I have a question to couples living together. How many times

A few times a year

I can't even tell if the problem is me or her anymore

>>18042693
From 2 times a week to multiple times a day depending on how stressed/busy we are.
Most of the time, 3-4 times a week.

Why don't you want to fuck? Are you just stressed, or it is enough for you, or something changed when you moved in together?

>>18042698
how long have you been together?

>>18042693
Tell her to wear a push-up bra and short skirts around the house. Fuck, Now I've got a boner.

>>18042703
I just don't feel aroused. As I said it's not because I don't find her attractive anymore. I don't feel like fucking other women either.

>>18042710
Do you fuck LESS than before pr the same amount? Did something else change in your life? How was the relationship this far?

>>18042709
This might work. Sweatpants and hoodies aren't very sexy.

>>18042704
LDR for 3 years, living together for over 4

On one hand I probably have too many fetishes and am too picky about what turns me on but on the other I always find her too vanilla and unwilling to take an active role (girls aren't meant to be that interested in sex in her mind it seems) so I struggle to distinguish the experience from fucking a doll or just jerking off which is less effort

>>18042713
It's not less, It's the same amount. It's just that I thought it would be more. No significant change about my life. Relationship is alright too, with the little exception that a few dickheads were flirting with her about a month ago, but we talked about it and she stopped comunicating with them.

>>18042719
stop watching porn

>>18042722
Maybe that's just the amount of sex you need to be happy.
Make sure to keep things sexy and interesting in your relationship: be attractive around each other, be in shape, be intimate overall. But if that's just what you need to be satisfied, then don't push it.

>>18042726
Just lower my standards and settle you mean?

I would rather just find someone else

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I've been married a long while. Sex is 2-5x a week with the ups and downs that happen, of course. Illness, stress, lack of opportunity, etc all affect that.

People are fairly variable. Some have sex more out of boredom, or to combat stress, and for others boredom or stress causes dry spells.

Health and wellness do affect sex, especially as you age. My wife and I both find that if we abuse our bodies through excess food and drinking, it affects my libido. When we focus a bit more on healthy eating and lifestyle, sex invariably picks up in quality/quantity.

OP, are you eating shitty, smoking weed, stressed, bored, unhappy, etc?

Jesus, I never thought I'd be one of those assholes preaching about living clean, but it does affect shit, esp, as you age, btb.

The opposite side of that coin is in the quality of your relationship outside of sex. Pair bonding, overall satisfaction, your level of intimacy, shit like that. Do you see a future with her where things are better in terms of your goals together, or the same? What I mean is, are you happy, content, bored, in love, etc?
Those things will affect men, too. If you're getting bored or apathetic, your sex life can get mechanical, which is boring.
Food for thought.

>>18042693
once, maybe twice a week usually

i'd do it every day if i could, maybe twice but she's never into it.

:(

>>18042730
so what you're saying is you're not attracted to your gf

>>18042731
>OP, are you eating shitty, smoking weed, stressed, bored, unhappy, etc?

Nah I'm trying to be as healthy as I can be. There's occasionally a bag of chips or some chocolate, but nothing too crazy.

I hate weed and stoner culture as a whole.

My study is kinda stressful (med.student), but I'm used to it so I doubt that's the problem.

>>18042745
I'm attracted to her aesthetically but we do not click sexually

>>18042731
Forgot to say that our relationship is ok out of the sex. We're practically best friends, tell each other everything, we get along with our families. I don't feel madly in love like a schoolboy, but instead it feels like a bond that cannot be broken. I'm not sure if I'm making any sense, but basically it's only the sex part that bothers me.

>>18042749
so what is it that you don't want to "settle" for? someone who won't indulge your fetishes ?

>>18042760
Someone who is only going to spread their legs and wait for me to finish each time

>>18042693
Been with my fiancee for 4 years now. We have sex about 3 times a week on average, probably. But it's variable. Every now and then there'll be a week where we're tired or stressed or whatever and don't have sex at all. But it's matched by periods where we both hit weird hormonal spikes and fuck twice a day.

I'm unclear on what your situation is, exactly, though, OP. When you have sex 2-3 times a week, do you actually want to, or are you kinda forcing yourself? Basically, if you didn't factor your girlfriend's needs and wants into it at all, would you be having sex 2-3 times a week, or 0?

If 0, how long has your libido been this low? I assume not your whole life, right?

Wanting to have sex 2 or 3 times a week is perfectly fine and normal, a bit low for some people, but well within what I'd call a normal range. Not wanting to have sex at all makes me think there's something actually wrong.

>>18042765

okay so, I guess the only thing you can do is to try and have a calm and open discussion about it. explain what you want... don't argue or get upset. That's really the only thing you can do. Tell her what's on your mind

>>18042777
Will do

I guess I'll parachute out of this marriage if that doesn't work

>>18042771
2-3 is fine for me and I wouldn't be forcing myself. Maybe libido is lower too, because before we moved in, the nights we didn't have sex I fapped, while now I just go to sleep.

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Well at least I'm not in the bottom 1.6% of married 25-29 year old men...

>>18042796
Weird. Married couples have more sex than partnered.