Fuck this, i became beta as fuck growing up I was more of an

>>18052156

The obvious question here is what happened between childhood and now to make you feel this way?

>>18052156
1. yes
2. call them out. in that way you are also helping them by teaching them, otherwise you're allowing them to continue to fail
3. context is important. stand up for what you believe in and all but don't be dumb enough to get yourself killed for something small unless you want to die for your stand

4. You were given life by your parents. What you do with it is up to you. You have everything you need to have success and move up in life; it's up to you whether or not you do.

>>18052159
The breaking point is very clear for me, i will sound like a pussy because i understand that it may not seem like a big deal, but i lost my best friend when i was 13.

He didn't die or anything, it's just that we always were together and i loved him like a brother. I was very extroverted (Maybe too much, some people thought i was crazy.), i had no ego or superego, no interior voice to tell me when i was doing stupid shit. But then he just started hanging out with somebody else and i can see myself in the classroom, looking at them laughing while i was now alone at my table, i felt humiliated and betrayed. I never told him about this.

I looked at them and i instantly retreated in myself. I was super extroverted and i suddenly fell into the exact opposite. I've been introverted and awkward ever since. High school was shit, i had no friends, all my former relationships gradually faded and i felt even more unadapted and shameful.

Now things got somehow a bit better, i more or less learnt how to behave in society so i now have some "friends" so i'm not a total recluse anymore, but i still struggle with the matters i spoke about in my previous post.

Sorry for the blog post, wanted to answer your question precisely.

>>18052168
Thanks, i guess you're right about all the points. Most of the time i don't act because in stressful situations i tend to sperg out immensely and lose total control of what i do/say, and as i'm really insecure about a lot of stuff, i can say or do a lot of dumb shit. I'm very scared about the way people will perceive me when they'll see the "real" me with all my imperfections instead of the usually quiet dude.

help me pls

are my problems that uninteresting?

u should start thinking in get your redemption for being a beta, start to listen to inner voice and remember every tale begin with just one step, do it pal

>>18052259
Feeling insecure and small is all part of growing up. A lot of people suffer from depression when they are in their 20's. All this talk about feminism is bullshit. What good is it for when all it does is harming your self esteem? Forget about it and loosen up. Worrying won't lead you nowhere. Also stop projecting and be more open to other people. We don't live in South Park.

>>18052259
yes
go to r/theredpill and start reading

>>18052156
I feel you man. When I was 11 I sat at the cool kids table, didn't give a shit what people thought about me, talked to anyone and wasn't scared to tell girls I liked them.

However that all changed with one little incident I had with a kid.

>used to make wooden swords with grandma
>would ride roller blades around gated community swinging swords
>ran into a group of kids
>they all liked my swords
>asked me to play tag
>ff like 3 months
>friends with most kids in community
>friend becomes friend with punk skater dude
>bad influenced desu but whatever
>friend makes a wooden sword
>jokingly say what is that
>we both laugh
>his punk skater friend fucking lost it on me though
>says hes gonna beat me up if I say another word
>grabs me by the shirt and yells at me
>I turned around and walked inside and laid on my bed thinking wtf happened
>he told everyone that I pick on kids younger than me
>stole my bike the one day I didn't lock it up

Ever since then I have always censored myself because I am scared to say something that might make someone rage at again. Probably the main reason I became anti social and had hard time making new friends.

>>18052156
The trick is to pretend you're not beta

Whenever you walk out of your door just be someone who's not scared of confronting people. Who cares if you get beaten up or make a fool of yourself? Once you get back home drown yourself with the things that make you happy (like vidya, netflix, music, food, alcohol or whatever)
That's how I, a cynical & antisocial /b/tard, get through the day. When I go to work I put on my fake not-beta personality. When I come home I turn on my computer and continue hating everyone else

>>18052156
Where can I find more pics like that?

>>18052437
If that was it for you, then im pretty certain in my case it was my dad.

He was a master at making me feel like i was a good for nothing pice of shit, he hit me on occasion and had a habit of having loud outbursts if you did something wrong.

I was terrified as a kid. He wasn't really a bully in that sense, he could be nice, but if i broke something, or did something that anoyed him it was likely to get yelled at or get slapped.

I think that made me into a person who is always walking on eggshells sort of, at least around authority figures and around strangers.

>>18052610
OP here, i had the same kind of father, really. I relate to everything you've said.

>>18052376
>>18052419

Thank you. I'll do my best.

>>18052437
That sucks man. These kind of stuff seem so begnin and yet...

>>18052516
Yeah i try that a lot, but whenever i do it it just makes me nervous as fuck and that doesn't really help. I'd like to really be myself

>>18052590
Dunno, sorry, it's just a random picture i saved from another thread.