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First let me say thank you for taking time out of your day to read this, it means a lot to me. <3
I've recently been diagnosed with bipolar disorder at the age of 28. This has turned my world upside down but, at the same time, has explained a lot of my behavior, especially towards my social situation. See, I'm fortunate enough that I have friends who love and care about me. But sadly, my ups and downs have left them hurt and confused. My mood changes have caused me to acquire a fear of planning hangouts in advance. This is because I have no idea if I'll be in a depressive episode by the time the hangout arrives, and when I'm in a depressive episode I become so antisocial that I almost panic if people try to talk to me or pull me out of the house. Not to be one to brag, but when I'm manic I'm very charismatic and social. I can speak to anyone and everyone, I can make strangers laugh, I can hug my enemies, I can get phone numbers from women. But, don't get jealous. Its only when I'm manic. I'd gladly give that faulty charisma away to have 100% consistency in my character. See, it eventually goes away. And suddenly this charming person who's the center of the party, fades away. Instead, he is replaced by someone with no self esteem, who feels hopeless, often has suicidal thoughts, and again, becomes so antisocial that I get a feeling in my gut to not be social.
Should I tell my friends, /adv/? On one hand, they would be more understanding possibly. On the other hand, the stigma of BPD is awful. I just can't decide...
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BPD is borderline personality disorder, not bipolar. Don't get them mixed up.
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They're your friends. Probably for a reason. I'd tell a few, close friends. The ones you trust the most. They've probably noticed the easy you act. It might help them better understand you. Explain some things they've been worrying about. I'm not the most coherent right now, due to lack of sleep, but you get the idea.
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>>17996984
Wondering*, not worrying. Or hell, maybe both
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>>17996945
30yr old here, i have a lot of these symptoms too, maybe i should visit a doctor.....
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Hey anon, it's rough what you're going through right now. Right now, you need to take care of yourself and learn as much as you can about how to effectively manage your mood disorder. What helps me to manage mine is to attend support groups and group therapy. If you're in the US, NAMI is a great place to start. You're not alone and you'll get through this. It's not going to be easy and there'll be times you'll want to hang up the towel. Don't. You can do this. And share with a few friends you trust what's going on. If they're real, they'll support you. Explain to them how they can support you if they're up for it.
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>>17996945
14 year bipolar veteran from a bipolar family here.
Get medication. If your story is anything like the rest of ours, you'll think "ahh I don't need meds, I'm fine! everyone else has the problem! this is just how I feel normally!" or worse, you'll take the meds for a month or two and then say "I'm all cured! I dont have to take them anymore!"..
And then your next suicide attempt sobers you the fuck up and you realize this is going to be a lifelong struggle that requires daily management. Its easy to deny that theres a problem at first, but as time goes on your life will start to suffer as a result of the choices you make during your upswings and you'll slowly start to accept the diagnosis as part of who you are.
Once you accept the diagnosis, you can let others know that you have it. But not before. And there is no stigma if you handle it correctly. You have to be an adult and accept responsibility for your condition, and all the effects of that condition on your friends and family. When you DONT is when your friends and family start resenting you for not seeking treatment or trying to manage it.
The media really does us a disservice by misrepresenting what bi-polar actually looks like. Law and Order SVU Stablers mom is a good example. People have come to equate "bi-polar" with "crazy" and thats just not true. You just feel emotions a little differently at different times than everyone else. But that doesn't mean bi-polar decisions can't be harmful to others, which is why medication is required.
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>>17998186
Truth.
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