How to Deal with Ostracization

Quotes from older thread

You want the advice of someone that is going through some fucked up shit himself? Like, a literal conspiracy of a group of people harassing, insulting, and just... fucking with my head for the last few months?

Fuck em'

Fuuuuuuckkkkkkkkk em'

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Quotes from older thread

You seem to already have your answer. People like this can't be reasoned with, and if they didn't trust you enough to doubt this person, you're better off without them. You're only hurting yourself by trying to stay invested in this community. I know these kinds of people, and they are toxic; they'll make your life miserable if you maintain contact with them. I know it's scary to try to make new friends from scratch, but no matter how it goes, you win by severing ties with these terrible people. Good luck.

Quotes from older thread

>>17947787 #
This.

OP, just turn your back on them and walk away. Trust me, I've done it lots of times and it never fails.

>>17947170 (OP) #
Can we have a more specific series of events please?

>>17949254
I had false rape allegations against me when I was a teenager because my ex girlfriend was a manipulative bitch. I had people saying they were going to see me locked up and get my ass beat and all kinds of crazy shit. You know what happened?

Nothing. Because the people who lie usually don't get away with it, and most people only care for short bursts of time, especially if it didn't happen to them. You didn't do anything so they can't prove anything. If you aren't going to get away from this community who will forever brand you as something you're not then you're just going to have to ignore it sit the rest of your time.

Also I agree with >>17949267. Give us the deets.

>>17949288

Forgive me, but this is going to be really long.

I went to highschool with a girl, lets call her Amber. Amber was a couple years older than me because she was held back a couple grades due to her health at the time. Amber is the kinda girl that fit into any crowd, was super charismatic and charming and of my few friends all of them including myself fell for her right away.

I remember one of the first times I went to her house she told me about this other girl she hung out with on MSN. They had a very special relationship, a relationship I would one day fill after Amber was bored of this girl on MSN. Amber would bait this girl on MSN to keep her around and liking her, and then treated her horribly and ignored her to see just how mean she could be to this poor girl and how minimal of an effort she would have to put into their relationship to keep her around. I was 15 at the time and didn't really understand it for what it was, and when it started happening to me it took years of bullying, harassment, and abuse to block her from all aspects of my life. I guess I'm still not over it.

>>17949378

My friends became her friends, who one at a time became Amber's girlfriends or romantic interest, and it seem she had romantic feelings for all of our group of friends at one point asides from me. Admittedly I was just jealous and that wasn't healthy, so I reavaluated the kind of relationship that I wanted with her. I wanted friendship with her so I started going on dates with guys and exploring myself sexually with other people. This was when I was nineteen back at home from college for the summer. When she found out about me getting serious with some guy for the first time ever in our relationship as friends did she take sexual advances towards me.

I was at her house in the basement where her bedroom was watching classic transformers. I hadn't really watched it before, but it was comical of a show to say the least. It hasn't dated very well. As I was engrossed with watching the TV she took off her shirt exposing her breasts. Amber said she was hot asking if it was okay. I wasn't completely over her at the time as I was still sexually attracted to her, so I didn't know how to react. But if I wanted to stay friends with her and didn't want things to be weird between us I just let her do her thing and focused more on the TV than I did her. Asides we were two girls and like- girls can be naked around each other right? I honestly didn't know at the time and thinking back on it I wish I just went home then.

>>17949379

She started masturbating on the bed behind me and I couldn't ignore it any longer. I ask if she was okay, if she wanted me to leave so she could do that and when she didn't answer I asked if she wanted me to join in. She just continued to masterbate in front of me and with her guidence I was eating her out.

It was the first time I've been with a girl before and despite being a girl myself I don't know what the fuck I'm doing down there. It's completely different than just going at yourself, so I asked for her guidence on what to do and asked what spots felt good. Needless to say it took a long time and it wasn't the greatest for her or me. I asked after she had gotten off if she wanted to reciprocate on me and she said no and feeling a little hurt and very confused I started to get ready to go home at which point she said I hope this relieves the tension between us.

I was so flustered. How could she say that? I've been actively trying to get over her, she used me to sexually gradify herself and did nothing to return the feeling, and what more was berating and considering the entire time we were in bed together.

It happened once more after that because I had hoped if I did it better a second time it might have changed something, but it was such a pitiful attempt on my part I lost my courage and motivation half way through it and spent the rest of the night at her place awake and just wanting to go home.

>>17949384

I stopped contact with her for years, I'm living in a new city and she's all the way out on the other side of the country. Some time two years ago in April, about a week after I witnessed a murder she comes out of the wood work wanting to be chummy. I explain to her what she did had hurt me and I wasn't over it and that's why I stopped contact. She apologised profusely saying she never knew how that made me feel, or why I left and sent me gifts of all kinds and did all these things for me that she knew I would like so we would be friends again. Having some physical space and giving things time to settle made the pain a little more distant so I took her back as a friend.

It didn't take long however for her to start treating me the same way as she did in high school, and it got worse when the emotions of the murder I witnessed were too much for me to handle. I spent less time online and more time in therapy trying to get help and she didn't appreciate me being too unhealthy to roleplay and started demanding things of me like past presents she got me that I wasn't willing to give. For one thing in particular that she wanted back she tried several different methods of manipulation to try and get it back. "Like you never use it so you should just give it to me, you never should have had it in the first place I bent over backwards to give it to you." And when I said I was uncomfortable by constantly being asked for it and that my answer was going to be no she lost her shit saying that I don't have the right to be uncomfortable and that this isn't harassment, so I blocked her on everything.

>>17949388

Found out two months later she hacked into accounts of mine that she had passwords for to give herself things of mine that she didn't have permission to grab. She blocked people on my accounts that had to deal with the community we both share so it looked like to me I was blocked from the community when I was not. My attempts to have a moderator look into my account hacking was met with her rape allegations as well as her revealing personal things about my past such as me being abused by my family, my brother's mental illness which renders him childlike, my mother's cancer, and my past self harm. Everyone that is a part of that community has easy access to that post she made about me which comes with a drawing she made of myself calling my a rapist among other terrible things and is still accessible to this day having never been taken down off the front page of the format she used to post it.

The rape aligations if you haven't guessed already is a butchering and a lie about what happened those two nights in summer several years ago. Two nights she's apologized to me for before using it to turn others against me.

Anyone with even a little bit of information on me knows who she's talking about in that post and to be honest I can't even read it all the way through because of how horrible it is. I didn't do anything to deserve this and the affects of her harassment still affects me because her lies spread to people I know in real life and people of whom we share an online community with. If I can't have justice I would at least like it to stop from getting even worse, but I don't know what to do or who to go to for help.

Sorry if this was long, or poorly written. It was a lot to text about and I started to become emotional by the end. But if I'm going to explain it in detail I needed as much room as I took to write it.

>>17949378
>>17949379
>>17949384
>>17949388
>>17949392
Holy shit, this is exactly why I get anxiety attacks just by thinking about letting someone get close. Seriously, if these people ignore someone hacking into and messing with your stuff just because of what she said about your personal life and family then those people in the online community are just as bad as her. Just leave, fuck them all.

>>17949384

I meant to say berating and condescending the entire time.

>>17949427

Nobody in the community knows her like like the people in her offline life know her. There's a few other girls I've spoke with who were even pressured into sexual acts by her who are disgusted by the memories of being pushed into those sexual acts.

Her calling me a rapist might mean didly squat over the internet, but my mother works with her mother, and so does some of the girl's mothers that Amber's pushed into sexual actions. Even if nothing can be proved in a court of law because it's just she said she said it can still affect my every day life regardless of me leaving this community behind. The things she did will affect me for life. Maybe less so as time goes by, but no matter how far I remove myself from the situation her words and her influence affects my family who can't move away.

As far as I know she still talks about be behind her back tell who gods knows about my brother, my father, and my mother who's jobs are dependent on their reputation.

This is the kind of stuff that could get my mentally ill brother hurt if people want to take out what she said aboute on him, get my mother fired if our mothers can't get along at work, or keep my father from getting jobs because he's a contractor and Amber's father is well connected within the local community.

Asides from that my social life which was largely connected to her is ruined and because of certain unrelated circumstances I have to move back into my small home town where everyone knows everybody which may affect my ability to get a job. Her slander will affect me for a really long time emotionally and socially.

>>17949542
I'm going to give you some advice that may sound crazy and childish, but (as I said before I've been accused of rape and been slandered as well), but you need to confront her personally. Press her, get in her face and let her know her shit needs to stop and if it doesn't stop after this, you're going to make it stop. Hit her even if she thinks you don't mean business. Obviously do this where no one else will see and do it in person so there's no trace. This is EXACTLY what I did with my ex girlfriend (only time I've ever hit a girl but I honestly don't regret it because I never heard anything). You have to tell this bitch you mean business, and you have to mean it as well. Feel free to call me an idiot and judge me for my actions, but hey if she wants to get rough and dirty, get rough and dirty. There's no playing fair when it comes to slander and accusations.