Wtf.

There's no such thing as "normal" when it comes to sex. There is, however, such a thing as compatibility. He may just have a lower sex drive than you, which is certainly a thing that happens. Speaking for myself, masturbation fills a very different need than sex does; it isn't a replacement, it's a complement (NOT a compliment! Different things!).

Asking him not to watch porn isn't a helpful or reasonable request, I think. You've asked him to stop watching porn because you want to have sex more often. Why don't you just say explicitly that you want to have sex more often? How about you start initiating sex instead of waiting for him to do it?

I think once a month for an unmarried couple that doesn't live together and isn't trying for a baby is a perfectly normal amount of sex and nothing to be alarmed about.

If you want more then sit down with him and talk about it.

I can't speak for other relationships but I've lived with my boyfriend a couple years now and we have sex even less than that. It's not because we're not attracted to eachother, some people just aren't as big on sex as others. I used to be in a relationship in which the guy would call me up wanting sex almost exactly once a month for a while, which I remembered and made note of because it would always land right on my period.

Biologically, I figured around once a month would make the most sense since that's how often women ovulate.

You have a shitty unhealthy sex life, and since apparently you have an unsolvable problem with it, you should split up and look for someone capable of giving proper dick

>>17954293
>Asking him not to watch porn isn't a helpful or reasonable request, I think
I agree completely with this.

The reason why I asked him to stop watching it was because I felt very uneasy about him paying for it and mutually masturbating on camera with the girls he pays. He would also phone sex with escorts which made me uncomfortable. I don't mind free porn but it was a daily occurrence leaving no desire for me when I got home from work. We feel a lot like best friends most nights.

I did tell him that I want more sex and he said he feels pressured when he feels like he HAS to do something. So I stopped asking or trying for it. When I initiate, he doesn't get hard or it takes a very long time for him to get in the mood. He has to be in control of it I think.

A sex expert that I spoke to a year or so ago told me he may have programmed himself accidentally to want sex on his terms or something.

>>17954296
This does make some sense, from a very technical point of view.
With that said:
I have a high sexual drive and I get even hornier? when I am in love.

>>17954306
My friend said similar things but I think that's a bit harsh.

>>17954307
>I felt very uneasy about him paying for it
Assuming your finances are separate, and he's not paying for this out of a shared budget, it isn't actually your business what he spends his money on. However...
>mutually masturbating on camera with the girls he pays
>phone sex with escorts
uh, that's not porn. That's webcam sex & phone sex. That's... well, some people might disagree, but a lot of people (myself included) would call that cheating. It doesn't come with the physical risks of actual PiV sex, but there's definitely an emotional boundary being crossed there.

>I did tell him that I want more sex and he said he feels pressured when he feels like he HAS to do something.
>When I initiate, he doesn't get hard
The more I hear about this guy, the more it sounds like he just isn't willing to take the steps to satisfy you. That's not just incompatibility, that's being inconsiderate & selfishness.

There's only a few days a month when my girlfriend doesn't want sex. I can't be the only one. Some couples like to play lots of sex games and whatever.

You've been together 3 years, surely you can discuss it?

>>17954325
>Assuming your finances are separate, and he's not paying for this out of a shared budget, it isn't actually your business what he spends his money on. However...

Again, I agree but not when he struggles to pay for other things because of it. Money is not an issue, it never has been but the fact that his porn has to be interactive, is an issue. It's bordering a too personal space that I am uncomfortable with and he knows it.

>>17954325
>The more I hear about this guy, the more it sounds like he just isn't willing to take the steps to satisfy you. That's not just incompatibility, that's being inconsiderate & selfishness.

It's very strange because he is the most selfless and sweetest person I have ever met... the problem is purely in the bedroom.


I honestly just think it's purely an attraction thing. I don't think he is attracted to me and I am very fine with that, I just want to know so I can move on with my life.

>>17954327
>You've been together 3 years, surely you can discuss it?
Not really because he acts weird for a few days after a discussion. I think he feels guilty about it and that's not the result I want. I want him to be more in tune with me sexually.

>>17954312

It's harsh but that's the truth.

It'd be one thing if you were happy with it. But you're not having your needs fulfilled. Both of you are masturbating instead of having sex, even though you see each other daily, apparently with nothing stopping you from actually having sex. And your guy isn't willing to stop to make up for it.

So unless sex is secondary to you, he either hit your rack or hit the road

Not to mention he might be getting some pussy on the side

>>17954325
It's okay if you think it is okay and isn't hiding it. There are people who openly have sex with other people.

>>17954372
Yes, but that clearly does not apply to OP's situation.