How to tell if you're gay?

Go to a gay bar.
Sit down, talk to people.
See where things go.

Not too hard bro

>>18114754
is it normal for a man to just go to a gay bar alone? I don't have any gay friends or anything like that. I thought most people go in groups of friends.

>>18114744

you sound pretty gay to me, but im biased because you just told us all the gay shit.

that being said, you can tell if you're gay by exploring your sexuality.

>i dont want others to know

others dont have to. i used to be out, then i moved and made friends through wokr. i didnt want to be that guy that just asserts that hes gay just so people know, so it never came up.


people dont really NEED to know unless they're going to be seeing you be too friendly with a boyfriend, and sincei m more a single type it doesn't come up much.

my best friend only knows im gay because we met via asking him out.

my other friends of three years didnt find out i was gay until after we stopped hanging out.

my other friend never found out, which was hilarious cuz anytime he'd meet one of my gay friends hed be all awkward.

my most recent friend found out only because we were on my computer and i was going to show him the largest body of water in space, and when i typed in 'largest' it auto completed to 'largest gay gangbang' and he said 'welp i just learend something new about you' then we never spoke of it again.

point im making here is if you dont make it the basis of who you are, people wont treat you like its the basis of who you are. its a misconception that everyone reduces gays to their gayness.

gays reduce themselves to their gayness, everyone else follows suit, and then gays act all offended.

TL;DR go experiment, and don tell anyone until you feel like it.


one last note, just because you proxy yourself into one type in porn doesn't mean you want to be that type. for instance you may love watching gay porn of dudes sucking other dudes, so you might think that you want to suck dick (thats what i did). then you try it, and you hate it (like i did).

but it doesn't mean you're not gay ( im definitely gay) it just means that you probably prefer getting sucked instead of sucking.

>>18114757

depends on the area. here in LA everyone either goes in cliques, or goes knowing that they will see the 'usuals' there and form a clique.

but singles DO go, im single, they are just fewer and farther between. its fine though, you just get a drink, talk to qts and see if anyone hits on you. dont be offended if they dont, it doesn't mean you're not attractive, it just means people are busy with the people they're with.

>>18114767
Well, right now there's actually a guy I'm somewhat interested in meeting. He seems very nice, tall, handsome, fit clearly attracted to me. I would like to meet him in person but at the same time, I get the feeling I might just suddenly freak out and tell him to leave or something. I don't know how to explain it, I was raised to believe anything gay is very bad and so the fact that I've had gay thoughts for the better part of my life bothers me a lot.

>>18114775

bummer. no advice to give to that other than, get over it.

thats really all there is to it. you know its not bad, you know its ismply because of how others look at it, but its just a natural part of who you are.

it doesn't define you, it won't be your greatest journey, and you're not going to move to west hollywood to be a hair dresser and spend your weekends at the club pretending people think of you as a local celebrity.

you're just going to find another dude you like hanging out with and have a gay ole time.

>>18114757
Full disclosure, I'm a straight dude, but I roll in to gay bars/clubs/etc with my best friend pretty frequently (who is a gay chick) and yeah, from what I've seen, it's actually probably like 50/50.

It kind of depends on when you go too and what kind of place it is.

If it's like a night club or a weekend night somewhere busy, yeah a lot of people will probably roll in pack. If it's a more cozy place or a weekday, way more singles and solo regulars roll in.

Chicks (gay and straight) are the ones that tend to roll in packs, and usually the gay guys that go in packs are in packs with chicks and not other guys.

I'll also say as a straight dude who goes in to gay bars, no one gives a fuck. Only once have I ever had someone have a problem with me, and that was because he was some jacked up buff dude who was trying to force himself on some other guy, but the guy was shooting eyes at me all night instead of him.

>>18114778
I guess that's one way of looking at it.

I don't know. I always felt very inadequate that I could never just be a normal heterosexual guy. Like my mother is horribly disappointed that I've never had a long term girlfriend. I guess, at the very least it's worth trying to see if I am comfortable with it.

>>18114781

sucks that your mother cares more about a strangers genitalia more than your happiness.

if shes not willing to care about your happiness, than maybe YOU should. otherwise no one will.