When to get physical? I went on a date last weekend with this

>>18099689
Do what feels right. Watch for clues from her. It's not the same amount of time for every person. Pay attention.

It depends completely on how the date went. If you spent the whole night laughing, interjecting each other, having inside jokes, and flirting, then sex or at least a steamy make out session is not weird afterwards.

If you just made polite small talk and there is no indication that you feel more than lukewarm about each other at surface level, going in for a forced kiss because you feel that needs to happen after the first date is just awkward.
You can typically also tell when she straight up wants a kiss. Making excuses to delay the last moments together, prolonged eye contact, her being flustererd or fidgeting, weird long silences that are not uncomfortable etc.

I would absolutely greet her with a hug or a kiss on the cheek next time, though, depending on which one is more common/normal where you live.

>>18099689
I'd like a short hug and smile upon greeting.

If the second date allows it and it feels right, maybe some hand holding when you walk.

Hug at the end and see if the body language is right for a kiss.

Since people don't really say they want to kiss, you have to read the body language.


My first kiss with my bf was a little awkward, but we survived it. It was after a hug and we just held on a little longer for a kiss. It was wanted by both of us, execution is just strange in the beginning which is normal.

>>18099691
>>18099695
Thanks for the advice
>>18099693
The first date was kind of a mix. I did make her laugh a lot and she said she had a good time. She was the one that suggested we meet again and she even texted me first a couple of days later to ask how I was doing. I'm terrible at reading people so I don't even know how into me she is.
The problem is that I'm not even sure if I'm that interested in her. Like I said, we're supposed to go out again today but I haven't even texted her and I'm really lazy to even go out.

>>18099737
Dude, she sounds cute. Either get your shit together or spare her the grief, because you sound like an asshole.

>>18099748
Rude

literally as soon as she starts giving positive signals you should be looking for ways to touch her .

high five is an easy non-threatening one to start off with . if you get her to laugh you can put your hand on her or something. don't do the last second kiss by the door thing, it's really cliche and awkward. just be touching as much as she's comfortable with, though it takes some practice to get it right .

>>18099737
Obviously you don't particularly like her and in that case you absolutely should not do physical stuff. Dick move if she is more taken with you and it causes her budding feelings to grow while you long know you don't like her too much.

>>18099763
I just wanna fuck her desu :^)

But in all seriousness, I'm thinking I should just stop seeing her because you're right, I don't like her as much as (I think) she likes me. But I also think that it may be my subconscious telling me I don't really like her when really I just have low self-esteem and hardly any confidence.

>>18099693
>If you spent the whole night laughing, interjecting each other, having inside jokes, and flirting,
that happens with a girl you see for the first time? Without alcohol?

>>18099776
Right? It's a bit much to expect those sorts of things on a first date.

>>18099776
That happens if you have great chemistry, yes. It's not the norm but that's what it looks like when two people get along amazingly. You never met that person who suddenly makes you sharper, funnier, more pleasant? It doesn't even have to be someone you romantically like, just someone you mesh with really well.

>>18099774
If you do want to fuck her you should change the vibe of the dates, move it to drinks at a bar, make more sexual comments etc.

Possible, but even if that's the case, how do you see yourself fixing it short term? And who says it's not a combination?

>>18099774
Get rid of those confidence issues. Use hypotheticals: if you had certain knowledge that she was down for cute love shit, would you hypothetically be down? Answer that question, ignore doubts, and do the right thing

>>18099787
It was an example specifically of when things could not be going better. Not what an average first date "should" look like in any way.

>>18099788
We never made any concrete plans for today, should I ask if she wants to get a drink tonight?
What if she says no? Should I just drop her?
It probably is a combination and I don't know how to fix it.
>>18099789
If I had certain knowledge that she was down for cute love shit then yes, I would be down.

>>18099788
>You never met that person who suddenly makes you sharper, funnier, more pleasant?
N-n-no. Maybe my memory fails me.

>>18099803
Then put yourself out there. You can't avoid risks in this life, but cute love shit isn't replicable. Even if you only know it briefly, it will be worth knowing. Follow up with her. Give her an honest, earnest chance.

>>18099803
Don't ask her out if you don't really know what you want from her. If you want to make her into a one time thing/bootycall, don't plan the date in advance, make it an impulse offer. Everything about the request should be a level more casual than things went so far.

Then I think you should just accept that this girl is lost, at least for serious relationship material. It might seem counter-intuitive to not keep her around but what can you realistically expect to change in that time frame?

>>18099804
Or the opposite? You can't rationally pinpoint what's "wrong" with a person, you might find them friendly, but every conversation just ends up flickering out, you are never on the same wavelength with humor, they never understand what you're saying right away... If you do know that, it's pretty much the opposite.
To be fair it's rare, but keep an eye out for it. Really nice when it happens, especially with someone you can easily snatch up as a friend.

>>18099816
I'll try, anon, but it's been some time since I've done this shit.
>>18099820
I'd say it's been pretty casual so far. Making her into a one time thing is the hard part (for me). If I wanted something serious then I would continue going out with her and see how things go. But I'm not experienced with short, casual relations.

>>18099844
Make it good, Anon. Make it last. It'll be worth it!

>>18099844
To be fair the set up works against you here. What usually happens is that you bring up sex before you ever go out together (if that happens to begin with). You introduce sexual teasing and if she does not shut that down, proceed to ask sexual questions and ultimately pictures. Guys who can sext well obviously have a huge advantage there. The most common mistake is that guys "prod" the woman to see if she's up for sex with crude straightforward stuff ("show me ur titties"), while they should be warming her up to the idea of sex, introducing it more slowly. The odds of her being horny already right when you are, are very low.

As for now, there's several things you can do. What happens most often is that guys keep at the dating routine, then ghost the girl once they had sex. Scummy, yes, and it makes girls more guarded, but it's up to you how bad you would or would not feel about those arguments.
You can also implicitly let her know you are now trying to fuck her more than you are trying to date her, by starting to try for sexting.
Or the third option is that you do the right thing, meet up with her, tell her you changed your mind about a relationship/realized it's not feasible for you now (flimsy but necessary excuse to save her some dignity), then hope she wants to stay around for some drinks and flirt more openly sexually then.
Slim pickings.

>>18099859
Don't listen to this degenerate. Commit!

>>18099859
Thanks, that was very helpful!
Now I just have to decide what I want and what I should do.

>>18099883
No problem, good luck!

>>18099820
Ahhhh well I did encounter that, with my male friends lel
Also I really liked talking to my crush in HS but she friend zoned and rejected me so I guess it wasn't it