I am stress out my boyfriend by being insecure. I can tell he

>>18074732
*stressing out

>>18074732
Please help because I am torn

>>18074732

What exactly do you do that stresses him out?

As a person coming from the bf perspective, I would say that if you don't see yourself truly working through your insecurities in the foreseeable future; talk to him about it and maybe turning him loose might be a good idea. Talk to him first, but no one should have to feel obligated to someone else's insecurity. I'll tell you this, if he's as unhappy as I am and has a similar mindset to me. He's thought about breaking up with you several times when "the time is right". Although I know that doesn't exist.

Tell me, what are you doing to work on your insecurities. Do you have S.M.A.R.T. goals for achieving a better mindset?

>>18074829
Sometimes I message him to check if he wants to talk, and when he's not in the mood, I get upset and just message him more, because I'm worried that it's my fault. I stopped doing this though. If we're ever talking, and I express doubt in myself like whether I'm smart enough or something, he gets upset.
>>18074837
I have some specific goals like every time I want to needlessly talk to him, I tell myself my mantra of positive things and relax, and then reevaluate whether I have something actually worth saying. I go to sleep before he comes back from work so that I don't see him online and get tempted to talk to him when he's tired.
Those are pretty much all related how to not convey insecurity to him. In terms of becoming less insecure on the inside, whenever I have negative thoughts, I tell myself that positive mantra I mentioned. Whenever I am crying, I breathe deeply until I calm down.
How would I start this conversation? We've already had plenty of conversations, and each ends with us deciding that we can be happy, and then we spend a handful of good days without him getting stressed out.

>>18074853
Just fucking give him space. If you realize what you're doing enough to tell us, then you can realize it right before you send him the 30th message of the day and just shut up. My gf and I talk when we see each other, we have no need to text unless it's to plan when/where we're meeting next. Ffs woman

>>18074879
I do that now. For real. But the recent thing that happened was us talking a bit at the end of the day, and him getting upset when I became insecure over something specific.
So, do I just give him more space still, or is there no hope? Getting over my insecurities and catching them before I express them takes a while.

>>18074907
>Getting over my insecurities and catching them before I express them takes a while

Then give yourself a chance to get over them. If your bf can put up with them and isn't complaining too much, you can thank him by giving your relationship a fair chance while sorting your shit out.

>>18074918
He gets annoyed and ignores me when I am insecure, telling me that I am stressing him out. Maybe he is giving me a chance and time, but it is taking a toll on him.