Help solve a debate.

>>18074660

Yes and no. You can't choose who you are attracted to, or who you have good chemistry with. But "love" is more than "attraction". To love someone, you have to be willing to be there for them and they have to be there for you. You get to choose to make the effort or let the relationship disappear. So my answer is "kinda".

>>18074660

You can't choose to love someone unlovable, but you can choose who to spend your time and put your effort into until you come to love them.

My argument: being in love with someone is something that occurs despite your will and you can choose to walk away from them but love still remains. In the same sense you cant choose to be in love with someone despite all the love they provide you. Staying with someone or choosing to walk away does not mean choosing whether or not you love them.

>Choosing to leave means youre choosing to walk away from them or to ignore the feelings but theyre still there.

> The love is still there regardless of you choosing to not be with someone,choosing to ignore the feelings.

>Sometime it goes away, sometimes it dims but as long as youre in love with someone you arent choosing to love them youre simply choosing to walk away from them or your feelings.

Can you choose anything?

>>18074660
first you have to define love.


protip:
>it can't be done

Her argument: You can turn off your feelings choosing not to love that person anymore hence how you can choose not to love that person or vise Versa.

>you can ignore, turn off and they go away.Thats why it's a choice

>there is many different types of love e.g Friendship love.. and intimate love.. you chose to love someone as a friend.. hence why you can care about them ect ect. Intimate love is when you have feelings duh but you can choose whether or not to love that person back.

>when you start dating you choose to see that person again because you choose to develop a stronger connection with that person which then you choose to stay and love that person.

Here's another example
A girl has known a guy for a very long time. They hangout really close.. and the girl does everything for the guy. But the guy doesn't have feelings but the giirl does.. that girl can choose to keep following that guy around in the hope that he may love her back or she can make the choice to not love that person anymore and find someone else who can make them feel 1000000 times more in love than the last. Hence why love is a choice.

>You chooses in the sense of staying
And putting up with crap like that.
Ya and ur making the choice omg

>u don't stay with someone u don't loveAnd if u do u make the choice

>U choosing to stay together means ur choosing to love
Just like choosing to stay together even if ur not in love

continuing to see them and develop feelings / connections
Making that choice to love them
By ignoring ur feelings by moving on
That makes it a choice!

>ecause over time ur feelings go awaySo it's a choice u make.Time heals everything.And change and choices.

>>18074660
I don't understand the pic

>>18074704
Walking away is a choice, staying is a choice, acting on your feelings or ignoring them is a choice, having them is not in my opinion.

>>18074726
Just a picture from 9gag. Actress Daisy from Star Wars and her sister whos apparently a model and clearly they look alike. Dont get the joke either but I think theyre really pretty.

>>18074710
Love has multiple defintions in the sense that thetes a difference between loving someone and being in love with them but in this case we're defining it as having deep emotional and sexual affection or feelings for someone.

>>18074660

I get the joke in the pic.

To the topic:
I define love as follows:
"In love" = emotions; emotional attachments
"Love" = Acting/making choices for the good of a person

They can both exist with or without the other.

I believe you cannot directly choose the first (but you can choose to do things to stimulate or diminish it), but you can choose the second.

I believe the second is what's important and is truly "love". So to answer your question, I say: Yes. You can choose who you love.

>>18074754
I sorta define it the other way as you can love anyone from a parent to a friend but to be in love involved romantic feelings that make you make those gestures.

>>18074723
I don't think you can just turn off your feelings for someone, why else would people stay in toxic relationships? You can choose not to be with someone you love, for whatever reason.