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Whats a good way to talk to a girl you just recently met on dating apps?
For example, I just met this girl through Ok Cupid. So far we have had actually a pretty steady conversation and I have avoided the whole one word responses.
But I feel like I can engage her a little better. As I notice my responses tend to be a bit more detailed than hers.
So whats a good way to engage her or make the conversation something she looks forward to? Good thing is that I already have a small date setup with her this Wednesday. So I am doing something right. I just often default to asking questions about her. Is that okay? I do not end up wanting to become a game of 20 questions so I try to avoid it if possible or is that socially acceptable when getting to know someone???
Granted its been about 4 years since I been in the dating game so I am just getting a feel for all this again. I appreciate any feedback.
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I think just asking her about her interests and replying with a genuine answer. I know I appreciate someone who listens to what I say and who also offers bits of themselves in turn. It sounds like you're doing well. Just listening with genuine interest is not to be underrated.
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Asking general questions is ok, but you don't want to have the conversation turn into an interrogation. Let the questions lead her (or you) into stories, discussions, debates on the subject matter at hand.
If you ask her what food she likes then see if there's a way to build off that like discussing her history with that food or maybe a funny encounter you had with it.
I'm shooting from the hip because I have no idea what you two have already covered, but the sentiment remains the same.
Your goal is to help remove the formality and stilted nature of your speech from the conversations you two have yet had. You want to make her feel conformable and at ease when talking to you. Be attentive, but not idolizing, and try to interject genuine humor.
I know this is going to sound cliche, but you really do want to be yourself. If you try putting on a persona or hiding your true temperament, you'll eventually slip up or become exhausted with the act.
Also, that last thing you want is her becoming more interested in your persona than you, yourself.
Remember anon, not every catch is meant for you. If you end up not being her type and she moves on, there's nothing wrong with that and nothing you can do about it. Just shrug, straighten up and get back out there!
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>>18067649
Conversation needs to be organic.
Don't ask questions compulsively, jumping from one subject to the other.
If you're talking about a topic, ask questions related to the topic, tell stories, make jokes, comment on stuff. Add small flirty remarks and compliments.
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Thanks guys! Thats generally what I was looking for so that definitely helps.
And >>18067683 you make a good point. I am kinda losing sight of being "myself" and still a little too much in that formal persona. Thanks for the reminder
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