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Hello /adv/,
I'm 18, in the 4th grade of high school and I have big problems at home. Parents are constantly fighting, they're screaming every insult you can imagine and are always talking about how they're going to get divorced. Now, the divorce itself isn't a problem for me since I can care less about them, the problem is that both my mother and father are insufferable cunts that treat me like shit and they just can't wait for the day when they will kick me out. My mother has alchocol problems, since she gets drunk and starts crying while insulting everyone in here surrondings 2 glasses of wine in. She often insults me, tells me that I'm a bastard child that needs to die and that I'm Satan incarnate, she calls me a drug addict, even though I don't even smoke cigs, let alone do weed or something else. My father is no better, he'll oftenly call me a bastard too, telling me how he'll enjoy throwing me out when the time comes, while constantly wallowing in his self-pity saying something like "How low have I fallend, what did I ever do to deserve this?" and just bitching about everything, while I take all the blame for it, me and the internet. He has no basis in his arguments, and when I call both of my parents on their faults they just behave like spoiled brats throwing tauntrums left and right telling me what a disgrace I am. I belive that it's for this reason that
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I felt depressed ever since in february last year and that took a toll on my grades and life as a whole. I feel rather empty, I don't find myself enjoying books/films/tv shows/vidya like I used to anymore and I'm mostly spending my time in solitude, be it inside or outside. The only thing that helps is music and midnight walks. The fact that most of my friends live hundreds of kilometers away from me doesn't help either, and the friends I do have in my hometown aren't the ones that I find trusting enough to open myself completely. I'm quite ambitious and want to realize my potential as much as possible, and that's where I need your help. I know that the best thing to do right know should be to study so I can get into a desired college, I'm planning to get a part-time job with it so I have some income, and I'll probably live in some small flat or in a dorm. The problem isn't the divorce, since I can give less shit about my parents, sounds edgy, I know, but it's true. They're both miserable beings that I have no intention of keeping in my life no more, the problem is their fights and how that affects my studying. How do I ignore the toxicity around me in? Should I study in a local library or something and stay away from my home as much as possible?
>TL;DR:
Parents are constantly fighting and are treating me like shit. How do I focus on school with all the fighting surronding me, and how do I completely ignore their exsistance until I move out?
Any help appreciated, but stay constructive, I need no pity nor did I come here to look for it.
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You should move out as soon as practical. Part-time job is a good idea so long as you actually have enough time to do your studies properly.
Select some major that both interests and can pay your bills down the road. Meet new people, make friends and form relationship.
This part you won't like, but I do believe in it, too: Once you do succeed, remember that you are better than your parents, so do help them out in their old age if and when they need you. Just keep your distance emotionally and don't allow them to drag you back as a punching bag into their toxic lives. Living far enough that you see each other rarely but close enough to be able to help when really needed would be ideal.
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>>17945856
I don't mind the last part that much, since they did raise me for all these years, even if they're both selfish cunts, I'll offer the necessary help, but as you've already said, I'll keep my distance.
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Find a job asap. ONCE YOU FIND A JOB try and move into a friend's house. Don't do this the other way around.
Your stres is a part of you. You will bring this to your job and reflect upon it while you are working. You really have one option and it is find a job.
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>>17945898
Will do.
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