>18132880
Stop going out and getting drunk, concentrate in your lessons.
Get part time job and start saving money, freshers is expensive, university living is more expensive.
Also take advantage of the time you can spend at the gym and not look like shit, clean up at freshers.

You've fucked up, but you can come back from it, when you get to uni just tell people you spent a year working or something.