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How do you make friends? Whenever I ask someone to hang out with

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How do you make friends? Whenever I ask someone to hang out with me, I always feel as if I'm being over-eager and needy, and usually get rejected. But if I don't ask people to hang out with me nothing ever happens.

So I guess, how do I ask people to hang out without coming across as over eager/needy. Pic tangentially related.
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How are you asking? People are far more likely to respond if you have something specific in mind.

If you just ask "wanna hang out?" Lots of people will blow that off unless you are like, super good friends because they're like, and what?
If you ask "Wanna see a movie?" you might get better results.


Also if you aim is the make friends you're probably better off joining some sort of club or interest group. Search around.
If all else fails, try volunteer work, but try hard to find something you do actually care about/have interest in. Like don't volunteer at the animal shelter if you hate dogs or something.
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>>18093402
Movies are usually my go to. I've both tried directly asking "would you like to go see x with me," and the indirect "I'm going to see x, if you wanted to come," route. Neither usually (ever?) work. I'm thinking of asking someone to come see Logan this weekend which is why I ask.

I've also joined clubs before, but how do you take it beyond the club? We show up once a week, or bi-monthly, are chill for the hour or two we're there, and then we don't even think about one another for another week or two.
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And I feel like I've really tried hard this past year too, and it really hasn't got me anywhere.

I started the new job about six months ago now, went out at every opportunity, all the happy hours, socials, and parties. And it seems like all my other coworkers are friends, visit each others homes on the weekends and such, and I'm still just left out. They went out drinking last week, went around the office and rounded everyone up, except me. They new I was there, they'd come in to invite the guy who shares a room with me, but just completely ignored me. Like fuck, I just want to be a part of the group.
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>>18093387
people only want to spend money if its someone theyre close to. try asking them to do something that doesnt cost any money at all.
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>>18093475
Make yourself be worth including. It might not be the case, but your post suggests that you try to like what others like over your own preferences. Being funny, having stories, or just acting in a way that others don't will grab peoples' attention and make them think of you. Of course couple such behaviors with being cordial and that's how I make friends quickly.
Even then, its an often-said piece of wisdom around me that it takes 6 months to make a friend.
>>
I'm sorry people are so callous to you, OP. It does sound like you've tried very hard. I don't have any advice, but I know how lonely it is and I'm just sorry you have to experience it.
Thread posts: 7
Thread images: 1


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