ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

How often do girls get horny

>>17950478
I cant be 100% sure because everyone is different, but based on me and girls I know, more than what you expect. Also there are girls with exceptionally high sex drives, and girls who are just not interested in sex. I would say tl;dr it depends

Why the fuck do I keep attracting white women all the fucking time?

For example I had two equally attractive white and hispanic girls in one of my college classes. I tried talking to the hispanic girl and nothing. The white girl would be on my dick with me not even applying effort. Im really not even interested in white women, half the time they are off coal burning anyway. Im not sure what they are looking for, it;'s a little early to be out searching for a beta provider. Im not even rich, I barely have money for me.

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Girls, what do you think of my tinder bio? Im trying to find someone to go on little coffee or movie dates.
"I'm an extroverted guy looking for a fun person to be with. Not necessarily extroverted too but one who can tolerate my craziness and eccentric bunch of friends.
I have a pretty twisted sense of humor that isn't exactly PC.
Nerd stuff
Netflix and movies
Video games
Music and shows bonus points for weird music.
Hot or iced coffee
Not looking for hookups.
Let's get to know each other.
I swipe right on girls with good bios. "

Any guys that do a fair bit of online dating, your input is welcome too.

>>17949845
>>17949862
Another anon chirping in to say that love and depression are not linked. In fact, that's why love can be so dangerous to someone with depression. The initial hormonal excitement can make some of the symptoms feel less, which can make us rely on that feeling. Lots of people get addicted to that energy.

>>17949831
This is tricky because she is a victim of sexual assault. Is she seeing a therapist? Because she damn well should be. I would even suggest that you see a couple's therapist, preferably someone sex positive. Maybe even a sex therapist.
When I had this issue, I tried scheduling sex. Making a whole date night thing.
Some suggestions I'd have for you is to move slow. I mean literally. For another girl, grabbing her and pushing her against the wall would be exciting and a turn on. For me, that would make me panic. Even just him moving his hand quickly up to grab my boob would get me a little panicky. I would go, "Oh god oh god, he wants me to get horny. I'm gonna have to give him head again. I hope he cums quicker this time. I can't do this I can't do this"
Better would be like, a slow back massage, leading into a kiss on her back, leading into slowly kissing her neck, leading into rubbing her thighs, and then circling around her vulva, glancing over her clitoris. If she responds at all, move into rubbing her clitoris and fingering her.

Something she might have to do is grit her teeth through the panic. Tell her your whole plan and then present the idea of trying to do this whole thing without her stopping it. Just to see if she'll like it more when she relaxes a bit.
This is partially how I got through my issues, but the problem comes in that she's a victim of assault. So this could put her back into a very very bad place.

So that's why I think you should get a therapist to help the two of you out. You're in over your head.

>>17950556
/soc/ does that stuff, take it there. We don't do that stuff.

Put my number into a girls phone today. An hour later I realized I put 7260 as rather than 7620.

Should I just wait until I see her in class again on Tuesday to explain I gave the wrong number, or would looking up her email in the campus directory seem like a desperate move?

>>17950556
Your bio is terrible.

Keep it short. Two, three sentences at most.
Make it funny.
Stop excusing yourself for who you are.
Get some hobbies worth mentioning, or not say anything at all - it's a boring list that makes you sound like the male version of a basic bitch.
Lat part has a weird "I'm desperate for relationship" vibe.

Also, pic isn't great. Change angle.

>>17950520
can someone fucking help me here, instead of answering basic social interactions questions?
>>17950577
no don't search here fucking email in the campus directory you idiot. Wait until you are in class, better yet you should wait to see if she brings it up. Id personally wait until the end of class to see if she brings it up and if she doesn't I would say hey I think i gave you the wrong number last class.

>>17950577
Is there a reason for her to contact you (like, you're working on a project together or something)? If not, I'd wait.

>>17950627
>>17950520
Because it's a stupid question that doesn't have an easy answer

>>17950576
Fair enough, duly noted.
>>17950582
Thanks for the feedback.

>>17950678
no shit it doesn't have an easy answer, why the fuck would I ask it if it did? Obviously if the answer was easy I wouldn't be asking it.

This shit is confusing me and I don't understand it, so Im asking for advice/help with it.

27m. Was a complete virgin until a few weeks ago. Never had any relationships either.

I've been dating this girl for 2 months now. She's great, adorable, funny and kind. No woman was ever so good to me. I've met her online and we slept on the first date. After that i fell for her fast and pushed hard to see her as often as possible.

However, somewhere down the road something changed. I've began noticing all those little flaws about her and I began struggling to find her attractive. One day I could be looking at her and think she looks beautiful, then another day I would find her completely unnatractive. One day I would think I'm in love and the next I would think about breaking up. I thought I was anxious that things were getting more serious or depression was kicking in again, but this has been going on for weeks now and it's driving me insane.

She's a fantastic girl and I love hanging out with her. I try desperately to fall in love with her, but I can't even decide on something so basic as whether I find her pretty or not. Im so torn over what I feel towards her that I have this impeding fear that this relationship is doomed to fail. I can see that she's starting to fall for me and I'm terrified I'll end up hurting her.

What the hell is wrong with me? I feel like I should just end this. But at the same time I love spending time with her and I hope that something happens and I can go back to how I felt at the start. I don't want to lose her but at the same time the idea of being with her long term fills me with dread.

>>17950696
Sounds like nerves/fear more than anything else. It happens to me too. If we're anything similar you're just EXTREMELY nervous about this whole thing, so you're sub consciously searching for an "out" to go back to normalcy--being alone.

Power through it, it comes and goes in waves.

How easy is it for you to get wet and how often does it happen

Is a manly man allowed to use vegan, GMO free, paraben free, cruelty free, sulfates free, soy free shampoo and conditioner?

>>17950752
Yes. Guys who take care of themselves are sexy.

What shampoo, manly man?

>>17950695
You're not really convincing me to help you, entitled brat.

>>17950752

They are not allowed to doubt their sexuality on the basis of the products they use, though. The fact that you ask this raises more than one red flags.

>>17950766
I assumed by your initial response you were not going to help. I'd love some help though, since not even google is working.

>>17950704

I thought the same and I kept pushing these thoughts away. When I start thinking that I'm not attracted to her, I pull out this one photo where she looks great and that calms me down. But lately, when she's around I get obsessed with every little physical detail and my mind goes crazy. I thought that with time I would find her more even more attractive, but in fact the opposite has happened. And yet I do vividly remember that when we first met I found her really cute.

At the same time, I have no problem getting aroused from just sitting next to her. Yet after we have sex I'm filled with guilt and remorse.

I want to power through it but what if this won't stop? There are times when I find her legitimately beautiful, but lately these moments are overshadowed by the negative thoughts. I no longer know which are my true feelings anymore.

>>17950759
Nature's Gate Enriching Biotin + Bamboo shampoo
Nature's Gate Shine Enhancing Henna + Avocado conditioner
I used it for the first time today and it feels pretty good. I expected it to be weaker than common products with harsh chemicals.

>>17950770
:(
I am manly, I swear!

Girl

Is there any way that I can non-creepily compliment this girl for the next time I speak to her?

>>17950941
>I am manly, I swear!

Then you would just do you and not worry about what kind of shampoo you use.

Guys: If you could nut anywhere on/in a girl, where would you nut? In other words, what's your #1 over everything else?

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Girls and guys

Why is kissing basically nothing in modern society?

>Actors make out on screen for money
>girls and guys makeout at bars and clubs right after meeting
>on NYE random people kiss

Why is this so "normal"? I've always thought this was a intimate act that you do with someone you like.

>>17950520
Are you white?

>>17951003
in her mouth

>>17950737
Depends on where in my cycle I am. If you're talking specifically arousal though, only my boyfriend can do that for me. Turns me on like a faucet.

>>17950752
As long as that shit isn't unecessarily expensive

>>17951027
yeah I am white, Im pale and have brown hair/eyes.

>>17951013
I think it's an intimate act too. I've only ever kissed my partner and I'm very thankful I saved my first kiss for him.

>>17951052
Then why the hell do you wonder why people your race are attracted to you?
It is normal.

do boobs ever feel heavy

>>17951052
Well then that explains it.

Guys:
Do you ever think about your exes' bodies? My boyfriend's ex had the nicest boobs I've seen in person, but mine are pancakes. I'm genuinely curious if he misses them, but I'm sure he'd think it was bait and launch into a sea of compliments.

>>17951058
Bc I see white girls with other races of men. So I dont understand why they would want me. Then the few times I tried to get other races of girls it did not work. Other than a few asian girls.
>>17951061
not really... see above

>>17951003
>>17951030
I second this.

>>17951065
>Bc I see white girls with other races of men. So I dont understand why they would want me. Then the few times I tried to get other races of girls it did not work. Other than a few asian girls.

Most white girls have a preference for white guys. Most races do, actually. If you watch dating site statistics white guys are those with best reply rates among all races, and the ones who get more replies from white girls too.

>>17951060
Yes and it sucks. I don't even have big boobs (32C), but when I work out without a sports bra I am dying. Also, when I am about to start my period, my boobs swell a bit and it feels like I am carrying a bunch of weight on my chest

>>17951054

Well, I think that's good!

I just have a hard time grasping tho how it's so normal now. It seems as casual as shaking someone's hand...

>>17951063

Curious, but do you ever think about your ex's dick or his body in general?

>>17951065
Like the ther anon said, statistically white women go for and get with white men the vast majority of the time. Look at marriage statistics too. The vast majority of people marry within their race.

>>17951088
Not that anon, but very rarely, a random thought of my ex pops into my head, then I immediately think "ew wtf was that about, brain." then it makes me remember how horrible he was and I immediately grow more and more disgusted.

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>>17951084
>I don't even have big boobs (32C)
>tfw 32A

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Ladies,

what makes a man husband material instead of just a fling/boyfriend? What traits, accomplishments, goals, attitude etc. do you expect of him that are essential in him being "the one" and differentiate him from the others you've dated?

>>17951088
He's my first boyfriend so I have no point of reference for thinking about exes. I was a sick recluse for most of my life and he has a wealth of dating experience.

>>17951106
I wouldn't get into a relationship with a guy in the first place if I didn't think he was husband material

>>17951077
Dating sites aren't real life though. If most races do, I have white girls all over me and other races not so much.

I don't know I just feel like since I see white girls with black guys whenever a white girl is interested I just think she is trying to cuck me or wants a beta provider(even though im poor, but I guess they really wouldnt know).

>>17951093
I wasn't talking about marriage, people take into account their culture not what they find attractive for marriage.

Thanks to both of you for trying to help, Im still fucking lost.

>>17951104
Honestly, when I was an A cup, before my boobs grew to a C, you really don't feel much of a difference. If I don't wear a bra, I'm still virtually flat, like mosquito bites flat. My boobs don't even look like other C's but it's the only cup size they fit in, so I am still C by default

>>17951118
I think you're just experiencing confirmation bias with the black guy thing, or maybe your personal experience isn't representative of the whole. People choose their own race the majority of the time for casual sex, dating, and marriage.

>>17951106
I don't have big distinctions because I never called "boyfriend" a guy who wasn't husband material to me.
Some basics are:
>Physically attractive, desirable, sexually compatible with me.
>Emotionally intelligent, communicative
>A good partner, attentive, loving
>Intellectually compatible with me, challenging, interesting
>Driven, ambitious, accomplished
>Shares my views on life, desires the same things I want

It is about compatibility, more than about singular qualities.

>>17951111

Nice quads


I'm a 27 year old guy who's a recluse. I worry that a future girlfriend (if I ever get one) might think about her exs over me since she will definetly be full of experience

>>17950948
I guess what I mean is that I already know the girl, and we speak semi-regularly.

And what I was planning to do would be to have a compliment like “I really like talking to you” be in it. Maybe with the overall message as “Hey, I really enjoy talking to you and I would want to take you ________ this weekend, if you are still up to it.”

>>17951060
Yes. It's horrible. I'm like a 10D (don't know what that is in American system) and sport is painful.

Girls

have you ever been in a situation where you where with a guy friend and you secretly wish he would start to rape you?

>>17951212
To rape me? No, of course not.

To make a move, yes.

General question

Is it bad if a 26 year old decent looking guy has gone his whole life without a girlfriend, and only ever he sex once?

Is this actually a bad thing? What I mean is, am I wrong for this?

I've had other guys tell me "dude you need to USE YOUR DICK" "stop wasting yourself!"

>>17951212
No, what the fuck? And isn't rape by definition unwanted?

>>17951219
No. Personally, the having lost your virginity to casual sex is bad to me, but don't let your friends pressure you into stupid stuff for no reason.

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>friends with girl online
>develop feelings
>rejected me
>constantly talks about this other guy to me
>doesn't give a shit what I say and ignores me at times

I'm really jealous and it feels shit, I know I should remove her from my life but it seems so hard I'll be so lonely but at the same time I think what the fuck am I doing.

>>17951229

They pressured me into having sex when I was 20. And it was a terrible experience. I haven't had sex since because it wasn't enjoyable at all, so why would I do it again? I think people must really be overhyping it Tbh..

Girls

So I was with talking a lot with a girl that is a friend of a friend ofc because I wanted to score her and maybe a potential gf.

We were at this party together, i made a move, she rejected and said "no". I said "ok fine" and left to talk with an other girl to score.

She then for some reason got jealous or something, started screaming at me, made a huge scene with comments like "so what just because I said no im not interrested now!?!?"

Like "ofc course?" I am not interested in you more if you tell me no.

What was the problem? She really expected me to flirt hard with her to become a friend?

Do girls find having done military service attractive

>>17951271

Not girl.

But that greatly depends on where you specifically live. Where I live is full of Liberals. So I never tell girls I was in the military.

>>17951240

She's psycho and you dodged a bullet.
whatever it is you like about her, unlearn that before you fail to dodge the next one and couple up with another crazy.

>>17951271
Depends.

>>17951271
Lots of women find men in uniforms attractive. But for having done military service? It'll vary on the girl. If they're the liberal sort like the anon mentioned they might not like it.

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>>17950472
>How do I know if a relationship has an uneven power dynamic?
My friend and I have known each other since middle school, he's a year older, 6'5 and good looking. I'm 6', also good looking, and really anxious/depressed. Sometimes it feels like he pulls a subconscious "ok buddy" and treats me as a lesser (I know because I used to do that to a lot of people) and it's getting on my nerves.
>Wat do
We're both nice people and I'm certain he doesn't know what he's doing.

>>17951240
She's crazy. That's all there is to it.

Girls

What sort of activities (not foreplay, I mean BEFORE touching) get you in the mood for sex? I have been with my lady for 6 years and it can be kinda difficult for me to get her in the mood. I understand that it's normal at this point in our relationship, but I'm just interested in new ideas.

>>17951348

Keep in mind this might not apply to other women.

But being like, aggressively into me. Not aggressive like choking. But absolutely fascinated with me, my body, my actions. Keep in mind that long before you get in bed, she's putting on a sort of performance. This may be less so because of the age of the relationship, but think back to when it was fresh.

Maybe she went to the restroom while you were in line, and she comes back - let her catch you checking her out. If she finishes changing for your date and comes out in a slightly low cut top, maybe just run your finger up the collar of the shirt. I shouldnt have to say this but hell take her out on a date if you haven't in a while. Some couples tend to forget and lunch dates turn into obligatory we better pick up lunch before we get home type deals.

I'm have trouble physically and mentally (anxiety) to penetrate fat asses (no joke). Wat do?
I don't have this problem with skinny girls with nice asses.

>>17951326

What doed this exactly mean

>>17951063
Sometimes, but mostly when I'm single and left with my imagination. When I have another person who's actually interested in me, my attention is directed at them.

For girls

So I think this girl that I'm romantically interested in is dealing with depression/emotional issues and has shut me out and shut our relationship to a grinding halt because of it. It's been a few weeks since we've had a conversation and long story short of what's been said since then is that I told her she can talk to me if she wants and she's said she's not interested in anything romantic right now. Any insight if there's anything I could say or do? Or is waiting for her to feel better and message me the best bet? I'm just afraid she'll meet someone else or just forget about me since we don't live in the same town right now.

I pushed my first serious gf away when I was depressed and now I realize how much it blows being on the other side. I'm also afraid I've created this delusional narrative in my head where I can "save her" from her depression, but I'm not really even sure that's the problem even though there are a lot of clues pointing towards it.

>>17951348
Washing the dishes if I'm stressed. Massages with no ulterior motives.

>>17951003
vagina #creampielife
>>17951063
yes, but not when i'm with someone else

Females please help i met up with a girl i met had a good time next day suggest a sleep over only to talk according ro her. I ask for a night and then she says well yea since im guessing to nite is to late. Did i accedently reject her signal. If so what do

>>17951482
Well you cant 'save her' because depressed people will always see something as horribly bad. But you can assist her. Ive explained it as building a ladder for the princess to climb down herself, not carrying her. If you havent known her very long theres a good chance she doesnt really like you and she couldnt find a better way to tell you. I've done that, and its a shitty thing to do but you give someone attention and they dont care whos attached to it.

If you really like her and you think she actually liked you, talk to her less than daily and never initiate anything romantic. (Unless she was really into that before?) Talk about things you couldnt care less about but she would. Her parents, Her pets,a game/movie/book she likes. And if she says leave her alone, leave her alone. If she says 'i dont want to talk' show her you understand and come back in a few days.

>>17951556
No. she wants you to sugest tonight.
She wants to have a 'sleep over talk' tonight.

>>17951390
Why do you need to fuck the fatter girls? Its your preference, dont sleep with fat chicks if you dont like them

>>17951583
I'm talking about average girls with fat asses, not obese monsters.

>>17951271
Have done- yes
Is currently doing- not so much

>>17951598
OH. Well still if you cant bring youself to, dont. Not meant to be

>>17951579
Say i snoozed on the opportunity whats my course of action

>>17951571
Well I didn't know her very long, but it did seem like she really liked me, then all of a sudden she didn't. We went on a date and we had a great time, she was talking about future dates, mentioned meeting her family, then she just stopped really responding over the next couple days. I'm used to relationships fading out, but not just disintegrating like that so it feels odd. Every girl I've even dated there's been a clear "breaking point" where things went wrong, but nothing like that happened this time, so maybe my perception is distorted by my experience with relationships and my own depression. I definitely want to help because I like her and I know how much this sucks, but of course I do have my own intent of staying romantically viable and not just a guy that she can tell all her problems to. Thanks for the advice, wise anon.

>>17951037
Does it feel like you've peed yourself a little

What is squirting?

Asking for a friend.

>>17951737

it's a orgasm that's so strong for a woman that it causes her bladder to compress and it causes piss to be forced out.

That's real science. Not bullshit.

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>>17951104
Cup sizes scale. You're probably imagining a 36C. A 32C is the same as a 36A
I wear 28DD, 30D, 32C, 34B, or 36A's. Different brands will fit better at a different sister size. If someone saw me, they'd call me "an A cup"
You have some DFC there anon, at 32A. I'm a little jealous, honestly. My boobs are an awkward in between size. And they like to drift towards my armpits.

>>17951440
Exactly that. It depends. It depends on their stance on war, on killing, on experience, on religion, on terrorism, on environmentalism, on the color green, IT FUCKING DEPENDS, THERE ARE LIKE 3 BILLION WOMEN ON THIS PLANET WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU

Girls:

A girl I sat next to in a class last semester sent me a message out of the blue asking what I was up to and suggested that we hang out next semester. I haven't really talked to her in a month and a half. Are the chances that she wants to go out?

Guys: i have to stop hanging out woth my guy friend as much right? People always think we are dating , including the guy i like. I am not interested in my guy friend and he likes another girl.. we dont flirt with each other. I dont touch him or hug him. We just hurl abuse at each other like siblings would. I call him a dumb fucking retard and he calls me a disappointment. I dont think that is flirting but i guess other people do? I have social anxiety and we have the same friends so we usually hang out togethet. But i am tired of people thinking we are dating.

>>17952077
Okay, then don't see him any more.

>>17952083
We also live in the same shared apartment and I thought maybe there is something else I could do rather than hang out with him less, but I guess there isn't. I will find new friends

>>17952086
Well if you're in the same apartment don't just ignore the guy. Shit I don't know, I would say just take the shit people give you in stride and continue with your life as usual. Something will happen to change this eventually anyways.

>>17952103
Thanks. Yeah lol i wont ignore him. But I do think I shouldnt be hanging out with him this much anyway. I have been using him as a social crutch. I dont hang out with the other roommates this much. But yeah I will also take it in stride and live my own life

Question to quasisexuals,

Should I give the silent treatment to a narcissist with other brain problems (say, bipolar and major depression, followed by easy agitation, even possibly early-set dementia)

Or should I just continue to speak to it as a person?

I've been insulted so many times, it's killing me inside, however, I have to live with it for a while until I saved up enough to leave (which should be in 2 months).

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>>17951813
I know how bra sizing works you mongoloid, we have the same band size so she's at least bigger than me. That's why her saying she doesn't even have big boobs makes me REEEEEEEEE

>>17951721
>a little

>>17952077
The fuck? He sounds like your best friend so keep hanging out with him. Just because people think you're dating doesn't mean you should just bin a friendship because of what others think.

dated my ex for 3 years. broke up because we had an argument. there wasn't any good reason for it. Ive been dating this new girl for the past year. my ex and i were closer than the new girl and i.
but my ex and i had been talking for the last couple months just casually texting. im debating getting back together with my ex, or see if i get closer to the new girl. thoughts?

>>17952290
Going back to an ex after this amount of time is retarded. You talking to her is what's causing your doubts about the new girl. You subconsciously trying to find a reason to ditch the new girl for your ex.

I also assume the new girl doesn't know your texting your ex either so that's also pretty shitty.

>>17952294
the trouble is that Im not so sure that the new girl and i are a good match. That in fact the relationship i had with my ex was much better in a lot of ways. i just dont want to be stuck with somebody im not that into for another year.

p.s. i see the new girl maybe once a week due to my work being out of town. not long distance, but just busy/ conflicting schedules

>>17952296
Have you considered that you never got over your ex?

>>17952298
Ive considered that. i mean...for me those 3 years were the best of my life. its almost as if i tried to fill the void with some other girl. However im at a crossroads of what to do. be with my ex or the new girl.

>>17952302
Well what did you argue over to end the relationship in the first place?

>>17952305 it was the stupidest thing. I was insecure about her feelings. little did i realize she was acting weird because i was acting weird. we werent showing how much we really cared. Out of anger I just said: "lets see how much you love me". and i broke up with her. I was wrong. we should have talked about it and things would have been fine. but i feel almost unworthy of her now.
my ex has told me she still loves me.

>>17952310
I really don't know what you should do then. If the new girl isn't going well and you think you have a chance at your ex, do it I guess.

>>17952310
Yeah it sounds like you need to figure yourself/your own fucking life out before you try to be in a relationship.

>>17950472

How do I meet older women (40s-50s)? Older women have been attracted to me before but I was too shy. Where can I go to interact with a large pool of single older women? Is there anywhere else other than bars btw, I hate bars.

>Date guy for 3 month, really into him
>Goes away for a month on a work trip
>Very busy with work + shitty timezones, we talk very little even if we put a lot of effort into it
>Comes home tuesday
>Will go to see his family for the weekend
>We hang out briefly because I was busy, but we agreed to hang out Thursday night
>He doesn't show up because he got busy at work
>I get upset
>He acts very passive-aggressive, basically treats me like I'm a bitch because I got frustrated when he didn't show up
>He tells me he's going to turn off his phone and we'll talk on next tuesday

I don't even think I should bother talking to him again, when he comes home on tuesday.
Am I unreasonable?

>>17952637
I'd still give him a chance. Work is a pretty good reason.

>>17952637
Not going to talk to him because you are upset and want to punish him, or not going to talk to him because you're just done and are ending the relationship?

>>17952637
Work can do that. It has fucked with my relationship pretty bad in the past but that's how it is. I used to come home and not say anything, I'd just sit down and phase out to TV then sleep.

He's probably got enough stress going on with work besides having this on his mind too.

>>17952648
I'm not mad at him because he has to work. I supported his decision to go on the work trip, I always reassure him that it doesn't matter if he has to work as long as we have time for each other, I am fine with doing little sacrifices. I know he cares about his career and I try to do my best to help him.

I'm mad at him because he doesn't value my time and didn't even bother letting me know he was late until he was an hour late.
I'm mad at him because of the passive-aggressive behaviour he has today - if he apologised, came up with an alternative plan to spend time together in the next few days and then treated me nicely today I would have been happy, but treating me like he hasn't done anything wrong, I'm crazy for being upset and "I'm not going to talk to you till tuesday" pisses me off even more.

I just don't honestly want to be treated like trash.

>>17952651
Ending the relationship. I don't punish people, that's silly.

>>17952660
I don't want to cause stress, I really don't. I care about him a lot and I want him to be happy. But he acted like a jerk, and he doesn't even feel sorry about it.

>>17952665
>But he acted like a jerk, and he doesn't even feel sorry about it.
Believe me, with shit like this, you don't think and don't feel. I ended up shouting at my gf and getting mad pretty often because of the way work was making me feel. I'd cool off after I'd had a day or two off but then I'd reset into aggression as soon as I started back. There was no stopping it until I eventually quit which is when things got better.

>>17952043
Well I mean, she said to hang out next semester right? She must have been somewhat understanding that there was going to be this gap in seeing one another at the least. However, I'm assuming the text based communication stopped for a reason. Did conversation peter out?

Regardless though, all you can do is send that message when you get back to school asking if she wants to do something. She'll either say yes or no/nothing at all. Can't really say anything about the chances, but like I said, according to what I'm reading it was her saying next semester so she should be at least expecting it.

>>17952670
I don't see him quitting his job any soon, he just got a promotion.
He's not aggressive usually, he doesn't get mad at me on a regular basis.
He isn't even aggressive now to be fair, but he gives me short replies ("Okay"/"Sure) or explains to me how he hasn't done anything wrong and basically I'm a crazy bitch since I got upset.
It is also really annoying how he wants to basically ignore me, seems like he wants to punish me for getting upset. He knows how much I hate when we don't talk for long periods of time, and made it a point to exchange at least a couple of texts a day when he was away because of this. It seems very disrespectful.

EX called me too cynical and said I always see negative in things, she broke up with me. My question for the ladies is - is there a way I can show I want to change? I genuinely want to be that person she wanted me to be in the first place. How do I demonstrate that I'm moving towards that without being too clingy? She said she find me physically still very attractive, and I love her a lot so I thought maybe if I change she would reconsider trying again.

>>17952690
Well that's how work is. He's probably a little annoyed that you don't understand how he's feeling.

>>17952710
I understand he's stressed and frustrated, but what am I supposed to do? Accept everything with a smile on my face? Just let him ignore the dates he has with me? Be punished for being upset when he acts like a jerk?
He's not the president of the US, he can sneak a text if he's going to be late or not going to show up at all.

I just think I'll end it now before it gets any worse, this kind of behaviour is really unacceptable to me.

>>17952723
Maybe try the ultimatum first of either he keeps to dates and actually talks to you or you're done.

what's your favorite place to get jizzed on

>>17952752
Stomach or thighs. Going to go with belly because I was not on birth control when I experienced this so it was more relaxed than him aiming for my upper legs.

>>17952705
That's a pretty fundamental part of your being. It won't be easy. Going to therapy would help.
Generally crawling back to an ex and saying, "I can change!!!" is a bad idea. You two have established a dynamic and it would be even harder for you to change with her.

Do you think there's anything wrong with being a cynic? Before she said this, have you struggled with that part of yourself? I know some cynics are proud and aggressive with who they are.

>>17952119
If you completely ignore your mom, it might blow up in your face when she gets pissed off at you. Spend as much time as you can outside of the house.
When I lived with my mom, I turned into a robot around her and just went through the motions, but generally was emotionally turned off. I wouldn't do the normal conversational things, like asking questions to continue a story or anything. But I would smile and say, "Oh, that's cool"
I mean, that didn't stop her from saying, "Why are you being so terrible to me" but at least it was less frequent and less panicked than when I ignored her outright.

How do I go about talking to a girl I dont even know and vice versa?

I added her on snapchat earlier this week. I haven't sent anything or said anything. We just viewed one another's stories.

She knows I smoke, drive a beatup 99 Chevy truck, and listen to Post Malone. There seems to be a mexican guy that is randomly in her snaps, but I dont give a fuck.

What do I do or say?

>>17952752
In my mouth or creampie. Easy clean up, good taste, feel special vs intimacy of being able to cling to him during orgasm

>>17952770
You really shouldn't use the pullout method. There's sperm in precum.

>>17952784
How did you exchange snapchats if you don't even know her?
Send her a snap saying "hey, how's it going" and just start things. Personally I hate snapchat for the initial getting to know someone, but I guess a lot of people use it for that.

>>17952787
It wasn't pull out, we didn't do penetration. We would masturbate pressed together and he would finish like this (sometimes).

girls who meet these criteria

>sorta hot like a 6-7.5 (could probably be an 8 if you didnt have some weird shit like say, cankles)
>are sluts
>sometimes have bfs
>go through phases where you bitch about wanting a bf

if you were posting on facebook about how you need to find a boyfriend/husband/whatever would you assume a try trying to talking is trying to be ur bf?

>>17952792
It was on her twitter bio. And I was like, fuck it. She added me. Bingo bango bongo, now I'm stuck here. I feel like that reply is too simple, unless I made it bizaare and unique. Idk honestly

Females

Would you date an involuntary celibate?

>>17951336
If you're both nice people just try to talk about it. Make it clear that its a serious thing for you, but don't get angry if he says he doesn't think its true. Even if he denies at first, just the fact that you brought it up might make him think about it next time.
>>17951737
>>17951745
Its not properly piss, I mean if your bladder is full its going to come out, but I read somewhere that if the bladder is empty, it fills up quickly with "squirt" (should be like extremely diluted piss iirc) which is then expelled. A guy I know had a girl who could squirt and he says it doesnt smell/taste like piss

>>17952797
Snap chat kind of has to be simple. because if you write too much, they can't read it all before the snap stops. And if you use the chat function, you get confused on what they're replying to when you can't see the previous chat. That's why I don't like it for these things.

>>17952794
I kind of assume that if a guy reaches out to me, he's probably interested in me, yeah.

>>17952805
I completely understand, and desu, Im just trying to be more appealing to her rather than just another guy trying to be old fashioned. What would be something you send to someone you just added?

>>17952812
Something cool, maybe? Like a landscape picture or a pet picture

>>17951737
A physical response women can have when climaxing that causes them to leak out clear fluid. Been tested as at least partly piss, but I have squirted often myself and there's absolutely no way it is simply straightforwardly piss. It doesn't smell remotely like urine when fresh, it's clear even on days my pee is yellow golden from drinking little, and the chance of squirting happening is not related to how full my bladder is.

No doubt there's traces of piss in there at least, though. Also, it doesn't look spectacular like in porn, at least not on the regular - mine never came literally gushing out.

>>17952801
Depends on the reason why he is celibate.
But in general, if I like him, why not?

>>17952801
I don't give a fuck about past sex life and the idea of blowing a virgin's mind and making his first time amazing is hot stuff.

What I do care about is other factors that might be related to being inexperienced. I'm not looking for someone to be with me solely because I gave him a chance and no one else did. I'm not interested in being with someone who thinks sex is like porn and love like Disney movies. Or who sees me as a stepping stone to get with someone else once he's a bit more experienced.

So once more, it all boils down to the individual. Being an incel by itself isn't a dealbreaker.

>>17952817
I Live in LA and all I see are Mexicans. My poodle is pretty bland. Should I just send a pic of the bottle of my champagne and say "anyone up for BP with champagne?" or send her a pic of my spray cans and say "graffiti run" or something?

>>17952822
Can you give me some advice? I want to see if I'm able to squirt

>>17951240
She wanted you to try a little harder, usually when I speak to couples who are together a long time the girl rejects the guy multiple times before winning her over. Females love that narrative, and try to emulate it irl. She probably really liked you but wanted to play hard to get.

>>17951271
I find the ones who havent even hit 25 and are already approaching the wall are most attractive to the military guys. They want babies asap, and military guys provide that along with stable income. The government takes real good care of soldiers and their families. For a female, its living life in EZ mode.

>>17950472
Girls that have cheated,
why did you do it?
did he ever found out?

My gf got a chip in her arm that is supposed to prevent pregnancy for 3 years. Any girls familiar with this? Should I still wear condoms just to be safe?

>>17952903
The implant is one of the best birth control methods out there, it's more than 99% effective.

If you want to increase the safety you can of course wear condoms too, but it's relatively safe to have sex without condoms.

Make sure you're tested for STDs and get tested periodically.

how do girls feel about bears? I'm 5'5" and chubby so I'm considering lifting and id probably end up with that kind of body

>>17952872
I'm afraid I can't. For me it was never a trick, a special kind of being stimulated (or special place)... when I first learned how to masturbate and have orgasms, it was just the way I'd come. It took me a long effort to teach myself to have an orgasm without squirting so there was no learning process to acquire it.

I do know that some women who don't naturally squirt have a response like that when the upper inside of their vagina gets stroked softly and firmly with two fingers. But that's not the only "magic tip" I've heard and my gut feeling is that it's just an individual thing that is triggered by different stimuli in different women.

I do notice now that I've toned down the squirting reflex, that I mostly get the urge to squirt after a lot of intense build up. And if it's any consolation, it was never crazy pleasurable for me. Yeah it has a wild feeling and it feels good to "let it all out", but the mess to clean up and the delay between going for another round wasn't worth it to me. It's not some sort of superorgasm, at least not to me.

In the meantime I would just try to use lots of different things, and if you feel an urge to "pee" try to relax as much as possible and not get obsessed with the physical sensation of that.

>>17952914
>>17952903
It's THE most effective form of contraception to date. 99.95% effective.

>>17952896
Nope

>>17952932
Hormonal IUD actually works just as well/better.
But, yeah, one of the best contraceptives that we have.

Why is it that all girls seem to like getting spanked? Is it an effect of a generation raised on porn?

>>17952920
Thank you, this was actually helpful info

>>17952944
Porn absolutely does shape expectations and preferences. But I feel that spanking (the literal act, not so much elaborate role play) is a pretty natural thing to do. The ass isn't sensitive to pain and slapping it provides an element of passion/intensity that can't be achieved with groping/stroking/mere touching, without causing actual pain. Also the sound is just strangely... explicit, like it really drives the point home that you are fleshy bodies rubbing up/into each other.

>>17952944
I actually don't know why I like it. I just do

>>17952787
How does it feel being creampied

>>17952942
Hormonal IUD is 99.8% effective. It also had a higher chance of slipping out of place than an arm implant, but still way up there in effectiveness.

https://www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/unintendedpregnancy/pdf/contraceptive_methods_508.pdf

>>17952951
Since the first time it happened it was an accident (condom broke) I always associate it with that dreadful feeling that something went wrong. I hate feeling semen dripping down

>>17952752
Creampies by far. Mouth is a close second.
I also really like being cum on my tummy/tits, ass and face.

>>17952948
This explanation might make sense if spankings were a more gender neutral thing.

>>17952944
It's a dominating gesture

>>17952974
I would agree if ass appreciation in itself were a more equal thing, but the female ass is in general seen as a much more sexual/sexy bodypart.

Also, I spank men. Not as in, making them lie in my lap then spanking, but a slap on the ass here and there absolutely. And I don't even particularly care for male asses at all.

>>17952974
There's a component of submissiveness in being spanked.
Me and my boyfriend did some light femdom stuff and he loves being spanked when he's being submissive.
Most guys aren't submissive.

>>17952980
>I would agree if ass appreciation in itself were a more equal thing

Are you saying that men appreciate asses more, but also that women like have their asses appreciated more?

>>17952991
I was thinking of the first but think they are both true. It's a body part plenty of men are a bit awkward about when it comes to themselves. It fits the popular feminine appeal of curviness and softness more than the hard masculine ideal. Plus it is insane how stigmatized anything butt-related is for straight men and I think that plays at least a minor role as well. Where do you draw the line? If getting anally fingered by your girl is faggy, is her groping and slapping your ass not?

>>17952944
all the women I've ever know to enjoy getting spanked also enjoy being dominated, so I think its just part of the dom/sub thing

>>17952946
Glad to hear it, I hope you manage to find what works for you!

>>17952973
That's hot

Girls and guys

Anyone here feel that their body isn't good enough for sex?

I'm not fat, nor am I holocaust skinny, but even still I don't feel comfortable with sex. I don't feel comfortable being naked infront of a girl.

>>17953010
Virtually everyone feels like that sometimes. My body's not perfect obviously but I have zero reason to complain, and I cringe a bit thinking back of times I didn't want full light or whatever because I was fretting over having some spots on my back.

I try to fight this attitude and for me the best argument is that when I have sex, I hardly get turned on thinking of what a perfect flawless man I am fucking. It's rather the other way around: I am aroused by that embarrassing noise he couldn't hold in because it felt too good, I'm wet for his personal smell that's not some intoxicating perfume but the real scent of his fabric softener and skin sweat. I could go on and on with listing examples but at the end of the day I get off on the idea that this is a regular, normal man with annoying habits and flaws, who in 95-99% of his life is not minding his sexual side and just being a student or a cashier or a son, that I am doing some seriously dirty stuff with.

Basically, there is nothing unattractive to me about the idea of having sex with a "normal" person. And obviously most of mankind has no issues with that. Sex isn't about being a model, it's about being human.

>>17953025

That was an interesting read.

I dunno. the only 2 times I've ever had sex happened in a car.. so we weren't even fully naked. My shirt never came off, hers didn't either. I've never stood completely naked infront of a girl before or cuddled with one either. Those experiences happened 6 years ago.

>>17953069
I don't know, not trying to downplay how discouraging and saddening this feeling is, but I do think you'd be presently surprised to discover more of that. First of all, if you've only had sex two times it most likely wasn't in a committed, trusted situation. Obviously that makes a world of difference in itself - being naked is vulnerable, you are opening yourself up to be rejected on the basis of really private, sensitive stuff. It's not that strange to not dig that feeling around a stranger.

Secondly, some more stuff from personal experience. I struggled with this stuff when I was younger, and in fact sometimes still do. It's been a long time since I've had sex (by choice) and I notice that I find it more difficult to accept my body as it is without getting concrete confirmation that I'm okay. It almost feels like my body is my enemy because it needs to be okay enough to not scare people off - or even silently be disappointed.

But when I actually was with a guy I trusted and loved, I didn't give a fuck about being the most aesthetic woman in the world. Some of the happiest memories I have are of being so comfortable together that your standards change. He could rub my belly up and down after I ate a ton and I would just feel mellow and comfortable and not in the least ugly. He could tease me with my bodyhair and it would be a silly intimate thing between lovers that wasn't unsexy at all. Sure it felt great when I could tell he thought I looked hot, or when he complimented my legs or whatever. But those moments stand out because I didn't feel like he loved my body - I felt like he loved me as a human being and everything else came second. And I truly truly hope I made him feel the same way, I looked at him the same way at least.

And as for the sexiest memories I have, those are of moments when we were both so lost in the moment that we were hardly thinking about being anyone or anything at all... just feeling great sensations.

>>17953121
As for what you say with the shirt not coming off etc... I don't give a fuck if a guy has muscles. Now I don't particularly like them to begin with, but I have some friends who do like it and I know for a fact that they still don't fuck a guy -because- he has the right muscles. That's a bonus after he undresses. Even for a one night stand they fuck him because of how he smiled at them, how he looked at them, how being in his presence felt and how their body responded the first time he laid a hand on them. Not factual details about his physique.

Anything your shirtless self can show - odd nipples, utter lack or full landscape of bodyhair, a gut, whatever - it might not be ideal, but it will never be as much of a turn off as a guy who is that obviously and visibly holding back during sex. Not as much as a turn off as not being able to lie with your hearts pressed together and have all that skin contact.

>>17953010

If you aren't fat, you probably have nothing to worry about. Rarely would anyone have sex with someone they didn't find at least somewhat physically attractive, so the chances are your sex partner finds appealing enough. Plus, if you think about it sex is sort of ridiculous act, so everybody looks ridiculous doing it, regardless of what their body is like.

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if a girl compliments my hair, is that an indicator that she might be interested? or does she just like my hair. pic related.

and i'm not sure exactly how to reply in a flirty way. usually i just give a genuine thank you.

>>17953140

Could be either, could be both. At least I complement my guy friends if it's warranted and it's definitely not meant in a flirty way, just a compliment to cheer up someone's day. If it happens regularly though, she probably find you attractive.

>>17953140
Impossible to tell, it depends on the person, both are completely likely especially when you have striking hair as you obviously do.

Eh, I think it's a bit obnoxious to go overboard with giving a flirty response. If you really show her through your smile and eye contact that you are pleased with her liking some attribute of yours that is already attractive in itself. Anything more overt quickly becomes obnoxious in reply to a simple compliment so don't worry about that.

The biggest thing is to not deflect compliments. Really annoying and most of the time it just makes people look too faux humble to grace the giver of the compliment with their appreciation.

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>>17953121

>First of all, if you've only had sex two times it most likely wasn't in a committed, trusted situation

They definitely weren't. Infact they were really bad experiences.


Thing is i don't see how I'm suppose to meet a girl who i trust and love if I don't like the way I look? I look in the mirror sometimes and think "meh.. maybe in a few more years". I have started going to the gym again. I'm seeing improvements although small. But even still.. I'm not attractive. I'm 26 year old but look like
I'm 18..

Look at my gross birdchest...

Is a manly man allowed to like https://youtu.be/llyiQ4I-mcQ ?
What about Taylor Swift?

>>17953152
Sorry to hear that.

It depends, obviously if this is all consuming then yes you need to learn to accept yourself more before you can really start a healthy dynamic with someone else. But most people have hang ups and insecurities about themselves, be it because of appearance, personality, baggage or anything else, and it is also natural for the acceptance of other people to play a key role in accepting yourself. No one will ever fret as much over the details of how you look as you do.

Now I won't deny that my eye isn't as keen as that of a guy who has looked at many progress/inspirational pics and knows the male body from his own life. But your picture looks absolutely fine to me. It's just a healthy young male body, not ripped and not pudgy or emaciated. That's what most of mankind has had to offer throughout history. If you are straight you cannot expect to see all the appeal about yourself that a straight woman can (even still disregarding that the brunt of that's not in your body). Do you look at an average bodied woman and think she's disgusting? Probably not.

>>17953165

>Do you look at an average bodied woman and think she's disgusting?

True, I don't. But even still I feel unattractive, undesirable. I'm 26 and never had a girlfriend before either. Why? Because I don't feel like im good enough for a cute girl to invest her time into.

>>17953170
I don't think this is something you can solve through any reasoning. What's the rest of your life like? Do you have good relationships with your family, a fun variety of friends etc?

Focusing on what you are able to do with your life and what you can mean to others emotionally can ease some of the pressure for your looks.

>>17953179

not close with family at all. Parents went through a long divorce when I was in middle and high school. never got close to either parents or my brothers. I have a few friends, but most of them live far away for life reasons. So I only see them every few months. I get along with well with my co-workers, but they are all 10 years older than me and have a family and kids. So we don't hangout outside of work because of scheduling and they typically like to be with their families. 2 of my closest friends live overseas.

1 of those friends overseas. For a brief time we sort of had something special. We met once when I was on vacation. She was the only cute girl who's ever given me so much attention and smiled me so much. We never kissed or had sex or anything. But when I came home. She told me she liked me. We would talk nonstop. And I ended up really falling for her. I actually felt really comfortable around her, even with my body insecurities. Well. I booked tickets to go visit with her again, this time as more than a friend. But.. about a month before I went to go visit her. She met a guy in her hometown. so our thing ended.. I still visited with her, but she had a new boyfriend so obviously nothing happened. I met him.. he was a really great guy. He looked way better than me too. That shit really hurt Tbh. Because that girl really did care about me. She did a lot of nice things for me.. but it just proved to me my thoughts from years past.. I'm not good enough

If my crushes' friends start appearing in the 'people you may know' list in facebook does that mean i facebook-stalked her too much (happened about 1 month ago) or does it mean that she talked about me with her friends?

I've never had this happen before, even though i facebook-stalked my previous crushes as well...?

>>17953201
Yeah that's not a background that would make anyone feel secure. The thing is that this girl didn't even really know you well enough to compare him and you on a worthwhile basis. You don't know how much other factors (like not being good at being single) played into it. For all you know if the tables were turned, you would've been the guy from her home town who snatched her up before prettyboy got a chance. You can tell yourself that it is definite or likely that it would've been different but at the end of the day you cannot know that for sure, it's a thought that drags you down and adds nothing to your life.

Obviously this is going to be a long term issue for you so I would invest as much as you can in making changes in the present. Spend as much time with your coworkers as you can, it's fun to deal with people with a different age, they bring out different sides in you than age peers do and they have a different perspective. Hell, I think it will be easier to be frank with one of them and admit you would like more friends your age than with someone your own age. See if anyone has tips for cool local events (preferably free). Try to find new hobbies, even if you don't meet people through it, part of the goal is to acquire respect for yourself based on different things and not just how popular you are with women. Once you do meet someone, the more you have done, been through, tried etc the more you have to tell and show for your character.

Afk but will return to thread later. If I don't speak to you anymore personally then best of luck!!

Girls:
I'm a guy and I'm very often complimenting any girl, this includes strangers if it's the context of a party or something, about something they are wearing like a t-shirt or their trainers or their hair-dye color.
It's kind of a reflex, it just comes out and I can't help saying it.
I only say it when I genuinely think it looks good but is it awkward for a guy to compliment stuff like that out of the blue?

>>17953214

I do like being around my co-workers. But it causes me to act their age. They view me as the "young guy" at work. But they comment all the time saying "you act like an old man like us!". We discuss politics in detail a lot, and I watch the news and follow political figures a lot. Look at stocks, retirement plans. All that stuff because it's so frequently talked about. I sort of got absorbed into it. They all asked me after New Years "hey man, did you go meet some hotties on New Years?" When I told them all I did was sit at home, drink a beer and watch The Simpsons they said "wow, you're too young to celebrate the holidays like a retiree".. so honestly I don't think this is doing me any good..
Thanks for talking to me anyways anon. It gave me something to think about.

>>17953229
guy here but being genuine about it = good
doing it too much = bad

>>17951060
No. I don't know my size but I can go without a bra. (Usually wear bralettes because I don't really need more support.)

>>17950752
I use shampoo like that too. From Desert essence.

>>17953291
What the fuck is a bralette?

This feels like that time i learn about hair donuts.

>>17953299
Something like a bra without wires and padding. I've also recently learnt its name.

>>17952903
I never heard of this, where are you from?

>>17953025
My experience with women tells you may be an exception.

>>17952951
I don't really feel the cum itself, but I love the feeling of his skin on my skin, and the subtle twitches of his cock, and him grabbing me, shoving himself deep inside me.
There's also a great psychological aspect. It's like he's marking me his territory. I love it.

>>17953318
What, that women are turned off by male bodily "flaws"?
I'll report in as another women who is way more into the psychological than the visual aspect. I care more about how his body feels pressed up against mine.
You ever hear about the love for a "dad bod"?

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I've been talking to this girl for just over a month and Ive realised I like her, genuinely, not out of a perspective of lust and such but.because I'm genuinely interested in her and fell for her personality, looks being a bonus.

I was wondering, how long do I wait until I ask her out or confess. I've had many bad experience in the past and never had a proper gf, I've always rushed things too resulting in things not working out before they even begin, so I'm worried I'm going to fast however I fear if I wait too long, someone else may swoop in.

What do? I want to make her fall for me but I'm learning to accept results too whether they go to my liking alot, how would I build up our relationship from friends to that stage.

>>17953314
I know that the implant is used in the USA.

>>17953299
Wtf is a hair donut?

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>>17953352
It's a squishy foamy round thing

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>>17953371
used to make this.

I don't really come to /adv/ at all and it's probably been asked to death but;

Women, how does a perfect sex session look like to you? Do you want to orgasm before penetration? Do you like getting oral every time? What's some neat tricks & tips?

Thanks

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posting here more because I don't think my case should have an entiiiire thread

>be friends with grill, meet grill's sister, hang out for a day
>we have laughs, it's fun
>going home, friend gives hug as usual, sister gives hug too
>add sister on plebbook, accepts in 2 hours, text her 2 days later
>replies after a days and a bit, obviously doesn't check fb
>leaves reply, I reply after an hour or so, I leave a question (somewhat casual, about a presentation she had the next day)
>she hasn't replied in 2 days

is it worth leaving her another message to gimme her whatsapp or should I just wait god knows how long until/if she replies again?

I'm guessing it would speed things up but I get all insecure with shit like this and don't wanna seem too desperate
>which I am because I really like her desu

thought I was so over this shit a year ago ffs

>>17953421
I recently messaged a girl on FB, and she took like 3 or 4 days to reply. I replied 2 days later and asked her number after some small talk. Then she started exploding me with messages on whatsapp, lol. Set up a date that same evening.

Dude, just don't send another message if she don't reply. If she is interested, she WILL reply sooner or later.

Disclaimer: I'm a man. Ask a fisherman to teach you how to catch a fish, don't ask the fishes.

>>17953432
>don't ask the fish
now anon that's not very nice, I was actually curious how women see this sort of situation

I wanted to do what you said, but it always helps to hear it from someone else
I'll ask her out on whatsapp or w/e, otherwise planning is a nightmare for both of us

>fucking hate waiting
>I slept 4 hours for 3 days after I met her

>>17953432
oh and another thing

is it better to literally just ask for her number/whatsapp straight and simple or does it leave a better impression to add smth like "send me your whatsapp so we could talk more easily" or so

completely spaghetti

Is there anyone out there that doesn't use Whatsapp/Snapchat other bullshit?

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>>17950472
Posting here cuz don't want own thread.
GIRLS/boys would you sit on the following face for... reasons? Rate plz

>>17953447
No

>>17953463
Bumping for this faggot

>>17953443
Do what you think is right. For me I asked her out on a date at a set time and place. When she agreed, I simply said "What's your 06?" and that's all. I don't think you should say that as a first message.

Also calm down a little, keep your health in check player. Even if she doesn't know, she will sense it. From the way it sounds you are way more invested in her than she is in you which is a bad thing. Especially this early on.

Tip: approach other women and ask them out as well, and keep yourself busy with other stuff. Studies, sports, etc. Not for pussy, but for you. I'm currently dating 2 girls, but more is better if nothing is serious yet.

What the fuck are with girls on tinder and bull rings on their nose? I swear it's like every other swipe there's gotta be a giant hook of metal coming out of your damn nostrils. What is the appeal of that shit?

>>17953485
>what's your 06
>dutchbro

fine, I'll wait it out
if I'd be a "player" with another woman already I wouldn't be going through this shit in the first place
dunno if I'm invested, I just liked her

isn't it always like that tho? one of the two is more invested in the other than the other is
anyway, best of luck anon; I'm genuinely surprised socially/relationship-successful people are on this board

Do people just end up settling for someone?

Im a guy who is finishing college soon and I've come to realize I won't end up with the type of girl I want. Nothing to do with physical looks.

I know if I end up with a girl like this I will kind of be put off to sex, I'll fuck her but I wont be super into it. I think overall it make me lean more towards being apathetic to her, but not completely. It's important to mention, no kids.

Is this what normal people to do find someone?

>>17953489
Girls have no real personalities or interests, so they try to compensate that with their looks.

>>17953503

I thought settling was the only option, because rationally reality can't really match to expectations since real people make mistakes unlike ideals. Then I got damn lucky and found something even better, so I don't even know anymore. I'd say keep looking, but if something close enough comes along then settle.

Girls

What are some signs that you are just being nice towards a guy, while not actually being interested beyond being friends?

>>17953121
god this gave me a boner and a warm, fuzzy feeling i've never felt irl

i don't want to small talk and talk about a myriad of things i don't give a fuck about before reaching this stage tho, so whatever

>be beta fag
>have mild crush on a girl
>kind of trashy
>we go out once, not like an official date, just a feeling stuff out type of date
>don't ever hit her up after that
>phase eachother out
>have a few drunken nights where I hit on her, but never take it anywhere
>have GF for a few years
>be single for a few months now
>she comes up to my work
>not someone who would usually go there
>pretends to shop, but is clearly just there to talk to me
>keeps asking me questions, how I'm doing and stuff
>eventually gets something small I suggest for her
>tells me I should hit her up on facebook
>I check her facebook, nothing but asking people to hit her up on Snapchat, and pictures of her and her ex

Should I try and get some casual sex out of it, or just leave it alone? She's kinda trashy, not really my type, but she's easy and I haven't been laid in like 3 months.

>>17953540

when i'm not interested in not being more than friends with a dude but it seems like he's into me i usually just don't go out of my way to talk or hang out

to rephrase, i won't really try to send him shit that i think he'd like, or ask him a bunch of questions, or give him particularly detailed answers to the questions he asks me

>>17953578
Makes sense. But then a shy girl still may do all that stuff if they are interested.

Would you continue to carry on a conversation even if there is a clear way for you to cut it off?

Girls and guys


What does skin to skin contact feel like? I'm 28 years old and never felt that before

>>17953666
depends in who you do it with and your relationship with them.

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Girls and guys,

How do you approach someone you truly desire without becoming awkward?

>>17953761

Tell me more please. I don't know what kissing or skin contact is like. I've never even held someone's hand before

How do i get over a girl that I will most likely have no history with

so girls

do you think guys who like big dicks in porn are repressing gay/bi tendancies

or is it kind of like how a lot of girls will watch girl-on-girl but only sleep with guys

guys: do you prefer it when girls are colder with you?

when i am less affectionate to my boyfriend, he seems to get more attracted to me. he wants sex way more and sends me cute messages non stop. when i am really affectionate to him he likes it but its like his sex drive suddenly goes down and he doesn't text me as often. i don't know why the fuck this is

is the 'treat him mean, keep him keen' mantra true? because it seems like it

>>17953819
as surprising as it may seem, but it varies from person to person
you've obviously figured out your bf so that's good, in a way

I'm more or less the other way around, I like it when they act all bubbly and cute and playful, and that ends up in more relaxed and fun sex

all that being said I dislike these emotional games that people play in relationships, it's a bit childish

for anyone, really:

I need advice about what to do. So I've been talking with one of my coworkers a lot, and she's really nice and I feel really comfortable talking with her.

The thing is, I'm really hesitant about relationships after my last one. Long story short, my ex girlfriend and I were at a party, she told me about how she hooked up with two of the guys that were there, and then went home with one of them right after telling me.

Anyway, I'll be fine talking with her and will be really "normal" but then some days I remember my ex, how I felt after that, and back off completely. She's noticed this each time and will say something like "you're really quiet today, anon, is everything ok?" and sometimes I try to avoid her and she'll keep asking me how I'm doing. The other day she said I was acting "weirder than normal" then said that, if I wanted, she'd listen to me about whatever was eating me at the time. I didn't though and felt bad.

I don't get why she'll come off as concerned about me since we're just friends right now, but last week I was feeling really down and talking negatively about myself (i don't know why i do this, but I do) and she said "well, not that it matters, but i think you're really awesome and interesting :)" but then i just said "oh, thanks" which made me feel really bad because whenever I get in a down mood I just shoot down any kind words just to keep myself feeling bad.

I don't know what to do. On the one hand, I really like her and whenever I'm talking with her or hanging out things just feel right. On the other hand, I don't want a repeat of my last relationship and part of me would rather be alone forever than feel like that again.

What do I do? I don't want to bring up my ex girlfriend to her since I feel like that wouldn't be smart, and I don't want to outright tell her "i like you"

>>17953587
no. if there is a clear way to cut it off then i will not entertain the conversation any longer.

also let me be clear that i do talk to guys normally if they're my friends. i'm talking about those dudes who i think are nice or whatever but don't really have an interest in

>>17953840
Ah. I'm just trying to figure this girl.

She never contacts first, but when we do start talking she will put in effort to keep the conversation going. And they have run for upto 10 hrs easy.

>>17953447
Yes, I don't. Neither does my boyfriend.

I recently met a girl who share the similar interest and hobby. Actually I've stalked her socmed accounts for a while and I'm quite interested to her. How long I should keep the interaction around our hobbies before moving to more personal topic?

>>17953836
>I don't get why she'll come off as concerned about me since we're just friends right now,
I think it's curious that you're so shocked that a friend would be concerned for their friend. She sounds kind and patient. You should give her a chance and talk to her about what you're going through.

>>17953815
I don't really make that assumption. It doesn't really mean anything to me if the guy I'm with is bi. A lot of people are at least a little bi.

>>17953576
You have to decide for yourself if it's worth it. Does she seem a little crazy and would freak out a lot when she finds out that you don't want anything serious?

I'm a female(26) I look quite nice. A guy recently started messaging me, and he was quite into me. Since I was sigle and I started to like him I thought yeah give him a chance. So we started flirting but very lightly in a cute way, we met once, it went well. After a week from the meeting now he barely texting me back, he still hints that he is interested, we will go to an event together in 2 weeks. What happened? He lost interest? He became lazy? what do

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>>17950472
How do you deal with clingy girls?
>tfw currently in a relationship that sucks out ALL my spare time

>>17953947

What do you want to happen? Break up with her or make her take up less of your time?

Because if it's the second, you can be honest and tell her you need more "me" time (risking a break-up if she is so clingy) OR lying about having more work/study and less time to hang out (risking being found out).

Your pick.

>>17953933
>What happened?

That's what we have to ask you. Did something happen on the date? Did something happen in his life? You are the one that knows him, you are more qualified than us to identify "what happened".

>>17953933
Dont worry too much about it, he's most likely got other stuff on his mind as well. Or maybe he's started seeing somebody else, you could ask him this as a tease sometime, but careful not to spaghetti about it.

>>17953907
Just talk about what feels natural. If the opportunity to ask something "personal" arises, go ahead. Conversations should be fluid, not scripted :^)

>>17951013
Because you've bought into what the media tells you. Sure it's been devalued but try and kiss a stranger and see what happens.

>>17953463
I would if I found you interesting or stuff like that, do you intend to just ask a girl if she wants to sit on your face?

>>17953819
>guys: do you prefer it when girls are colder with you?

This entirely depends on how mature you are and how basic you are.

Pull that kind of shit on most 15 year olds, most of them will probably fall over themselves for this shit. Try this on someone who's 25. Probably half of them will call you on your shit and be like wtf. Do this to someon who's 35, you're going to get looked at like you're a child throwing a tantrum.

But that's all also assuming they're not a mental child too.

>>17953933
>I'm a female(26) I look quite nice. A guy recently started messaging me

Could be anything. Could be you met, and it was ok, but no real sparks happened for him so he's cooled off. Could be he met someone more interesting. Could be you met, and he liked you and started freaking out, then someone whispered in his ear that he needs to pretend to be aloof and contact you less, could be he's massively fucked in the head, could be you completely misread the situation.

Could be absolutely fucking anything.

Just go meet him in a couple weeks. That is the only way you'll know. Speculating between now and then will only drive you crazy, and make you more likely to do something stupid.

>>17953463
>Rate my pic

Go to >>>/soc/
You look sloppy as fuck. Trim your hair+beard.

>>17952637
>>Date guy for 3 month, really into him
>Am I unreasonable?

Depends.
Did he let you know he wouldn't be showing up? Or were you just sitting there waiting for him for hours?

If he let you know, you are overacting and being unreasonable. If he didn't and just left you hanging, he's kind of an inconsiderate dick.

Either way:

His career seems like a MAJOR part of his life and something that is a bigger priority than anything else right now.

If you cannot accept that and if you both aren't willing learn to work around that, there is little to no chance of this relationship working. Period.

girl.

Is it alright to look for a gf while having a chatubate account for when I'm extra horny

Girls

How can you tell if she is actually trying to let me down easily or if she's actually wanting to do something?

My friends GF's party is tomorrow night and I don't really want to go (I don't know anyone going but I initially said I'd go). I always knock back parties so I feel extra bad. How can I say I'm not going now?

>>17953229

Guy here.

As a precaution, I NEVER compliment a woman's appearance. I'm so used to this rule that, I was recently dragged to a strip club on a night out with the lads, got a lap-dance and the stripper asks what I liked about her. I said "Your accent".
Took me a good couple of minutes of listening to her laugh at that before I realised she was expected me to say her boobs or ass are great or some shit like that.

If you really need to compliment a girl for whatever reason (like she puts you on the spot and asks you what you like about her for instance), keep the compliments away from the body.

Asking as a guy: All the online dating advice I've read suggests that the guy has to be assertive in suggesting place and time.

However, she wants me to come to her town and not that it's really far away, but I'm not familiar about it at all.

Do I research a place and decide on a time or ask her to choose?

>>17953789

Guy here.

I don't.

It's easier. I just like people from a distance and enjoy the crush while it lasts. Why ruin a good thing?

>>17954468

Tell her you've never been around there and ask her to show you around. She'll know where all the fun stuff is.

My problem is here.
>>17954323

Responses from both genders welcome

Girls, if a guy is unadventurous, unambitious, not conventionally attractive, indecisive, unconfident, uncourageous, unmotivated, has little self esteem, is unskilled skill, not particularly passionate, has little wealth, is he doing a disservice by staying in the dating pool? Should he just remove himself?

Did I make a mistake or was I justified?

My girlfriend likes to do this thing where she randomly fondles me and bites me randomly over my body. I guess she thinks it's cute or something but I personally don't like it at all, it makes me uncomfortable and angry. I wouldn't be so bad if she did it once in a while but she does it all the time, almost every day and I have explicitly made it clear that i don't like it, several times before. It has gotten to a point that when she does it I have to freeze myself up to keep myself from throwing her off me or hurting her. She did it to me again, just a few minutes ago while we were watching videos on my laptop. I told her to stop and she outright refused so I decided to teach her a lesson. I moved her off me and held her in the couch with my right arm. She said stop but I refused to release her just like she refused to stop when i asked. She started biting me and pushing me away but of course i'm stronger than her. After about 2 minutes i let her go and she left, going into another room, not before throwing her iphone against the wall.

I dont really know what to make of this. Hoping to get someone else's take on what i did and the situation on a whole.

I walked into a class late on Wednesday. All the seats were full so I struggled to find a seat, as I moved to the back.

Some girl was nice enough to move her coat so that I could sit next to her. For some reason, she had her backpack and coat on her side seats that no one would sit right next to her. That's weird for a lecture theatre seating in a full class

So I sat next to her, and said thank you as I sat down.

I felt her keep glancing my way. she would look at my laptop, and she would keep looking at my face. For some reason I thought she was interested because of that.

After class, I decided to say hi to her. I said hi, but she either didn't hear it or ignored. I said "nice to meet you" louder and thanked her for moving her coat so that I could sit. She seemed nervous and fluttery, I couldn't tell if it was because she's interested or creeped out. I asked her name and if she has another class afterwards, which she does.

For some reason, she asked me to leave first when she saw I was all dressed up and ready to leave. So I did leave early, and I didn't look back so I don't know if she had other friends in class or just got creeped out.

I regretted not getting her number, and the next class I couldn't find her at all. I did see her swapping some classes during class, but couldn't tell if it was our class.

What did I do wrong? Did I seem creepy at all? I was only looking to thank her for her kindness, and slightly flirting

If a girl sleeps with someone a few times over a period of a few months and THEN changes her relationship status from single to "no info to show" what does that mean?

>>17953340
Bump

>>17953340
It may not have worked out in the past, but if you're just asking her out then sooner is better than later.

>>17954341
Anyone?

>>17954673
Give us an example.

Girls and guys

What are you suppose to do if you've had people tell you you're a decent looking person. But you don't FEEL attractive. Therfor you can't interact at all with the opposite sex past a platonic context and never have had a relationship?

>>17954697
Do you feel unattractive when you assess your appearance in the mirror, or when you imagine what someone else sees when they look at you?

>>17954702

>Do you feel unattractive when you assess your appearance in the mirror

Not in the mirror, I think I look average in the mirror. But when I see pictures of myself (since it appears non-mirrored) I feel absolutely disgusting.

>when you imagine what others see when they look at you?

Yes this too. I can't see why anyone would like me past the platonic context

Is it worth investing time in a girl who apparently is in love with someone but not in a relationship?

>>17950556
Saying "I swipe right for good bios" is kind of like saying "I'll wait for you" or "I'm a nice guy"

Why not something like "Outgoing, always looking for a new adventure. As strange as my strange company - I love toilet jokes."

Try to phrase your bio to be more concise, and less... Dweeby. Get a better picture too.

>Meet a girl I really like for a change
>Start trying to find reasons to keep her at a distance, because I don't trust my judgement when it comes to pretty girls

Is there any advice for getting out of this poisonous mindset? I date very exclusively, but every time I bother it just turns out worse and worse.

>>17954696
Girl is very enthusiastic and eager sounding about doing something. Even will go as far as agreeing to get together when it is left sorta vauge. But when I try to cement plans, she shys away from it. But she always sounds disappointed about it.

I'm a male and my current life plan is to essentially be a stay at home foster dad. I plan on getting a middle class job until I grow a family, but my plan at that point is to quit my job and focus on kids. For those of you who eventually want long term relationships, is being the main source of income for your family a deal breaker?

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>Liked a girl at work
>We went out twice
>Hooked up at a club, and it went bad
>Stopped talking
>She's been hitting up my friend as of late, my friend does not give a fuck about her but likes playing with her and relays the information back to me
>Told her over the phone how he wants to fuck her hard and make her paralyzed and she was liking it
>She starts talking about me
>Saying i was the worst hook up
>How she does not want my friend to like her as much as i did
>She just wants to suck dick basically and be treated like a whore
>She talks shit about me, tells him things i did on my date
>For instance my friend called and i said to her "it's so so and I'll call him later"
>She told HIM that and added in a few extra words
>She also starts calling my friend a "traitor" when he told her we are friends

Fucks her problem, what she trying to do?

I cant believe I wanted a relationship with this bitch, I didn't believe my friends when they told me how much of a fucking slut she is the instant they saw her.

My GF just told me that she does self harm and that it's to the point that she's bleeding a sufficient amount. She says that it helps her deal with her depression and that she likes pain. Should I do something cause I'm having some major problems with this? She wants me to just ignore it and she feels like it's okay and totally alright with it. Sorry if this isn't the place to ask this kind of question.

>>17954933
Personally, yes that would be a deal breaker for me. But there are women out there who want to be the breadwinner with a SAHD, even if they are rare. My aunt is a teacher and her busband does the cooking and domestic work, with some collectable reselling on the side. They have had 5 kids, 3 adopted, and host foreign orphans regularly.

>>17954808
Probably not

Fembots,i finaly got a date and she has Christian values. As in she has never had sex and has asked if it would be ok to hold my hand on the first date. My questions is: will me not being a virgin due to me being an idiot in highschool and falling for the classroom slut meme make her not like me? I mean,i had sex with her atleast 90 times and i feel like that'd be an issue to her and i really really dont want to miss out on someone like her.

>>17954972
Maybe? You'd have to ask her.

>>17954958

Get her help. Even if for some reason it fucks your relationship, you know it's the right thing to do. She needs help

>>17954985
That's what I feel like I have to do. She says now that it's the equivalent of doing drugs for her, but she doesn't do them.

>>17954972
That'll be an issue most likely, you might have to repent if she's catholic

>>17954992

Cutting is only feeding her depression and is going to get worse and worse. She could do serious damage to herself.

Make sure she gets help soon

>>17955000
Thank you for the help!

>>17955005

Just remember. There is a chance this may ruin your relationship. But it's the right thing.

You won't look back and regret turning her life around, even if it ends your relationship as long as it helps her. But you defintely would feel a ton of guilt if you didn't get her help, and something bad happened to her.

Good luck

Gonna post this before I go to bed.
>Never had a love life, rejected or friend zoned by every girl I've ever tried to get with
>Grow up socially awkward, end up with a good group of friends
>Meet this one girl at work about a year ago, we become great friends rather quickly
>Coworkers even have a nickname for the two of us
>Don't think much of it because hey we're friends
>Around 4-5 months ago she says her boyfriend cheated on her
>Get pissed, help her through it because that's what friends are for
>Grow closer throughout the semester, we help each other out with anxiety and shit
>At the end of the semester (like a month ago at least), her boyfriend dumps her without reason over text
>I'm infuriated because of how shitty that is
>Try my best to help her through it, she says she wants to kill herself at some point
>Make sure she doesn't, she eventually kind of gets better after figuring out why her boyfriend dumped her
>Realize that I'm in love with her amongst all this
>Realize that there's no good way out of this one
>She was still in love with her boyfriend and he's in love with her but needs a break
>I don't want to say anything to her and end up losing my best friend by either getting rejected or somehow hurting her
>I don't want to not say anything because it's killing me
>She went away at the beginning of the month and will be back early February
>Told myself the space would be good
>Still think about her on a regular basis
>Want to tell her how I feel when she comes back, but know I'm going to regret it because nothing ever works out for me
I cut out some stuff here and there because I have to be up for work in 7 hours, but I wanted to get it out. I think I'm really fucked, guys. I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't.

>>17954152
Lol die now you silly nigger

>>17950472
Question for Femanons:
Do you want your man's genitals to be bald, trim, hairy as fuck, or trim with a unique design (like a lightning bolt)?

>>17955235
Trim

>>17955235
My preference is trimmed into the shape of a heart outlining his cock and balls

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>>17955235
>(like a lightning bolt)?

>>17955235
>Hairy = Yes
>Unkempt and looking like there might be weasels in that brush = No

I find most guys who get rid of it have three issues
1) Stubble. That shit rubbing yo clit hurts worse than rug rash.
2) Smoother than a babies bottom puts us in mind of babies not men.
3) You look like your hoping the "Take away the bush and the trees look bigger" really works. Insecurity about your size ain't sexy.

because this is the only remotely active thread I'll ask here

My heart has been broken 3 weeks ago. Every day since then I had this feeling in my throat like I have to throw up.
How the fuck do I make it go away
How do I make it stop

>>17955329
Have a cry and move the fuck on with your life.

>>17955332
I tried my best but I just can't cry

>>17955022

Even broken love triangles are complicated, there's the chance that she might go back. I've seen it happen

There are a TON of things that factor into all of this

>chemistry between you two
>how close you are/time spent with her
>level of interaction with you and her bf
>amount of communication per day
>long term plans
>sex life
>if he was her first bf/vice versa
>family circles
>friend circles
>level of sacrifice you are willing to make
>ego
>beliefs/politics
>trust

At this point I'm just spamming you with shit, but if tl;dr

Don't act right away when she gets back. Think hard on what's good for her and good for you.

Do girls like male feet?

>>17955374
to do what with them anon?
maybe if they work in a shoe store or so

>>17954396
Suck it up and go, don't be the phantom boyfriend that never shows up at important events (its your gf's party, its pretty damn important)

girls, why dont u hit on guys like guys hit on girls

it seems so much more appropriate for you to do it then for them

>>17955489
Because we don't need to

>>17955489
Yeah I've never felt the desire or the need to

>>17955504
>>17955564

you say you dont need to which means u select your men from those that hit on you.

thats like you endorsing solicitation.

then girls complain about puas and guys catcalling them

does not compute

What is the PROPER way to kill myself?

>>17955581
I've never complained about PUAs and catcalling. People who do are annoying.

I'm taking a girl out on a date tonight. We've been dating for a week now and we had drunken sex on the first date. I want to ask her tonight if I can come to her place after the dinner but I really don't know how.

Do I go something like "wanna hang out at your place?" This is so much harder when sober.

>>17955581
Do you sincerely think that the man going "EEEEY GIRL NICE JUICY ASS YOU GOT THERE WOULD LIKE TO TASTE IT" is hoping you smile at him and give him your number?

I mean sure, he might love that weird ass turn of events, but he's doing it to get a laugh/rise out of his friends or to entertain himself. It's just a kind of social game that is slightly more good natured than outright laughing at people passing by.

I'm with this girl for about 2 months now. I'm in my latest 20s and she's 4 years younger than me. Prior to meeting her I never had sex or anything resembling a relationship.

We hooked up after meeting online and we've been dating since then.

She's really fun to be around. She's nice, chill, takes my boring ass to a bunch of places I've never knew about and has made a lot of effort to learn more about my hobbies. But for some reason I just can't fall for her.

Part of it is physical. She can be really cute and the things she does are adorable. But she's not really my type. She's slightly chubby and I'm just not wowed by her face or sense of style. At the same time, sex is great and I have no problem kissing her or getting aroused.

Personality wise, she's a great person. On the surface it seems like we have loads of shared interests, but it doesn't seem like she gets me in the way I want my partner to.

So while I love to hang out with her and I'm having loads of fun, I feel something along the lines of a deep friendship with loads of sex.

So what do I do? Do I break up? Do I talk to her about liking her but not feeling the love? Or do I quit overthinking this and just keep on hanging out with her in hopes that something develops? Sometimes when I'm with her I don't feel like I'm 100% there.

I don't want to string her along so I'd like to make sure both of us are on the same page. How do I approach this?

>>17955653
Why don't you invite her back to your place? That seems easier and more polite than inviting yourself over.

>>17955678
Yeah, break up. It can happen that people feel this way about someone (adorable, not arousing etc) but it changes once they start to see them in a romantic and/or sexual light. You've been a couple with this girl for two months, if by now your feelings haven't significantly changed there is no point in stringing her along seeing if they ever do.

It's going to suck, but realize that if she could read this and realize you had sex with her while feeling this way about her, there's no way she would still want anything to do with you either.

>>17955690

Thanks. The thing is there's been times when I felt like I was falling for her, but my feelings seem to fluctuate and I'm really confused about this. One day I'm totally attracted to her. The next I'm not. Our relationship is also somewhat complicated. We actually talked about becoming official a few weeks back and I was willing to try it. But then she suddenly backed out of it and wanted to go back to things being less serious. Her ex broke up with her shortly before we met and I think that could be the reason. So I'm really worried about hurting her. At the same time, I just don't really know what she is after. If she just wants to hang out and have fun then I'm down with that. But if she's after something serious but just not over her ex then I'm not sure if I can fill that role. I don't feel like I have enough experience and knowledge about my own preferences to dive into something deeper.

I don't want to straight up break up with her. She has exams right now so that would be a dick move as she's pretty stressed. Also, if possible I would like to keep her as a friend, so I was hoping to maybe move this relationship to a non-sexual space.

Fuck this is so confusing I don't know what I'm doing. I love hanging out with her but I feel guilty after we have sex or kiss.

>>17955711
This is the reason why people say that sex ruins friendships. It's not because of some magical law of nature but because transitioning back from lovers to "mere" friends is almost always painful. Heartbreaking even, if the other person -had- really fallen for their friend.
Now this doesn't have to be the case. Maybe she has slightly double feelings as well. Maybe she's not the most emotional girl or maybe she is and was already sensing your lack of total infatuation. It's not impossible that she'll be open towards still being friends, it's just very unlikely and you should try to accept now that it is unlikely that she can be salvaged as a friend.

I won't go into whatever cold feet she had because I have no clue what was happening in her life/head/heart, but it only makes the bigger picture less stable still.
And you are rightfully worried about hurting her. These feelings are not something you can discuss with her. If you were unsure whether you wanted a relationship or being single for some time, you could talk about it with her. If you were wondering whether there was a future for the two of you based on your compatibility - that can be discussed like adults.
You cannot tell her "hey you know, when we're actually getting down to business I can get it up for you but I'm just not wowed by you outside of sex... or well I mean you're a great friend but as a woman..." seriously picture someone you might be in love with telling you this and imagine what that would do to your sense of masculinity and your self esteem. That is my primary concern. I feel that with these thoughts in your head you have no business being with her, especially if she's a sweet girl another guy might adore. I understand not dumping her before/during exams but do it before she grows much more attached (still).

>>17955711
How do you think she will react if you talk to her about this? (Maybe after her exams) maybe she will be willing to wait a bit, or to remain friends. I think she has to know how you feel, maybe she could even help you understand everything better. It sure is a complicated situation

>>17955754
In this anon
>>17955749
After reading this, maybe straight up telling her might not be the best course of action. I still think I would like to know why someone would leave me, but everyone is different

Should I confess and ask someone out first or ask them to hang out first then do it.

But if If I ask em to.hang out it'd be in a couple weeks before we do

>>17955759
You can tell her that you don't feel like you like her as much as she deserves or whatever, just under no circumstances go into details.

>>17955749
>>17955754
>>17955759
>>17955765

Thank you all. Obviously I would never tell her I'm not fully attracted to her, as that would be extremely hurtful.

I don't quite understand what's going on in my head. There's definitely times when Ive been infatuated with her. After we had sex on our first date, I was the one pushing to meet her and I was going crazy over her. Initially she was very reluctant to dive into something deeper and later told me that when we met she was just looking to have some fun, but later felt guilty about it. I sensed that maybe she wasn't fully over her ex.

Throughout our relationship, I've been telling her that I have some doubts about it, that I'm unsure and that I stress out whether it's going to work out. But at the same time I vividly remember moments when we were laying in bed and I would think that myself 'damn, I think I'm falling for her'. Around the same time she's been asking me over where this is heading and I took it that she wanted something more serious. I got really freaked out at first, but grew more comfortable with the idea and then later told her that we could try becoming official.

Then two weeks later she suddenly became distant and I began to miss her and feel like shit. I thought she was going break up with me and I felt heart broken. But just before we were supposed to meet to talk about it, I began feeling calm, almost looking forward to being alone again.

In the end we just apologized to each other and decided to just live in the moment and not put any labels on ourselves. But I couldnt really get over that feeling of wanting to be alone again.

That's the summary of it all. This is all mixed with stress, legitimately happy moments, feeling in love and unnatractive to her and guilt. When we're not together most of my time is spent on thinking everything through and analyzing every little detail. But I'm none the wiser.

>>17955836
It sounds like you were almost falling for her, then when she became distant you braced yourself for the worst and decided being alone is not that bad?
I don't know if there's anyone that can truly help you understand your feelings, but maybe you could try a therapist, or meditation, or anything that could clear your head. I dont know. Best of luck anyway, I hope that however it may go you will both be happy, in time

>>17955836

Meant 'feeling in love and not attracted to her'

Fuck, I really need to do something about it. Whats worse is that I went from a total recluse to hanging out a lot with her group of friends. All of them think we're official and they all seem to like me a lot and are very happy for her. Meanwhile I'm bottling this all inside and it's stressing me out.

I'd love to talk to her about it but she has exams for another month and I don't want to put additional stress on her.

>>17955850

That's kind of it. However, I was going back and forth between falling for her and wanting to end it from the start. One week everything would be great, the next I would be stressed and feel nothing.

It's almost as if whenever things got more serious, or I met some of her friends I would back out and look for reasons why it won't work out.

Not to mention, I've been alone for so many years that I must have developed an image of a perfect relationship and my dream girl and reality just doesn't live up to it. So everytime things seem less than perfect I began overanalyzing it.

Moreso, I've been diagnosed with depression in the past but been fine for years. Lately however, some of it is coming back. I can't sleep and the stress is affecting my work.

Either way. As I write this I realize this is not how it should be. I know relationships can be confusing but I feel like I should be alone for a while and resolve this on my own before I invite someone into my life.

She just stayed at my place last night and we had sex twice and I'm feeling guilty as hell. We're meeting again to day so I feel I need to speak up. She doesn't deserve to deal with this bullshit.

>>17955489
I do. I've initiated every relationship I've had. I guess it comes from being an awkward teenager who no one ever asked out on dates, so I figured that if I want something, I should go get it.

>>17955329
Be patient with yourself and give yourself time. You need time to grieve. If you just smother the feelings, bottling it up, you won't deal with them. Let yourself feel.

>>17954933
If I could get a job to do this sort of thing, this is actually ideal for me. The idea of having kids and dedicating my life to them freaks me out. I feel like I'd lose myself. Being able to trust my husband at home makes me more willing to have kids.
I would wonder if I would end up getting a little micro-managey, since I have a lot of opinions on how kids should be raised.

I'd suggest trying to talk to women who want to be childfree. They might be like me, and imagining themselves doing all the work. They might reconsider if you're a SAHD.

>>17954587
She might be slightly crazy and scared of people, thus the coat/backpack thing. She saw that you had nowhere to sit, and she realized she'd be an asshole if she kept it up.
You didn't do anything wrong. She's just a little nutty.

>>17955686
I forgot to mention that I am currently living with my parents.

>>17954581
She sounds super immature. You kind of fought fire with fire, though. I understand your reaction and I probably would have done the same thing.
You should sit her down and calmly tell her that it makes you feel invalidated when she ignores you when you say stop. Tell her that you shouldn't ignore her when she says stop, and the same thing should apply to her.

I can't believe she threw her phone against the wall. Wow.

Bloody hell /adv/.

I sent a girl i've been texting and had a single date with me wearing a medieval tunic at a museum.

She later responded with herself coming back from the gym taking a video of herself. I swear she slightly zoomed in on her chest and stomach and after a little while later invited me to dinner.

Is she into me? Should i go out and buy an actual tunic?

File: 7799463243a4d6a71324e51c71922859.png (361KB, 750x750px) Image search: [Google]

361KB, 750x750px

Girls, or guys too I guess, How long should I wait before considering myself to be ghosted?

>>17953792
Warm and that safeness feeling , at least for me it is.

>>17954908
Put the ball in her court, back down and see if she tries to initiate. Make it clear that the ball is in her court.

If she doesn't get back to you, she was letting you down easy.

>>17955764
Bump.

It'd be a couple weeks before we'd get to hang out*