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This is serious guys, i really need your opinion on this. I posted

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This is serious guys, i really need your opinion on this.
I posted about a month ago here regarding my gf being overly jealous. We had a talk about it and she accepted it is something wrong and we work on it. Since i don't wanna go into wall of text, i'll just greentext the rest
>2 weeks ago a fem friend sent me an invitation on facebook, accepted
>she asked me if i know if we have our exam results
>2 hours later my gf starts acting silent, i ask her what's wrong
>"I saw you accepted a pretty girl on your facebook... do you think she's pretty?"
>I'm like what the fuck, ask her what even is that question
>She asks me if i talk with my female best friend
>Today, my female best friend's twin sister messages me if i have time tomorrow because she has some "business" to talk about
>I know she wants to invite me to her wedding
>Tell my gf that i'll visit her later because of that (we hadn't set a certain hour)
>She goes into the same mode she did 2 weeks ago
>I try to talk with her, she ignores me
>i get mad because of the way she handles this
>Ask her why it's always her jealousy or fear that dictates everything in our relationship
>she doesn't know
>she claims she tried to do something about it, but with no effects
>i ask her if she even knows the reason of her jealousy
>she doesn't
>she didn't even look for it
Okay folks, how do i actually do something about it? Didn't go into details because it wouldn't bring much. I'm tired of being threated like a suspect every time i talk about something like this, but i also don't want to be unfair and keep secrets. I feel like nothing fucking changed, and this triggers me like crazy.

Also on a side note. We had sex a week ago, and our condom broke. She took a morning pill, i did some research and i kinda am stressed about it.

If anybody could help with at least one of these matters, i'd be very thankful.
>>
she's not going to change who she is, either deal with her being a jealous bitch

or don't
>>
>>18056141
Is your gf old and ugly as fuck? Normally the jealous ones are old bitches that don't realise how ugly they are.
>>
>>18056149
I think you're probably just fooling around, but no, she isn't ugly nor old. That's why i can't even comprehend why she's so jealous. Before we started dating she acted like she's super self-confident and the further the relationship goes the more of that claimed "self-confidence" dissapears.
>>
Well, she's probably not going to change much, but if you want to stay with her there are a few things you can do to make it easier for you. Make sure you give her compliments regularly. Both on appearance AND other things. Such as her being strongwilled, smart, nice, caring. Just say whatever is true. The other thing is, if she feels uncomfortable with you hanging out with a girl, take her with you for the first couple times. It will reassure her to see how you interact with them. Also the fact that if you take her with you, there's no doubt in her mind that you might be hiding the fact that she's your gf. Always be open with her. NEVER get mad at her for asking too many questions about other girls. If she asks questions about their looks, always direct it back to her. "Do you think she's pretty?" "She can't even compare to how beautiful you are."

If you know one of her insecurities, help her work on it. The happier she is with herself, the less competition she will think that she has. I think you need to ask her if there's something you did that gave her the wrong message. Girls usually don't start acting like this for no reason.
>>
>>18056172
The thing is, i actually tried everything you mentioned. I wanted to take her with me, she responded with "You're only doing it so i will accept this and stop bothering you!" She knows my friends, she's the first girl i've introduced to my family etc. Yet when it comes to her jealousy, she happily insisted on me promising her i won't ever meet with any other girl besides her, and she openly admited that she wants me to kick my bestie out of my life. I asked if i even gave her the a reason to act like that, and she said i didn't. I thought she actually tried to do something, but all that changed right now is that she'd rather try to do the "silent days" if she doesn't accept it rather than forcing me to do what she wants. And being jealous of somebody wanting to invite me to her wedding just because she's a girl? That's fucked up, and i'm not willing to put up with stuff like this.
>>
>>18056188
Oh ok wow that's fucked up if she's not even willing to let you be friends with other girls at all. I'd end it if I were you.
>>
>>18056202
I know right? I probably will talk with her tomorrow and see if she even wants to look for the reason of her jealousy. If she'll keep dodging the topic then she leaves me no choice.
>>
op consider the following:

>overly jealous girlfriend
>constantly questioning you about other girls

but what about her? she says "she doesn't know"

have you ever thought that this is projection? whats her life looking like with the boys she knows OP? i don't want to say she's cheating

but someone THIS overly jealous is obviously doing it for SOME reason. there is no "i don't know"

ask her if she is cheating, straight up. find out why she is actin this way. there is always a reason. maybe she isn't cheating, but maybe her thought of thinking about it and its making her fear you cheating and leaving her

maybe
>>
>>18056206
I think this is something a therapist would need to assist in. I doubt she feels jealous and wanting you to get rid of your friends on purpose like she would choose to be like that. I think everyone goes through a phase where they see their SO hanging out with someone of the opposite sex and get jealous. It's just that most people find a way to deal with it so it doesn't bother them.

It seems like your GF hasn't found a way to deal with that. To me this seems like just one challenge that comes with dealing with your GF. You want to help her and I think psychology will be the biggest help to her. She might not be interested in spending time of her life to find a way to handle this part of her. You can't force it but you can talk to her about seeking help. It'll be up to her if she wants to continue in life thinking the way she does now or put effort into changing things.

As for you OP look at this as a test to find out what you really value in life.
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>>18056141
the problem is you glanced at her photo one second longer than you were supposed to and now she will hate you forever. welcome to women.
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>>18056232
This. I have major anxiety, causing a lot of issues with jealousy. I could see it was becoming a problem in my last relationship, so I started going to a therapist and started working on my communicating with my boyfriend. At first things started getting better, but unfortunately it turns out one of the girls I wanted him to stay away from was for a legitimate reason. But at least I know that I did everything I could to be better for him.
Thread posts: 12
Thread images: 1


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