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Anonymous
Insane unstable gf in a small city 2017-02-22 02:44:39 Post No. 18071976
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Insane unstable gf in a small city 2017-02-22 02:44:39 Post No. 18071976
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Hello. I've been trying to break up with an ex i got back together (for anyone wondering, never EVER get back to your ex. Only ends in shit, you WON'T be an exception, your case will not be special) ever since 3 months back, when we restarted. However, she's fucking insane, and her parents hate the shit out of me. She's immature and all that. I live alone and am independent, and because her mother discovered she's been coming to my apartment, she threatened to move her out of the city.
Thing is, this is one more reason to break up with her, which i tried today. But it only ended in a shitstorm. She rushed from her uiniversity to my apartment, begging and crying to enter, and i let her, because she is actually unstable. She gets shaky and stop moving under pressure. I tried to be reasonable, i tried to tell her it wasn't just because of her parents, but she kept screeching;
>STOP STOP STOP YOU'RE LYING YOU LOVE ME YOU KNOW IT I KNOW IT YOU'RE JUST LYING TO YOURSELF STOP STOP
I shit you not, she just kept screaming ''STOP'' and hitting me whenever i said that i don't actually want to be together with her. After about one hour, she decided to ''leave''. She just was sitting on the stars bellow. I started crying out of rage and frustration at myself because i let this happen and i was feeling fucking pathetic. She heard this, and interpreted it as ''crying because i loved her and didn't want to break up'', even if i kept telling her it was not the case. After the same thing happening, i found her on the lower stairs, close to the door, in cathatonic state. She called 5 of her friends (2 are mutual) and barely could speak anything, asking them to pick her up. I was forced to say i would think about things and what not, just to take her in, give her a chill pill, and take her to her uni.
What the fuck do i do? I want out of this. I tried breaking up and cutting all contact but she rushed to my apartment and starting monkey out.
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Don't tell her you're leaving, and you need to leave. You need to find a new place, or worst comes to worse just ditch your current rental and hide out in a hotel for a bit. Until then just weather the storm and act like nothungs wrong so she doesnt suspect anything. Tell your family or friends, someone you trust, the situation but not where you're going in case she grills them for info. Block her number or get a temporary phone, and block all her social media. Once you're safe where she can't find you, you can tell her you're done with her and don't want to be with her, and she needs to leave you alone. Just like that, don't give an explanation.
Alternatively you can make this a legal situation and try and get a restraining order. You've broken up with her dude, every breakup has a dumper and a dumpee and it's not up to the dumped to decide it isn't over. You're not in a relationship anymore, you are being hounded, stalked and harassed and you are in the right to say you want out of that. Let this psycho wreak all the havoc she wants, she can't have you.
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>>18071976
Establish that your breakup is final. Stand by your word. If you need to, grab some friends and family to stand by you and make sure you don't cave in again.
Don't cave in.
If she insists on maintaining this toxic relationship, tell her you will file a restraining order. If she continues, act on it.
Cut off any and all contact with her, her family, and all her friends you don't call friends of your own.
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>>18072009
Do i really need to leave?
>>18072025
By ''don't cave in'', you mean, don't stay home?
Also, i'm thinking of just texting the break up when she's home. Is that good?
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>>18072175
You've already told us that she's going to come to your place and won't leave you alone until you let her back it no your life. Sounds like the best case scenario is to leave, although what other anon said about having friends or family with you when you break the news to her is a good idea IMO too.
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>>18072192
Well, i just broke up. Nothing blew up yet. Just this shitty minor feeling. Blocked all contact and all. Let's wait and see.
Thanks for the answers.
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>>18072239
Keep us updated
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Seems to have worked so far. On the other hand, does this feeling of ''maybe she wasn't so bad'' and longingness goes away? Is it normal?
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>>18072578
It does, it just will take time and filling that time with working on yourself and enjoying new and other things. As a man who has experienced a myriad of different relationships I can assure you that if your OP was truthful, that yes she was that bad and there are girls much more kind hearted and aware of your emotions. It will feel like you're alone, but that is not a bad thing. Solitude is a gift, and allows you to know yourself and develop a better relationship with yourself, which will make all things in your life easier. And for what it's worth anon, you have my best wishes. Good luck.
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>>18072631
Thank you. Right now, it's hurting. But i only hope it goes away as fast as possible I won't contact her.
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