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Three questions for advice

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What would you say to a guy (in his 20's) who's actually trying to get a girlfriend but keeps getting rejected (by all sorts of girls) ?

Should he hit the gym and gradually become physically fit ?

Or should he just stop talking to girls and focus on his own life ?
>>
Go to therapy (as I have), take meds.

Yes

Yes
>>
>>18054597
Stop talking to vapid cunts with no interest in you?
>>
>>18054597
By your 20s you should have learned that physical appearance is not the dominant factor for women as it can be for men. By all means look your best, but give serious consideration of what it is in your personality that isn't drawing women to you.
>>
Learn from your mistakes. Figure out why they were not attracted to you.
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>>18054604
Girl here and this guy is right, appearance is a factor but not as much of a factor as how a guy acts around me. If his personality is shit or he has awful behavioral quirks then I'm not gonna want to be around him and will reject him.

If given a choice, I'd prefer a boyfriend who's physically unfit but has a good sense of humor about it and a cool personality over a guy who is hot as fuck but bland/unrewarding to talk to or acts like a fucking dickhead.

Consider that maybe you act weird or awkward around girls you want to ask out, and that might be offputting to them.

Also consider that if you ask out a lot of girls just because they're girls and you want a girlfriend, you come across as desperate.
>>
>>18054629
>awful behavioral quirks
Can you list some? I wanna see if I identify myself.
>>
>>18054633
Just general inconsiderate things like interrupting, one-upping people in conversations, creepy unwarranted flirtatious comments, or trying to force social interactions with people who don't really want to talk to you, etc.

Another big one is when guys try too hard and force themselves to act "cool" for a girl, which usually just comes across as stiff and uncomfortable. Also, being too clingy or invested in someone you barely know is a huge red flag as well, it screams "stalker tendencies".

Being naturally nervous or awkward isn't necessarily a deal breaker (at least for me) as long as his heart's in the right place and he's not acting like a super badass edgelord as some kind of autistic mating ritual.

I dunno. I think you've just gotta go for generic conversation building at first, like you're just talking to any new friend. Find a hobby or an interest you have in common and talk about that instead of getting too in-depth into talking about yourselves, at least in the beginning. Once you start getting into solid conversations about each other as people then it's probably cool to initiate the "hey, so do you wanna go out somewhere sometime?" talk

Oh, and if she says no, don't just drop contact with her afterwards, especially if you go to the same college/university or she knows a lot of other girls in the area, because word WILL get around that you're just on a pussy hunt
>>
>>18054601
Ugh god... This is borderline mom advice... He can't know girls have no interest in him at all until he says at least a few words to them, dumbass.

Please die -- literally.
>>
>>18054629
>>18054683

This is very true.
In general what I personally prefer is a guy who treats me like he'd treat a male friend, and gradually starts flirting with me more and makes the tone more sexual over time. Shows you have an interest in me as a person other than as a vagina owner, makes me feel valued.
Also, as the other girl said, I can tell if you're uncomfortable doing whatever you're doing. It feels weird. Don't pretend you're super cool, if you're an awkward sperg be an awkward sperg.


Then, OP, by all means - get fit. Improve yourself. Do your best to be attractive. But it's not the most important thing ever.
>>
how does a guy learn to stop being weird around chicks he actually wants to get to know better/has an attraction towards?,but is on point with those he doesnt care about more then acquaintances
>>
>>18054716
>. Shows you have an interest in me as a person other than as a vagina owner, makes me feel valued.
i'm not OP but fuck what am i doing if everytime I talk (just casual) with a girl and eat out with her, I have a quarter boner

it makes it hard to go any further because I dont want to have a boner in public, but it's really just friendly body contact or close proximity or even just talking next to her (in sort of close proximity)

I masturbate everyday and I'm over 20 years old so it shouldnt be puberty
>>
>>18054771
>being embarrassed of your little mate showing appreciation of the woman you're with
>>
>>18054597

When you hit 25-26, it may be the time to accept that it may not be for you.

Its hard to not be bitter about it at first, but eventually you learn to become humbled by it.

You learn to limit your interaction with people in general and you come to appreciate them more, because you know you'll likely never see them again.

But I would suggest to you anon to focus on your life. Learn a new trade, take up a new skill, or an (individual) sport.
But do it for you, and you only.
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>>18054715
You first. Cunt. OP avoid this type.
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>>18054776
it's no fun staining my underwear with precum first thing in the morning

already did just thinking about her.
>>
>>18054825
Christ, get a grip. Think about trannies when you're with women.
>>
In my early 20's I got rejected all the time. You are either trying to force it to hard in a public space, or skimming trash at a bar. Both suck. Stick to parties and dog parks.
>>
>>18054969
Can I ask if you managed to find a meaningful relationship since your early twenties?

Also, say that I have worked on myself. I have hobbies (I write, I work on personal projects/school, and I'm decent in conversing with people once they give me a chance/seem halfway interested, that is). What is the problem? How do I meet more women? How do I keep getting rejected? Is it more a problem of numbers, as in I don't meet too many new people often? I tend to stick to myself and my own social circle.
>>
>>18054683
>because word WILL get around that you're just on a pussy hunt

Is your advice really, that a guy should stop looking further, settle into the friendzone and should not approach other girls, because if this one girl doesn't like him, noone else wants to?
Imagine if companies would do that to people that are looking for a job. "Yeah you can work here a few month without pay, otherwise no other company in the area will take you"

A date invitation isn't an "I know you for an eternity, let's be together for an even longer eternity" It's an offer to get to know each other and declining it means you are not at all interested in this person. What would you even do with this guy then? Talk to him about your dating problems to cause extra harm?

This sounds too bizare to be actually the female strategy
>>
try online dating, offline approaching women is really dead since feminism took over.

Also learn to have fun with female friends, not fun as in sexual fun, but do something with them without persuing any sexual agenda whatsoever. A lot of girls are fun to be around and if you can survive beeing the only man in a pure female group, you are basically ready for a GF. Since reaching that point I have been on 5 dates and took the two that I was interested in as far as I wanted.
>>
>>18054683
The irony in all of this, is that everything you listed as detrimental is literally what people typically have to do to get a date, otherwise you miss your chance and deliberately put yourself into a friendzone situation.

Obviously if someone is physically attractive, all of that is just le quirky behavior. Catch 22s are a bitch.
>>
Dating in America is unironically fucking gay and a chore these days.
>>
>>18054597
Don't act desperate. Women are like sharks when it comes to smelling desperation.
>>
>>18055612

Sometimes they just want a friend and that's as close as you are going to get. Just happens.
>>
>>18054597
All of the above. Keep asking, get better at asking, get your life together, get your body /fit/ and cleaned up, make sure your head is right, all that. You don't need *all* of them, but they all help. Just remember, even if 90% don't work out, it's the 10% that matter.

>>18054751
Remember that they're people, treat them like people. They're not perfect or unapproachable, they burp and fart and fuck up just like you(although they tend to at least try to be discreet about

>>18054771
All the same shit you do any other time you have a half-chub. Think about other shit, cover it up, adjust pants if you can do so subtly, and pretend it doesn't exist.

>>18054781
Don't give up because of age. I had my first kiss at 27, I'm getting married this summer.
>>
>>18054597
If you're being constantly rejected then take a break from dating for a while m8. Maybe it's not your time yet. Do everything else in lines 2 and 3 but chill on the dating part. You're still young and if you come off as desperate to girls then you will probably be rejected. I had a few chances myself but I didn't look for them. Patience friend.
>>
Focus on your own life or personality.

Source: I tried getting in shape over past years, my skin is clear as fuck, Im finishing a college degree, my family is upper middle class, and I dress nice. Women do not speak to me ever. I have friends too and generally other guys like talking to me. I probably have above average looks, but that doesn't do shit for me. Unless it's because im white and girls like dark skin now a days.
>>
Every advice in this thread is rubbish.
Anyone who says looks aren't important is lying. Looks are the primary consideration be it dating or anything in life.

Go to gym yes and work on yourself you'll get a gf.

Kik mocohocarolyn
>>
>>18056826
not your personal army, pal. fuck off.
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>>18054751
Social skills are no different than any other skill you have to practice and work on to perfect.

Go to social events that have a lot of women your age group. Not necessarily to get a gf, but to learn how interact with them. Watch what the guys do when they approach the girls. Once you've seen what works, try it out yourself. The first few times might be bad, but you'll eventually perfect it and soon you'll be a pro at talking to women.
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>>18054810
OP is looking for girls dumbass. I'm a guy. What made you think I was a girl from my reply. Jesus Christ, go back to school. You're fuckin' dumb.
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>>18056921
Cunt.
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>>18054597
You should absolutely go to the gym. It makes 50 year olds look 20
>>
all you need to do is improve yourself and maybe then you can score
>>
Go to /biz/
At yours 30 goto some asian island and fuck 18-20yold chicks till you die
Thread posts: 36
Thread images: 1


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