Thread replies: 10
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2
Anonymous
borderline personality disorder 2017-02-08 06:26:54 Post No. 18032323
[Report] Image search: [Google]
borderline personality disorder 2017-02-08 06:26:54 Post No. 18032323
[Report] Image search: [Google]
File: 1472956819188.jpg (37KB, 696x570px) Image search:
[Google]
37KB, 696x570px
I can't remember whenever it started, but this same cycle of events have been happening for a very long time now. I'm 19 years old.
I've made a habit of socially isolating myself at any opportunity, when I was in secondary school and summer came I would begin to feel that my friend's don't like me and would usually cut contact with them each summer and isolate myself in my room. I also experienced frequent bouts of depression and mood swings, beginning at sometime around 13 years old and continuing on until now. At 15 I began a relationship with a person very special to me, and for the entirety of that 1 year relationship I essentially got angry at her over every minor reason; if she said something wrong I'd freak out and cut contact with her, then experience extreme loneliness and depression until I came in contact with her again (which was usually me apologizing and readding, in which she forgave.) this cycle persisted for a year until I finally realized, at 16 years old that I'm far too "autistic" for any form of relationship so I cut it off.
Since then I've pretty much been socially isolated for the most part and I experience mood swings usually whenever I chat with people online but it can be over any given random thing: for example, I came home and my aunt asked if I wanted dinner and I couldn't speak, in my head all I could think was "go away, go away, go away" and went upstairs and punched my thigh violently out of anger. I wasn't really capable of thinking of anything else during that moment but it's just to illustrate how random, nonsensical things cause terribly violent and annoying mood swings.
I often have terribly impulsive behaviour and say and do what I think, regardless of the consequences. I can't give a notable example off the top of my head but for the entirety of 2ndary education I pretty much acted like a complete retard and said horribly offensive shit to people and immediately regretted.
>>
Another example of impulsive behaviour is my incredibly retarded spending of £571 on a stranger because I felt bad for him.
My most prominent problems are problems of psychosis, low self worth and suicidal thoughts. They are extremely common whenever I think about things that trouble me: for example, my parents recently divorced and I had immediate suicidal thoughts following it. I've planned suicide a few times but didn't carry it out (obviously!), and since then the feeling has more or less been following me and influencing my mood and behaviour causing me to care less about academics and life in general which is followed by bouts of depression. I also have some violent temper tantrums but they usually only last for a short period of time and are usually right after I get annoyed over something stupid. It's got to the point where if I die in CSGO I end up nearly punching myself in the face; not out of frustration at the game but out of random shit. I was talking to my friend Jim yesterday and he didn't reply for around 8 minutes, which is obviously nothing to be alarmed about but my emotions are so impressionable I immediately jumped to the conclusion that he hates me and bust my lip open biting it.
should i seek help
>tfw super autistic
>>
>>18032334
Yes, seek help. Wanting to fix your problem is part of the process, I hope things work out.
>>
>>18032323
You're not borderline. BPD is the new meme disorder.
>social retard
>then AvPD
>then aspergers
>then schizoid
Now it is BPD. Stop following the meme train to make excuses for why you're a fuck up
>>
>>18032341
well yeah im a fuck up but i also have mood swings every day that i cant control so thats one thing
>>
>>18032323
Only a psych can answer you this with a proper diagnosis, I only can tell you some things I do/did so you can compare:
>self harm in form of cutting with a knife
>excessive use of alcohol and antipain pills
>manipulating others while being aware of that
>ghosting friends of many years
>acting sick for attention/selfishness
>mood swings very often
>threatening suicide with and without wanting to do it
>hurting others out of mood
>boredom almost anytime
...
>>
>>18032387
I've done everything except for the excessive alcohol and antipain pills. I'd prefer to forget about the rest, honestly.
>>
Grow the fuck up.
>>
>>18032375
That's not all there is to BPD. Learn something.
You're probably still going through the throes of being a teenager. I didn't even start puberty til I was 16. It was a rough few years.
>>
File: 1482726791673.jpg (4KB, 140x140px) Image search:
[Google]
4KB, 140x140px
Doubt you're borderline, unless you've been diagnosed. People with borderline disorder are emotional aliens that shouldn't be allowed to exist in normal society, because they literally cause emotional chaos to everyone around them everywhere they go.
BPD is actually fairly rare, not as common as other personality disorders.
Thread posts: 10
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2