Ask the opposite gender anything

Girls

Why would you not call a guy by any sorta name? (NIckname or given name)

What could cause a girl to start to get close with a guy, only to become distant again, then to become closer again almost like a repesting cycle?

How do I make sense of a woman's behavior?

I met with a casual partner who told me we couldn't possibly be together; met her today. She usually doesn't text me first or doesn't say a whole lot. We went out today trying to keep it platonic and at the end I told her "You look fucking hot today" complimenting her clothes.

She proceeded to send me a bunch of texts and wouldn't shut up even though I gave half assed replies or tried to stop it outright. What does she actually want? First pushing me away and just one compliment changed her behavior that much.

>>18034070
Phrasing, what is this question even asking?

Do you mean a girl has never used your name/nickname? Or do you mean that she has said she refuses to use your name(s)?

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A guy I have been friends with for years through our mutual friend circle sent me a picture of his dick today via snapchat. I considered it may be an accident but the response was to a very innocent conversational snap with a response for me.

I am in a relationship. He is completely aware of this. (My partner is aware of what happened)

Why would he send me it if he knows I am in a committed relationship?
How should I react to this?

>>18034070
My boyfriend and I don't really call each other anything, unless we need to get each other's attention. We just don't need to

>>18034077
>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.

>>18034088
>Why?
Because he is into you and thinks you want to see pics of his dick.

>how should I react?
With disgust. You have a bf remember?

>>18034074
Either playing hard to get or getting close to you made them uninterested, and then being insecure/desperate made them come back.

Either way a sign of high maintenance or unsustainability. If they're not the most shy person you know then gtfo.

girls,
do you own sex toys?
how many/what kind?
how old were you when you got your first one and how did you get it? (gift, get it yourself in a sexshop, over the internet, etc)
do you think getting one for a SO is a good idea? why? if yes which one do you recommend?

>>18034088
blocking him and cutting contact. That's if you care about your boyfriend. If you don't do whatever the fuck you whores like to do.

>>18034099
For what it's worth, she is one of she shyiest people I know. So that could be a factor?

>>18034091
True. I am probably over thinking it, but we really are not close friends or anything. Even in person if I needed her attention for something it's just hey and nothing else

>>18034088
It wasn't an accident. You know an accident when someone reels back immediately. Tell him to stop now.

>>18034081
I mean it seems like she just never uses it at all. She probably does it subconsciously

>>18034104
1. Yes
2. Like 3 - 1 normal vibrator that I don't really use, a G spot vibrator that I also don't really use, and a good, ol' fashioned Hitachi with various attachments hence why I don't use the other two vibrators
3. I don't remember.. In college sometime, I definitely bought it online
4. Sure. I would get something like a bullet vibrator though, definitely something the two of you can use together rather than one she would just use on herself. And you can always *ask her*

>>18034115
How often do you call your friends by their names?

It's pretty rare. I'll do it to get someone's attention but almost never in conversation.

Guys
Some friend of mine was flirting a lot with me but when I pushed and asked him out on a date, he said he met someone else but "they are finding out where they stand" and that he can't say more than that.
That he thinks I'm really hot, that we click amazing, that in clever and smart and he's sure there's a guy for me somewhere.

So message clear, no dates for us and he softened the blow, but why would someone start flirting in the first place then? And turn me down for such an obscure reason?

Guy here
Is it possible for you girls to be taken seriously still? like loyalty and all that or should it just be a shit show on both sides

>>18034128
I guess. Though usually happens once in a while?

I mean, I cant remember a single time we used each others name

>>18034148
Girls generally? I don't know. Me personally? Sure, why not? I'm an individual, not representative of my gender.

>>18034134
keeping you on edge so he can fall back on you if things dont turn out well for this other chick. Kinda shitty.

Are any of you semi-attractive, over 20, and still a virgin? I don't mean in instance that you never had the chance, but has anyone had standards that haven't been met yet that they upheld? I just wonder if there are decently looking people who had the chance in HS or college and actually decided not to put out like a slut. If you've gotten the chance and turned it down, I want to know. I feel like I'm the only guy who's ever gotten the opportunity a few times and turned them down out of dis-interest. I haven't met someone I felt comfortable fucking and it's not a priority that I ever really cared about. Now that I'm in my early 20's, if that time comes I'm not much more interested knowing every decent chick has already been plowed by some dude they took a fling on.

>>18034153
Why are you hung up on this? You say you aren't particularly good friends with her or anything.

It doesn't mean anything dude. It just means you don't talk with her enough to have one of those statistically rare conversations where she has used your name.

>>18034134
it's called "shotgun approach", also women don't usually ask for dates so it's not like he was expecting you to answer like that

>>18034158
I started to have this feeling too. Fuck being a fall back girl, I deserve better.

>>18034148
the fuck are you talking about

>>18034166
Shotgun approach?

>>18034168
I've had girls that will dress up in scrubs in front of their man so they could fuck and then go to work at a strip club
The question wasnt rocket surgery

>>18034161
I guess I am mostly looking for clues as to where I stand with her. As she seems to give off mixed signals

>>18034171
>A shotgun approach, in the context of marketing, is a strategy where a promotional campaign for products or services targets as large of an area or population as possible.
basically he flirts with everyone and goes with whichever reciprocate to his advances first or he likes the most.
I would bet this girl he was talking about is someone you two know in common.

>>18034175
What do those things have to do with one another? What?

>>18034179
You're acquaintances. Friendly but not friends. Mystery solved.

>>18034159
I don't know if you're asking guys or girls, but I'm a girl who was a KLV until the age of 21. It wasn't really because of high standards, more because I had never really met anyone I clicked with before that.

>>18034181
Eh. I still think we might atleast be a bit more than acquaintances given how long we can talk for without issue. My issue concerning where exactly I am is due to her shyness

>>18034159
The idea that if someone ever fucked that automatically turns them in a slut is ridiculous.

Your mentality is deeply unattractive.

>>18034188
Just because some chick can hold a conversation does not mean she wants the D.

You're gunna need to supply more information on what the relationship is like if you want a more informed opinion of where you stand. Do you talk outside of how you know each other? Friends on social media? Are you up til 2am texting every day? Do you spend time together doing other things?

>>18034181
"Can you guys be taken seriously?"
"Loyalty" etc.

Proof to keep treating them like hoes or not

>>18034194
Here's a green text summarizing it.

>Fall for her
>She would randomly sit next to me in mostly empty rooms
>Talk to her, we are friendly enough
>Try asking her to lunch
>Say yes, but drags a guy friend along
>Awkward lunch. Guy friend hits on her, and she wants nothing to do with it. (Ends up breaking contact for an unknown reason with him)
>Nothing happens after
>I catch her staring at me, and occasionally she doesn't look away, instead we just stare into each other eyes for a few seconds.
>She still never texts me first, but she will keep the conversation going if I do text her. Sometimes for 6-10 hrs.
>Sometimes when we text, she would slip in specific mentions the she will be free at a specific time. But I never pick up on them until it is long past then.
>I sometimes slip in jokes that kinda tease her. No one finds them funny, but she still laughs. She sometimes teases me similarly
>She Makes it a point to try an push me to become an EMT. (she's currently one)
>She is always seeming willing to meet up, says "Definitely!" and "We can always give it a shot!" but will never commit to an actual day. But she seems kinda disappointed.
>Sometimes does not respond to stuff where I try meeting up (Date like or otherwise.)

>>18034180
No I'm certain I don't know her, and I'm pretty sure there are valid concerns to them dating (like her being a preacher's daughter and him being an atheist) so I just wondered why the hell he would flirt while being tied up in another thing.
Another poster suggested the fall back thing so I'm glad I just went straight autism and asked for a yes/no type answer.

>>18034203
well better just flirt and turn you down that actually dating multiple people at the same time.

Can I ask how old are you?

>>18034202
>brings a third wheel to a lunch date, and someone she clearly didn't like at that
>doesn't text first
>never wants to actually meet up

N O T I N T E R E S T E D

>>18034213
She is extremely shy. Only seems to have a couple people she speaks to.
Some people mentioned that the third wheel could been to make it a little less awkward as we both knew him.
The never initiating is still said to be common with shy girls. Especially if they carry on a lengthy conversation.
And the not meeting up part could be her nerves acting up aswell.

And the other typical signs of randomly showing up next to me, staring and locking eyes and shit mean nothing?


Also, she did loose a lot of weight and has loose skin, so she might be insecure about it

>>18034224
Ask her out or move on because all of this meaningless speculation you're doing is going to kill you. No one here can tell you what her opinion of you is.

>>18034224
Dude, you're over thinking this so much.
"Listen Anonette, I like you and I would like to go out on a date with you - just me and you this time! would you meet me at 9 at this café on this day?"
Done. Finish.

>>18034229
>>18034232
If it was only that simple with her. It seems like with her it's almost best to take it slow and not try rushing it.

>>18034237
How long have you been going on? Months, right? I have read your posts here since December.
I know people who got married quicker than you managed to ask this chick out on a date. Just do it. Stop over thinking this bullshit.

>>18034224
Here's some unkind food for thought, cunt.

At 17/18 I was working retail and there was a pretty but shy girl there who was and is still the shyest girl I've ever met, and she was the one to ask me on a date. She could have done better and she made that first move anyway.

If a girl likes you she will make the effort.

>>18034209
30, he's in his 30ies too.

>>18034159
Me, I'm in my mid twenties and am a virgin. Never had a gf but I could have had about 4.

I'm sterile and you better not lie to me.

A girl I work with might like me.

She seems to gravitate towards me to talk a lot, teases, always blushing around me, will wait around to walk and talk with me, stuff like that.

Am I wrong in my guess? Only way to know for sure is to ask but I'm absolutely shit at reading people/social situations. she will also only talk to the other guys in our work in passing and doesnt go out of her way to be around them/talk to them.

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>>18034067
Girls that wear chokers, are you really that much of a slut or you only wear them because you think they look good?

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>Girls
Why the FUCK do you keep using this cancerous filter on yourself?

>>18034329
I think they look good. I'm not a slut and I also don't like anal, but I guess they're worn more often by alternative types who tend to be more unconventional with everything else they do as well.

>>18034352
I don't use it but it slims down your jaw and makes your eyes look bigger.

>>18034352
Changes your facial shape to be more attractive and the nose and ears tend to distract from any facial asymmetry. Also smooths your skin. It's like the filter that is your best self but hides it behind the dog ears and nose so that it's not too obvious.

>>18034364
Fair enough. Gives me more incentive not to communicate with those people.
Thanks for the info!

>>18034329
I don't wear them, but most girls who wear them because they're a fashion trend right now. You won't see girls wearing them 6 months from now.

I met a girl through a language exchange app. I'm going to study in her country for a full year as exchange student, still half a year left to go

When talking she was the one that started talking sexually. In the end we planned to be "sex friends", we were making plans that were mainly sexual, and everyday we'd sext (without revealing pics tho), she'd tell me by herself all the things she would want to do etc

then out of the blue she's telling me she feels like just a toy, and that i don't want anything more out of her. i told her i just want a normal friendship in which we could have sex

so what's the deal, how do i act in this kind of situation. i already told her that i understand and that i dont want her to feel bad

How much is too much to spend on a significant other?

>>18034496
You spend however much you are comfortable spending. If they're your SO, it shouldn't matter to them how much you spent

>>18034329
What exactly do they mean? I hear they have a meaning but I don't actually know what it is.

Shy guy here.
If you liked a shy guy enough, would you make the first move, or is that taboo?

>>18034552
I don't walk up to people or ask people out on a date, but I always make it really obvious if I like a guy - I flirt heavily, get touchy, etc. If he doesn't do anything, I just move on.

Girls

what would you rather want your bf to jerk off to?

Softcore/glamour models or hardcore/pornstars.

>>18034582
hardcore, who watches softcore?

>>18034586
I do, i dont like fake moaning/screaming and other bullshit hardcore is filled with.

Softcore are filled with nice tits or ill just find some thong fat ass twerking videos to jerk to.

Can some long time lurkers explain to me what are the main reasons or all the reasons why girls cheat on their bf?

lack of passion?
boredom?

do girls cheat on their bf because they think like males (to engage in lots of sex) or is mainly becuse of a lack of emotional fullfilment they have with their current bf (again, boring relationship)?

>>18034588
OOHH HYEESSS YESSS YESS FUCK MY PUSSSAAAYYY OOOOOOUUUUUU


God. Whoever thought that was a good idea needs to be shot. More than once. By a fucking cannon.

>>18034588
That' so vanilla it's sad.

>watching retarded porn with screaming and moaning
>watching porn with the sound on

>>18034590
Based on the times I've been cheated on:

>Emotionally unstable
Correlates ex or very close friend to positive feelings and seeks it out

>Feeling wanted
Being together for a long time, and a sudden realization or nostalgia factor that makes them think back to how things used to be and seek out the exhilaration they felt when you first met through friends that are sexually pushy

>Thrill
Trying new things/ hearing about a hung guy and going see what it's like.

They all hurt fairly equally.

>>18034603
http://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/guide/why-do-women-cheat?page=3

>emotionally unstable
emotionally weak female seeking for alpha dick.

>feeling wanted
they want a romantic mediterranean lover

>thrill
want that muscular guy that is socially extroverted.

Am I right?

So, as long as you're an alpha guy, girls won't cheat on you, right?

>>18034615
That isn't necessarily true.

None of these points really have anything to do with the individual themselves, more the state of the relationship, and the mental state of the partner. Being attractive or alpha wouldn't exempt you from this.

On a further note, Alphas don't settle down with a single woman to begin with, so technically it wouldn't be possible to be cheated on perse.

I'm simply saying that certain circumstances can make the grass seem greener on the other side, even if that may not be the case. Be it curiousity, complacency, or weakness.

>>18034629
yeah, but like I said, it seems to me, 80-90% of the males I see on my college are simple weak betas, including professors and so on, most are boring, lack any real passion, poor or average social skill, submissive.

a lot of red flags, I'm sure girls do get them as bf to secure a nice boy, meanwhile they will cheat on him for the thrill of sex.

I'm sure this has evolutionary biological reasons, but none of your arguments prove me otherwise.

It seems to me, and my goal is of course to become alpha (which is possible) that girls wont cheat on you and even will see you with diferent girls as a sign of having attractive genes or dominance or social skill.

Hey Guys,

Question, when it comes to sex, what percentage of work do you think you do compared to your partner? As a male do you think you should be doing more, less, or equal amount? If it doesn't meet your standards is it reason for breakup? Or is it good as long as you finish up?

I'm pretty lazy when it comes to sex, I kinda just sit there and try and look and sound cute, (very submissive type), I'll go down on him if kinda nudged to do so but stamina wise don't expect much with that or with me on top. (physically weak in most aspects).

I'm just wondering because mossy of my boyfriends had absolutely no issue with how I am and they enjoyed the sex for the most part, but my current boyfriend likes to compare me to his ex which I find irritating and kind of insulting.

>>18034637
It depends from guy to guy, I guess.
If it doesn't meet my standards, I really don't care.
Sounds like your BF cares however.

>>18034637
simply don't try to be a fucking stick.
we have when we see the girl is not showing any sign.
fuck sake girl, we are expected to make you cum and you show no sign of enjoyment.

also pls don't fake your orgasm, that really hurts.

just be honest, we appreciate honesty.

>>18034644
>just be honest, we appreciate honesty.
Unless we suck too much.

>>18034644

Yeah I don't fake that's pretty low to do, I don't want to lie to the man. XD I try to not be too much of a log, but honestly I don't really care if I finish or not, I just prefer that he does, and I tell him that all the time. Just dunno if that makes him upset or happy, guess it depends on how Alpha he wants to be about it

>>18034649
simply try to teach him how you would like to fuck.
some of us are really beggineers, jesus christ.

we need a little of help.

>>18034650
you need to be honest.

I'm sure girls would like if a partner is also honest with them.

>>18034552
I'm European and girls here can be more direct. I'll imply and flirt and maybe even become touchy-feely, and if he still doesn't get it I might ask him out to grab a coffee or something. But id rather have the guy do it, and if he doesn't show other initiative (like pick the restaurant / coffee place) I might drop it.

>>18034477
I think this could be/is a case where she wants more than just lewds and some friendship and because that doesn't seem to happen she's cut it short.

Scroll back through your chats and see if she's been complimenting you a lot or leaving the door open for you to compliment her on anything, if she's implying feelings or trying to get you to say something like that.

>>18034650
Do you usually achieve orgasm vaginally or like... Clit stuff? I know some girls who only like clit stimulation to orgasm. Sometimes p in the v doesn't hit the spot and you need more. Or do you not care about orgasming in general?

>>18034666
>some girls
Most girls, Satan

I come from simple PIV and hard pumping and according to the guys I slept with I'm a unicorn.

>>18034661
>But id rather have the guy do it

Why? Because you don't have to risk rejection or because you feel like that's the way it should be?

>>18034675
being able to go after what you want, and courage, is a character trait I highly value in a man.

Think of it, the shy guy that manages to get his shit together and ask you out has done a really tough and brave thing. That's admirable.
The beta who's just happy to have his girl decide what to do is not for me.

>>18034666
Ummm I'm actually really backwards with that cause penetration is usually what does it, that and nipple stuff. But I mean normally I don't care. I usually have sex just to please him. That's my goal, just sucks when he starts saying stuff like, my ex enjoyed anal we did it all the time or about how he made her throw up from oral or whatever the case. Like how much am I supposed to do? Most of my past bf's did most of the work, didn't need to do anything fancy, and the enjoyed themselves and never told me I wasn't active enough. I'm just wondering if it's normal for guys to do most if the work or do I just suck immensely.

Girls, I'm trying okcupid. Why is everyone so fucking dry when I talk to them? This is how every interaction goes:

>match with someone
>first to message
>if they respond, start chatting
>be the entire driver of the conversation - asking questions, making jokes
>they just give really cold, two word responses, usually end up being along the lines of "haha yeah"
>eventually just stop because it starts to feel like i'm pushing it too hard when they obviously don't really want to talk that much

Should I be giving up on these and trying to find one who's actually willing to try or is it not that creepy if i persist with the cold girls?

>>18034669
Haha me too, I always thought I was weird for it. XD

>>18034540
as far as I recall it kinda kicked off during the french revolution, with female revolutionaries wearing red ribbons around their necks to pay tribute to the people executed by guillotine. it was adopted some time later by prostitutes as a calling card and grew from there into a trend among the upper classes and royalty of the late 1800's before dying out.

since the collar necklaces of the 1940's it's been revived every 20 years or so in different incarnations

>>18034683
Just find someone who is just as interested sounding. If a girl likes you enough she probably won't shut up and you'll be trying to ignore her instead lol

>>18034682
Mentioning his ex is a total dick move, especially in regards to sexual things. Im a fellow female (btw). When it comes to how much work, do you not like going on top ever? Do you buck back? If you are just having sex missionary and you are fine with that but he isn't, you are going to have to talk to him about whether it's a deal breaker or not. Also, who throws up from getting oral...?

>>18034682
>I usually have sex just to please him.

This drives me insane. Not in the good way.

Whaddafuck person. Learn to enjoy sex.

>>18034634
It won't work, women will spot your insecurity faster than laser guided sharks. Not that it's hard to. It's incredibly obvious you're horribly insecure. Maybe you should find some self- confidence, before starting a relationship?

Girls:

Why are you all such cunts?

>>18034244
True. Thousands I would say it's possible that the girl may act like this one at first, only to suddenly change and ask you out almost a complete 180.

That's actually what happened to my friend. The girl would actually ghost him for a week or so. Now they are basically about to go out next week as an actual date.. And she's the one who asked him out

>>18034756
Because we hate you. Like, you specifically.

>>18034240
Eh.. I actually did sorta ask her out that first time. And that was maybe two weeks after I properly fell for her.

But yea, this has been going on for months, almost a year. But she seems like the nervous type so I need to maybe not rush it with her

Beard or no beard?

>>18034077
>casual partner
You asked for it.

>>18034104
>do you own sex toys?
Yes
>how many/what kind?
A few vibrators, butt plugs, leather restraints, silicone cock sleeves
>how old were you when you got your first one and how did you get it? (gift, get it yourself in a sexshop, over the internet, etc)
When I turned 18 I went to a sex shop and bought it myself.
>do you think getting one for a SO is a good idea? why? if yes which one do you recommend?
Yes and no. If you have to ask, you probably don't know their tastes well enough to know what they want. Do a surprise trip to the sex store together or browse online and see what sparks her interest.

>>18034582
Whatever floats his boat.

>>18034756
>>18034761
It's true, we had a meeting.

>>18034817
Depends usually. I prefer a nicely groomed beard.

>>18034074
Any more ideas?

>>18034758
Though I would say*

19 male here. I've been thinking of being in a relationship. If ask "are you a virgin?", is it right for me to say yes even though I lost it when I was 7-8 years old. It's bothering me.

>>18034817
Beard. Always beard. Really, unless your beard is shitty, let it grow.

>>18034898
If you lost it consensually I see no reason for lying. If you didn't it would be understandable not to be upfront about that.

>>18034817

Trimmed low or well kept is ok, Kinda like the goatee look depending on the face. Those super long thick beards are kinda weird for me, though is not a deal breaker

>>18034817
I think women tend to prefer something clean, so either shave or a nice trim.

>>18034911
>>18034909
How do you trim a beard btw? Scissors?

Girls

If you just started dating a guy, he told you he doesn't feel comfortable having sex within the first 2 months of dating, would you be ok with that?

>>18034944
Yeah, for me I waited 6 months for my dude.

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The older I get, the more I get the feeling that I am retarded.
Socially retarded.
I do not understand people, I can't keep a direct conversation.
What I mean and directly say, comes out as a misunderstanding.
Maybe this is a mild problem, but for me it is big enough to be considered a problem.

For an example, I met this one girl in college who had the idea to create a group with me for the next semester and get some proper shit done, I think.
A great idea, so I told her we should continue this over facebook.
In the one hand, I was happy that someone considered me good enough to team up with me.
On the other hand, I was totally flabbergasted.
It wasn't a moment, where I should feel like spaghetti was dropped, it was a too alien concept for me that someone wanted anything to do with me.
She stood there for a moment, like it was an eternity and then she told me she had to go to a class.
Fine by me.
When I told this to my therapist she looked at me like I was born and raised in a solitary high mountain.
She even took the time to explain to me what it might have felt like to her so I could actually understand what I have done: I have with a high probability have dismissed her offer.

Let's be honest. I have no idea, No idea at all at what I am doing let my soul be the wager on my honesty.

How.. do I learn to communicate?
To phrase it in a funnier way:
How to be human bean?

>>18034949

Well that's good to hear. I don't feel comfortable with sex anymore Tbh

>>18034958
That's understandable anon. The important thing is to find someone who cares about you. But also make sure to explain or show her that it's not because of the girl itself, because that might lead to insecurities.

>>18034942
...An electric razor.

Girls and guys

Where do you meet the opposite sex when you're in your late 20s? (26-29).

Excluding bars and clubs.

>>18034966

I'm ok with kissing I guess. But I don't feel comfortable being naked infront of a girl. So I'd rather wait several months

>>18034967
Shit, I don't have those.

>>18034903
I lost it non-consensually, was reserved growing up until recently. I guess I'm just giving virginity a special value. But no one is perfect. Thank you.

Girls

How much would it affect your decision to date someone if you knew they were NEET? I'm 21, but I still take care of my appearance and I sort of have a little bit of an excuse to not be in college this semester, but I'm worried it'll still be seen as a red flag

>>18034969
Besides online dating, you could try church or work. Even if you just make friends there, they might know someone for you

>>18034998
I don't think anybody would actually care. Have you seen screen caps of tinder convos? Most people are just looking for a cute lay.

Personally I wouldn't care if I found them attractive, but I'm a mess right now too.

>>18034998
Not TOO much, especially if he has a decent reason to be a NEET and he isn't planning to just stay like that indeterminately.

>>18035003

Well that's a bit disappointing. I've tried online, but it sucks. My job is a male dominated girls, so no females. And I'm not religious

How can I tell if a girl is checking me out in return, or we just playing the reflectin game. We've all been there, you get caught looking at someone so then you catch them lookin at you and it goes on. Your both just seeing if that person is lookin at you again.

Guys and girls

I've been talking to this girl for over a month (tinder), we dated, hooked up it was cool.
But I've also been talking to this other girl I'm getting along better with.

How do I tell this first girl I'm no longer interested and let her down lightly without her going completely psycho on me and doing some crazy ex shit?

>>18035046
Does she seem like the type to go crazy ex on you?

Begin with taking longer to respond, eventually transitioning into not replying.

Is it weird to give out cards/gifts to my friends on valentines day?
Rather than celebrate having a gf, I'd feel like it would be more fun/meaningful to celebrate friendship.

Like if you got a small gift (not chocolates but like a cool little thing) from your best friend on valentines day, what would that mean to you?
I'm a dude looking for both sex answers cause I have friends of both sexes.

Guys:
How do you feel about girls shaving? Have you ever lied about your feelings about shaving to your girlfriend to protect her feelings?

>>18035079
That's a custom in japan my lad, i don't think west has the obligatory choco mindset yet

>>18034159
Yep 21 and waiting for marriage or an equivalent. I starting my relationship at around 18 and didn't have my first kiss until 19. My SO is the exact same. He had opportunities, but turned them down and wanted to wait. He definitely wouldn't have settled for a non-virgin either, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

>>18035082
I'd prefer it if she shaved, but it's not a big deal. Never lied about it, but then it's never really come up.

So I caught feelings for a friend and decided to ask a mutual friend to help me
But the more I think about it the more I realize the window for her to be interested in me is probably dead. I want to backtrack before I fuck up our friendship but I don't know how I can say this to the friend I requested help from. What do?

>>18034329
>>18034352
Absolute basic-bitchery

>>18035071
Terrible advice. This, if anything, could potentially set off the "crazy ex shit". Be upfront and honest.

>>18035117
Say it to the friend you requested help from.

>>18035123
But that seems awkward

>>18034590
The reason why men and women cheat is because they are bad people. That's it. Some men are bad, some aren't. Some women are bad, some aren't. This is why good partner choice is so terribly important.

>>18035127
Well, how else do you expect to get out of it?

>>18035137
Is it unreasonable to expect me never bringing this up to the mutual friend again to cause the situation to just go away

>>18035138
If you want ease of mind, yes. Every second your friend is left with the impression that you want something to happen between you and this girl, the likelihood of said friend spilling the beans increases.

>>18035079
If you talk about how you're doing something special for all your friends, then that should compensate for any female friends getting worried.

My girlfriend and I have not had sex with eachother yet. Recently she mentioned she wanted to talk about sex.

She says that she's nervous because she doesn't have much experience and that she thinks it will hurt.

She says she's never had a dick fully inside her, because from the experiences she's had in the past, it really hurt, and this made her lose some interest in penetration sex.

She's also worried about pain because she thinks my dick might be too big.

She said she wants this to happen, and we want a sex life together.

Does anyone have advice on how we should approach this?

>>18035082
Are we talking about shaving your legs? Or your vulva? I dont reallt have a problem with hairy pussy, but hairy legs.... I wouldnt be able to do anything with that.

>>18034074
Really? No more ideas?

>>18034074
some people are just like this, with everyone in their life

>>18035154
carefully. talk about what you're going to do and how before you do it and pay attention to her body during

>>18035183
Maybe, but she only seems top do that cycle with me... Other people she remains close with, unless they fuck her over in some way

>>18035190
You could just ask her. That kind of behavior is strange enough to warrant it imo.

>>18035196
I guess. I did ask another question about her, and posted this summary of our relationship >>18034202

It definitely is a bit of a strange relationship even just as friends...

>>18035154
It took my boyfriend and I three days when I lost my virginity to him. I didn't use tampons either.

Go slowly and make sure that she is wet and willing. Make sure that she is completely aware that you will stop if it gets uncomfortable for her.

Foreplay. Foreplay. Foreplay.

Any tips to improve my appearance? Girls and guys.

Excluding plastic surgery and hair implants.

Can't upload webms on adv so external
http://webmshare.com/play/vOv0O

>>18034074
From all your posts(I'm assuming), it just feels like she cycles her friends and the people she wants to hang out with and you're not important to her at that time.

I say shit like "oh yea, we definitely hang out" but never expect to make plans. Make the time to hang out with her and be specific when you want to hang out.

>>18035212
Oh also styles you think would work well with my face and a lankier body type.

>>18035216
Eh that can be possible. But she honestly doesn't have many friends from what I can tell. And she still sorta gives those stares regardless if we happen to be close or distant.

There is also the possibility that she might become insecure about her body when it looks like something might develop? (She does seem to have a little loose skin, but not too much)

Any suggestions what my boyfriend and I can do to swallow him?

I used to love swallowing him and then something turned off that now, I just can't and I hate it.

Any suggestions?

>>18035082
shaving what?
their legs and armpits or just her dirty bits?
to be honest I would prefer it trimmed if you asking about your pubes. Don't really care about your armpits and legs that much but I would also prefer them clean.

>>18035239
have him eat a lot of pineapple

>>18035147
I guess this is logical
If I'm already doubting her reciprocating then its probably for the best that I close this now instead of hoping for a miracle, isn't it?

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Whenever this is brought up, I wonder what guys actually mean by "trimmed" pubic hair.

I have a feeling they think the "triangle" type is trimmed, where there is short hair on the pubic mound, but nowhere else. However, only trimming the hair would result in the bottom right, with short hair covering that radius.

>>18035239
Get him to stop eating so much fucking meat and junk food

>>18035255
>>18035270

Thank you. We did have a come-to-Jesus about his eating habits so we have cut junk food for the past year and trying more lean proteins and he is taking bromelain pills too

I guess it's psychological too coz I anticipate it being salty

>>18035265
bikini lines is the best.

>>18034067

I'm getting mixed signals from a girl. She often over-compliments me about looks or character or whatever, uses phrases like "I would totally eat you", and seems to generally like my company, asking me to walk her home. On the other hand, I asked her to go out in two different occasions. The first, more casually with an art show as excuse, the second, explicitly asking her out because I wanted to go out with her.
But she's busy. And I can clearly see it's mostly true, but usually if a girl can't free her time for you, she's not interested.

Any advice?

>>18034783
A year? Holy fuck dude what are you wasting your time like that for? Either you absolutely asked her out on a date or you *sorta* didn't. And either she's interested and has made a serious effort even just once in a whole year's time or she hasn't.

If you've been serious about all this stuff man you are on the longest road to nowhere with a girl I've ever seen. It's not healthy dude, find someone else.

girls:
2 correlating questions
1. When do you want to be kissed on a date? I tend to have long lasting interesting conversations that I can see the girl enjoys, but I can't figure out how I'm supposed to time the kiss.
2.
When there's a new guy that interests you, you decide to either aim for a relationship with him/ sleep with him or put him in the friendzone aka won't-bang-him
what are some things that influence your decision?
For example some of my female friends I've never dated told me that dudes that don't make moves on dates drop their interest really fast.

Not sure if this is the best place, I have a quick question which doesn't really merit a thread of its own - open to both genders but maybe female perspective would be better?

Since December I've gotten very friendly with a female work colleague - she's in a relationship with a separate colleague, I'm in a 6 year relationship - and I really, really like her. I'm 27, she's 23.

She's called me funny 3 times, has told me she likes my accent and generally is really friendly towards me, I absolutely adore and admire her - I have her as a friend on facebook but would also quite like to keep in touch through phone if possible *as a friend*, as the older I've got most of my own friends are away with their own gf's/fiancees or even children and I like her but we only really speak at work, which isn't all that often.

Should I send her a message on fb that she's welcome to text me if she likes? Along the lines of

>"Hiya [redacted]! That's me F I N A L L Y got me laptop repaired and set up - typing from it right now!! :D Anyway - was thinking that I really rather enjoy seeing and speaking to you in work, and then I remembered that I have this thing called a """mobile phone""" with which we could also communicate - I know, crazy shit. Anyhoo - if you ever want to speak or give us a text to shoot the shit about anything (or indeed send a wee message on here) then my mob no is [redacted]. Hope all is well. Take it easy [redacted]! p.s. if you do decide to get in touch I'd avoid asking me for fashion tips, I mean I'm literally in a football top and pair of Le Coq Sportif trackies right now"

Friendly enough? Creepy? Too much? I dunno, I mean she trusts me enough that I've driven her to her home once before and we definitely get on really well. Or should I just try chatting with her on fb (not great because she doesn't use it much and I don't think she wants to keep her account active much longer due to some hassle)? Asking for her number seems too flirty.

>>18034969
>Where do you meet the opposite sex when you're in your late 20s?

Bars are perfectly reasonable, but--in case you never realized this--different bars will net different results because different kinds of people go to different kinds of bars.

The nerdy bar "esports" always on tv, the "speak easy" that needs a password to get in, the hole in the wall dive bar, and the almost industrial dimly lit bar with music blaring all have completely different clientele, who'd have thunk.

Otherwise, despite the memes, online can work (The majority of me and my friends have done it and met people through it--In fact i'm currently two years in to a relationship from it).

Music festivals, libraries, coffee shops, any downtown in any city where you can just sit at a common location and literally just say "hey, what's up" to someone.

There is no lack of locations to do this shit. What it basically boils down to though is you actually have to have the balls do it, and do it while giving no fucks--because that's usually the key; the more desperate you are the more people can smell it off you and the more they're repelled by it and have their guards up.


>>18035021
>How can I tell if a girl is checking me out in return, or we just playing the reflectin game.

Stop playing like you're 12 and just talk to her.
"Hey, what's up". That's all you really need to do.
If you can't do that much, you're probably never going to talk to her anyway.

This is coming from someone who played that game more times than he can count when he was younger, and then later realized he was just being a dumbass.

>>18035082
>How do you feel about girls shaving?

I prefer things maintained, but also kind of don't give a fuck.

>>18035265
>Whenever this is brought up, I wonder what guys actually mean by "trimmed" pubic hair.

Exactly what I do with my own pubic hair/under arm hair/beard/etc, which is set a trimmer to 3 and making it so I'm not a walking puffball of hair. That's it.

How does one know if a girl is interested or just being friendly?

I have been working with this girl in my grad program a lot and sometimes I can't tell if she is "coming on" to me. She likes to talk to me a lot, has complimented me on my "style." She likes to message me randomly about non-school related stuff, tells me about how I'm funny, and told me yesterday that should would "comment *fire emoji*" on all my pictures of me. Help?

>>18035571
>Friendly enough? Creepy? Too much?

I'm assuming she knows you're in a happy relationship right?

Because if she doesn't by this point, you're kind of fucking up in general.

Otherwise, look man, at the end of the day, if this is someone who you want to be a pal, they're going to have vague sense of who you are at this point, and they're probably going to need to have a basic understanding of how you communicate.

If you're having to worry about every single communication you send over, this person isn't going to be that great of a friend.

That being said, for my tastes, it sounds kind of like you're overthinking this shit and kind of rambly/nervous/over-try hard.

If this is what you actually write like, fine, just hit send, they have a better sense of you than I do. But if this is something you've back and forthed and edited 5+ times, just fucking delete it, send "Hey, what's up it's [anon]!" Chat a bit, then go ahead and ask her and her boyfriend on a couples date or some shit--which will automatically get you her number.

>>18035537
Eh. Its not like I've been pushing that entire year. I tried from April-June... Then spoke to her occasionally then tried again in December. (And she seemed to be serious then about doing something. But backed off again...)

If I invite a guy I've been talking to and had a date with to hang out with friends (and he was the one who said before he wants to hang out with mutual friends), and then he suddenly says there's a family thing he has to attend that day, is it safe to assume he's lying and just doesn't want to see me?

>>18035746
D?

>>18035754
Nope

Why? Similar situation?

>>18035762
Yes, and a family thing actually came up. But I can't speak for your guy. Try a second time, if he still doesn't show up, he is either not interested or unreliable.

>>18035773
Okay, thanks.

I have really bad trust issues, it's stupid.

>>18035779
Nah, it's a fair question, and a fair doubt, you would be stupid not to think he ditched.

I've had a few casual, short conversations with this really cute girl at my school, which is heavily male dominated, so I don't get the chance to meet many other girls. She's seriously my type, visually at least (she's short, has black bob cut, lots of eyeliner). I'd like to ask her out for a drink or something at some point but I don't even know her name. For anyone, what are some not as obvious conversation starters or questions I can ask to get to know her, and for girls, how long do you feel you have to know a guy before accepting an invitation for drinks or lunch or whatever by him?

>>18035746

My general outlook for shit like this:

Give the benefit of the doubt and assume they're telling the truth. If they are, shit happens, if they're not, then next time it happens another excuse will pop up anyway and no big because sometimes people just don't feel the same way.

All stressing and doubting does is make you crazy. It doesn't change things one way or the other.

The alternative is you assume he's lieing and just instantly drop him, but shit does happen in real life. There IS a point where you just see this shit happen too much and you should just stop wasting your time, but this is the first time and it's not like it's that much more effort to see what's up next time you want to hang out.

can someone explain why it's so hard getting a gf?

>>18035735
Alright, fair, but my question still stands, and it's very important (mainly for you to ask yourself). Why are you trying so hard for so long for a woman who is simply not interested? Like I said, if she was really interested she would have put forth SOME serious effort at least once in the span of a calendar year to do something with you. So you went to lunch with her once and she brought some guy along which should have been a massive clue that she did not view it as a date of any sort, probably because you didn't establish that you were asking her out on a date to begin with and probably also because she wouldn't have gone out with you on those terms anyway. That message is loud and clear.

>(And she seemed to be serious then about doing something. But backed off again...)
So she wasn't serious. Man, you shouldn't be doing this to yourself. You should find someone who actually wants to make time to date you. You're just heading nowhere with her.

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>>18035679

yeah, I've talked to her about my partner a fair amount. I wasn't worrying *too* much, it's just that I've never tried to get a girls number before online so I was pretty much hoping for some /adv/ proofreading.

desu I sent the message pretty much verbatim (changed one or two little words here and there) and got the following response:

>"Yay!! How is it having the laptop back! Ah me too, your an awesome guy [redacted]! That's strange I also have a mobile phone so crazy! Lol aww thank you [redacted] il give you a text after work so you can save my number! Thanks [redacted] you too! Yeah still on shift unfortunately! Haha I'm no better with fashion I go to work like a homeless person lol

god damn. That went better than I expected, got the fear as soon as I hit send for nothing.

>>18035798
Having something to offer or knowing someone. It's kind of like a job in a rough economy

>have to know someone that knows someone
>have to have something to offer like being fun
>maybe have to have a job
>not necessarily super attractive but at least take pretty decent care of yourself and present well

I apply the same tactics of job hunting as I do to dating. It works wonders and it helps deal with a few of the inevitable rejections.

>>18035796

>not obvious

Why? So you can linger in the later called friendzone?

"Hi, I'm Anon, wanna grab a drink or coffee?"

If yes, she's in. You ask her name and go for a talk.

>>18035799
I guess its most of the more subtle things that shes done that makes me think that theres a chance.

The staring, locking eyes, randomly appearing next to me, laughing at my stupid not funny, teasing jokes.

But, like I said, I am not constantly focusing on her. Though for obvious reasons I will stay in contact with her

>>18035810

not that I disagree with your mindset, but geeze.

I get the sense it wasn't always this hard. You;d have married the girl down the block and that was that.

>>18035827
Times have changed since those days. People have TV, movies, internet, cell phones, big cities etc. Being able to communicate with people everywhere with a specific set of wants and a huge lot of people to pick from has made dating a buyers market.

Online dating has pretty much ruined regular dating. I met all my ex's through work and friends but even that's getting tough and I'm considering moving to crap like Tindr now.

>>18035801
>it's just that I've never tried to get a girls number before online

As someone with a few female friends, you're over thinking shit. Girls are people, the same as guys. Hell in my mind, unless some weird shit is going on, most of the time I'm barely ever consciously aware of the fact that my best friend is a girl--and I've fucking slept with her (long story with strange circumstances and lots of alcohol).

The key to having friends of the opposite gender is just to focus less on the female aspect, focus more on the friend aspect, or else you're going to keep putting yourself in further needlessly awkward situations--exactly like this one.

Good luck on the friendship man. Take this one as a hint and realize, eh this shit isn't all that big a deal. People be people. If you get along, take it at face value and go with the flow.

girls: with tindr since its a fast moving thing, how quickly do you ask to go for a first meet/date? within the first week of talking or about 3 or 4 days in? i figure time is important since its a quick moving thing

>>18035819
That's all fine and stuff but she might do that with any other friend too. Staring, locking eyes, being bubbly is a good indicator that she's interested most of the time but it's not absolute, and in your case I think it's clear which one it is.

>But, like I said, I am not constantly focusing on her. Though for obvious reasons I will stay in contact with her
Cool, and while you're at it you should start focusing on other girls too. And get to a point where she's no longer in your rearview mirror.

>>18035876
From what I can tell, she only acts like this towards me.

She seems to act more "normal" towards her other friends.


But. yea, I am sorta leaving it open for other girls, if one comes along that I am interested in

Is 21 too young/creepy to try an online dating site?

>>18035854
Talk 2-3 days. But not non-stop all day. Just a little bit of conversation. Find out what they like to do. Save the details about where they're from/where they work etc. for in person. Ask them to do that activity they enjoy. Have a time and place in mind. Seems to work for me. If they flake, don't reach out to re-schedule. That's on them and you don't want to waste your time. Remember, you're just meeting up for some fun. Don't overthink it.

>>18035887
Of course not dude, most people on Tindr are in their early 20s. Being 30 on dating sites is sad and creepy though.

>>18035889
thanks, i figured i'd just go on a few times throughout the day and send a message or two casually.

what should the first message or two be? i hear statistically people make up their minds in the first two messages. i feel like "hey how are you?" "good, yourself?" and basics like that will be really boring for them.

>>18035893
I mean like eharmony or match, I just feel like one of those advertised paid services would have a more mature dating pool, but at the same time I can't tell if it's more "desperate" or weird

>>18034637
of course its insulting. does he talk to you about them?
you have somehow meet in the middle though if he really has a problem

>>18035897
It might be a little weird but I assume you're a guy, so you'll probably get a lot of older women so if you're cool with that, go for it.

>>18034637
If you're pretty lazy, that can be shitty. My gf is like a log since she says she gets tired from being on top or anything. I kind of understand but at the same time it's lead to some resentment.

>>18034637
>but my current boyfriend likes to compare me to his ex which I find irritating and kind of insulting.
>I'm pretty lazy when it comes to sex

It's stupid to be insulted when you admit you're not even trying.

Is it easy to get laid as an at least average looking guy? Seems like it should be whenever I acknowledge the world population.

Is it really just all in my head?

>>18035981
No it's not. Physical relationships are built on physical attraction, ergo if you are average looking then you have no bait for attracting casual sex partners.

Average looking dudes have to rely on their humor and charm to attract women and that usually leads to committed relationships rather than casual ones.

Girls and guys

I became with this girl on Interpals a few months ago. We really hit it off on Interpals, so we exchanged numbers and talk on Whatsapp daily. She really likes talking to me, as I do with her. I think I'm starting to actually really like her... problem is, she lives on the other side of the ocean.

What should I do

>girl messages me (a few months ago)
>she seems like she genuinely wants to talk to me
>last message from her seemed a little blunt (though i highly doubt it was meant to be)
>i read and ignore it because i wasnt sure where to go with the conversation

>fast forward to now
>i change my profile picture and start a conversation with her on the same day
>she likes it and replies hello
>ask how she is
>reads it a little bit later and doesnt reply, hasnt been active for a while afterwards so is probably asleep (its late gmt)

theres probably a reason she didnt reply right (and hopefully will do later)? i mean she liked my picture so im guessing she would actually want to talk to me

r-r-right?

.

>>18036139
>i mean she liked my picture so im guessing she would actually want to talk to me
>r-r-right?

Wrong.

>>18036139
Eh, just wait it out. Probably not much of a concern.

She would talk to you before without issue? then there was that one incident?

I've done worse and had girls still talk to me. I have outright accused my "crush" of lying to me about some stuff.

>>18036143
how does this work

>>18036146
yeah of course that is the only possible option, just sucks how im wide awake at night and this happens

Guys and girls
If a girl tells you that she misses sex, is she trying to imply something? Or am I reading too deeply into this?

>>18036153
she wants you to fuck her

>>18036155
Well then

hermaphrodites
how does it feel down there

>>18036163
fuck her

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Soooo, how hot do I have to be to get a guy to message me first on tinder because goddamn I must be the lowest on the totem pole to constantly have to practically beg them to talk to me.

>>18035887
It's only creepy when you're underage.
Like goddamn the amount of kids under 18 I've seen lying about their age on tinder is terrifying.
21 is actually perfect, because (assuming US fag) you're old enough to go to the bar and have a casual first meeting drink.

>>18036170
Bost pic?

>>18036169
ok

>>18035854
I go at it immediately because frankly I hate online/text based interaction. I'm too quick to sperg out when I don't have the body language to read, so I try to get offline ASAP.

I wouldn't even be online if it weren't for the fact that's the only way to fucking do it if you don't have friends in your new town yet.

>>18036150
Someone liking a picture you post on jewbook doesn't mean they want to talk to you. I don't see what's so strange about that.

>>18036170
Well the guy mindset for Tindr is if the girl doesn't message them first, she's not interested.

>>18036177
Also this might help.

>>18036181
why would you like a photo for an other purpose than you think they're attractive?

>>18036150
I say, just wait it out. See if she replies tomorrow and work from there

>>18036177
Not sure it's a good idea to post my face here lol
>>18036182
That's dumb, since guys do that thing where they just swipe yes on every single girl, regardless if they even find them attractive at all, and then just weed through the matches.
How the hell am I supposed to know if I'm the 1/10 you just spammed yes on or someone you actually wanted to talk to?
I wouldn't have swiped yes to a dude I didn't want to talk to, girls don't have to pull that strategy.
Regardless, I'm ok with doing it, I just hate always having to do it. Just for once I'd love to see a dude take that initiative that I'm incredibly attracted to.

>>18036182
thats not true, as a guy i feel expected to start all conversations

if a girl is nice, asks questions and seems like she actually wants to talk then that is makes me feel like they are interested

>>18036185
Some people just like everything that's posted to it

>>18036195
have you ever used facebook

>>18036190
>I wouldn't have swiped yes to a dude I didn't want to talk to, girls don't have to pull that strategy.

Yet they do. Girls match guys and then don't respond to messages at all. Best bet for us dudes is to assume a girl isn't interested in talking even if she matches until proven otherwise.

>>18036185
Jesus. People like shit on fb all the time they don't actually care about. A like is the minimum amount of effort you can give in response to something that has been posted. Maybe she thought the picture was funny or that it was a good photo of you. Just because she reacted doesn't mean she wants to talk.

Are you the dude whose friend wants him to be an EMT and are sperging out overanalysing it?

>>18036200
Yes. Why wouldn't I have?

And some people really just like everything thats posted. Just like some like every comment on their wall

>>18036190
>Not sure it's a good idea to post my face here lol
This is /adv/ so it's fine really.

Well I guess the thought is that after the swipe and you matching, it pretty much leaves the ball in your court and it's down to you to make the first move. But being that you said you swiped on them, then I don't know, that's a little strange. How do the conversations usually go then?

>>18036204
>Are you the dude whose friend wants him to be an EMT and are sperging out overanalysing it?

I'm that overthinker, and oddly enough, I'm not the one who asked about the FB stuff. (I don't have EMT girl on FB anyway)

I'm actually the other guy answering, telling him to just see what tomorrow holds

>>18036204
Girls don't have to swipe EVERY dude and weed through the matches though, because we're the one's selecting hypothetically.
If they don't respond to you, it's more likely because they've already started talking to someone else possibly better. Regardless, just the mere act of swiping yes means she was interested in you to some degree.
>>18036210
Well my favorites are the guys who put nothing in their profile (sarcasm). Literally nothing I can go off of other than the awkward small talk that is meaningless and then shockingly goes no where. When I have something I can comment on, I do that. Sometimes they stick around and chat, most just ghost immediately. None ever attempt to break out of the digital realm though, which I don't really understand but whatever.

I get that after matching, it's basically a 50/50 responsibility to contact one another. It's just as much my responsibility to contact first as it is his, but I just find myself having to be the one to do it all the damn time.

I just genuinely don't know which it is, men are just more cowardly these days and don't take any minor risks, or if it's just I'm experiencing the same thing I described above about men having better options to talk to and I get thrown on the back burner. I'm more inclined to believe the latter, since it seems more likely. It's the beauty and struggle of online dating, it fosters this extreme competition to be the absolute best of the best, because cycling through profiles takes seconds and there's no need to ever settle with the ocean of options in front of you.

>>18036205
>>18036204
rule 1 of being 18 on facebook

if you someone posts an attractive photo or a nice photo and you also like that person/want to get to know them, you just like it

its such a small gesture but it does mean something

>>18036224
In general, I agree. BUt there are those who like everything in existance

>>18036222
I think it's mostly because everyone both male and female assume Tindr is just a giant selection of people that they can pick and choose from easily and just leave everything to the other person since they assume there will always be more. It's shitty but with Tindr you have to make extra effort to have anything happen since there will be a lot of others talking to whoever you're talking to.

>>18036222
>Regardless, just the mere act of swiping yes means she was interested in you to some degree.
Oh yeah I agree and I'm aware that the non-responses are probably due to being outdone by a better looking guy, I'm just saying that we, or at least I, go in not really expecting a response. Which I suppose is where the shocking tinder pick up line culture has come from. Any response is better than none at all.

>>18036224
Sure but I like pictures of girls I know who are good looking but I have no intention of attempting to escalate our friendship. They're attractive, it's a good picture, I don't then start up a conversation with them. You might as well just wait and see if she responds because we could go back and forth on whether or not liking a pictures "means" anything until the cows come home.

Girls: All this tindr talk got me thinking. What do I put in a bio? I know interests is important but what else?

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>>18036247
Ugh, idk why I even do this shit.
Oh wait, it's because I don't have any friends to introduce me to people and my options are pretty slim.

>>18036262
I know, I'm in the same boat and it's shitty but it's how it goes. Really just be yourself and have some good pics, that will open things up and at least help you see some people in person. Tindr is just something to introduce yourself with, after that you can see the person face to face and exchange phone numbers and such.

What kind of pictures do you use?

Girls and guys, what do I do?

>only know girl from high school just by name and face
>she doesnt know me at all, probably just face
>add her on snapchat
> have no clue how to instigate something where we start talking

Any advice from you guys how to start? And is it weird just to add them and send them stuff occasionally?

>>18036271
Just my good pics from fb. Selfies mostly.
I included in my bio what I'm looking for and what I'm like, along with some interests.

>>18036272
If you've never talked to her, howd you get her sc? Because it is a little weird to have someone add me on SC if I've never given them my username personally.

It's like someone randomly texting me even though I never gave them my number.

>>18036272
It depends on how you got their snapchat in the first place. You could be super casual to begin with and be like "oh wait, i think i recognize you. "old school" right?"

>>18036277
Selfies are good but maybe one with a friend (female though, guys are put off by women with pics with guys in their profile).

Do you mind posting whats exactly written in your profile?

>>18036256
Not a girl but humor is a good hook. Also my most successful bio ever had something like "I'm emotionally unavailable" and I got a dozen girls in two weeks messaged me referencing that line specifically with shit like "emotionally unavailable? just my type"

Also I'm not handsome. Like a weak 7 on a good day with the right lighting. I am pretty funny though.

>>18036285
I've got a couple with friends, I just like, know I would be very upset if I found out my friend was posting my face on their dating profile. Shit weirds me out, therefore I don't like doing it to my friends either. Only ones I've got is me and a close friend who said she was cool with me using it.
>No dudes
Lol yeah no shit. Idk why there are so many guys on tinder using pics with these like, 11/10
s kissing them and shit. I'm like "uh, I'm not even going to bother competing with that. Next."
The 4 common pics I negate immediately are
>Pic with hot chick
>Group pic as main
>Dead animal in pic (hunters. Live in a redneck area, but I'm not exactly getting turned on by the bloody deer carcass you're holding guys.)
>Pic with young child. (Will assume it's your kid no matter what, nope out immediately.)

>>18036291
>"I'm emotionally unavailable"
I'm not too sure on that one. Any other funny examples? Just a short ice breaker should do then I figure I'd just dump my interests below it.

>>18036298
The context was humourous. The whole bio was exaggeratedly self-deprecating and the punchline was about how I'd buy them chicken nuggets and text back immediately.

I don't know that your interests are that important on Tinder. If you're playing for an actual relationship then maybe but I've always found the shock and awe tactic better for getting a foot in the door.

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>my other friend saw me walking with you the other day and asked if you were my gf
>I was stuck between gagging and laughing for 5 minutes
>it'd be like dating a relative, you know?
>the thought was just mildly repulsive

How can someone say this? I'm floored
>mfw we've had sex and dated
>signed a lease with him and another friend today

>>18036222
>I just genuinely don't know which it is, men are just more cowardly these days and don't take any minor risks
It's not that they're afraid of taking minor risks, it's that their effort will likely give better dividends elsewhere. Women always wax on about how they want these specialized messages and all that good shit, but the man will have better results if he just throws as wide a net as possible. It's why so many men just message "hey" or some one liner at most.

>>18036336
I don't know what the shit you just said.

>>18036341
This is a string of texts I received today from a male friend

>Male
>5'8" or 5'9"
>Somewhere around 141-143lbs
>18
>a little bit of acne but nothing serious
Thoughts?

>>18036344
Reply back with "You do remember we dated and had sex right?"

>>18036345
>5'8"
>143lbs
Jesus go eat a sandwich

>>18036345
>5'8" or 5'9"

Sorry to hear that. You might get taller, some guys keep growing until about 21.

>>18036345
A little on the thin side. Thats about it. Height wise, you are fine

>>18036337
I'd be fine with just a "hey" man.
I just want someone to express the interest in me enough to actually want me to talk to them for once, instead of always having to grovel at them to get any response what so ever.

It's probably just a string of bad luck, statistically speaking I've just GOT to run into a dude who will bother to contact me before I am forced to contact him, but shit man. Dating is already a numbers game.

>>18036347
I just don't understand how he could say something so cruel to me, and I'm afraid that if I come back with some accusatory retort that he'll say I need to lighten up, I'm too easily-offended, etc and generally make living together hell

>>18036366
It sounds like he's been an asshole about it though. Honestly it's the best reply, it'll shut his insult down (and what he said is pretty insulting).

>>18036366
As a dude I'd say that was pretty offensive and if it were me sending it I'd be fully aware that it could be taken as offensive.

>>18036360
Dating is a buyers market now.

>>18036360
>I just want someone to express the interest in me enough to actually want me to talk to them for once, instead of always having to grovel at them to get any response what so ever.
You've had a glimpse of what online dating is like as a man. If you want to be able to put your foot in the door due to an awesome personality, go for real life dating. Online dating is has looks as the primary factor, and anyone who says otherwise is trying to sell you something.

Example- http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=165905221

>>18036378
I know, I've just tried everything else. Live in a small town. Tried talking to class mates/joining clubs, didn't go anywhere. Tried getting friends to hook me up, only lead to casual sex. Tried going to bars and talking to strangers, same as before.
Feel like online dating is the only place I haven't looked.

My bf has lost interest in me sexually. What do I do?

>>18036373
Then why ain't nobody buying me? Lol. If you're simultaneously selling yourself, and buying others, surely that means even if I'm bidding on someone else, someone should be bidding on me too.

>>18036387
Serious question is how good looking are you? How good is your personality? Are you interesting? Hobbies? Work? Grooming?

If you're not particularly attractive online dating will be very hit and miss and you'll need the other factors to bump up your attractiveness level.

>>18036390
Should be a bit careful with taking that attitude.

Not trying to tar all women with the same brush but I made a new friend recently and without even being experienced with dating she very definitely has this idea that the world owes her a good looking/successful/interesting boyfriend and it's not a good look on a girl.

>>18036387
I'm an engineering major (read-no women) that has to drive an hour each way to get to college that lives in a town of 18k. I'm fairly well acquainted with your issues. If you're going to insist on online dating, at least try out something like okcupid instead of Tinder which was explicitly made for casual sex.

>>18036395
Idk, I'd say I'm above a 5. I've been rated as high as 8 on soc, but my average is more in the 6-7 range. Personality is so subjective I don't know how to rate it. I'm not a bitch, I'm pretty chill. I don't anger easily, I don't fuck around with games, I've got the normal level of insecurity anyone else has. I'm in school and doing well, graduating soon. I shower every day, make an effort to dress well, not just sweats or anything, I pay attention to fashion trends to an extent but still maintain my own individual style. I do my hair and make up every day as well.
Hobbies I'll admit I'm a tad lacking in, most of them are solitary type things, like sewing, drawing, watching tv/movies, but I'm also open to trying anything.

Idk what kind of "rating" or whatever that would amount to on average.
>>18036399
I don't think the world owes me anything, I'm actually quite prepared with the reality I'll likely die alone at this rate, but I'm just thinking purely in figures of numbers. Statistically speaking, with the billions of people on this planet, if I try hard enough and expose myself enough, there should be at least ONE dude out there who will want to contact me first.
>>18036404
I did do okc before, but uh, all I got were men in their 50's-70's contacting me for some barely legal ass or something. Shit was super weird. Seems like in my area, okc is reserved for the old folk, because there were not many profiles at all under 30.

>>18036424
>Shit was super weird. Seems like in my area, okc is reserved for the old folk, because there were not many profiles at all under 30.
Pretty sure you can restrict it by age.

>>18036424
>I'd say I'm above a 5. I've been rated as high as 8 on soc, but my average is more in the 6-7 range.
Post a pic? That's a pretty large range gap.

What kind of things do you usually talk about with guys? Hobbies are a good way of keeping a guy around if you share the same interest.

>>18036429
I did lol.
Like it got to a point that I even had to put in big bold letters on my page "DO NOT CONTACT ME IF YOU'RE OLDER THAN 25."
70 year old grandpa messages me "I know you wrote that, but I hope maybe I can be the exception?"
>Rage quit.

>>18036435
brb, downloading okc to see if a milf messages me

>>18036437
isn't okc just for dating, not casual stuff?

>>18036439
no clue but I am okay with dating an older woman

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>>18036434
If this will suffice.
My go to is tv shows, since it's usually an easy thing to talk about if I know nothing about a person.
I watch some of the mainstream stuff, TWD, Supernatural, Archer, South Park, etc. So usually I can get a nibble on one of those.
I don't usually talk about one thing in specific though, I go wherever the conversation takes me, if it takes me anywhere at all.

Can you abide having a soulmate and also a different sexual partner?

>>18036445
I haven't been paying attention to any part of this reply thread.
Fair body, bird.
Hair's nice

>>18036451
Yeah, like I'll never claim to be a 10/10 or anything, but I'm confident enough that I'm also not a 1 or anything. I'd say I'm relatively average at worst. I know how to dress to suit my shape too.

>>18036445
Face is usually what sells it on tindr ultimately so still hard to say.

What about other activities? Something active would be perfect, whether it's as simple as hiking, swimming or maybe playing a musical instrument. TV shows are a little difficult to do with someone mutually.

>>18036445
hit the gym, chubby.

>>18036460
Yeah
Work on your TV taste though
It's pretty entry level shit

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>>18036439
In theory yes, but Tinder was made for casual sex. People started using it to date, and I don't see why the inverse couldn't happen. I definitely know a lot of people use it to find a unicorn for threesomes.

>>18036446
Nah. Would rather be single than dance around that bullshit.

>>18036445
>I watch some of the mainstream stuff, TWD, Supernatural
I call upon your true name, TUMBLR!

>>18036461
Yeah I know, idk if I wanna post face tho. Especially since I knew posting anything with what I've posted invites the trolls.>>18036464

As I've said, social hobbies are my weak point. I like some video games, but I've yet to really find a multiplayer game I really enjoy outside like minecraft, which kek is full of 12 year olds mostly. I'm into more cooperative type games than like, team vs team type games, which is where I struggle to find mainstream multiplayer games I can enjoy.
I like crafting and building shit. I've built some small things with my dad before, like benches and shelving. I upcycle a lot too, but that's kind of a chick hobby.
>>18036473
Well, I just listed the stuff that would have the widest pool of people into it as well, that was kind of the point.
Though the rest of my shit is cartoons and indie film/animation on youtube and such.
One of my flaws is being into anime I guess. It's hard to convince people you like anime without being a raging body pillow fucking weeaboo, so I typically keep that to myself until I can properly gauge their reaction.
>>18036475
See above as well. Supernatural I get, wasn't aware Tumblr was that huge on twd though. Figured it was too violent for their triggers.

>>18036490
/adv/ is a nicer for pics and such, if it were /soc/ you'd be in for some shit though. /adv/ is the only board I've ever posted a pic to.

Video games is a decent avenue to explore. Maybe check out stuff like Fallout 4 or some older classics like N64? A lot of guys like video games and would love a girl to play them with.

Building stuff is also cool. Have you considered cars at all? Not building one obviously but taking an interest in them at least.

>>18036490
>Well, I just listed the stuff that would have the widest pool of people into it as well, that was kind of the point.
>Though the rest of my shit is cartoons and indie film/animation on youtube and such.
>One of my flaws is being into anime I guess. It's hard to convince people you like anime without being a raging body pillow fucking weeaboo, so I typically keep that to myself until I can properly gauge their reaction.
Yeah fuck anime
I've had a lotta weeb friends. Never they have convinced me to tolerate it

/co/fag?

Look, don't get it into your head that I'm trying to concern troll whiteknight this shit.
I'm just drunk and looking for conversation.

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>>18034562
I think I am fucked for life, I guess.

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>>18036490
The lack of social hobbies wouldn't bother me. I just want to know that a girl has enough of a personality to be into /something/. Like, I've met women who base their entire identities around being girly and attracting men that they literally don't have hobbies. "So what else do you like to do?" "Oh, I like Game of Thrones and french bulldogs" those things aren't hobbies.

Maybe try adding something funny to your tinder bio like "I send tit pics" and when they ask send them pic related.

>>18035525
Would like to hear an advice for this as well. In exactly the same situation.

>>18035525
Soooo subjective to the individual girl too. If you asked her to do a certain thing at a certain time and she was legitimately busy, as in already had plans or was working or something, then it's not a rejection. If it was more like an open ended invitation to see a movie during the week and she claimed to be busy the whole week then it's a rejection.

>>18036446
I wouldn't want that

>>18036501
Yeah, but I find the population of r9k tends to spill over here quite a lot, which it doesn't matter what you look like, if you're one of those damn dirty whores who won't fuck them they'll just call you fat and cry about it.

I love old school n64 mario party, friends and I get drunk and play it whenever we're all back in our home town at the same time.
I can't really afford the consoles anymore, newest system I have is a ps3, and I'm talking the original ps3 when it first came out. I've got steam, but a low powered lap top. I suppose the hardest part about video games as a hobby is it's incredibly expensive. Thats why I tend to play a lot of indie games.

Not too huge on cars, never really understood the appeal. A car's a car to me really lol. Only car that I've ever thought "Thats a cool car, I want it!" was a mini cooper lol. (I'm a chick after all.) Otherwise a car's just a means of transport to me.
>>18036503
Yeah I lurk co. Though I'm not into capes lol. I read a lot of webcomics though, but the cartoons I'm into are controversial on co kek.
I know it's heavily sjw pandering but fuck it I like Steven Universe, I think it's cute. I liked Gravity Falls and Star vs.
And of course I like visiting co for all my nostalgia needs.
>>18036516
Lol I do not think I'd get the desired results with that line. Probably just get the dudes looking for a ons.

>>18036531
I don't think Steven Universe is particularly SJW pandering
I mean, yes, the gems are all females and they often have romantic affiliations, but that doesn't mean it's SJW
The idea of female aliens is a false one.
They're alien.
They have no sex like we do.
Garnet isn't too lesbians in a trenchcoat. It's two aliens fused together into a third being.

Also, Gravity Falls was good until the end fucked up and Star Vs is still good. Especially the most recent episode, which ended in a bold way

>>18036531
Maybe go the N64 route? I don't mean by one but talk to guys about video games and the old classics and how you used to hang out with friends and play Mario Party. A guy would love to hang out and do things like that.

Don't pour money into games though, I like them as much as anyone else but I rarely buy any. I haven't got a brand new game in over a year.

>>18036536
>I don't think Steven Universe is particularly SJW pandering
Up until recently the show was literally storyboarded by a SJW pushing tranny love and lesbian relationships
Saying "They're aliens and it's not sex! It's fusing!" doesn't mean it isn't a very blatant metaphor for fucking

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Alright niggers, got a question for you all

What would you do if you went through your SO's laptop and found a lengthy, detailed story about you hooking up with and fucking your sibling of the same gender?

>>18036536
Eh yeah, but you can still very painfully see the tumblr undertones. Regardless I still like it. I can look past those "progressive" undertones to the core of the show, and I agree. It's a show about badass rock ladies and half rock boy saving the earth.

>>18036539
Yeah, that's something I can bring up. If I get one to message me to begin with lol.

>>18036541
Yeah, fusing was obviously sex, but it wasn't like "Sex should only be between trans people" like SJW want to advocate

Shit with Pearl made it clear that fusing was more about intimacy and not about sex.
Like when Pearl "raped" Garnet.
It wasn't about "Oh jeez I want your body", it was "I want to be close to someone"

>>18036546
Worried and doubt, with a small part of my mind understanding that it's probably fiction

But still worry

>>18036548
>Like when Pearl "raped" Garnet.
Which episode was that kek

>>18036546
I'd probably vomit and immediately break up with them. No joke either, I'd be disgusted and enraged.

I have this girl who is in two of my class and my chem lab that really stands out to me however I've never spoken to her before. Would it be weird if I just went up to her one day like after class and tried to talk to her, maybe get her number? Like would most girls find that weird?

>>18036547
You'll get to talk to one again. Also talk about their interests a bit too if they seem at least slightly interesting to you. Having mutual hobbies and interests is what will help you break free of the casual sex problems you've been having since you'll be someone they want to hang out with and do other stuff with.

>>18036550
I forget.
It's the one when they were worried about an old Homeworld transmitter tower.
Pearl and Garnet had to fuse to destroy it
So Pearl get rebuilding it so they had to keep fusing

The first episode with the best fusion. I forget her name. 4 armed magician lady.

>>18036557
Talk to her, no. You're classmates, it's normal to talk to classmates. I'd build up to dropping digits though. Talk to her a couple times first.

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Girls:

Too weird to try and reconnect with someone you have only said a few dozen words to in about 3 years? There is about a 0.005% chance I will ever run into her in person and we have no mutual friends to buffer for me. She likes me well enough and is extremely shy.

Not a sperglord so I'm confident I can make conversation as long as she gives me a little bit to work with.

>>18036558
Yeah, just been single a loooonng ass time and have been actively looking the whole way through. In the many years I've been doing it, the amount of guys I've had interest in and have also had some interest in me have totaled 3. All 3 just wanting something casual, and 1 just wanted a ons. Idk how everyone else does it, if they've just got no standards or I've got too high of standards, or what.

>>18036560
Oh yeah that one. I think it was Sardonyx? The magician one?

>>18036575
That's her name
Best Gem

>>18036570
It's hard to say. You did say you're in a small town I think and that can be a problem from what I hear sometimes. Online is still probably your best chance but like I said, connecting with someone really well over even just one hobby can make all the difference.

My gf and I ended up together since we both loved the same music and bonded over that. In all honesty it probably would've been a casual thing if it weren't for that.

An ex of mine (only lasted a month, no intimacy just incompatible) compared herself to a used up ketchup bottle and I didn't understand what she meant

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ketchup%20bottle

I found this but I still don't understand. What does it mean when a girl compares herself to a used up ketchup bottle. Seems like an odd comparison

>>18036598
She's saying she's worthless and nobody will ever love her because she's all used up.

>>18036602
Used up how? Like her body? Christ, now I'm glad I didn't continue with her

>>18036608
Who knows. She could mean emotionally as well. As in shes exhausted waiting, searching, hoping that one day someone will come for her and want her.

Or could mean physically. Who knows. Either way, sounds like she's in a bad place, and if you consider her a friend at all I'd pay her some kind words.
But not too kind, or she'll attach to you.

>>18036598
she meant that she likes when she gets smacked hard in the ass.

>>18036445
You are a cum tamer.

>>18036389
get in shape?

>>18036624
Thank... you?

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>>18036630

>>18036633
honestly can't tell if I'm being mocked or not lol.
4chan is getting too deep on me.

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>>18036637
the duck represents approval. You look fine girl.

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>>18036644
Then a genuine thank you lol.

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>>18036608
>Used up how? Like her body?
>This action produces a slapping sound that is meant to imitate the sound produced by the contact of flesh between two people committing vigorous sexual intercourse or similar act.

Sounds like it to me.

>>18036570
you sound like the female version of me

nothing serious since 2008, no sex, no ons shit or fwb, just single, surrounded by ppl at shows, and feel little to nothing for anyone.. i just can't much of an attraction to very many people..and finally when I feel that spark, they're usually taken or too young to date or not interested. 31 years old now, years fly by.

>>18036279
>>18036280
It was through twitter. Was scrolling through it and I clicked her name and saw it in her bio. I was like fuck it. Added her and bang

>>18036628
I work out quite a bit.

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>Mfw I literally have a girl I was (well, alright i'm still kind of) really into, shitting up my phone, begging me to do her homework for her

>Mfw she's probably only asking in order to fuck some douche bag on Valentines day so by refusing her i'm basically dooming her to her stupidity

>Mfw I say I want to do it together and she makes up a ton of bullshit about how her BROTHER who she MOVED IN WITH VOLUNTARILY won't let her leave the house with a guy(She's fucking 20) then just settles on "do it for me"

>>18036928
Oh right and in all that smug joy I forgot to ask:
Ladies how do I stomp this bullshit out like a fire

>>18036928
>>18036935
Just say no.