ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

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Girls :
will i do fine in the dating scene in america ? (im french) i'm not autistic, pretty funny, adventurous, have many hobbies and passions.

>>18102214
You're insecure, but yes, you'll do just fine.

>>18102214
Guy here, but American.

If you have an accent, you are guaranteed action.

>>18102216
lol honestly it's not even a question of insecurity, i just ask by curiosity, thanks tho

>>18102221
i unfortunately do (here we find our own accent lame when it come to speak in english), thanks for the answer

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
>Anywhere outside. Or online.

I really hate this part. My major is 92% men, so I don't actually interact with women on a regular basis. I feel like I'm going to have to take up a club I'm not interested in at this rate or something.

>>18102235
you meet people by going out with your friends who invite their friends who invite their friends etc etc
It's freakin easy to meet people when you're still studying

>>18102235
Yeah I agree, its not as easy as they're making it, because cold approaches in public places have like, a 99% fail rate. Only real socially acceptable place to talk to strangers outside of a school setting is online and bars.

But at the same time, the best way to meet people to date is through friends. So go make friends with those men in your classes, because they're bound to know women they can introduce you too.

I'm in the same boat but reversed. I'm going into education, college is a tacofest. Handful of guys I do have classes, all taken, and not very attractive to me anyway.
But, made some lady friends, who introduced me to their male friends, and bam. Now I at least have options for nsa sex. Finding dudes in college who actually want more than just a quick bang is proving to be the bigger problem moreso than finding men to talk to now.

I (guy) often flirt with girls at my job and other places, but it's just people I see for a short time and it never leads to anything. How and where do I actually meet girls in a sexually liberated, European country (so not like in the US, here it's actually considered kinda strange if you're a virgin at 18)? How can I pursue girls I just meet and flirt a bit with?

>>18102238
>you meet people by going out with your friends who invite their friends who invite their friends etc etc
I suppose, but I'm pretty introverted and I only have two people I'd really consider friends and they're pretty similar on top of that. It's a closed circle really. I'm happy with how my social life is, but there's not going to be "friends of friends" popping up randomly.

Which then brings me back to considering joining a club I don't really give a shit about just to meet women now and then. Sometimes it feels like it would be easier if I just hated the rest of my life and wanted to rebuild it from the ground up.

>>18102264
joining a club you don't like is a bad way of meeting people.
Because they're all gonna be in this club because they're passionate about X thing. This is why people use clubs to meet people, to meet people they have something in common with.
If you don't have anything in common with these people, you're defeating the point and they're all just gonna catch on and be like "Why's this asshole coming even though he doesn't like this thing that we all VERY much enjoy?"

>rejection after rejection
>been dumped by a girl I had been in a relationship for 6 months because one day she decided to figuratively go "fuck off lol"
>same has happened to my friends
>casual sex and fuckbuddy arrangements are not feasible for me
>been cheated on
>my friends have been cheated on
>been a target for other scummy shit like character assassination

why even try if you can't win?

>>18102270
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mu5oUslEvPY

Girls liking anal:
how did your adventure started? Was touching your asshole always pleasant? When did you start?

Guy here.

How do I make my apartment more friendly to girls? I live with another dude as well.

>>18102274
wow so motivational my life has completely changed thanks to a hollywood script

>>18102275
I always fantasised about it. Asked my boyfriend if he'd be down to try some anal play, we tried and I loved it. He's not super into it, but does it because I like it. I was 18 or slightly younger.

I never play with my butt when I am alone, love doing it with him.

>>18102279
Uh, what exactly are you worried about?

Keep clean and hide your porno?

>>18102285
basically this. Keep your room and all common spaces clean. No shit in the sink, make sure your bathroom is always clean and has plenty of toilet paper. You know, live like a proper person and not an animal.

>>18102283
that may be cheesy, but the whole purpose of the speech is to moving forward and keep trying and trying until your succeed.
So don't be defeatist, and try again, and again and again until you find the right girl.

>>18102285
I'm not worried about anything. I just want to make people feel welcome in my home without making them feel uncomfortable and would like some tips.

>>18102279
Keep it clean. Wash your dishes. Pay attention to where you pee.
Have a trash bin in the toilet.

>>18102256
>But, made some lady friends, who introduced me to their male friends, and bam. Now I at least have options for nsa sex. Finding dudes in college who actually want more than just a quick bang is proving to be the bigger problem moreso than finding men to talk to now.
Stuff around here is pretty stereotypical nerdy shit, so it tends to foster an incestuous atmosphere. I can empathize with the frustration about how no one seems to want anything significant though.

>>18102284
So you never tried it while masturbating before you ever had a bf?

>>18102270
why don't you just enjoy sex and the intimacy you can feel from casual sex? god why are there so many people on /adv/ wanting "pure" women and no casual sex?

i'm a virgin guy and i'd fucking kill for some casual pussy. why are you people like that? you already fucking won ffs

>>18102287
it's fucking tiring to constantly fail and get hurt in this, arguably the most important (biology wise), aspect of life and it inevitably leads to defeatist attitude

I can take physical pain, I can push through to my absolute physical limit, but emotional pain is something else

maybe finding a woman is only for those with a good amount of positive reinforcement/positive feedback

>>18102303
No. And I still don't touch it while I'm masturbating.
Masturbation for me is just getting rid of a need so I can function properly. I don't feel any need to complicate it. If I want to get off, I go for the clit.

When I have sex with my boyfriend I enjoy exploring, pushing boundaries, roleplaying. There is a lot of psychological pleasure in fucking him, other than the physical one. I don't *just* want to get off.

>>18102309
how old are you ? 20 ? 25 maybe ? and you're alredy TIRED of TRYING ? just because of a few rejections ?
Grow a pair of balls man, seriously, you have the speech of a loser, no wonder why girls don't want you.
Get fucking confidence, dress nice, smell nice, enjoy your life, your hobbies, so you have something interesting to say and treat girls like humans and not some "lottery prices".

>>18102307
didn't mean to imply I don't like casual sex or that I want a pure woman

I said it's not feasible for me because I quit trying to get casual sex for the reason of only once in a blue moon succeeding in getting it regardless of my best attempts at it

>>18102290
Then just do what any normal person would when expecting company. Clean up, get all the smelly dishes and dirty laundry done, put private shit away and hidden.

>>18102307
>i'm a virgin
we can tell

Im essentially ruined.
Every girls Ive liked or loved has crushed my heart or used me for something and I was stupid enough to let it happen.
Now when a cutie shows interest Im having second thoughts about everything because Im an ugly fucker and she probably just wants to use me like all the ones in the past.
Im a social retard, I suck at everything and Im a slow learner.
I really do not see the point of living
My family were always outcasts but most of them at least looked pretty which made others able to overcome their bad traits. I have neither. It really feels like Im just here to suffer

Eugenics shouldve been a thing a long time ago and its a shame a large part of the human race will never know true happiness because of biological errors

>>18102368
You're gonna get a bunch of advice that will boil down to these two:
>just be yourself
>just improve yourself

How to stip feeling insecure?

Girls, do you wash your hands properly after putting in your ass or handling objects that have been in your ass?
I get the impression that a good portion of you don't. Some simply wipe their hands on toilet papers and pick up their phones.

>>18102214
french here. they love the accent. if you're not a weirdo you'll do more than fine.

This girl and I went back to her place after our last date and smoked a bunch of weed. I sorta passed out but we made out and she kissed my head before I passed out and went sleeping in her own bed. Did I mess up the encounter? I woke her up before leaving and texted her saying I had a good time.

>>18102665
should've just slept the night there and then smoke again the next morning and have some benis in bagina action

What are the key, most base things that women in general are attracted to?

>>18102681
Muscles, dick, aggression, excitement. Not necessarily in this order.

>>18102708
only stupid girls like this shit.

the ones you want are attracted to intelligence.

>>18102710
Are you sure that's not like saying only stupid guys like tits, ass and pretty faces?

>>18102713
Well it is.

If a guy is only looking for tits, ass, and pretty faces, and nothing more, they are an idiot.

>>18102681
Self confidence and self control.

>>18102717
I'm >>18102681 and I did say "key", "most base" and "in general"

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>>18102710
Besides your naivete, your biggest mistake is to think those attributes are somehow bad.

Girls, please: >>18102459

>>18102719
and stupid women would not cite intelligence as one of the key, most base things in general that they seek in a man.

why the fuck would you get with someone you cant have good conversations with?

>>18102720
not saying they're bad. never said that.

just said only seeking someone based off just physical traits alone, and aggression (lol), is rather short-sighted and indicates stupidity.

Females

Would you think less of a guy who takes antidepressants?

>>18102722
Intelligence and good conversations are important but if that's all a person can offer then they're obviously just a friend.

>>18102725
> indicates stupidity.

That's saying it is bad. And 'aggression' can mean many things, not just being a thug.

>>18102727
well I never said that intelligence is the only thing.

So basically, what I am saying: intelligence (most important) and physical attraction (no single variable dictates this, also most important).

Everything else is secondary whatever stuff.

>>18102729
well yeah, it's a bad idea to only look for physical attraction and an aggressive personality in another person.

also, assuming all, or even most, women want an aggressive man is just not accurate.

>>18102730
and this is in general.

for me, i cannot date a stupid woman. i cannot date an ugly woman.

some will forgo physical attraction.

i would be willing to wager money that the ones that forgo intelligence, or at the least mental perspective alignment, are gonna have failed relationships.

>>18102730
You said:
>only stupid girls like this shit.
not
>only stupid girls want this in their mate and nothing else
If muscles, dick, aggression and excitement aren't what women want in a man then what is?

>>18102735
>women want an aggressive man is just not accurate.
Yes it is, and I can prove it: what is the most prevalent form of aggression in today's capitalist world? Ambition. You can't bell well-off by being a passive, expectant person.

>>18102739
well there's all this other context i have given you in other posts, and i pretty much answered your question in >>18102730

so yeah. lol

>>18102748
america = the world.

oh ok, im sorry i didnt realize that bit of information.

Now, if we are considering the isolated population of america, then yes, a great proportion of women are into that sort of shit.

>>18102753
I'm Brazilian and you're dead wrong. The western world as a whole has American values.

>>18102756
I'm in a place in the western world where they do not predominantly hold this alignment of perspective with americans.

>>18102756
>>18102758
me too

>>18102752
Eugene(smart but extremely spergy and somewhat boring and weak person) from the Walking Dead with Brad Pitt's(hot guy) body and face.

Is that really enough for most women?

>>18102758
So your women like lazy and docile men? Sounds like a dying society.

>>18102765
So not being an aggressive person means being lazy, docile and ineffective?

Do you know what a spectrum is?

>>18102764
Intelligence does not mean being smart but extremely spergy somewhat boring and weak person.

I'm talking about charm/wit/knowledgeable/artistic (all signs of intelligence). Think someone like Neil Degrasse Tyson. Or Stephen fucking Hawking, for that matter. Bill Bailey, whatever. (I'm citing exclusively science people, but there are tons of examples).

What else would most women need to be content?

>>18102774
It's impossible to be an admirable and worthy man without the aggression and courage to fight for your place in this world and protect your kin.

>>18102776
that's a very narrow-minded view.

(coming from someone with a backbone)

>>18102459
Uh I mean I don't put anything in my ass, but I am sure to keep all toys that touch my vag clean, because that's just proper toy care.

I will admit though, when I use non lubricated condoms on my toys, I'll often just chuck the condom and skip washing the toy for the time being.
Typically I'm masturbating before bed, so I'll admit, I'm not rushing to wash my hands immediately after. Got some germx on stand by if needed though.
But frankly, I'm just not that concerned about my own pussy juices. My phone is already coated in germs, as is yours, and nobody's touching my phone but me anyway. Call me a gross disgusting bitch if you want, I touch door knobs without instantly washing my hands all the time. You touch so much shit out in public every day you can't keep your hands sterile all day every day.

>>18102718
this.

Confidence is 100% necessary.

>>18102782
But being overly confident to the point of ignorance will certainly repel some women away. Unless they are ignorant themselves and share the same beliefs, ofc.

>>18102726
not so much think less, but it would be a "yellow" flag so to speak, as is literally any mental disorder.

I even have issues myself, I've got diagnosed depression. But it's because I know how this shit works that I would be wary of dating someone with the same issues. It's hard enough for me to deal with my own bullshit, let alone take on my partners issues too.
I understand this is also why I'm single, and will likely be single forever as well. Because I would never expect anyone else to take on my baggage either. Depression is shit, it ruins a lot of things, but you play with the cards your dealt. Maybe someone will take you on, maybe they won't. You got a shit hand, but you just gotta work with it best you can. Thats why I wouldn't phrase it as "thinking less of you" because I know you didn't ask for this. Nobody does, you just are this way and you will be for life. Shit sucks, you can manage it and treat it, but you will never not have the disease. It can always flare up and come back, and not everyone is equipped to deal with that.

>>18102784
Well of course, extremes on either end are usually bad.
But everyone has their own spectrum.
Me personally, my sweet spot is a confidence level that just treads the line of arrogance. I like a dude who's slightly cocky in his ability, especially if we're talking in the bedroom.
But I'm not cocky myself. I'm the opposite actually. I'm just a super sub who likes super dominant men.
But even I'll agree, I don't want a completely self absorbed asshole that thinks hes better than everyone else. A dude who knows he's hot shit, but is still humble about it. That's my sweet spot.

>>18102774
Charm, wit and artistic prowess have nothing to do with raw intellect, other than the fact that it's easier for an intelligent person to have those traits but they are not at all required to be considered intelligent. People in Mensa can be dull wet blankets and your pop science people you cited do not represent the average scientist.

Stop making intelligence a useless word that describes a good personality, having a high mental capacity does not make you a charming person, it does not make you a person who always has something witty and funny to say or someone who has an artistic mind. It means they have the ability to acquire and apply knowledge and skills faster and more efficiently than other people. Someone with a 110 IQ who is charismatic, sharp of tongue, wise and artistic would fit the bill of someone you think women want but this type of person wouldn't be regarded as much more intelligent than usual, he wouldn't be able to get very far in any advanced STEM degree and he would make for a shitty scientist but it is what you mean instead of the actual definition of intelligent.

So use other words.

>>18102726
>>18102787
mind you OP, that was one female's opinion.

I'm sure plenty of females would think, "well i'm kinda fucked up too, and most people are. im not gonna write anyone off because they are using antidepressants. in fact, i would be inclined to give them a chance, as they are at least doing something about it"

And that is when it comes down this: why hide shit? You don't wanna bother with a person who you gotta hide shit from. They will find out. If they cannot accept you for who you are, they aren't worth bothering with.

Ladies, all others factors being the same, would you rather attend a college which has a campus that is 50-50 male:female or 30-70 male:female?

Girls

Clicked with girl on tinder and she gave me her number without me asking, then leaves me on read constantly. Just, why?

>>18102275
bumping my question

>>18102798
50:50.
But I'm slightly annoyed by most girls.

>>18102795
Oh yes, I'm not claiming to speak for everyone.

And I agree, you can't hide that kind of stuff.

Though all mental illness still has a stigma, like it or not. It does make people stop and think. I have no studies or statistics on how many people will think its dealbreaking or not though, and since I require cold hard numbers before I will believe "most" people do anything one way or another, I won't claim most will accept it.
I also cannot believe most will though either without evidence.

OP will just have to play it by ear. Don't let my single opinion keep you from trying. You'll just have to find out that data yourself through trial and error.

Girls.

I just started a relationship, I already changed my status on Facebook to ''In a Relationship'' without tagging the girl I'm with. But she wants to be tagged. Should I give in to her demands?

>>18102784
>But being overly confident to the point of ignorance will certainly repel some women away. Unless they are ignorant themselves and share the same beliefs, ofc.
Confidence has nothing to do with any of this.
I am a decently confident person but if you have a logic argument to back up your opinion and prove me wrong, I am going to change my mind.
I am confident in my abilities and aware of my intelligence, but I don't feel inherently better than anyone else, or shame others for being worse than me. There is a difference between being confident and being stupid.

>>18102279
Try to keep it clean and smelling nice. There's a difference between something being a little messy and being gross/dirty. also have nice clean sheets of you're trying to get a lady into bed with you. it's hard to get in the mood if the sheets are dingy.

>>18102798
I'd rather attend the university that has more men ideally, but 50/50 since it has more men compared to the 30/70.
Women fucking suck lol. We don't get along with one another well and every situation I've found where you cram too many of them in one place just dissolves into cliquy mean girls-esque bullshit.
And ESPECIALLY when men are so scarce, because we all go into this survival of the fittest competition to bag the man and fuck every other girl over from getting any man, regardless of if you've already got one or not.

When you have a better balance, or when the male side is heavier, it's not as chaotic in my experience.

fucking retyping this as I accidentally lost it fml

>>18102791
exactly. and people need to realize (if they aren't already) that what you state here is your own personal outlook/taste. there is literally an entire spectrum of people out there. there's an entire spectrum of people in the states. even in wisconsin (though I would admit that with smaller and smaller populations you will see a greater concentration of people that have a specific outlook/taste in things opposed to other things)

in other words, there's definitely someone out there for everyone.

>>18102794
i will admit that one doesn't necessarily need to be intelligent to be charming. maybe socially intelligent.
you can't be witty and be stupid.
you can't be a great artist or like good art if you're stupid.

There are different types of intelligence.

And I am 100% that someone who is witty, charming, artistic, and knowledgeable all at once is gonna be one badass intelligent person. especially if they aren't ignorant.

>>18102811
This is such an insignificant stupid thing idk why you wouldnt.

>>18102815
not really.

you're basically saying confidence has nothing to do intelligence.

confidence is entirely based upon intelligence and each person has a different level of general confidence.

they can be very under-confident or overly confident. both people are not very intelligent.

>>18102815
also, mind you, all i was saying that high confidence =/= good, always.

which is true lol.

>>18102820
>in other words, there's definitely someone out there for everyone.
Well, I wouldn't say that either. There are people who die alone, and not by their own choice. The fact remains that you have to be flexible to some degree, because there's not someone out there for everyone. You have to give and take a little bit, you have to settle a little bit. Your perfect person who will like you for who you are entirely (and that you like for who they are entirely) is statistically improbable.
So there is something to say about following trends and majorities, but only to a certain extent. Which is a small extent.

>>18102831
I stand by what I said.

Flexibility increases the range of individuals you can match with.

There are over 6 billion people on this earth.

6 billion.

I guarantee there is someone out there for everyone. The chances of meeting that someone for some people may be close to nil, but they're out there. And they both die alone. :')

Why are some girls so obsessed with height?

>>18102820
>>in other words, there's definitely someone out there for everyone.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aUgQPzq6ifc

>>18102820
>you can't be witty and be stupid.
>you can't be a great artist or like good art if you're stupid.
but you can be both of these things while being completely average when it comes to innate cognitive ability, mental capacity, problem solving or any other metric. The standard definition of intelligent wouldn't cover an aptitude for witticisms or art. Either the boring, artistically averse guy with 4 master degrees in science who develops AI for Google while teaching Calculus on the side is unintelligent or you need to use other words.

>>18102836
the best artists were geniuses in the way they perceived the world and/or the way they reflected upon it.

same for the wittiest.

>>18102835
well louie's a fucking cynic :')

fucking amazing bit tho

When would it be a proper time to tell someone I'm dating that I was a NEET for 5 years and barely left the house due to Social Anxiety Disorder?
I'm male and attending college (as a freshman) and I'm a completely different person now, but it would be a huge red flag if I told someone too soon, no?

>>18102835
"nobody fucks down" doubt that

so funny tho

Where the fuck do you look if you're out of college (23+) and want a serious relationship? Tinder seems to be people just looking for hook-ups/casual dates but OkC just seems kind of...sad

Work isn't an option because I tried dating a co-worker once and it went terribly, and I'm too introverted to just ""meet people""

Should I just suck up my prejudices and try OkC?

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Posted this in another thread but i want to read if the women would consider me the predatory exploitative d-bag in this situation.

Someone screencap this for the next guy who asks if he should move in with an ex.

>have oneitis for 13 years
>she gets married and starts a family after leaving me
>her husband eventually kicks her out of his house
>she couch surfs for two years
>i finally buy a house and ask her to move in with me
>everything is great for a couple of weeks
>she flirts and shows off her body a lot
>then she stops flirting
>then she moves her daughter in
>then she loses her job
>then she gets arrested on felony drug charges
>then she moves her unemployed father and brother in
>then she starts sleeping with her husband again IN. MY. HOUSE.
>then she moves back in with her husband amd sticks me with her father and brother
>mfw i got exactly what i deserved

Don't be a pathetic beta cuckold faggot like me

>>18102843
right now?

before you started dating would have been optimal.

sigh.

if you've climbed out of that hole then that's a good thing, green flag.

>>18102833
Yeah, but whats the point of having someone out there for everyone if it is basically impossible for you ever to be together. Maybe my dream guy is in Japan right now. I will never in my life ever meet him though. So what's the point? Outcome is still the same, we both die alone and miserable.

Some people will settle harder than others in exchange for not dying alone. This is why divorces happen so much anymore. People are settling too low and realizing they're not any more happy being with someone they dont like than dying alone.
There are 6 billion people on the planet, but even fewer when you subtract the infants and children out of the mix. And even fewer then when you subtract out all the people who are too old for you, or are of a sex/sexuality you aren't attracted to.
And even then, you will only ever even meet maybe 100k of them in your lifetime.

>>18102852
Well, I'm not dating anybody right now, I just don't want people to think I'm a lazy loony since they don't know me too well yet.

>>18102834
Same reason some dudes are so obsessed with big tits and ass.
Some people like certain physical traits. It is what it is.

>>18102799
I leave my messages on read all the time because I have shit to do. Sometimes I have time to read a message but not enough time to write a thought out response. as long as she responds well and doesn't use one word answers I wouldn't worry about it. But tinder makes it easy for women to flake so be prepared to cut your loses

>>18102839
What is the Google AI developer and math professor, anon?

Is he desirable to women despite only really being able to talk about subjects such as differential equations, recurrent neural networks, the Lisp family of programming languages and whatever weird, niche hobbies he might have? He never had or thought to make time to learn to be witty or charismatic or artistic, is he what you consider unintelligent, anon?

Is what he has not what women want?

>>18102854
just gotta grow and diversify your palette, like with food.

that's pretty much it. if you are incapable of doing that, then your chances of success are nil and your reproductive success (fuck me and my science background) are nil as well.

diversify that palette girl

>>18102848
>It went poorly once so I'll never do it again
Lose that attitude for starters.
Stop being introverted secondly, step out of that comfort zone or nobody can help you because you don't want to help yourself.

Thirdly, join interest groups and go out more. (which ties into, stop being so introverted)

>>18102843
Never tell anyone dumbass.

>>18102858
explain yourself

come as you are, as cobaine once said

straight up really good life advice. you will always be surrounded by people that can stand / understand you, and you will enjoy them all the more for it.

>>18102861
so you raise a valid point. and this kinda goes hand in hand with what i was saying here >>18102863

basically, gotta diversify yo intelligence too

the greater diversity you exhibit in your personality traits, the greater your chance of successfully meeting someone that will like you enough to be with you

>>18102851
I think you should have kicked the bitch out ages ago desu.

Nothing wrong with wanting to try and fix things up with an ex, but you need to know where the boundaries lie. And I would have NEVER let her move in with me unless I established a formal relationship beforehand.
Personally, you should have known though her personality if she's getting in legal trouble. You would have known she was a druggie and therefore not that trustworthy of a person.

I would have put my foot down the second she wanted to move anyone in other than maybe the daughter and said no. And I certainly wouldn't have held onto her family members when she moved out. They should have gone with her or worked out their own shit.

>>18102808
>>18102817
Oh wow, that's interesting. I would've thought girls would prefer learning spaces with as few men as possible- I never knew they would "compete" to get men if they get scarce, especially on a college campus of all places.

>>18102865
secrets are killers, anonyduder.

>>18102859
Well but there's no shame in having a gf with no tits or ass. Some girls seem to avoid shorter guys just because they feel that isn't "right" or whatever. Sounds stupid.

>>18102860
I'm pretty busy during the week so when she left me on read last sunday I didn't text her again until last night. It makes no sense to give me your number then ignore me lol. Games are too much these days

>>18102880
fuck games, anon. fuck that shit

>>18102863
I don't give a shit about reproduction. I don't plan on ever having kids. I just care about being in a happy relationship.
I can only settle so much before, as I said, you start to be unhappier in a bad relationship than you would have been single.
Some people have these mandatory things that they just cannot settle on. Some are harder than others.
Like I want a dominant dude. I just cannot waver on that. I cannot date a submissive dude, I will be unhappier dating a sub than I would be single. But, this seems to be a very high demand. Nothing I can do about it though. It's either be miserable in a bad relationship, be slightly less miserable single, or wait around forever for a dominant dude to take interest. You can only diversify your palette so far before it's no longer worth it.

Some people will die alone, unhappy. Some will die with someone, but also unhappy. Some will die alone happily, others will die with someone happily. These are the outcomes really. I'm gunning for the latter, because its the only option for me personally where I can die having a happy and successful life.

>>18102884
so basically change what i said from reproductive success to relationship success. same concept.

and yeah like i said people that only want one thing are gonna be lonely people. unless they find that one thing.

not even saying im different.

>>18102884
>>18102885
being picky is being safe :P

being alone is more acceptable than being angry 24/7

>>18102871
Let me tell you about my freshman year and the hell I went through.
I lived in a special dorm for education majors only, which as you can guess, were 90% women.
Well, it was 100% women for some time. Everything was calm the first month or so. Then 2 girls started a spat on twitter, and then immediately the entire dorm divided into Girl War I. You were on bitch 1's team, or bitch 2's. And if you so much as talked to a member on either team, the other would shun you. There was no way to be neutral like I wanted. Instead, I just got shunned by both sides for being "traitorous" even though I openly said I had no allegiance to any of these bitches.
THEN, a dude joined our major, and took up residence in the hall.
One. Single. Dude. Guy was not even that attractive, he was no stud, he was a dorky little thing. But my god, he was the catalyst for Girl War II. ANY chick who got his attention was HATED by the rest of them. If he talked to someone, all other girls started working on some form of sabotage to tear his attention away from her. Even girls who had boyfriends, nobody was allowed to talk to this dude because he was the only one and women hate seeing other women succeed in love or sex. It's just some weird thing.

Basically, when you get a bunch of women together, it's just fucking chaos. And when you throw men into the mix, it's even worse.
There was some article about some (now ex) feminists starting an all women company to try and prove a point that a female only work place would be super productive.
Low and behold, essentially everything I said above happened there too. They all attacked and tore each other apart. When the feminist CEO eventually had to bring in a temp worker dude to make up costs, they all started this war over him for his attention, and tore the company apart even more.
Chicks are just weird.

>>18102078
This isn't really directed to the opposite gender but I'm asking here anyway cause it has some relevance.

Is it truly racist to not date a certain race? I don't find members of [some ethnic group] attractive enough to date. Some are attractive, but regardless I'd never date them

>>18102878
Eh, same as some don't think there's any shame in having a short bf. And same as how there are dudes who will avoid chicks with small tits or ass like the plague.
Different folks different strokes. Its not stupid on either end. If you're attracted to something and want it, then you have the power to be picky if you want. But if you're too picky, you can't bitch about being alone longer.

Like, I won't date a dude that's shorter than me. I don't find it attractive, and I need to find my dude attractive. Granted, I'm 5'3. So nearly all dudes are taller than me anyway, it's not hard.
Alternatively, I don't take any offense to when dudes say I'm not attractive enough for them for whatever reason. That's just the way the cookie crumbles. Can't win em all.

>>18102897
nope.

i dont like mint chocolate chip ice cream. i don't hate people that make it. i dont go to stores and just take out all the mint chocolate chip and put it on the floor outside the freezer and let it melt so no one can have it or it doesnt exist. i dont write 'fuck mint chocolate chip' on the freezer glass.

its ok, anon.

>>18102870
Wow I did not expect this from 4chan. Thanks bro. This will make me feel much better if im forced to be an asshole soon. I fuckin' love you guys

>>18102885
yeah, but I'm also saying you can even be more flexible than just wanting "one thing" and still die alone. Unless you're flexible enough to somehow manage to be happy with literally anyone regardless of anything, then yeah, the possibility's still there and still much higher for some than others.

>>18102897
Nope. You like what you like. Nothing you can do about it.

>>18102904
if you only like a small bit of things in a person then you're gonna be alone.

lol why dont you take my words and think about them in a broader sense other than what im word-for-word writing on 4chan. cmon.

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>>18102902
>>18102902
That was a beautiful explanation. 10/10

>>18102912
I mean, its more I'm confused because we're saying the exact same things then but you're still trying to fight me lol.

I was just saying, the wider you can actually expand your pool, the easier you'll find a compromise that works. But not everyone physically can widen their pool that large, other's can do so easily though.

There will be people to die alone no matter what they do. Even if they do have a 100% open dating pool, they'll take the first person to show interest in them. Doesn't mean anyone will ever actually show interest in them. Is that likely? No, probably not. But still very much possible.

Having a happy, good relationship is not a given in life. And those who don't get that, it isn't always even really their fault. They can only change their standards so much.

>>18102872
Being or having been a neet loser is way worse.

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I think the root of my lack of confidence with women comes from disbelief at the prospect of them appreciating or caring about me. How do I fix my head?

>>18102930
im 100% not trying to fight anyone ever, in life, in any modality (internet/irl/whatever).

just gonna clear that up straight away. i think something in the language i use to communicate with people gives them that idea. i literally never have that intention lol im a super passive (i.e. non-confrontational) human being.

but yeah, so you're basically commenting on how relationships take two to work.

well... yeah. :')

it takes two to tango

>>18102933
hmmm maybe i dunno what a neet is

maybe it's like saying "i once raped killed and ate my children and wife"

>>18102947
"but i'm better now"

>>18102937
Seeing a professional and not /adv/?

>>18102894
I said the question because I read an article about UNC-Chapel Hill and the gender ratio there. Apparently, the more women there are, the more of a hookup culture exists and the more men there are, the more of a "courtship and romance" culture exists.

>>18102864
I *might* try dating a co-worker again but definitely not anytime soon. It's been a few months since the break up and it still hurts seeing him around so I don't really want to go through that again.

>Thirdly, join interest groups and go out more
I've joined a few groups for people in my age group but all their meetups just involve going out and drinking which, honestly, I'm just not that into doing on a regular basis. I don't mind socializing but I prefer low key activities (board games, movies, book groups) or outdoorsy stuff but all the groups doing that are 30+

>>18102951
Going to a therapist might actually ruin my life plans?

>>18102995
Didn't mean type the question mark

>>18102995
How.
You realize that shit is confidential right?

>>18102969
Hmm, idk anything about that. Wonder why it is. I can see it going one of two ways.
Women tend to seek casual sex more and when they're the majority they get their way.
Or men prefer casual sex more, but because the women are so few and competition is high, they have to settle/commit to get any sex at all.

Personally though, I'm not thinking the hook up culture has anything to really do with sexes. I think it's entirely to do with the age/generation.

At my school, we're pretty 50/50 and it's damn near impossible to date on either end. All women just want a casusal fuck. All men just want a casual fuck. None want to settle down. And for good reasons, college is so uncertain. You never know where you're gonna go after graduation. Why settle down then and risk breaking up when your job takes you to one end of the country, and theirs takes them to another, when you can just get some causal dick/pussy to sustain your sexual appetite for the time being and settle down when you're more settled yourself.

>>18102990
Well, if you don't want to try anything, then we can't help you.
There's more out there than you think, you just have to look for it.
And you might have to actually try things you've never done before to see if you'd like it, even if you don't /think/ you would.

>>18103000
I think the Air Force would want to know if a pilot candidate felt the need to seek professional help for their problems

>>18103000
ah yeah. military sure has some ignorant ass shit in the way they operate. :/

not surprising, though.

>>18103021
>>18103036
You should absolutely not be in the airforce if you are mentally unstable then.

There's a good reason for them being so intolerant on mental disorders, because it's literally dangerous to your fellow soldiers and the fate of the country.

You should probably find a better career more suited to your abilities.

4 years ago I broke up with my ex, in context I was 90% sure he was cheating on me and it was a ldr (I was naivé I know), he stopped talking to me 3 weeks before I "declared" it to be over, I haven't gotten a reply to this day. As if I was tossed for spending a year and a half with him.
From time to time it haunts me that this is still unresolved. I can't find any of his accounts (that I'm sure he as) online to see if he's dead or not. He always kept them very private.
I'm in a happy relationship now.

Is it normal to still want to get this shit resolved or to try and see if that fucker has a miserable life or not?

>>18103043
i mean i kinda believe that killing for a country inherently requires blind patriotism (there is no country worth killing/dying for), and therefore requires mental instability.

but that's a conversation for another age of time, people dont seem to get that atm.

become an airline pilot! see the world.

or teach flying.

>>18103054
Agreed, but insecurity of any kind is not a good trait for a killer. Good soldiers are beaming with confidence in their actions. If they freeze up around women, they ain't gonna make a good soldier.

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>>18103054
>(there is no country worth killing/dying for)

>only 1 reply
>no girl on /adv/ puts anything in their ass

>>18102779
Pussy juices are OK for me, but assholes... I'll never even fuck a girl's asshole without condom.

>>18103043
I really can't come up with a better way to apply myself. It suits basically all of my talents and the better balance side of my personality better than anything els

>>18103087
Well I mean, one could argue you must not care too much about cleanliness if you're gonna be putting you dick, even covered, in someone's asshole. You gonna get shit particles on yourself one way or another.

>>18103072
yep, every country's government has done, currently does, and will do terrible things.

>>18103071
true

>>18103090
I'd start looking then, because it clearly isn't suiting your personality if you have to try and hide your mental illness to get in.

>>18103054
Finns might object heavily on your statement.

Hey girls, why does my dick hurt?

>>18103097
haha true. I need to learn more about finland, everything i've heard is amazing

>>18103091
But I'm minimizing it as much as possible and making it easy to clean. Would you like getting shit smeared all over your body?

>>18103133
Nope. but that's why I dont do butt stuff of any kind. Because it's gross and unsanitary lol.
Why don't you just fuck her in the pussy?

>>18103099
Stop fapping for a while.

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Why do I feel shame when I hear people criticizing other people or groups? It doesn't even need to be groups I'm a part of or people who resemble me. It's like I hear any criticism and I apply to myself. Why do I do this?

>>18103147
I do, but sometimes (rarely) I want to fuck the asshole, for variety.

When she dresses in front of you (knowing you're not gay), is that a sign your miles in the friendzone or that she likes you?

>>18103201

Could be either really. Make a move to find out for sure.

>>18102078
question to guise: are your peenuses also weenuses?

Hi
I'm a 20yo male and in a heterosexual relationship. She's suicidal and suffers from depression. I have porn induced and anxiety ED. The only time that she feels like living is when we have sex, but that can be difficult. I can never cum anymore because she will always cum first and then dry up before I can ejaculate, I might have times where I can't keep my erection up during also. But she jumps to the conclusion that it's her and not my health. She feels ugly and unwanted, but those are the moments where I want her most and should show her how beautiful she is. Please help me.

Im friends with shy kinda nerdy girl since high school. She is hard to reach but we texted a lot and realized we like each other enough to meet each other one on one irl after high school ended. How slowly does romantic relationships develop in those conditions? Have anyone been in same situation and may have some insight? Im rather clueless in dating and she is much more clueless than me. Also we have very similiar perspectives on life

>>18103167
Eh, then you gonna get a lil dirty. Its all good man, lil poop particles don't really hurt anyone. They're everywhere.

>>18103237
You both need to go to a therapist, better get a professional to properly help you, it can make things much easier - dont be ashamed of it, lots of people look for therapies nowadays. It is also normal to have erection problems when you are in a big stress, so getting to the source of it can be helpful in a therapy. As for her selfesteem do some spontaneous nice things to her and let her know how much she means to you, well timed complements and other gestures can work wonders. I wish you both the best.

>>18103220
My genitals are a deadly weapon

>>18103237
Get some lube and/or shove it in her mouth

>>18103237
slap her around a bit

Girls

What do you think of guys who decide to stay away from women?

Examples of this would be herbivore men in Japan and MGTOW.

>>18103299

I think it's pretty silly to blame so many problems on women as a whole, and miss out on relationships. I'm not saying there aren't a lot of shitty women, but it's not like MGTOW are foregoing the temptations of the flesh to solve humanity's problems. They just got pissed and decided they didn't want to play with girls.

A good relationship really is like having a best of best friends. The fact that their sexism keeps them from seeing that is very sad.

Personal angle: I was raped and beaten by a man who controlled me for years. The direct effects (racking up debt in my name, permanent nerve damage, years of mental illness, etc) are equal to or greater than the "harm" that will come to the average man at the hands of a woman. Yet I continued to date, found a man who is my best friend, and am very happy now.

MGTOW types are not only blindly sexist in their assumptions that women are stupid/malicious/etc, but also in that way where they seem to forget the shit some men do to women.

Girls

When is it acceptable to double text?

>>18103371
I guess I should have said why I am asking.

I messaged a girl with the intent of coming clean with how I feel. But I didn't get an opportunity to do so.

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How do I steal another guys gf?

>>18103382
Rope, duct tape, van, and a lawyer who will make the 16 hours of pleasure worth 10 years in prison.

what's a good way to meet girls?

Hey ladies

Why do women get very frustrated and angry at ugly guys that pretend they don't even exist. They complain that the very same men are creeps but the few times you see a fat/ugly dude give no genuine fucks about a pretty women in the place and you can even see the pure anger in their faces when they get the hint.

>>18103425
because we're secretly super wet for guys like that

if a guy like that talked to me I'd take his entire dick up my in ass in no time

Does this sound like an acceptable, relatively non-cringey way to come clean with a girl?

"There's something that I've been meaning to say. I'm sure you probably already realized, but I really like you. Hopefully we can remain friends if you don't feel the same. I honestly just wanted to get this off my chest."

>>18103425

Guy here. I know this feel too well.

Learned from experience best keeping my head down and mouth shut. Don't speak until spoken too.

Seriously, I get called "creepy" if I actually try or show literally any sort of affection, even if it's just asking them if they are seeing someone.

But the moment I mind my own business and stop tripping over myself to impress some lard-arse who talks about how her body is a fucking temple and how all men are evil and creepy, all fucking hell breaks loose. Am I gay? A virgin? What the fucks wrong with me?

Nah, cunts. Took your decades old advice and noticed your personalities instead of your looks. Holy shit it was even worse, why'd you bother pointing that shit out?

Seriously, a friend showed me a text from this purple-hair (that's how you know she's a lost cause) basically saying she found it creepy that I didn't try to hit on her.

She was married, overweight, with kids, twice my age, and had fucking purple hair. She was also cheating on her husband with my friend (and still expected me to hit on her).

My theory about these women is this;
They just need shit to complain about. Fuck all you can do to please them.
But if you mind your own business, 9 times out of 10 you don't have to hear that load of bollocks.

Guy here. Should I shave my pubes? Do girls generally prefer/expect the guys they're with to be shaved, or is it more common for guys to not be shaved? Is my thinking that it's more common to be shaved a product of watching too much porn, or is it actually more common that other guys shave?

Is it "okay" to make period jokes with girls?

I was gonna make one involving my male friend to an unrelated female friend but I have no idea if that's taboo or whatnot.

>>18103673

Guy here.

I wouldn't. Generally if you have to ask, it's best to be cautious.

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>>18103685
She posted this pic, I was going to say something along the lines of
>hyper matches my friend an awful lot, sans the scant menstrual periods, oughta tell him to get checked

>>18103696
kek that's a terrible idea
you should totally do it

I'm going on a first date with the purest little thing. She's a sheltered 18 year-old churchgoing girl whom I've been best friends with for months. I'm a guy in his early 20s who posts here, which kind of really makes it clear what she's up against.

How do I go about this? The contrast isn't exactly something to point out

>>18103712
Firstly, I'm gonna need to know what boards you frequently browse so that I can gauge just how much of a degenerate you are

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>>18103703
In hindsight I think it'd be too devilish and the moment is kinda gone now.

>>18103433
Is your goal to "come clean" or to date her? Because you will have no chance of dating her saying something like that

>>18103382
You don't. It's never worth it.

>>18103739
Well, mostly to come clean at this point.

Eh, its been sent like 30 min ago

>>18103425
LOL because your sad attempt at sarcasm and humour is not going to mask your genetic inferiority. You uglies are being annoying and no one male or female wants to put up with irritating people with severe autism.

>>18103767
I do, otherwise I wouldn't be replying to you.

>>18103087
>>18102459
>>18102275
Why would you expect girls to put have things in their asses or played with their assholes?

>>18103773
Fuck off you are UGLY.

>>18103791
I know you are but what am I?

>>18103778
because some of them do.
I have had anal with two of them myself.
Is there really anything strange about it?

Also, I'm this guy
>>18102275
Pretty sure the other one is a common troll

>>18103767
You seem not to understand what the fuck I posted. In my recent job that I've been at for 6 or so months, I don't even talk or acknowledge or even say hi to any of the few women in the office, I don't even know the names of any of them

And yet instead of going in with their lives, you can see the very visible butthurt going on around Thier face. I generally love getting my morning coffee and just seeing through them whenever they stand around waiting for me to say something to them.

I've got a decent amount of body hair should I shave my balls and stuff? And if so should I leave some hair? Got a great girl atm with a lot more sexual experience than me and just don't want to be a disappointment visually...

>>18102681
The most base thing would be masculinity/testosterone.

You could also throw in things like health, virility, and providing resources. All of these traits are manifested in many different ways, physically and psychologically, including all of those being argued about ITT, such as intelligence, confidence, wit, self control, aggression and power. Learn more about human evolutionary biology/ psychology. It's very interesting. I reccomend Gad Saad.

Right, done some grafting and got her number, is it really as simple as texting her and saying 'hey, you want to grab a drink this week'?

>>18103673
No because it's immature.

>>18103778
That's not the point of the question.

>>18103797
How am I a troll? It is a valid question.

>>18103810
>>18103696 is what I was more or less going to say, if context changes your mind.

but yeah it is pretty immature I guess.

>>18103805
>Gad Saad.
Should I trust a person with a rhyming name?

What do I talk about when I approach a woman?

I have no clue how to have a conversation with a stranger, let alone a female

>>18103820
>How am I a troll?
if you truly don't understand this, let me just tell you you sound childish. Mostly by blindly assuming that most of a billion of people do what a couple of the people you know did.

>>18103800
Well these specifics about this issue occurring in an office environment was not even mentioned until now. If it's a workplace conflict and there is a problem with you being fat/ugly because of your ignorant behaviour such as disregarding others based on their gender then maybe you should acknowledge the fact that being rude has it's consequences.
You said you were fat/ugly and based on your actions you've portrayed yourself as the stereotypical lazy slob with very poor social awareness.

Guy here. So apparently I am dating a workaholic. Yall have probably seen my story a few times.

>4 great dates with girl each being better than before (ended with heavy kissing and groping)
>she tells me she is gonna be busy
>says gonna be free monday
>call and she says she has to work "ok"
>says she will be free next saturday
>call friday and we talk for a bit
>says she is still free tomorrow
>call her up sat and tell we should see a movie and she says "im feeling bad and tired but monday night for sure!"
>"sure"
>actually see her at work on sunday
>we happened to finish at the same time
>walk her back to her car
>she grabs my arm and holds onto me tightly
>ask what time she wants to see the movie
>says "im not sure gonna have to talk to my boss"
>me "aw lawd here we go again"
>her "you just gotta accept that im a workaholic"
>get to car
>she gives me a hug and a kiss on cheek
>tell her to give me a real kiss
>kisses me on lips
>she asks for another
>kiss two more times with another big hug and say goodnight


I'm so fucking confused. Am I just being insecure?

>>18102078
>Ask them out

Worst. Advice. Ever.
Do NOT 'just ask them out'. For several reasons.

1, Especially if its a co-worker, co-ed situation that you dont want to become awkward, the worst thing you could do is ask them out.

2, Out? out where, to do what. People don't "go out" now. It's old-fashioned. Ask for a phone number or facebook details, if anything.

3, There are many, many other and different ways to tell if someone fancies you.
To be honest, they will make it fairly obvious. If they are being very cryptic, they are not worth it.

Do not "just ask them out". Totally useless advice.

>>18103797
Most girls who do anything anal only do it in the context of doing it with/ to please a guy. Nothing wrong or bad about that at all. I'm just saying it's unrealistic to expect many girls to have been drawn to anal play purely alone and by themselves for themselves. Poop comes from there, and girls don't even have prostates to at least makeup for it.

>>18103833
>assuming
I'm telling you all my IMPRESSION and making a question to the girls here. Is this difficult to understand?
I've never even IMPLIED that girls are all pigs who don't wash their hands.

Guy here. Should I apologize to a female co worker after basically ignoring her after she says thank you for helping a customer put items in their car?

>>18103849
>Ask for a phone number or facebook details,
That's so you can ask them out on a date.

>>18103822
The real question is should you doubt someone with a rhyming name?

>>18103856
If it was big yes but if it wasn't a big deal just remember to say you're welcome/no problem or whatever in the future.

>>18103853
it may still feel fantastic to have something put there, prostste or not. I never said anything about it being common or not. But I assure you there are tons of them, even if it contributed to overally little percent of all females.
And no, they don't do it mostly to please a guy. The ones I did it with consented and even proposed it before me.
That you don't like it doesn't mean the others don't

>>18103820
>That's not the point of the question.

But then you said>>18103087
>only 1 reply
>no girl on /adv/ puts anything in their ass

You're talking about girls using dildos in their asses right? That's not going to be that common.

>>18103854
yet you feel an urge to add your strong opinion to the post where it actually doesn't even matter.
No more (you)'s matey, so appreciate this one

>>18103743
shes qt, and he treats her bad.
I wouldn't bother if they were a happy couple

i want to steal her without forcing it

>>18103865
>it may still feel fantastic to have something put there, prostste or not.
Yes it might, but usually not enough to make many women curious and attracted enough want to explore it by themselves.
>I never said anything about it being common or not. But I assure you there are tons of them, even if it contributed to overally little percent of all females.
Yes I agree, but don't expect many replies.

>And no, they don't do it mostly to please a guy. The ones I did it with consented and even proposed it before me.
You ignored the WITH guys part. Many women who are into anal are into it WITH guys but aren't interested in doing it on their own. There is usually a big psychological aspect of anal sex that doesn't come with masturbating. You could even say the same about vaginal sex to a lesser extent.
>That you don't like it doesn't mean the others don't
>implying I don't love anal

>>18103881
so you started the whole argument with me only to inform me I won't be getting many replies?

Good job, thank you for this valuable information I couldn't get otherwise.
I really appreciate it, anon

>>18103871
If you're rescuing her now from her bf sooner or later someone will come along to rescue her from you

>>18103299
Literally degenerate as in it's bad for families and bad for society as a whole.

I can't be friends with other girls because I'm honestly afraid of them stealing my boyfriend. There is no chance of this with male friends.

How unhealthy is this? Do any other girls feel that way?

>>18103246
Sounds exactly like my guys and me. Nerds, met in high school, became best friends, have talked all day every day for the past five years and share very similar values, goals, beliefs, and perspectives. We became a couple after we graduated high school and have been happily together for three years now.

It's a very good foundation for a relationship in my opinion. Keep talking and hanging out, get closer, ask her out.

>>18103886
Yes exactly, especially since both of you replied again asking why you weren't getting more replies.

>>18103871
She dates abusive assholes AND can be stolen by other guys? Sounds like a real catch.

>>18103917
no, I didn't. I simply bumped it, for it was posted for like two hours already and nobody's going to answer this old questions here, assuming the one who asked left long ago.

Oh, and by the way
>>18103778
in the first post you said nothing about numbers or quantities, which you claimed to have done later. You're just pulling the arguments of your ass.

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anyone

How do I stop being insecure about something I have no control over?
For the most part, I've completely moved on from shit that had bothered me in my teens, but there's one that just doesn't seem to go away. What's bad is that I know it's really not even that big of a deal, but it still bothers me.
How can I just stop caring about this last petty insecurity?

>>18102851
Jesus dude.

Kill everyone in the house before yourself please.

>>18102884
Everybody dies alone.

>>18103905
You seem a little paranoid desu.

>>18103936
Well I hope you get more responses anon but I doubt you will

>>18103997
When people say they don't want to die alone, they really mean they don't want to die lonely.

Girls, if you lost interest in a guy, how would he be able to get it back or should he just give up on you?

>>18104078
Give up.
If she is going to change her mind, it's gonna be on her own accord. You changing yourself or doing something desperate to change her mind is just gonna turn her off further.

>>18103905
kek yea this is incredibly unhealthy, but this is essentially how all women work. We're all competitive little shits especially when it comes to men.

My own best friend 180's her personality when her bf is around to make it very obvious she's claiming her territory, even though we've been friends since childhood and she knows I have zero interest in her man. (Actually, he's my sloppy seconds so she can keep him, I dumped him for a reason).
But even still, after 4 years she still has to make sure she makes a serious claim to him for all women to see, because we know how we work.

>>18103856
I don't really see that as a big deal 2bh. Typically "your welcome's" are implied.

>>18104111
*fucking e key sticks.
*youre welcome

before the grammar nazis bust in and shit themselves over it

Both genders
Is trimming your pubes with scissors acceptable?

>>18104119
I hope so lol because that's all I can do.

I accept it on dudes just fine though. But that's because I understand the struggle of hair removal. So long as it's not like, a 70s fro going on down there I don't care.

>>18104061
But everybody dies lonely.

>>18104139
My grandmother didn't die lonely. She died surrounded by friends and family, and her adoring husband.

Guys and girls, would it be weird to ask out a random girl I see occasionally at school? Are there any guys that have done this?

>>18104211
If you've never had any significant conversation, it's the same as a cold approach anywhere else. It's got a super high fail rate. You gotta find something you have in common, use that to break the ice.

>>18103845
If you don't like it, tell her or ditch her.
When she asks why, you already have a reason. Granted, don't instantly assume you can be more important than the job this early, but do express being made to feel in second place. If she's not available, she's not available, no need for her to constantly bring up her job unless that's her way of telling you that her job is the number one priority.
Because that's what everyone wants to hear in a relationship: you are second place until you earn first.

>>18104222
Well, I could use sports, but I'm not entirely sure if she even supports the team or is just wearing that for fun. Have you personally done this yourself?

>>18103849
Agree, that's overly general advice, but it's to discourage the 80% of questions that can be answered with that. Generally people are remarkably vague or details are massaged.

>>18103871
see
>>18103890

>>18103963
Name that demon. Since you obviously want us to ask. And it's obvious because it's an anonymous image board. If you can't define the issue here, then you're full of shit about it being insignificant (to you).

>>18104234
eh, if she's wearing something she has no interest in, that's kinda weird. So I say go for it.

And yes, I've commented on dude's game/tv show tshirts all the time. "Oh sweet walking dead tshirt! Are you caught up? What do you think of this season?"
Shit like that. Strikes up conversation naturally. Next time I see them, use that similar interest to start the conversation, "Catch this week's episode?" and try to work in other topics gradually "Oh if you watch twd, do you watch supernatural too?", etc. Eventually you start to know a little more than just that one thing about them, in my example, his interest for twd, in your case, her interest for sports. Once you have a handful of things you might have in common, you can work in the invite to hang out.

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Women:
I'm now in my third consecutive relationship that has followed these similar circumstances. Keep a woman at arm's length (as in almost friends at most), because I'm not interested. Then, months later, somehow end up alone and she dumps her emotional baggage/stress all over me (first one had an ex commit suicide after she left the country, second lost her father and job same week, the new one is stressed with school and her parents financial situation because of an accident she was in). Then, her attitude towards me completely changes to unbound affection. Insert a generally okay relationship.
What the fuck could I be doing that makes women do this around me? I stay pretty closed off and am called a jerk quite a bit. If it's a question of trust, I don't see how they are getting to that point with me prior to these events. These women also seem to have it together. Until they unload on me.

Not sure what im asking here buuut me and my gf have been together for 10 months now and we havent had sex since october. We had an active sex life with lots of expirmentation. Then she went off to school in septemeber and we only had sex when id see her on weekends. Then every other weekend. Then nothing. Ive tried to talk to her about it ut she would just get mad and upset saying she doesnt know what to do or why she has no interest in sex anymore. I said ok, and done my best to support her. Eventually i just never brought it up whatever. But recently since shes been done school and is home she has been expressing interest is trying to have sex again and talk about it again etc. I just wanna know. What the fuck?

>>18104271
I see, thanks.
Now I have to wait for the day she wears that again, lol.

Male here, what am i supposed to do when a girl says "i don't want to ruin our friendship" after i confess?

>>18104470
Whatever you want

>>18104311
Talk to her again

>>18104472
Funny :)

>>18104477
I didn't make a joke

>>18104311
Is she on the pill? I lost my libido for months when I went on it. Any form of hormonal birth control fucks you up.

Lady anon's be honest

You could have all of the money in the world, OR the most beautiful and ultra smart child, what would You chose?

>>18104494
The money. I don't want kids. Honestly, I'd rather all the knowledge in the world, or like, the creative ability to make something great to stand through the ages, or change the world for the better in some way (set up a charity or invent something game changing). Neither kids nor money matter much to me, personally.

>>18104494
Having all the money in the world is going to fuck up the economy, so I'll go with the latter. If it was something more 'realistic' like a million dollars, then I'd pick that because I don't care about my child being the best of the best. Plus, imagine the ego that kid would have.

Guys and girls: Is it unhealthy for me to just be in love with the same person for the rest of my life, even though we're not together, and not seek out other people? I feel almost neckbeardy. I got drunk and declared to my friend that I'd always be in love with this guy, and I don't care if it's not him, when she asked me why I was single.

He basically gave me a reason to live, pulled me out of some dark times, and we keep in sporadic touch. There were feelings involved with both sides. I haven't seen him in a few years and I don't stalk him on social media or anything. I'm going to make the trip to see him after I graduate.

Maybe I'm putting him on a pedestal. I do try and meet other people, and busy myself with my own hobbies. People are nice but I'm just not interested. i feel like it's alright if I never get married, and actually I'd also be happy for him if he finds someone else.

But i also feel like this is too much and maybe a stupid thing to do?

>>18104109
So you got with your friend's crush and dumped him when you tortured her enough? You're one sick fuck. This is why having female friends is awful.

>>18104550
I'm the same way famygdala, though I don't have a reason like you do beyond 'she's the only girl I enjoyed spending time with'

I feel like it's a copout that lets me be lazy, but honestly I've never met any other woman who wasn't just an annoyance. (The same goes for men, I have 2 male friends who I legitimately like, the rest are basically garbage I put up with for the sake of social appearances)

We're probably not too similar in our reasoning, but I think it's only 'unhealthy' if the result is you being unhappy.

Still, the fact that you have doubts should be examined. Do you feel like you're acting against your own self interest? Or is your doubt just the result of society screeching 'MARRY AND REPRODUCE, NO DEVIATIONS FROM THE NORM ALLOWED' constantly?

How do I stop feeling insecure while approaching, meeting and being in a relationship with people?

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Guys:
If I decide to get a tattoo on my foot should it be on the inside ( on the side of my big toe) or the other side.. I don't really want it on the top of my foot I don't think it would look right.

>>18104861
both options seem pretty terrible

>>18104470
don't ruin your friendship. Duh

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I met this girl some weeks ago.
We had a great connection and were flirting all night, but logistics made anything else impossible.

This weekend I bumped into her randomly. We danced and made out for hours at the club but I couldn't for the life of me get her away from her friends. Said she didn't want to ditch them. She asked several times for my number, I reluctantly gave it to her, but as I assumed, she isn't calling or texting. During the night she responded very well to me feeling her up and dancing dirty. She was touching my pecs and abs alot and I could see she was getting turned on by my body (I've been on /fit/ alot lately).
Girls, why work hard to get a number just to never use it, is she just baiting?

I mean, I could get very interested in this girl, but I'm getting the feeling that she's just baiting for commitment and shit before sex.
She's very pretty and very aware of that, but she lacks strong men in her life. She has a million "boys" trying to get her into relationship and such.
That's where I stand out, I'm not falling for her bait, I'm not gonna chase. What is the smart play here?
I really want to get her into bed and start seeing her, but I don't think making contact and inviting her on a date is the way to go.

Any advice is appreciated.

>>18104861
Honestly feet tatoos sound awful, but I'd say inside if you're gonna get one.

>>18104893
Where should I put it then?

>>18102078
how do i ask a girl out who never had a boyfriend ?

>>18102428
git gud

>>18102681
masculinity, capability, sense of humor, & some degree of "emotional intelligence"

>>18102861
>What is the Google AI developer
a colossal faggot

>>18102897
yes of course it is, everything is racist

>>18103048
yep. is normal. humans are curious af and we liek closure. we're not owed it and we may never get it in some cases, which sucks, but hey there are worse things

>>18103072
ikr

>>18103099
needs checked

>>18103165
do you minimize your own accomplishments?

>>18103299
somewhere between justified and gave up too easily

>>18103425
because a yuge portion of us are straight up entitled assholes these days

>>18103475
>>18103802
just make it so she's not gonna be flossing with pubes when she blows you and you're good

>>18103673
depends how uptight they are

>>18103800
>being this passive aggressive and catty
you, not them

>>18103821
immaturity is best maturity m8

>>18103832
ask them a question about themselves, listen to their answer, respond with your thoughts to it, offer up some remarks about yourself that are relevant, ask another question whenever there's a lull to get the conversation jumpstarted again. open-ended "what are your thoughts on x?" questions invite moar substantial responses than yes/no "do you like x?" questions. youtube can be helpful for this, might try a search on there

>>18103905
pretty damn unhealthy, git gud so it can stop even being a concern

>>18103963
ask yourself why it bothers you, then ask why that matters, then when you fail to come up with reasonable explanation you ask yourself again why you give a shit

>>18104308
you're inadvertently playing hard to get and you give off an air of strength and steadiness

>>18104913
if you aren't sure don't get it yet

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Girl here, currently I'm abroad in an exchange program. I met this guy (also an exchange student) and briefly talked for a while and we got along, didn't exchange contacts or anything. Few days later he adds me on fb and has talked to me once, also liked my profile picture. Do you think he's interested or something? It confuses me because we are from different countries and staying here just for a few months so there's not much chance of escalating, not sure what he wants? just being friendly? I'm socially retarded

>>18104494
Money, I personally don't want children

>>18104928
He wants a fling that lasts for the exchange period.

>>18104919
>git gud
10/10 advice

I have a problem. Since a few months I have been "low key" developing a crush on my boyfriend's friend, whom I see quite often. I love my bf and our relationship and I don't want to leave him for anyone, including this guy - but it has been the longest relationship I've ever had (over a year, I know it's not that long for most people but it is for me) and I think it's the perspective of a change that fuels my crush. I don't even like the other guy, we barely talk, I don't find him more physically attractive than my bf and we almost certainly wouldn't have a good relationship if we got together (also I've heard from a friend who slept with him that he's bad at sex); to make things worse, he's often telling annoying harmful jokes which I dislike. The things I like about the guy are: his interesting ~backstory, the way he tries to seem like he's tough but is not always succeeding (I enjoy weaknesses in people lol) and the way he's nice to me when we actually talk, although it doesn't go further than being nice/polite. He's quite rude to girls he knows better. I've also heard from a friend that he tells rude jokes about most women we know, including me (behind my back).

As you can see, my crush is quite irrational, and probably inspired by the stupid line of thinking "he's bad to other women, but for me he would change". (He also has a girlfriend whom he treats okay I think; I don't know the girl personally.) It manifests itself mostly in me wanting to look good when I know I'll see that guy (putting more effort into makeup / what I'm wearing) and an occasional dream - not even a sex dream, more like talking/flirting dream lol. I would really like to get rid of these feelings - now I'm trying to ignore them but I'm afraid this might make them stronger. What's the way to deal with them? I thought about talking to the guy more so I convince myself that he's really not worth of my interest, but I'm afraid we might actually become closer (although it's unlikely).

>>18103299
To each his own. I stay away from men because I don't think I can make our interests match, but I don't blame them for it or expect anything from them. Now if he was one of those extremists, sexist red pillers I'd think he's resented and generalizing.

>>18104931
>>>18104928
>He wants a fling that lasts for the exchange period.

You think so? Hmm I think I was being too naive then.

What happens when I die and my family finds the brothel's number on call history and prostitutes on contacts?

Is clubbing a good third date?

>>18104488
She is, but shes been on the pill, same brand for years before we met.

What are some ways to appear masculine beside confidence?

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A girl I know might be stringing me along. What are the clues, what should I do? Also I hear her toxic remarks about me all the time and at some point it becomes obnoxious.

>>18105152
When it comes to your appearance: beard, muscles, posture, clothes (simple, well-fitting, darker shades).
Talk with a calm/deep tone of voice, look at people in the eyes.
Be dominant in the conversation, voice your opinions, don't be scared but be polite. Be calm, don't be overwhelmed by your emotions, don't panic.

Girls, do not start any conversation with a guy on phone is a sign of disinterest or do you expect him to always send the first message?

To give some background, we hooked up about 2 weeks ago, last thursday we've talked and I proposed a date, she promptly accepted but on the day she sent me a message telling that she was not passing very well and could not go To the date, i know that she was telling the truth cause i've seen her with her dad on college (apparently her dad drove her to the class). We agreed to set another date, but since then we did not talk and I do not want to sound like to wake up by inviting her to hang out again.

>>18105182
For me, yes. But there are many girls who expect the guy to text first.
In general, if they texted me last I text first and I expect them to do the same.

Girls are divided nowadays. Some like to be treated like shit, because 'nice guys are boring'. Others like 'men with some class' and in opposition to other group, will get mad if mistreated.

This situation can make autistic basement dwellers such as myself fucking sick. How do I recognise what encountered girl wants?

>>18105193
You act like yourself

>>18105193
all women want to get handled by glking chands before settling for the STEM bitchboi

never fall for the "preference" meme

>>18105149
I don't think you should date people who go clubbing at all, but that's me.

>>18102352
He literally admitted to it. Are you autistic ?

>>18105192
I'm kinda expecting that too, she send me a text on the day that we hooked up, some days later i talked to her and invite her to a date and now i'm waiting for her to propose another date or just send me a "hi" for a couple days. I think i'm just gonna forget her anyways.

>>18105200

That's what I thought so myself, before I found a girl who rejected me for being too much of an asshole and who regularly dates nice guys who always do what she wants.

>>18105208

>asshole

see? You are doing it again. Correlating outcome with personality traits

If you were goodlooking, you wouldnt even have to talk for her to jump on your cock.

Enjoy your PUA tier trash, le being an assholeee!! xD and "chasing" women

>>18105211

Fuck you. I came here for advices, not your second rate offences. If you offer none, you can go suck my dick, pretty boy.

>>18105168
Bump. Anyone?

Girls and guys

Anyone else feel like they can't accept of experience affection/intimacy?

How do you help your lover if he has PTSD?

He told me his problems and we cried together and I held his hand throughout it, but I want to do more for him.

He suffers a lot from it and I worry for him

>>18105312
Give him the number of a good therapist.

To shy and insecure girls

If you would met a guy you get along with great, he touches you and such would it be possible for you to think he is just friendly cause you knew him only as rather distant friend for sone time? Like both of you wouldnt be aware of the fact that you really get together

>>18105344
He said he went to several and one of them even insulted him about it.

Plus he's broke

Well, I may as well be done with her now?

"Well I really appreciate your honesty. I'm just so focused on myself and what I'm doing with my life, I don't have the time to pursue anything with anyone"


(For what its worth I sorta already knew that she was focusing heavily on her self)

>>18105364
Do not take care of people with an untreated mental illness if you are their romantic partner.
It literally destroys your relationship with them.
Help him financially if possible, try to make him find someone who can help him, but do not try to save them from themselves.

>>18105240
Take a step back and look at what you put in vs what she puts in. Time, effort, energy, attention, warmth. Does she ask you questions? Listen to you? Remember what you said? Check up on your issues?

Or does she only talk to you when she feels like it and only rants about her own issues? Does she talk over you a lot, doesn't seem to be curious about your life in turn? Does she ask you for favors a lot?

Alternatively, flaking without stepping up. Yeah life happens and sometimes you can't make it, even last minute or twice in a row. What any sane person who is interested then proceeds to do is go out of their way to make it clear that this does not indicate disinterest. "Let me make it up to you, I'm free any night next week."

>>18105283
Yeah I'm pretty stunted. Not internally but with expressing it and making myself vulnerable. Can't really give you specific advice given that you provided no context but I bet it has a lot to do with how you grew up (it does for me) and you need to come to terms with that and recognize your own patterns of avoidant behavior.

>>18105312
Like the other anon said this is sadly something too serious to fix for someone else. You can be there for him (and let him show you how you can optimally achieve that, what he feels most consoled by etc), try to help him find distraction, be someone he can vent to or shut down around... but in the end there's only so much you can do as a partner, the brunt will always be on him.

>>18105345
Can definitely happen. It wouldn't happen so quickly to me now, but when I was younger and less experienced absolutely. I'd analyze every little detail separately instead of paying attention to the bigger picture. Plus insecurity makes it easy to underestimate the chance that someone's into you.

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Girls

So I've been texting with this girl for about a month now. She's a nice friend, we have good conversations and they are pretty playful too. Nothing sexuall tho of course. Anyways, she made an assumption that I had a girlfriend, so when I told her I didn't she said "ohh ahaha well your past girlfriend probably misses you ;) " then I told her I've never had a girlfriend before and her only reply was pic related.

What does that mean? I never replied

>>18105385
Yes. Could be an excuse, could be sincere, but the bottom line is that if you felt like her potential soulmate she'd find a way, and apparently she is not intrigued enough to make you more of a priority. Find someone who will make you a priority.

>>18105399
Dude, she is BLATANTLY flirting with you here. Get a grip.

I'll translate what she said:

>I want to know whether he has a girlfriend so I'll make a comment concerning his "girlfriend" for him to potentially correct me
>great, he doesn't have a girlfriend, let's compliment him and make it obvious that I find him a desirable guy
>how is it possible that someone this cute never dated anyone, express that I can't see how that happened

...

>why does he not reply to me...?

>>18105407
>>18105399
Also forgot to include but just tell her something like "I know, crazy stuff huh ;)", or even something about how you couldn't pick one or whatever, and flirt back for fuck's sake.

>>18105398
>Can definitely happen. It wouldn't happen so quickly to me now, but when I was younger and less experienced absolutely. I'd analyze every little detail separately instead of paying attention to the bigger picture. Plus insecurity makes it easy to underestimate the chance that someone's into you.happen so quickly to me now, but when I was younger and less experienced absolutely. I'd analyze every little detail separately instead of paying attention to the bigger picture. Plus insecurity makes it easy to underestimate the chance that someone's into you.

So what should I do in situation like this? Be more blunt? I dont want to put too much pressure on her

>>18105407
>>18105411

Well shit.


I like this girl, but I don't want to go down this road. I don't think it's a good idea

>>18105403
I'll still keep in contact as a friend, as well, I honestly value her even as that.

Though she did seem to signal a little bit of being interested in the past. So it could be sincere.

I'll still focus on other girls though, but still leave it open if she ever decides to do anything with me.

Girls-
So this girl I have been dating I haven't seen her in like 2 weeks since we made out. Saw her last night and she gave me a hug a kissed me on the cheek. I told her I wanted a real kiss. So I kissed her on the lips and she asked for another and I kissed her two more times.


Is she still interested in me? I ask this because in the past two weeks she hasn't had time for me.

girls: does being a tall guy count for anything if you dont have much mussel?

im trying to decide whether i should bother going gym.

also how attractive is it to a girl to have big mussels?

>>18105417
Stop trying to hint, ask her out on a date. It is actually more awkward having to discourage a guy non-verbally when he is pressuring you than flat out saying no to a stated offer. Take the leap.

>>18105419
Why so?

>>18105429
We went out few times but I never called it date cause like i said I dont want to pressure her.

>>18105429

>why so?

Because I have a problem with receiving affection. So if this progresses even tho I like her, I'll end up pushing her away.

>>18105422
It's your choice but imo you should only do it if you're 100% convinced that you won't mind potentially seeing her date someone else a few months down the line, or be secretly a bit taken with her to the point where you don't give other girls a fair shot to impress you in turn. It's cool to value her friendship but it should add to your life, not limit it, otherwise it's best to part ways.

>>18105423
Did you try to make out with her at the end? If not, why not?

If she didn't ask for another one it would've seemed discouraging to me, now I don't dare to make a bet on whether she is or isn't. She could absolutely be busy for two weeks but it's more the lessened physical stuff.. did she seem more shy around you altogether? And is she generally a bit timid/shy? If so, it might just have been a bit of jitters that you suddenly felt more like a stranger again.

>>18105425
Yeah, absolutely.

It's an individual matter. Personally I don't like them but it's not an ideal for nothing. However if you want to impress the most girls, you're better off going for ottermode or another form of being slim and fit than trying to be huge.

>>18105441
Then ask her whether she considered those dates and tell her if not, is she up for a "real" date?
It's not pressuring her, I mean, it's sweet that you think of it but if she doesn't have the guts to say no you can't really protect her from that. That's her responsibility. The reason you ask someone out on a date is to give them the chance to shoot you down.

>>18105446
And how do you see yourself ever solving that if you only become more avoidant and don't get any additional experience opening up?

>>18105452
>>>18105425
thanks

>>18105455

>And how do you see yourself ever solving

Well... honestly I don't. I kind of just had accepted this is just the way it is.

>>18105452
We probably would have made out. After the second kiss she gnawed at my chin and then I gave her another kiss and said goodnight. We have something planned for tomorrow (today). She clings to me whenever we are with each other. Either going straight for my hand or locking her arm and basically holding on me closely.

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>>18105455
Fuck I was thinking of just telling that I really like her at the end of meet up. Im really afraid of rejection

>>18105452
>It's your choice but imo you should only do it if you're 100% convinced that you won't mind potentially seeing her date someone else a few months down the line, or be secretly a bit taken with her to the point where you don't give other girls a fair shot to impress you in turn. It's cool to value her friendship but it should add to your life, not limit it, otherwise it's best to part ways.

Eh, I actually probably would be sorta happy for her if she finds a good guy down the line. But I doubt its anytime soon, as AFAIK she hasn't had a relationship yet.

And honestly, I still see when other girls are trying shit to impress me and what not.

Also, I know that, but she has been a positive force in my life, so its more beneficial than not

>>18105467
Look at it like this. Some day you'll be a grown man, say forty, and look back on all this. If you long solved it you probably regret being young and turning this cute interested girl away because of your issues. If you never solved it you probably wonder whether it would've made any difference.

If you've already resigned yourself to not going anywhere with this girl or any other girl for that matter, tell her you have trouble opening up to people and see how she responds. If she still wants to go out with you, go for it. If you notice yourself freezing up or whatever, make it your only goal to tell her that.

The reason why is that a) you cannot logically expect anything to change if you're not changing anything about how you live your life, b) it will provide you a new experience and leaving your ~comfort zone is good for your self esteem and c) you can always tell yourself you gave it a try if it fails.

Obviously feel free to ignore my advice but I would absolutely do this if I were you. And for the record, I'm the anon who responded that I have similar issues.

>>18105468
>all this cutesy stuff
Yeah, she still likes you. Enjoy it, man.

>>18105473
I see that, but why do you think she's more likely to reject a date than a declaration of feelings? The latter also puts her on the spot a lot more and makes it more personal for her to decline.

>>18105476
Alright. Though I didn't really mean literally not seeing other women but more, comparing them all to her and concluding over and over again that initial crush is better (because of some traces of oneitis). But you know best what the situation's like.

>>18105480
It is just hard for me. I have a real bad insecurity about being flaked/rescheduled on. It happened on me so many time during my teens and has made a real impact on my life. I try to ignore but it is very hard. So when she keeps rescheduling it just keeps increasing that fear in me I have deep down.

>>18105491
I'm not trying to sound like I don't empathize with your problems. I am deeply afraid of men and have never had a relationship myself, my dad fucked me up, he was scary.
I am just skipping over that part in favor of the conclusion that yes short term it fucking fucking sucks but the long term perspective is worse. It feels like you are protecting yourself but you are essentially OK-ing behavior that could cause you to never have a family, never have a place to come home to.

And again for what it's worth, I've never been in a relationship either and I do go on dates. Even though once I had to get off the bus there because I was so nervous I puked.

>>18105488
With decleration of feelings I can blame it on how i felt in that moment if she rejects me with setting up date its more planned thing so its harder for me to say that

>>18105506
She won't believe that you suddenly had a weird moment where you thought you had feelings for her while you didn't. A date is actually more casual because then you can play it off as having a hunch you could come to like her that way and wanting to try it out instead of already having reached the conclusion that you have feelings.

>>18105488
>Alright. Though I didn't really mean literally not seeing other women but more, comparing them all to her and concluding over and over again that initial crush is better (because of some traces of oneitis). But you know best what the situation's like.

True. I guess, but point stands, I only had two girls really show interest. One has a BF, and the other just seemed crazy.. So....

But yea, I do know this situation best, obviously. For what its worth she's always given mixed signals, abd seemed like something was holding her back from committing to it. So...

My friend who knows this situation has said that she may either be too nice to say no, or she might be interested but wants to be career focused at the moment

>>18105522
Well she is only girl I ever truly liked so Im really afraid to mess it up. I dont like rejecting either so i always tried to keep distance with people. Because of that Im really clueless. Maybe what youre saying is right. I need to convince myself that she will like to see me like she did when it wasnt clearly stated. Well those things were basicly dates after all

>>18105542
The thing is that if she likes you, she'll like you asking her out or declaring feelings or even making a move whether or not you do it the way she would've theoretically preferred.
And if she turns you down, it won't be because you didn't follow the magic cheatcode to asking it the right way, it will be because she's just not interested. Which is fucking painful, but unavoidable. And if you never make a move you will lose her to someone else without a doubt.

>>18105552
Youre probably right but i know o couldnt ask her on date right now. I wouldnt be able to bear with results

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>>18105398
>Take a step back and look at what you put in vs what she puts in. Time, effort, energy, attention, warmth. Does she ask you questions? Listen to you? Remember what you said? Check up on your issues?
>Or does she only talk to you when she feels like it and only rants about her own issues? Does she talk over you a lot, doesn't seem to be curious about your life in turn? Does she ask you for favors a lot?
>Alternatively, flaking without stepping up. Yeah life happens and sometimes you can't make it, even last minute or twice in a row. What any sane person who is interested then proceeds to do is go out of their way to make it clear that this does not indicate disinterest. "Let me make it up to you, I'm free any night next week."

Second. She asks me to do a favor pretty often, usually a small one, rants how she's got her headphones broken, but I do never initiate since I once asked her to hang out and she refused. Once I told her about disease I had and now I get a lot of poisonous remarks about it.

heterosexual male here, a question for the 'other team', there's a gas station I frequent on my way to work, (buy OJ, cigarettes when I'm out, scratch tickets, etc), two weeks ago there's this 20 something dude that started there and every time I go there he literally looks happy to see me, he jumps up from his seat, goes around the counter and walks up to me, making small talk and whatnot, I notice he doesn't do this for other customers there, I know he's gay, but I suspect he may know I'm straight, I'm not a dick (pun intended) but I want to put an end to this and let him know he can't get in my ass, vice versa

>inb4 go to another gas station
This one is on the way to work. Going somewhere else is out of my way and will result in showing up late.