Dead Bedroom Because GF was Raped

>>18094825
How much time did her ex-boyfriend get?

Has she tried counseling? How often do you have sex, if at all?

>>18094825

the problem here is you seemed to think it would just change. its not going to. its a traumatic issue and thats going to take soem serious therapy to get past, and most people never do. it doesn't define their lives, but it can ruin sex for you.

when i was a kid i ate fruit loops. afterwards i vomitted. i have never eaten fruit loops ever again. the htought makes me sick, even though it wasn't even the fruitloops that made me vomit, i just had some stomach bug.

similar issue with ramen. ate some, then went on a roller coaster, and comitted. now you can't pay me to eat ramen.

now imagine that instead of eating something and vomitting you got brutally raped, and then society kept telling you to just stop associating sex with that one time.

not gonna happen.if there is any hope, its in therapy, but i wouldnt hold your breath.

that being said, rape aside, your general feel for the relationship is actually quite common. pasiso nfades, and guys just wnat to have sex but girls dont work like guys, they have to be turned on, and will often stop you from doing so. so men often find themselves in something more closely resembling a 'partnership' more than a romance.

Break up with her. Yeah, I know, horrible, boo hoo. But from what you're saying she doesn't show any signs of getting better. Therapy might help, but most often than not people who experience a trauma refuse to put in the effort required to get over it. Even if she does try it would take a long time. And if you stay in a relationship with her you'll only get more frustrated and unhappy. You'll start blaming her, hating her and most likely you'll end up cheating and breaking up with her anyway. Just do both of you a favor and have a clean break-up now.

File: Cs5R5P2WYAANqJt.jpg (35KB, 426x571px) Image search: [Google]

35KB, 426x571px

>OP put his dick in crazy

>now he's not even allowed to put dick in hand

Ask her to go to an outpatient program, see if you can get financial aid or can pay for it first. This brought me years ahead with my rape issues. Be wary though, I have seen people break up with their significant other's in outpatient.

>>18094825
If she's not seeking help or attempting to fix the issue, break up with her. Even with counseling, these things take time.

Or she might be just cheating on you and using it as an excuse.

>>18094970
Definitely this.

Two questions:

-is she seeing a shrink?
-are you one?

If neither, break up

Don't break up with her, take her to a doctor, maybe she can see a specialist and get some meds, adjust her mood a bit. It takes time. A looong time. If you care about her, help her.

>>18094825
Don't take her behavior to heart. Chances are she is aware that her lack of lewd is causing you problems, and that doesn't help you or her down the road.
How you handle this situation depends on you, her, the relationship, and the needs of both of you and the needs of the relationship as a whole.

>>18094825
I mean unless the guy raped your GF when she already was your GF you should have just dropped her then. You should drop her now obviously though

>>18094825
I cant imagine I will ever love somebody so much that I will stay with her despite her being clearly damaged goods.

And how do you plan to have babies without sex? And if you dont want babies why are you still together?

And is her rapist behind bars? What if she is one of the rarest pokemons called asexual and this is just tactical manipulation? I know few cases of woman who dont like sex at all and they just "tolerate" it before marriage and kids tie you up and then they left you blue balled for ethernity.

Remember folks, being used-up is a real condition.

>>18094825
Dude she is probably cheating on you. If you're providing her half of the rent or even anything remotely luxurious for her she is using you for that and cheating on you.

>TFW i have no face when I am straight but let gay dudes pay for my meals and suck my dick for a free place to stay. Tell them I am gay. I won't even begin to explain the rest.

Wow you guys can be pretty awful in here, huh.

I'd try gently talking to her about it, ask if there's something you can do to make her more comfortable or if she needs some more time. If you want you can even tell her that you want more intimacy so you two can work it out together. Don't like, impose it on her or make her feel guilty, but express how much you like her and you're sad about not being able to express it. Dialogue is the key here.

>>18096147
You don't understand. They never have enough time. Girls aren't magical creatures that can solve their own mental issues. Nobody can do that effectively. They'll find a shitty way to rationalize it, and it'll sit back in their head causing all sorts of neurotic issues until they solve it. No, what she needs is professional help and to talk to somebody. The thing is, she'll always refuse. It isn't an issue, I don't want to talk about it, why are you making such a big deal about this, I'm fine I already told you. Meanwhile your entire relationship goes to shit, and you're treated like the biggest pile of trash and judged for having basic human desires. You aren't supposed to be physically attracted to me, you're supposed to love me unconditionally no matter what. You should just be okay with never having sex again for the rest of your life.

It never works. You stay, you suffer. You leave, you're an asshole. You've got one life, you know. I think it's wise to reconsider who you're going to be spending it with if you're not okay with the conditions of the relationship. Jerk or not.

I'm not saying don't give it a shot, but in my experience.... It never works.

>>18094825
sounds like bs to get traumatized from an ex fucking you. maybe she bsed you because she doesnt want to fuck you.

>>18094826
Fpbp

>>18094825
Break up. Also the rape thing could be a red harring. Long term Relationships die off into friendship zone without rapes you know

>>18096147

Anon, listen here if I ever learned something from /r9k/ its that women are liers. Listen to me when I say that a regular "rape" isn't even that "bad."

Ask that lying girlfriend of yours how that "rape" went and what the situation was. If she dodges these questions, she is a lying and you should just leave her ass.

Maybe she wasn't "raped," maybe she just had sex with her ex and regretted it. Thus "rape." Maybe it was normal sex but she makes a big deal out of it and I mean if nothing else works you could just rape her for real this time.

>>18096778
Dude, do yourself a favor and stop embarrassing yourself on the internet. Being understanding instead of a selfish sexist asshole can go a long way.

>>18096810
You must very naive if you think what he mentioned doesn't happen often.

File: gentlemen.jpg (32KB, 370x369px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 370x369px

>>>18096810

>why can't my man learn how to read between the lines?

>I left my man because he was reading between the lines too much.

Women transform any regrettable encounter into a rape memory, retroactively.

>>18097050
What, some bigot generalizing things based on brief text descriptions and suggesting rape as a solution? Oh I'm sure it does happens often, which is a shame.

>>18094825
She won't get better. Either accept it or leave.

Beware that she may meet someone special who magically surpasses this revulsion, and she will be very tempted to leave you, so you'll always be at risk if you stay.

>>18097060
Calling anyone a bigot not only doesn't explain anything but also makes you look like an entitled idiot who thinks she has the moral high ground in virtue of her vagina.

>>18096417
>harring
>>18096778
>"learning" from /r9k/
Shiggy.

to OP: If she doesn't want to get help for her issue, nothing will change. She has to want to resolve this situation, and you just wanting to get laid isn't the same as her wanting to get help. I'm sorry, but the only thing you can do at this point is leave the relationship. I usually counsel talking about your issue with your significant other before going nuclear, but I'm gonna assume you've done that a few times. Sorry for the bad news, homie

File: yeah ok.jpg (1MB, 8504x1000px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 8504x1000px

>>18097067
I guess you have the right to think someone confidently saying they're experts on the reasons behind every women behavior from browsing /r9k/ is not a bigot, even though I can't quite agree

>>18094825
Whatever you do, please do not consider rape as a solution

>>18097080
You are technically correct, but as I said, you failed to understand our explain why he or r9k might feel this way.

>>18097080
In fact, considering r9k a bigot and leaving at that without empathizing and looking for the underlining issue, is exactly the same mechanism they employ in simply dismissing women as a group, when they might have lots of different objections and anxieties that even though are manifested in a rather crass way, it is very real for then, just like Trump voters have very real complaints that were simply dismissed by liberals, which of course just validated those complaints even more and helping Trump win.
Use the socratic method to unveil the true intent of your opponent instead of confronting him directly, you fail to comprehend and he just close himself even more.

>>18096778
>a regular "rape" isn't even that "bad."
>Ask that lying girlfriend of yours how that "rape" went and what the situation was. If she dodges these questions, she is a lying and you should just leave her ass.
>If she doesn't wanna relive her rape with you, dump her

gg /adv/ always there when people need you.

OP just have an open and honest conversation with her about sex. You can respect her wishes but you also have wishes just like she does. To you sex is a part of this relationship, and you need to talk to her to see if that's something that is on the table or not. If it's not then you have to decide if you want to leave or not because it seems pretty important to you.

File: poobear.jpg (34KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

34KB, 1280x720px

If there weren't charges filed against the rapist, it wasn't rape.

File: 45365678568568568568.jpg (28KB, 600x614px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 600x614px

Okay I maybe went a little overboard with my comment but I hoped that most would be able to read the clear sarcasm in it.

Anyway to get back to the matter at hand, if she isn't ready to talk about it and what exactly was happening, that's not a good sign.

Also about "raping her for real this time," maybe it would be a smart move on OP's side to just be a bit more dominant. I'm not talking of wrestling her into a bed but small pleasantries, that she may doesn't seem to want at the moment. Playing with her hair occasionally, touching her hips, maybe even lightly pulling her close to you. That does can get a long way and that girlfriend of OP might get interested in him that way. I mean maybe she will realize that "dominant," or "playfully abusive" behavior towards her doesn't always have to mean the most extreme kind of abuse. But is more of a more direct way of expressing OP's love towards her.