Someone I love has been raped and is now rationalizing it.

>>18001480
Are you in a relationship of some sort? What's the story, I need to know more

Two possibilities

1. It was actually consensual sex
or
2. She's trying to downplay it to protect herself, this is a common way of thinking after trauma happens. "Mom isn't really dead, this is a nightmare" "I wasn't actually raped since I know him personally and rape only happens from strangers"

#2 is beyond your pay grade, she needs to see a psychiatrist (and file a police report!)

>>18001480
>This dumbfounded me because it felt like I was violated in the process of knowing she was raped but now I don't know how to respond to how she feels and this also hurts.

>What should I do?

This isn't about YOU. It's her process. Be there for whatever she asks of you, but don't tell her how to deal with it. You are not her psychologist.

>>18001488
No you don't.

>>18001480
It's fine to feel this way. If the anxiety is as sincere as you make it seem, then you should get in touch with a doctor who could help you deal with it. If anxiety such as this goes far, it could end up complicating your life and sending you right down depression-road. Just tell the doc you're worried and you don't know how to deal with the problem, and that you're afraid. Don't come here with that kind of thing again, only assholes on here it seems like.

>>18001480
>friend has tramatic experience
>friend is able to actually cope
>friend doesn't break down and become a worthless shell of a human being
>"hey guys, what's wrong with my friend?"

>>18001504
"coping" doesn't mean "not file a police report and pretend it never happened and stay in contact with a criminal"

>>18001519

You are right. But it's still her life. She has to choose to change it, you can't make that choice for her.

>>18001480
Was it a refugee?

N-no i d-deserve it for not being progressive enough. hahha get rekt

Yes, she is my girlfriend but I felt reluctant to add that detail. She knew him and said he just went to get some water when he pushed a table up against the door to the room and then she didn't say much more. She sent me pictures of her bruises, but yes, I almost feel it's like a Stockholm syndrome to her

>>18001480
spoiler alert: she was not raped and is claiming otherwise so that you will continue to provide her with attention despite her fucking someone that is not you

>>18001519
no, that is coping. just not the way you want it.

there is not a lot that you can do besides be there for her, listen and encourage her to see a therapist. went through a similar thing before.

>>18001530
if you're really OP, you are such a retarded cuck it's hilarious.

or this is bait.

either way, gtfo

>>18001501
Give me a fucking break. You're not my psychologist either so think of things from my perspective. I'm not even asking about how to help, just how to respond to what she said. Stop being an SJW

>>18001530
LOL WHAT A KEK

She fucked behind your back too roughly and had to claim rape. Top kek. Let me guess she didnt report it?

How convenient.

>>18001540
do you hear yourself?

you want advice on how to respond.

you get told to go with the flow and listen to what she needs.

so you call the advice giver a SJW for telling you to deal with it on the victims terms.

if this isn't bait, then you're just retarded.

>>18001540
Tell her he committed a crime, he could've given her an STD or made her pregnant

You need to pop the bubble of her delusion here

She needs to report this and get counseling

>>18001540
>there is not a lot that you can do besides be there for her, listen and encourage her to see a therapist. went through a similar thing before.

If you don't like my way of putting it, read what this Anon wrote. It's the same thing.

You can go to a shrink for how you feel, but you can't change how she feels.

>>18001519
I agree.

>>18001550
>>18001555
>let a traumatized person's rapist get away or you're insensitive

She's not thinking normally, she's just been assaulted. This isn't a lifestyle choice OP needs to accept
Fuck off you morons

>>18001554
She wont report it because she was never raped..OP is a real life cuckold

>>18001500
I feel she is downplaying it. What should I do then? Should I take a hard truth approach (say it as it is) or help her come to that conclusion that she's downplaying it?

>>18001562
did I say not to report it?

white knight fag.

I'm saying that if you pressure her or make her move too fast, you'll just cause more trama.

but sure, fuck her and call the cops so I can get my white knight points!

retarded fag

I just need an answer to my last point. I think there lies the key. Thanks to all that have given advice already. I've read all the responses so far.

I fucked a girl once and her boyfrie d found out the bruises so she called it rape.

She never pressed charges but she lied about me. Don't trust her unless she presses charges

>>18001562

What's more important: Catching the rapist or helping her recover from this?

Unless OP is the cop working the case, I'm pretty sure he'd rather have a healthy girlfriend, don't you think?

Also, we are not saying he shouldn't encourage her to make a report. But he can't MAKE her do it. He has to walk this path with her and see if she chooses to do it. If she doesn't, well, he has to suck it up. She was the victim, not him.

>>18001569
Rape is a time-sensitive issue. She needs to be examined by a doctor for vaginal tearing (evidence), take Plan B if he came inside her, and get STD testing.

OP needs to direct the conversation because right now his gf is going down a delusion spiral to protect herself from the trauma.

She may have cucked you OP, maybe she wanted to try more cock and that's why she's not pressing charges

>>18001480
Dude you're a fucking dumbass. She had rough sex and is fucking with your head deal with it.

Just an fyi women have reported having orgasms from being raped whom have NEVER ORGASMED WITH THEIR HUSBANDS/PARTNERS.

She's either challenging you to choke fuck her or she's trying to rile your inner beta for lulz. Either way you're a dummy dummy fuccboi for posting this. Go play WoW or something.

>>18001581

I repeat my point earlier:

>What's more important: Catching the rapist or helping her recover from this?

>>18001578
She won't be healthy when her rapist's chlamydia destroys her uterus (which her rapist's child is also growing in) while she tries to convince OP that she's okay

You're retarded if you think a random stranger forcing himself upon a woman, is just like if a woman had consensual sex with a clean partner and a condom

>>18001589
What's more important is giving her a good chokefucking, hair pulling, slap on the ass and some old fashioned facefucking.

women respond the best to being dominated. OP is being challenged to out-dominate the man who dominated her before

Still reading all the responses but can't reply to all yet. Yes if I had to choose between catching the rapist and helping her recover I would say help her recover. It's just hurtful to see she is downplaying it and I don't know how to respond to that. And no, she isn't faking this. It's extremely evident that she is under stress in our conversations and in public

>>18001590
>You're retarded if you think a random stranger forcing himself upon a woman, is just like if a woman had consensual sex with a clean partner and a condom

Good thing I don't. And I'm not ignoring the health the risks. But if you have ever dealt with trauma, you know you can't let it become about yourself instead of the victim.

OP is more worried about how he feels. He needs to step back BEFORE trying to help her. Once he gets that, he can't help her get medical help. But right now he is too self absorbed for that.

>>18001599
>I would say help her recover.

Help her recover by dicking her you fucking idiot

>>18001590
>You're retarded if you think a random stranger forcing himself upon a woman, is just like if a woman had consensual sex with a clean partner and a condom


The former is what women crave and get off to, the latter is a beta's fantasy.


Fuck off. Women were literally designed to be taken and dominated by men it's a natural healthy state for them.

>>18001599
You should chat with a trained specialist OP, they can help you figure out how to respond to your gf and what help to seek if she decides to

A bunch of 4chan idiots are not the best source

https://www.rainn.org/about-national-sexual-assault-online-hotline

>>18001612

Trolls are getting lazier and lazier.

>>18001612
yes, porn featuring contracting gonorrhea is so hot mmmmmm yes Chad give me those herpes and rip my vaginal walls so i can't sit down anymore

>>18001617
Stick your head in the sand all you want. Dominant men will keep getting laid and emotional tampons like OP will be told """"rape"""" stories.

>>18001621
http://www.popsci.com/science/article/2013-05/science-arousal-during-rape