Tell me about your toxic relationship, friend mine: A guy I've

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This person has martyr syndrome/complex. Constantly portrays herself as the victim when she actually instigates and purposefully causes incidents. Paints herself as "the good person" in these sick, twisted scenarios as well. "Woe as me, my life is so awful/stressful/hard, look at and acknowledge me with sympathy!" this isn't about a boyfriend it's about my mom. She's fucking sick. Sad thing is I moved 500 miles away to get away from her and came back when she convinced me she has cancer [this was a lie to get me to come back so she could win $50 in a bet to spend on weed... among being mentally ill and needing someone to constantly dump on]. I want to get my sister away from her then lock her in an institution and throw away the key.

>tfw I literally went back to my psychotic mother's

All I ever think about now is killing myself. But I won't leave my little moonbeam alone again. I will not allow anyone to take her away. She is all that I have.

Well my current relationship is very toxic. I'm very passive (idk about submissive) to a fault and the guy I'm with is a control freak. I mean this relationship started with him sexually assaulting me, me confronting him, and then me hugging him saying he's a good guy and it's not his fault. Knowing my idiocy I stayed with him because I just perpetuated something I wasn't supposed to, and I have not the courage to say what I think of him really. All the while he had a long distance girlfriend and he's convinced what he was doing is okay. Luckily she broke it off with him without my intervention which I should have done.

But it doesn't compare to what I project onto a guy I fucked a few times four years ago while I lived across the country. He's an artist and writer with cult following and I can't stop reading his stuff. The other reason I suspected I am in this abusive relationship is that my current boyfriend vaguely resembles the guy I project a lot onto. Only vaguely because the guy I project a lot onto is a beautiful poor saint who actively helps his community while my current boyfriend is an idiotic devil incarnate who feels like he's owed something for being poor. Anyway this is horrid obsession and I tried to tell him how I really felt but it didn't really pan out and I think I came off as creepy.

Tl;dr I am a coward who likes impoverished manic pixie dream boys

I am hoping after this is all over that I just live alone for a while.

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>>18132953
Here's to psycho moms.

Mine's the classic "tiger mom" type. You know, the type who ruthlessly push their kids towards ever-increasing achievements with little regard to what the kid wants. Nothing is ever enough. I could win a fucking Nobel prize and she'd still either find a way to negate it or make it about herself (i.e. "See what you can do when you only listen to your mother?).

She probably rationalized it to herself that it's in my best interests, but it's really about projected achievement. I'm an object of prestige that she can show off to her social peers.

The fucked up bit is that despite knowing fully well how the game works, I always end up doing what she wanted anyway because of this deeply-ingrained sense of inadequacy and need for validation.

>>18132217

Why can't you be in a relationship with them?

>>18132217
>>18132953
>>18132994
>>18133012

You all need extensive therapy, badly.

>>18133046
I'm acutely aware.

>>18133046
I was seeing a therapist who was amazing but she was $$$ and they were only Skype sessions

I am at a loss

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>>18133012
Here, here.
I'm sorry to hear about your mother. It's tragic how parent's can treat their children. Let's hope if you decide to have kids [this applies to me as well] that we will be better more respectable parent's children can be proud of. Take care and be blessed.

P.S. I was the poster with the mirai nikki gif and my mother actually packed all my stuff and left it outside for me today [her way of saying she's kicking me out]. I won't give her the satisfaction of being in my life any longer.

To >>18133046
I'm actually seeking therapy. But thanks for pointing out the obvious.

t. Femanon with mommy and daddy issues up the wazoo