Should I give up on my ex?

Women don't know what they want

/thread

>>18073066
Soo....don't contact her further? Let her figure shit out on her own?

Sounds like she isn't emotionally ready for a relationship on her own. Makes sense considering she just got out of an abusive relationship. You should give her some time

>>18073200
By give her some time do you mean never initiate contact with her again, or wait a month and reach out?

>>18073203
Wait a month. From what you said, it seems like she's still interested

>>18073194
Yeah. And if she does contact you again, tell her to fuck off

>>18073029
im having the same issue here we broke up she somethimes post songs and status that only talked about i miss you i wiash you were here etc etc etc she even sended me memes one night randonmly and a little chit chat still i know she likes a dude with musscles cuz all her friends told me, she is melting down for him she offered to walk his dogs to the beach one and full her facebook page with pictures of the two anyways she sometimes likes me profile pictures etc like wtf should i do???

>>18073267
i ended the relationship so sometimes she acts like she miss me and other times she acts like she doesnt care. i stalked the other guy and has a lot of likes from her on her pics ..... what should i do should i contact her or just let this end....

>>18073273
Sounds like she lost interest for you, is trying to fuck this new guy (or is probably being fucked), and is keeping you as a friend.

Ignore her messages, don't respond or text her ever again unless she says she wants to meet up. Tell her you're not interested in friendship and only want her to reach out to you if she wants to work things out, otherwise you hope things work out with the new guy (actually say that last part and mean it. It will be a huge slap in the face. Basically says "I'm fucking new girls, so I couldn't care less if you're fucking someone new.")

Invest your time in improving yourself and dating new women. If she has any romantic interest in you, she'll contact you to work things out.

>>18073308
thanks anon
i mean to be honest this new guy is way out of her league he has a lot of women behind him so he just wanted to fuck her and if it is that what he wanted well thats gonna hurte her and if all she wanted was him to fuck her im all good with that i already fuck two diferent girls since we broke up ... also when i broke up with her she told me she doesnt wanna be my friend or see me si that keeping me as a friend thing i dont think is real thats what confuses me the most

>>18073029
She might be afraid or unable to explain her feelings. Wait it out anon, she sounds like a nice girl and you sound like a nice guy. Best wishes to you.

>>18073029
While it seems that you want to get back together with your ex (why?) it also seems like you REALLY want to punish her and make her feel like shit for leaving you.

That's understandable, though it's something you should probably try to figure out and get over, especially if you want to try to get back together with her.

What I wonder is why you would want her back. She didn't want to be patient and supportive while you worked on securing your future -- something that benefits the both of you. I've found that having to put in long hours to provide a good life is not something that is appreciated by women who have never put in that sort of effort into anything themselves. If she had things going for her she would have put time into them instead of getting bored and impatient, and looking for another guy.

Even if she thinks now that she made a mistake, it's because shit didn't work out with the other guy. You look more attractive because not only can you give her more, but she doesn't have a replacement. That doesn't change that she left because she was unhappy that you weren't there to keep her entertained and she didn't care enough about you to wait.

Why do you want someone like that?

As far as why she wouldn't respond, well, even if she wanted to get back together, what did you imagine she would say to what you sent her? Were you fantasizing that it would provoke her to a realization and then tell you "oh, I'm so sorry, I made a terrible mistake, I want to get back together with you"? It looks like you sent her that message to rub her bad decision in her face, like a passive-aggressive "fuck you", not that you were hinting that you would consider getting back together. It looks like if she asked for another chance, you would reject her.

continued next message

>>18073380
cont

If she even wants to get back together with you, she apparently doesn't have the strength of character to face rejection and just flat out ask for another chance. Writing little "hints" giving an indication that she misses your relationship is the best she'll probably do. Even if she's interested in getting back together, YOU are going to have to be the one who has to act to make it happen.

I wouldn't think too poorly of her for this if I were you. You're just as fucking weak as she is. "Oh I can't talk to her first because it would make me look bad, right?" Fuck that. If you think she's of value, go pursue her. Stop being a pussy.

Understand though that she may not want to get back together with you. There are a lot of reasons to think that it's not going to work, the least of which is that you look like you're bitter as fuck. You should already know that this girl isn't likely to willingly put herself through any hard times.

Regardless of what you decide -- try again or not -- it would be best for you to let go of your hurt and anger that she left you. You don't have to forget that it happened, but you have to stop dwelling on it and keeping thoughts about it fresh in your mind.

For getting with her again to have any chance of working, you are going to have to really forgive that she left.

If you decide you want to move on, you have to put her in your past and letting thoughts of her keep affecting your emotional state now. Stop checking her social media and let thoughts about her fade. Then go find someone worth being with.

>>18073029
Ask her out directly. Maybe try and make it out like it's a restart where you'll get to know each other again.

After that if she says no or leaves it, then shrug it 9ff.
People grow apart. Some people grow in many ways, while others unfortunately stagnate. It sucks so much having to lose someone you spent those late teen years with what can you do.you found out how to better yourself and it's something you need to do. There are plenty of people out there and before you know it, someone will walk in to your life and they'll suit you far more than the person you grew apart from.

Go after you ex bevause you still seem to have some interest in each other, even if she is being funny about it. I think she maybe isn't she she can tryst you and wants you to re-earn it.
But if that fails, don't worry and move on dude. You have to think and care for yourself too.

(I broke up with my gf of 4 years at the age of 22.for growing apart. It sucked that it ended, but glad I made sure to think of myself of else I wouldn't be where I am or as happy as I am today)

>>18073466
>I think she maybe isn't she she can tryst you and wants you to re-earn it.
Damn autocorrect, I can't quite tell what I was trying to say but...

What I meant is that you broke up with her and left her vulnerable. So if you want to get back with her, you can't just walk onti her life and pretend to carry on from where it was. You need to earn her trust again and start from the beginning. (obviousky it'll fly by as you already have history)

>>18073397
The way I worded the message to her wasn't passive agressive at all, but I can see how my gestalt makes it seem likely I'm bitter, I'm not.

So...how do I get her back if I decide it's what I want? I think I need a bit more time to process my emotions, but if I don't hear from her in a while what do I text her?

>>18073641
I think trying to figure how to MAKE someone else feel or do what you want is a mistake.

I think just directly asking her if she would like to get together to talk is fine. You did that before and it didn't work, but she was seeing someone and wasn't interested in trying to get back together with you then. If you think you should let her know that you're asking because you're interested in getting back together with her, that's ok too.

I don't understand why you would want her. Well, that's not true, I understand why you want what you thought you had (a loving, stable relationship with a person you like), I just don't understand why you still think this is still something that's reasonable to have with her.

You're acting like she's your favorite stuffed animal and she got lost but you want her back, or she's some sort of prize and that winning her back is going to have meaning.

What she really is, is a person who you're going to try to be in a relationship with again, even though she's already shown you that you weren't a priority to her, and you know you can't rely on her to hold up her end to maintain a stable relationship if things get tough.

If she were the one to make the effort to reconnect with you, then ok, maybe that's showing that it's something that she really wants. Just posting shit on twitter and having her friend tell you she misses you just seems like she's not willing to make the effort or that she doesn't value the idea of reconnecting enough to take even the tiny risk of being rejected.

>>18073029
idk why men are scared to talk to their own girlfriends. if you dont talk to her she will assume you dont like her.

>>18073029
why is the grunge-y heroin addict in your op pic so hot to me? like why do i want to fuck this unkempt loser with face tattoos

>>18073778
Because he's Lil Peep

>>18073724
Best response. Op here, thanks anon. I agree. She has to make the effort, I'm worth more than chasing a girl who cut me off.

>>18073029
I'd never try to get my ex back.