Broken Hearts Club

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got weed

got beer

got vidya

no problem

>>18047665
what video games are you playing?

>25
>KV
>Women my age are becoming mothers, I'll never be one
>Last guy I felt anything for flirted with me when he was drunk but then the next time he saw me looks at me with disgust and annoyance as I spaghettied in front of him
>Tell my story on 4chan, get told how easy I have it

I want to die

>>18047665
I did this for about 5 years before it started to feel empty. I suppose it's easier to do this than putting your emotions on the line.

>>18047679
I hate the women have it easier line too.

I think it's probably easier for me to get sex than the average male 4channer, but it's just as hard for me to find a connection with someone, which is what I want.

I am incredibly shy and don't click easily with people. When I do like someone, I get pretty obsessed and it's unhealthy and embarrassing.

I don't have any confidence. I really thought this guy liked me back and I never think that.

The worst part is he keeps acting vaguely and only occasionally like he likes me in person. It's torture. I just want him to leave me alone.

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>>18047684
got whores

got bros

got quiet when I need it

no problem

>>18047703
>>I hate the women have it easier line too.

this is true, almost all the girls i know, including my sister and friends, are dating more than one guy at the same time

>>18047711
Guys with muscles and status date shitloads of women at the same time.

Men are geniuses and retards. Women are anchored to the middle.

>>18047714
i understand, maybe i couldnt see that yet because my social circle is limited

>>18047711
Not all girls are outgoing and social and good with guys. I am terrible with guys. Every time I open up to someone, it's a disaster.

>letting other people define your happiness
have fun with your pity party guys; no wonder you're alone.

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>>18047733
>self-righteous hubris directed at nobody in particular

Whole group's here, time to start the party

>>18047733
It's not an all the time thing. It's just a Valentine's Day Eve sulk fest for me. I'm keeping busy and doing some programming tutorials, but I'm also sad.

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I'm going to class and work and the gym tomorrow and then hiding myself in my room distracting myself with a combination of Youtube, vidya, and schoolwork to desperately attempt to keep the pain away.

I joke about oneitis a lot, use it to refer to girls I have a crush on, but I think I'm experiencing it for real right now. The girl I was with at this time last year, I keep getting thoughts that I'll never be as happy with anyone else as I was with her. She broke up with me on April 2nd of last year to "figure herself out", and got a tall handsome muscular bf in the Navy less than three weeks later.

I'm the definition of a beta orbiter to her right now, I guess. Since we still go to the same school and her boyfriend is deployed for months at a time, she and I still talk pretty often. She has it in her head that we're still friends, and on some level I do really wish that I could stop being so crazy about her for five minutes so that I could actually be a good friend to her too. It doesn't help that she's one of the only people I feel like I can actually talk to. I tried going no-contact at the beginning of January, and it lasted for all of ten days before I cracked. She said she was so stressed out by me not talking to her, and I apologized and promised it wouldn't happen again. I don't like breaking promises.

I don't know what to do. Fuck this shitty life.

>>18047785
Go no contact. It took me a year and a half to go no contact with my ex, but after a month or so of awfulness, it really has made things easier.

There are still nights where it's hard and I think about texting him, but it's not nearly as bad as it used to be.

>>18047733
>Create a society that mass celebrates holidays that say "Yes, other people do define happiness for you!!!"
>Wonders why lonely singles bitch every season

If you want it to stop then spread more love. Can't? Then you deserve to be just as alone as anyone else ITT.

>>18047802
You're right. Nothing positive is going to come from staying in contact with her.

I'm worrying over how to explain it to her, but I guess it doesn't really matter at this point. We haven't talked since Friday, so I'm just going to let the silence go on until she tries to talk to me, and then I'll figure out how to talk to her.

thanks anon, I hope things work out for you.

>>18047703

I feel bad for you but the loneliness inside of me says that sex is better than nothing...

Haven't had sex or a relationship in 5 years since I was sexually assaulted. Got rejected by a girl I really care for recently and I just wanna die. Forever fucking alone.

>>18047829
You don't need to explain anything. When I cut myself off from my ex, I just told him I needed time and blocked him before he could respond to talk me back into beta orbiting him some more.

>>18047834
This is maybe fair, but there's so much societal bullshit tied up in girls having casual sex (low self esteem, supposedly "lessening" your value, guys just using you) that it doesn't feel good when a dude just wants to nail you.

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I'm going to make an online dating profile after valentine's day.

I'm 23.
Not neet or ugly, but my social circle has no girls.

>>18047865

> but there's so much societal bullshit tied up in girls having casual sex (low self esteem, supposedly "lessening" your value, guys just using you) that it doesn't feel good when a dude just wants to nail you.

This. We don't get bragging rights when we have sex like men do, and it actively harms us. Even if the "women can get sex so easy" meme is true, what does it matter when it gets us nothing good?

**hugs everyone in this thread**

>>18047877
Abolish paternity fraud, then we can talk about ending the broken-lock meme.

>>18047703
>The worst part is he keeps acting vaguely and only occasionally like he likes me in person

He's probably really into you, but he won't ask you out because a guy getting rejected by a girl he's close with is literally the worst feeling ever and would ruin the friendship as well, so he won't risk it.

If he asked you out would you say yes?
Conversely, since your a woman and have nothing to lose by doing it, would you ask him out?

>>18047909
>If he asked you out would you say yes?
>Conversely, since your a woman and have nothing to lose by doing it, would you ask him out?

I kind of feel like I did? I gave him my number and told him to text or call if he ever wanted to hang out or talk.

In retrospect, I put the ball too much in his court and wish I had made a concrete offer, but I feel like what's done is done.

As a guy, I find it hilarious that everyone tells me that it'll all be okay and finding a girl will just happen. I realize that was all bullshit, since guys have to initiate, I could actually become a wizard on my current trajectory.

I want love but I could completely bypass it if I don't do anything.

>>18047877
I'm not even sure how much I buy the line about women getting sex easier than men anyway. It seems like all but the most troll like of men would also be able to get sex if they just lowered their standards enough, just like women.

Surely there are 250 lb girls out there that just want a warm dick for the night or a boyfriend to love them.

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>>18047926
>hey /adv/ I'm single and I don't know how to stop being single
>quit posting about being single I want you to be single in silence
>let me take your singleness as a chance to preach my opinions

>500 replies and 250 images hidden, click reply to view.

Hey confused kid, here's your answers:
A) lift
B) go outside
C) get some damn money in your pockets, which doesn't mean spend it
D) all of the above

Multiple choice test, choose four answers to pass and move on.

>got dumped almost a month ago out of nowhere
>mfw this week is his birthday, my birthday, AND valentine's day
>mfw throwing myself into rebound sex has done nothing

I'll probably just play vidya and hang out with my cat tomorrow

>>18047865
I didn't even bother telling my ex when I went no contact with him. I felt like he didn't deserve after what an asshole he was. I did make it clear that I didn't want to be friends when he asked though

>>18047933

I do B and C. I go to parties and people enjoy my presence. I'm in a band and I have a good paying job. I'm trying to buy a house right now. Also, I just flat out have issues so it's not like I'm surprised.

>>18047932
One man fucks thousands of women, while thousands of boys fuck their hands.

Im listening to "Thinking Bout You" as I think about her. Its been a while since we stopped seeing one another besides where we meet weekly. This song basically describes me and her. I have mixed feelings about seeing if she is free tomorrow, but I heard she's dating someone now. I need to get out of this feel zone.

>>18047923
>I gave him my number and told him to text or call if he ever wanted to hang out or talk.

That's not asking him out bud.

Leaving it all up to him is a big mistake, especially if he's as autistic and awkward as you seem to be.

From experience I can tell you for a fact, men asking women to hang out with them is not as effective as a woman asking a man to hang out with them, men will literally drop everything there doing if a woman asks them to hang out because it's such a rare thing, just putting that out there.

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>>18047982
Supply and demand.

Compare the number of times one man can ejaculate with the number of times one woman can give birth. Then, ponder the fact that a country can lose 80% of its men but still repopulate if it has 100% of its women.

One dude goes around fucking all the women while the rest ya'll just jerk it to cartoons.

>>18047982
He hasn't even texted once, just to text. If he initiated even a little bit, I'd pounce.

But if this is what it's going to be like, maybe we're not very compatible anyway. I'm insecure and need to feel wanted, at least a little.

>>18048020
guys can feel insecure and unwanted too. why don't you take the initiative and text him first? if his replies are short or sporadic then you can know he's really not interested and drop it

honestly i used to be like you. i've found i've been in more and better relationships when i try to take the initiative with a guy every once in a while, even if it means i'll sometimes get rejected

>>18048020
Used to be the third date last century, now it's the second. By this point if stuff isn't working then you're wasting your time.

>>18048026
I did text him a few times (3 if I remember correctly) at first. One time he didn't answer and the other two we had nice but short conversations and he seemed happy to talk.

He has never initiated texting.

I feel like it would be autistic to ask him out now. I already consider myself rejected and have mostly gotten over it. Valentine's Day has just opened the wound a bit.

I do wish I had just asked him out right away when I first met him. I made excuses about how I wasn't ready to date anyone and stuff. I won't make the same mistake with the next guy because this sucks.

>>18048036
Hmm yeah sounds like he might not be interested then. I'm sorry to hear that anon, I'm sure you'll find someone else

I wish I could convince people to be as happily single as I am.

Tomorrow is a non-factor to me. Being single is liberating and pleasant, unless I meet the exact right person. I don't worry about anyone being there for me. I used to, but I got into a relationship, and realized I was happier solo.

May you all feel better tomorrow, or the day after.

If anyone wants happy advice about being single, I'm willing to answer, but I'm not sure it's wanted.

>>18048044
Yeah, what annoys me is that he sometimes acts weird around me in person. Like the other day, he had put his stuff down at the table as if he was going to sit in that spot so I specifically took a spot a few spaces away from him to be respectful and avoid him. He picked up his stuff and moved to the seat next to me and proceeded to look at me half the session. I wish he'd either just leave me alone or talk to me already. I'm considering dropping the group because I'm just tired of the mixed signals.

He doesn't seem autistic outside of this sort of behavior at all. He's very well liked, funny, and popular. I kind of feel like whenever I start pulling away, he starts acting like this.

>>18048051
Feel free to share. I am usually a-ok single. The past couple of years have just been rough in more ways than just romantic ones.

>>18048036
And you know he doesn't the feel the same way you do why?

If you think your already rejected just hammer the final nail in the coffin now, because if he actually likes you but is too autistic to do anything and you end up with someone else, how do you think he will feel?

Since it's Valentines you have the ultimate weapon
>"Hey it's valentines day but I have no valentines, what about you?"

This statement gives lots of options.
He can either say "I don't", or "I don't but I could be your valentine"
Or if he says the first one then you can just straight up ask him.
Literally nothing to lose since you can just blame it on the day and it won't be awkward no matter what happens.

I know I'm really drilling this in, but I was literally in this guys position before, too autistic to ask my girlfriend out because I've never talked to girls once in my life before, but she asked me out so it all worked.

>>18048069
I'm sorry, I'm not trying to be a dick, but if he wants to be with me, he needs to do something, anything on his part.

It is not and was not easy for me to put myself out there, and if he's not interested, that's fine (but he needs to stop buzzing around me in person then). But if he is interested, he needs to put himself out there too.

I don't think I'm asking for much.

At this point, I feel like I absolutely need to leave him alone. If someone continued to text me even though I was showing the signs this guy is showing, I'd be pretty pissed.

>>18048051
Honestly, I don't think I would know what to do if I got the girl. Deep down I think I'm worthless. I've tried fixing it but I don't know if I ever will. I would be okay with the fact I'm forever alone if everyone I knew wasn't getting married or at least getting girlfriends.

I wish I could just not feel anything or return to nothing.

>>18048061

Sure, no problem. I feel I'm a little older than most of /adv/ (30), and I've been through a lot, and have seen a lot from my friends and family. I'd pursued the perfect romantic relationship for so long, and had been in a couple of relationships, but I finally met the girl that matched everything I wanted.

And that's when it struck me, not that she was a bad person, but "what I wanted" was this mysterious, fake thing. She was delightful for most, but being defined by a relationship, needing to answer to someone, needing to consider our feelings all the time, and not being able to go do what I wanted all the time, was super restrictive.

I can explore the world, and spend time with my friends, exclusively on my terms, and its lovely.

I've never really liked Valentine's day. I went to a school where classes would do Valentine's day handouts in class (everyone gave each other Valentine's/candy)

I was always the kid who went home empty handed at the end of the day which cemented a distaste for the holiday from childhood. I wasn't a popular kid.

Near the end of high school with my first Valentine's with a girlfriend she cheated on me on fucking Valentine's so that made my distaste permanent. I just don't "celebrate" Valentine's, I stay in and do stuff for myself.

>>18048051
>Being single is liberating and pleasant
I guess this is true for those who have had results in the dating game. Feeling "forced" to be single because f constant rejection blows.

>>18047654
I dated a girl for six years and never celebrated valentine's. Thinking about it now would be just as silly as thinking about it then.

>>18048163

I'm the guy you're replying to, but I find that even people who have had success are serially unhappy because they tie this into their view of themselves.

Me and her.
Yesterday, I went to her room (dorm). She was sitting alone, because her roommates left for holidays. I brought wine.
"What's the occasion Anon?", "No occasion, just wanted to drink it."
We sat drinking wine having fun for 4 hours.
It got late, she got tired, I tried making moves, but I felt she wasn't giving me any option to do so.
We stood up and I was leaving. On the goodbye we had a small moment, being close, feeling each others warmth. And I left.
On the next day that is today, I came back to tell her what I feel. She straight up rejected me. Telling me I have no chance with her.
I had some women in my life. I got rejected by the person I truly loved once already. This time I'm mature, good looking, and not so poor. This time it hurts like true living hell.
I was fighting with myself to got to her and tell her how I feel for hours. Thinking to myself "It's either I loose everything, or win everything.", I lost everything.
In my life there were really no true happy moments. There were achievements. Getting to good schools, the end. Never made a lot of friends, still I reject the purpose of a friend. A person to tell my family problems? Fuck that... Might as well tell them to a wall.
Now my little sparkle of hope got crushed. I lost any joy in life I had. I don't want to continue this living hell. It's mesmerizing what happy lives people live. Telling me all the happy and full of action events they have in their daily lives. What do i have? drinking with people I don't really care about. Telling stories of others' people adventures.

>>18048535
cont
Lately I just get to watch how people get together and leave.
People leave me. The same way my brother with which I lived for 18 years. Suddenly got a wife and left me *poof* gone. Now we rarely call eachother. Then my friends left me. I'm alone with people I barely like and for the next half a year I'm supposed to find myself a flat.
I've been there. Living in a room alone for a year. Tragic. Now I'll have a whole cramped house for myself.
Some time ago I noticed a funny thing about life. It has no purpose. It begins on molecular level. Things just attract other things. There is no magic in it. ATP gets sucked in the places it needs to be, then it powers things and gets other things moving. It's a big machine. Then we see that a cell is a machine, and an organism is a machine, and a human is a machine. Where is the place for a soul.
Why do I have to suffer so much? When will I obtain this beautiful happiness that everyone is talking about? Why is that that she is with that dude which is shit compared to me and I am sitting here bawling to a fucking forum? Why is my life joyless.

>>18048537
I detest the fact that I'm depressed yet again. I'm tired of being sad, literally tired. I feel like I want to wreck shit around myself but I feel that it will only make me look like a fool. I cannot do anything with the pain inside me. I feel like I want to feed it by writing about it.

I'm just getting over a breakup (literally took me over a year) and now I met someone I really like. We hit it off good but after I started spaghettying it up. Now I'm gonna ask her to be my Valentine's and I got a good feeling I'll be rejected. Just yesterday I told her I love hanging out with her and she said "is that so?". Outlook is not good.

>>18047711
>male
>have sister
>all cousins are female
>I'm the only one that's alone
>I'm the oldest of all of them

>>18049178
Quit thinking about stinky Alabama love, and get your ass out into the happy hunting grounds.

And work on your fitness, too.

She made a mistake and cheated on me... I broke up with her, and she finally realized the consequences to her actions.

If she could take them back, she would.. If I could forgive her for them.. I would too.

We tried to make it work, but I was too damaged from it all, I had to call it off.

It sucks to think last year at this time, she was getting the flowers I sent to her office, and the years before that we were sharing wine and chocolate and watching netflix on the couch with candles.. But, this year.. She's alone, all of her co-workers are getting flowers, her best friend is dating a guy that almost resembles me, and I'll be drunk as soon as I get off work.

Why'd she mess up a great thing? We were perfect.. We wanted to get married, we wanted to move in together, we had everything going for us. Both making great money, neither of us wanted kids, we were going to be retired wealthy by the time we were 40..

But, she was troubled, she had no confidence in herself and needed other men to validate her.. I don't get why I wasn't enough.. I told her she was beautiful everyday, until I found out what she did to me.. Even though I tried to forgive, and I really did.. I couldn't.

I was resentful, I started cheating on her behind her back in revenge. I realized my destructive behavior, and broke up with her.. Why couldn't she have just done the same? Even after I caught her messages, all she could do was deny the entire thing..

I know she's truly remorseful now.. But, why couldn't she have been then?

>>18049201
NEVER take a cheater back. Any major slight you've chosen to accept, is one you've chosen to permit indefinitely. Also people don't change their stripes; everyone says they will but nobody actually does. You can quit crack, but you'll never quit being a crackhead.

>>18049192
>stinky Alabama love
I think you got the wrong idea, anon.

Anyways, I am trying to better myself. The problem is that I have so much shit I need to work on before I'm even ready for a relationship.

Been a bit over a year since we broke up
I still think about her but have definitely moved on
It took a long time but I feel ready to move on for now, for real

>>18047909

>he won't ask you out because a guy getting rejected by a girl he's close with is literally the worst feeling ever

I've got that atm. Year ago started liking best friend. Asked her out and she said no. Last saturday she started flirting with me when drunk and has been acting differently when we chat on snapchat. Literally too scared of her putting me down again to do shit

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>>18047872
> social circle has no girls

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You have no idea..

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This is how I found out I'd be spending Valentine's day alone

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>>18047654
Not that anyone cares, but today might mark the day that a 3 year relationship ends. Fucking valentines day boys. My life is pretty low right now.

>>18050140
Would it be you ending it?

>>18050141
Its a 3 (4 on and off) year shitstorm of us trying to make things work over and over. With our families at eachothers throats, my worklife being really demanding. Her anxiety limiting us to nothing. I havent even scraped the top, but today was a pretty huge blow out. It would be mutual but out of desperation/her giving up i believe.

>>18050155
Awwe I'm sorry that sucks.

I shouldn't even begin to get my hopes up about you, you fuck up birthdays, you fuck up christmas, you ducked up New Years, well now I guess it ain't no surprise you fucked up another holiday because you won't include anything unless is directly benefits you, you selfish cunt.

>>18050195
Lol

>>18050195
Want to vent?

>>18050123
What's going on there?