Change

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Anonymous
Change 2017-01-12 03:18:52 Post No. 17947974
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Change Anonymous 2017-01-12 03:18:52 Post No. 17947974 [Report]

How do I learn to accept change? I've come to the conclusion that I'm afraid of most types of change.

For example, my girlfriend wants to switch to short hair, of course I didn't tell her no, but I began feeling a sense of panic, and felt as if though this change meant the ruin of my relationship and that it was a sign that she stopped caring about my opinion on her appearance. A completely unreasonable response, right?

I cannot bring myself to meet new people or make new friends. Even though all of my old friends have left.

I try to maintain the same political opinions, even though I disagree with them.

I don't know what to do, or why I'm so afraid of change. I've ignored it up until today when I became upset and overthought something as simple as my girlfriend making a relatively small change to her appearance.

Anonymous 2017-01-12 03:59:09 Post No.17948076
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Anonymous 2017-01-12 03:59:09 Post No.17948076 [Report]

Humans are hardwired to resist change.
Dont feel the need to accept change just because you are pressured to do so
If you are happy with the way things are there's no point in forcing change for the sake of change.
If you need new friends try to meet people in a way that doesnt seem intrusive to you and doesnt feel like radical change but rather like gradual progression.

Anonymous 2017-01-12 04:14:55 Post No.17948123
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Anonymous 2017-01-12 04:14:55 Post No.17948123 [Report]

>>17948076
But is it normal to resist it to the point that I become upset when my girlfriend changes her hair length? I just feel as if this isn't normal.

Anonymous 2017-01-12 04:21:31 Post No.17948138
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Anonymous 2017-01-12 04:21:31 Post No.17948138 [Report]

>>17948123
Everything's normal. Everyone just does things to different limits. Everyone has oddities. Just work out a way that it doesn't disrupt you too much, that's the point.

Go to a psychiatrist and tell him that. He'll label you with something and give you pills and tell you to come back to him. Why? Because that's good business to him. You're the one that came to him and you said "I'm abnormal".

You can't micro control your feelings.

Anonymous 2017-01-12 04:21:32 Post No.17948139
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Anonymous 2017-01-12 04:21:32 Post No.17948139 [Report]

>>17948123
You can express your discomfort without being brash and unreasonable.
Everyone is different and maybe she can help you get through it, at least better than anyone here.
You can be weird about shit as long as you're not a dick about it and talk it out with the people involved, in this case your gf

Anonymous 2017-01-12 04:47:46 Post No.17948233
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Anonymous 2017-01-12 04:47:46 Post No.17948233 [Report]

>>17947974
It isn't healthy to feel panicked over the idea of your gf cutting her hair short. First of all, her caring about your opinion of her appearance is something you both can talk about together. As long as you're not controlling about it I'm sure you both can have a decent conversation.
When it comes to panicking, learning to manage this will be beneficial for you. Learn to identify what you can realistically control and accept what you can't control. Learn to "go with the flow" in some cases and you'll be on your way.

I'm aware that Imgur.com will stop allowing adult images since 15th of May. I'm taking actions to backup as much data as possible. Read more on this topic here - https://archived.moe/talk/thread/1694/

I'm aware that Imgur.com will stop allowing adult images since 15th of May. I'm taking actions to backup as much data as possible.
Read more on this topic here - https://archived.moe/talk/thread/1694/